I seductively pour dog food into your dog bowl which says "worlds best dog" on it. As you eat the dog food I start petting you lovingly. I start focusing on petting your butt and you turn around, you are shocked to see it's me, Justin Trudeau. BARK you say, shocked and a little nervous. "Don't worry big boy, your safe now....". That's when I take out a jar of peanut butter and smear it all over my lips and mouth. "Whose a good boy" I say, because a real concourse only ever indulges in the male hound. I lean in and you are over come with the aroma of peanut butter. "BARK" you say, but it's no use, you can't resist anymore, you lean in and start licking feverishly on my lips and mouth. "Welcome to Canada you filthy bassist hound" I say before sticking my tongue out.
I seductively pour dog food into your dog bowl which says "worlds best dog" on it...
WHAT'S ALL THIS ABOOOT, the mountie says, storming into the room. BARK you say, relieved you've been rescued. I shoot a devilish grin at you and say to the mountie, "did you bring the maple syrup and the camera? Cause somebodies been a bad bad boy".
I roll you over on your back and The Mountie pours maple syrup all over your swollen purple penis. That's when I, Justin Trudeau, Leader of Canada and legalizer of bestiality, lean in and give you one big SUCC.
AAAAAAAHHHHHWWWWWW
HHHHHHHHHOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWWWWLLLLLLLLL
After we've finished, you say BARK, as you can't believe what's just happened. BARK you say again but, I Justin Trudeau, leader of canada and legalizer of bestiality reply "Ha, there's nothing you can do doge, your in canada and I am Justin Trudeau"
"Juuuuuuuuuussssssssssstttttttttttiiiiiiiiinnnnnnnnn Trrrrrrrrrrruuuuuuuuuuddddddeeeeaaaaaauuuuuu" I whisper in your ear before I leave the room.
...
Why am i imagining a fat mulatto jerking off as hes typing this
Slide thread. Proxy samefag.
CODE RED WE'VE GOT A JOKER ON THE LOOSE
>whose his target sir?
GRAND MASTER JUSTIN HERALD OF ANIMAL LOVE AND LOOSE DOGGY BUTTHOLES
>my god sir, what should we do?
I'VE GOT IT, TYPE THIS EXACTLY AS I SAY IT
>okay sir
Ahem "Slide thread. Proxy samefag."
>what does that mean sir?
Idk But they say it sometimes and people ussually go away afterwards
>YES SIR
Don't worry justin senpai nobody is going to make fun of you while I'm in charge of public opinion.
That's you, that's how you sound.
Because you are an outstanding Canadian citizen. If you don't jerk it to doge at least twice a day you aren't a real canadian.
Bump for your approval
Why is this disgusting filth still here?
Approved, carry on
you mean Canada or the dog? One has a military, the other has diplomatic immunity.
...
Watch out China, Justins cummin and he's bringing all his syrup with him.
missed opportunity to name the pic "shhyou'resafenow"
>hey bros I heard Justin just got a pet turtle
>no way bro, I wanna FUCK the SHIT out that
>Yeah brah Canadas the fuckin best, just the other day their was this chick walkin her dog and I was like DAYYUUUUMMMMM and she called me a jerk but I told that bitch I was peepin her bitch even though she was a bitch nowuttaimsyin?
Come on guys, I can't take on the over whelming might that is Canadian bestiality by myself. Any animals lurking in this thread feel free to testify about when where and how the Canadians touched you. Reliable sources say Petco has been trafficking animal sex slaves for years now. Goddamn bastards.
wtf is this degeneracy on my Sup Forums, delet this now
South park should do an episode about Canadian bestiality and how PC principal defends it and rationalizes it to the point that he joins Juuuuuuuuuuuuuussssssssssstttttttttttiiiiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnn Trrrrrrrrrrruuuuuuuuuuuudddddddeeeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaauuuuuu in a Satanic animal orgy.
Fear not, for I have an official sanction from the Canadian government to share there culture and beliefs with you. You'll like being a dog fucker.
Now a true connoisseur of that specimen known as the bitch will tell you that to truly enjoy dog puss you've got to sniff it first. Like this, slow at first, then take a DEEP inhalation and hold it.
continue to hold it
continue to hold it, you're doing good, almost there. by now you should really be getting the flavor of it, us canadians like to call this "yummy".
While you are savoring the flavor of dog puss let I, Justin Trudeau, Glorious and enlightened leader of canada, tell you about how I came to have the idea to fuck animals in Canada. It all started two weeks ago when a friend of mine showed me this website called pornhub.... (my hair was longer back then).
any lurkers please bump this so the thread doesn't die. unless your afraid for your life from the Canadian government.
As I was saying, I justin trudeau, magnificent and handsome herald of dog sex was on pornhub when my finger slipped and I ended up searching "backyard dog sex orgy", haha how did that happen?
man i could rip on canadia all day
Anyway, my internet is really slow cause i'm in canada so I decided to just watch the doggydonasty and I must say... I was, entranced, enchanted, mesmerized. I couldn't believe the beauty of what I saw. Pregnancy worry free sex. I realized there was No need to pull out when the bitch was really a bitch. MY GOD I thought, "If only I could bring this miracle to the rest of my fellow canadians".
That's when I, Justin Trudeau, Decided to run for office. I would share my vision with the rest of Canadia. So I sold my soul to the devil and three weeks later I was elected. People call me Great, Handsome, Brilliant, Sexy, but I'm no hero. I just love dog puss.
Things invented in Canada:
1. Manners
2. Maple syrup
3. Mooses
4. Manners again
5. pronouncing English words like "about" wrong
6. Hockey
7. The Joint Task Force
8. Dog sex
9. Horse sex
10. Panda sex
11. Turtle sex
12. Goat sex
13. Lizard sex
14. Sheep sex
15. Pig sex (now you can fuck your dinner and eat it too)
16. Grizzly bear sex (watch out they bite)
17. Bird sex
The only bad part aboot being a canadian-american citizen is having to explain all the doggo porn on my computer. Why can't they understand? I'm only doing what my Canadian instincts and gloriously handsome supreme enlightened leader the mighty justin trudeau tell me.
I'm running out of canadian animal sex jokes. wtf is going on.
Okay I got one, A canadian walks into a dogs pussy, the bartender looks up and says, what are you, justin trudeau?
Knock knock
whose there?
TIS I GLORIOUS LEADER Justin OF CANADA
Gee I'm canadian and I forgot how knock knock jokes go.
you see in canada, "knock knock" jokes usually involve impregnating dogs ;^)
anyway, Show me your dog.
Gee, must be only Canadians on Sup Forums
yall got anymore of dem doges?
if you guys haven't tried maple flavored cigarettes after dogg sex I highly recommend it.
Canada doesn't into drag net surveillance right? asking for a friend.
bump for the glorious canadia
SOCKSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
I’ve made intense defecation inside mason jars for only 69 days. The combination of fast food and coffee marinated in my stomach created black children. The scent of my anal release was so rank that I would often vomit as the chocolately soft serve was sliding out my busted and loosened faggot ass. There were some days when I had not achieved the desired girth on my feces therefore I had to cheat by using a scientific medicine called Metamucil. This thickening agent tasted like orange juice, thank you scientist. I not only defecated into it but also urinated as well. The ancients of flint believe that mixing piss and shit would create an medicinal product called “jenkum”. In the ancient times, African warriors would smoke this medicinal herb before going into battle. Chief Bambosay Oluwulusambaaaaaal would often sing while smoking the sacred kaka, “oooooo kill Deh white man, drink dee blood of the children” a brave valiant warrior ahead of his time Bambosa was often regarded as a wine connoisseur, although he neve
SOOOOOOOOCKSSS
tl;dr
anybody like SOCKSSSSSS?
FUCK CANADA AND FUCK THE FAGGOT WHITE TRASH KEKNADIANS
HALAL SOOOOOCKSSSS
I AM KEKOO FOR SOOOOOOCKKSSSSS!!!!
lmao faggot mods put c-uck in the world filter...
cuc-koo becomes cuckoo
SOOOOOCKKKKKSSSS
I LOVE SOCKSSS
I WISH I COULD MARRY SOCKS
Bump
Came from X with love
yeah, SOCK it too em JUSSSSSSTTTTTTTTIIIIIIIINNNNNNNN
fuck keep going
Sage and report off topic threads.
We let the US do it for us, because it's not illegal for them to do it and then share the data with CSIS
Go away Justin, and take your sock humor with you.
Guys, I'm canadian visiting, but well, I lack the confidence of our grand visionary justin trudeau.
I WANT to have sex with animals, just like any sane canadian, but I'm just too much of a pussy to go to the animal shelter, my palms start sweating and I stutter when the delicious doggos start barking. It's a shame because I'm a NICEGUY and have sooooooooooo much to offer doge.
If only there was a canadian website to matchmake poor CANADIAN guys like me with animals so I could get to know doggo before I tie him up in my basement and rape doggo repeadetedly and then pass him around the nieghborhood.
A CANADIAN can dream though....
If only I was like our GRAND ENLIGHTENED VISIONARY JUSTIN TRUDEAU I could have ALL the animal sex I wanted... *sob*
I want to keep going fellow canadian, defender of the animal virtue, but my balls are dry, I need a break, get the peanut butter and put some on my balls, and put one of these on doggo so I can have a good ol canadian bestiality laugh. you got any maple flavored cigs?
What did one canadian say to the other?
"Let's go to the animal shelter and fuck dogs"
GET IT?
haha
fucking dogs
Someone PLEASE screencap this thread. Brilliant!
As the great modern and enlightened philosopher-commander Justin Trudeau once said "Without dog puss the source of my unholy power is severed. Indeed, without dog puss, the demon in my soul will consume me from the inside out. I need dog puss to survive".
As do we all Justin
As do we all
Wise words that any Canadian would live by.
Lmao it’s americans begging for foreign animal porn LARP
They wonder why the rest of the world hates them for being ignorant mutt degenerates
>EXAMPLE A
Include me in the screencap
A most humble Ode to Justin:
Oh Justin
Before your biking photoshoots and islamic homo socks....
I wondered...
Will
Oh will
Will this great man ever legalize sex with doggo?
Well
My Esteemed leader
you did.
Chinese may eat doggo
Americans may play with doggo
But Now us Canadians are free
free to fuck doggo
Oh justin, I must wonder
When was first time you fuck doggo?
You must have been young
To carry such passion
Such vision and drive
at such a young age
As a canadian I can only hope my children fuck the doge as young as you did.
Now
thanks to glorious enlightened handsome supreme leader of public relations justin trudeau
all the world knows
you go to thailand to fuck underage girls
and you go to canada to fuck doggo
Thank you Justin Trudeau
You are truly
Mans best friend.
My skype is
dogpuss4lyfe
add me justin
Have you guys heard about this?
The Canadian royal historic society recently unearthed an original Canadian version of the karma suetra, you know the indian sex book.
Have you seen this? do you know about this?
Well apparently what sets it apart from the Indonesian one is there is only one position, doggy style, HOWEVER, it shows you how to preform doggy style ON EVERY SPECISE OF ANMAL
truly fascinating.
Thank you for your contribution to the world canada.
It's Kama sutra go kys it ruined your entire shitty joke
Finn seek out and knot his wife
Welcome to humans anonymous paul, would you like to tell us your story?
>well I'm a little nervous
Don't worry paul we're all canadians here
>o-o-okay
>Hi my name is paul and I've been having sex with humans since I was 16 years old
HAAAIIII PAUL
>yes well, my friends were getting concerned about my well being so they staged and intrevention
that's very good paul, it's important to have a support network of your fellow canadians, we can learn from paul fellow members
>thank you, well, they took me to a friends house and presented me with a pure bred poodle
>it was my first doggo
>I'd been choking parrots up to that point but I'd never actually penetrated anything before and I was nervous you know?
we all had are first canadian dog sex paul, go on
>well, After petting doge and licking doge cunt, I fuck literal shit out doge ass while fellow canadian friends take pictures
oh do you have the pictures with you paul?
>yes, yes I do, and as a PROUD DISCIPLE OF JUSTIN TRUDEAU I would like to share them
Oh they are beautiful paul!
>I'm also proud to say I haven't had human puss since then
WONDERFUL PAUL
We can all learn a great deal from pauls bravery
thank you paul
>don't thank me
thank justin trudeau
Fuck you I've been ripping on canada solo this entire thread, you think I have a magic dog puss to pull all these bestiality jokes out from like JUSTIN TRUDEAU?
Fuck.
You.
you aren't even canadian you don't understand