Convince me that FFXIII isn't kino

Convince me that FFXIII isn't kino

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it's a pretty solid game but not many like it

The background is just a fucking picture when you look it up close the levels are pretty fucking simple looking.

That stupid goddamn piano theme constantly playing at the start of every sentence or event ruined the game.

So? They used matte paintings for backdrops in films and it doesn't make them look any less good.

It does look bad because the backgrounds are at 720p and they look blurry as fuck.

it's a shit and incoherent mess

>incoherent mess

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It's alright. Pretty good soundtrack, probably the overall hardest combat in the series, and great visuals that still look good.

Story and characters are complete garbage, and while I'm fine with the linearity I wish the areas had more mechanical gimmicks to keep them feeling fresh.

7/10

Whats the plot?

Pure Kino, Railway Simulator 20XIV improved on it even more.

You kill God's son's messengers, then lesbians become crystals

>It opens up after 40 hours

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Defying fate?

What is KINO ?n

Sup Forums meme, to describe ironic masterpiece ;)

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This. Gameplay isn't too bad when it actually fucking begins. Even the world is actually interesting. But the writing is unforgivably bad.

It's not a coincidence that people who use the term "kino" are drooling retards.

To be fair, outside of side games and maybe XII, the characters and plot have never been the strong point of FF

I've been playing it for the first time this week. Better than I expected, but I went in with such low expectations it would be pretty bad if it didn't exceed them.

The first 6 chapters were typical obnoxious FF drama. But unlike past FF games, it actually led to a payoff. The stories behind Sezh and Hope were actually handled very good. And even Lightning is a good character who grows.

The only character I never liked was Vanille. Even her Japanese voice sounds fake. And yes, I realize her role is to fake being optimistic and lie to everyone. But the cutscenes made it so obvious that even in chapter 2, I could tell she was the key to everything. And them constantly deflecting from exposition and stalling the explanation of what Pulse, Cocoon, Sanctum, i'cie and all that junk was didn't help. But again, it all got better in Chapter 7 and on.

Music is some of the best in the whole series and the graphics are good. Too linear, but I went in expecting that.

In all, it's a pretty average game, but pretty high for a Final Fantasy game.

Why do you kill Gods son's messengers? Is he just being a cunt like metatron?

"Moms are tough"

Basically

Gods are always cunts user, didn't you see the other thread

they're not his 'messengers', they're his worker drones made to find a way into the unseen world so the Goddess' son could finish the job killing his mother

>the second the camera focuses on her, I know everything that's going to happen
>it all plays out exactly as I envisioned, right down to the 'unexpected' collateral explosion
>hope spends the next 7 chapters bitching about it but never has the guts to fucking say anything

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Messengers, drones. It's more or less the same difference. After all, they deliver the the message of Fuck You by making people l'cie

I sort of agree, but there is a difference between game having generic but enjoyable story, and game trying so hard it shits the bed.
The stories of most FF games before PS3-era are still enjoyable these days, they have decent characters, worlds to lose yourself in and some twists to the plot. It's not necessary for every story to be so deep it makes you question your existance, sometimes generic thing executed well is enough.

>it gets good after 40 hours

God is turning people into cherry flavored slushies?

The fal'Cie are kino
youtu.be/H3UT8g3jQG0

it never gets good though

>I sort of agree, but there is a difference between game having generic but enjoyable story, and game trying so hard it shits the bed.
>The stories of most FF games before PS3-era are still enjoyable these days
I would put the stories in FFII, IV and X as the "trying too hard" category. In fact, I'd say FFIV is the worst offender in the series

Well you are encased in an ice like crystal if you succeed in your mission

and ends after 43

Mission? Wait so is this God's son, the goddess's or someone else's mission? What exactly is the mission? And why do you get turned into a slush puppy if you succeed?

Messengers' (fal'cie) mission. And because if you fail you become a mindless monster. So i guess eternal beauty is preferable to unending nightmare?

Godtier soundtrack

>But the writing is unforgivably bad.
Having played the game in the original Japanese with English subtitles, I just want to point out that the English translation is REALLY off in so many scenes. Now I'm not saying that makes the Japanese story good. Oh hell no, all the stuff like l'cie getting turned into crystals and the motivation for half the characters is typical FF stuff on the stupid level of the Fayth in FFX. But I'm just pointing out that it might have seemed even worse if you played the game with just English on.

And maybe even the English voices colored your opinion on the characters/story. I don't know because I purposefully avoided them. I heard a few seconds of Fang and Vanille's voice and that was enough for me to skip it.

Also, fuck you translators. Her name is VANILLA! The Japanese characters fucking say Va-ne-u-ra. It's not an e at the end!

The fal'Cie turn humans into l'Cie and give them a focus (mission) but they only give a vague vision of what it is (most fail). It's on a time limit, either they fulfil it and be turned to crystal, or fail and turn into Cie'th (crystal zombies), or Cie'th stones
People turn to crystals because fal'Cie and Gods in FFXIII *are* sentient crystals; they basically put people into a crystal bondage by turning them into l'Cie. fal'Cie don't give humans magic, humans already have magic and can break out of their focus with sheer strength of will, like Fang did

Better than XV opening after 3 minutes and the whole world is practically empty with boring fetch quests and fast traveling to and from your car just to use the car to fast travel again. Also those fucking missions where you have to find objects on the ground then the sun goes down so you cant see anything unless your right on-top of it.

mind this going strictly from info in FFXIII, they get too autistic about the lore in the sequels

Yeah, FFXV is basically "let's take FFXIII chapter 12 and make it the whole game." I'm a huge fan of open world exploration. But Final Fantasy is one series where it doesn't fit. Leave that to Dragon Quest. Final Fantasy focuses on story and set pieces, so its one of the few game series that should embrace linearity. But in order to do that, they need to have good story content.

Didn't play xiii-2, but Lightning Returns is basically a Final Fantasy skinned Valkyrie Profile: Lenneth

Oh ok so the crystal gods are like some kinda lovecraft aliens who have to communicate through psychic dreams to get what they want. And what their focus can be whatever the fuck they want at that moment and they give you a time limit so you don't fuck around. So if I'm getting the plot of ff13 correctly some aliens from another world come to this world to kill some goddess because i guess she's a cunt. To do this they enslave the natives, give them a physic dream to help them kill said goddess and if they are too stupid to understand they zombie them. If they are helpful they give them what they consider godhood, eternity as a crystal. Am I on the money so far?

Not even close.

fal'cie on Cocoon and Pulse both work together towards a common goal. Fulfilling the conditions to open Etro's Gate to the Unseen World for Bhunivelze (God), so he can finish killing his mother Mwynn

The fal'Cie are like Archons in gnostic lore, and their creator is the Demiurge, and his 'mother' is like Sophia. The FFXIII Demiurge locked his mother out of the world by killing her/sending her to the unseen world. But the world is in constant state of decay so he thought his mother cursed the world, and created his fal'Cie/Archons to find a way into the unseen world so he could finish his mother off. Those training facilities for l'Cie, the 'Arks', were actually made to carry armies into the unseen world to fight the Goddess. Humans inherently have greater magic potential so fal'Cie use them as tools, but the game was kinda vague on how humans have this power til they have all this stuff about Chaos in the sequels.

>That ground texture

Jesus Christ, what fucking dog shit. And I don't mean the quality, I mean the aesthetic. Absolute trash.

Convince me that this mouse isn't worth my love.

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Oh ok so the falcie, who are basically demi-god liaisons to the mortals are originally from Not-earth which is where I assume the countries of pulse and cocoon are located. They are otherworldy super beings that can't normally talk to humans so they create orders through dreams, although wait i thought the whole point of archons was that they were the go between of gods and mortals. Whats the point of them if they can't just tell the people of pulse and cocoon "hey open the 7th seal so we can kill this bitch killing your planet" Oh its because its been awhile right? So falcie have been gone for so long that the current day mortals no longer speak their dead language when its time for them to come back and tell them to open the gate to the punch dimension so they can kill the cunt goddess. Right?

Nah, they can speak mortal language. The leader of cocoon is a fal'cie afterall They are just asshole that like being cryptic

>i thought the whole point of archons was that they were the go between of gods and mortals
Those are classical demons; Archons are set up to actively rule over the material world and the hylics/somatics.

>hard combat
>button that literally plays the entire game for you while you just watch

>They are just asshole that like being cryptic
In other words, deflection so they don't just reveal the whole story right away. Same thing as all the Yevon and Fayth junk in FFX. Otherwise FFX would have been a 4 hour game.

but isn't the goddess killing them from the other side of the gate? What if the humans fuck up and NEVER open the gate? Or like not understand the dream and make the gate ultra instinct sealed? I mean there's being an asshole to mortals because you can get away with it and then there is just being stupid. Are the fal'ice just stupid retards with too much power like kefka?

If you just sit there spamming auto, you will die to a lot of things. The game can be played mostly auto, but you still need to peragrim (sp) shift a lot and libra some enemies.

>he thinks automating commands is the real battle system and not building effective paradigms and switching them near constantly to react to threats

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>Halfway past the game
>Still get tutorial sections
Jesus fuck

Mwynn's actually dead already. The thing consuming the world is Chaos, which is basically just entropy born from human emotion. It's literally the Darkness from Kingdom Hearts more or less

It's kind of obvious that the fal'Cie are liars. The lead fal'Cie on Cocoon is named Bandersnatch originally, a shapeshifter, and his boss form has a bunch of faces to imply that he's duplicitous. l'Cie can destroy fal'Cie and shrug off their focus if they have the insight, so the fal'Cie need to obfuscate everything that's happening, even what their 'focus' is. The fal'Cie can't actually command l'Cie.

I like the game but the game waiting until Chapter fucking 11 (of 13!!) to stop holding your hand and let you explore is goddamn infuriating. Especially weird since 12 told you almost dick all from the jump and even made you build your own gambits.

come to think of it 'fal'Cie' is actually a play on the word fallacy too. It's kind of corny, but I guess they tried to be more creative than simply naming them Archons.

fal'

l'

cie

It's a dead giveaway and something people should figure out right away.

How did you 5-star vercingetorix and long gui while only pressing x?

Ignoring that there is no actually payoff and all your hours of getting fucked by tonberry is to realize the actual real world truth that the world is going to be consumed and you literally can't do anything about it, the fal'cie DON'T KNOW this at the time right? So again, for all they know Mwynn is chilling in hammerspace having a laugh and they risk their only hope to fuck her up on a fucking goof to fuck with mortals? No wonder when it comes crashing down and it hurts inside you can take a stand, no sell the zombie curse, and leg drop them. The plot of ff13 is a bunch of anime teens kicking the shit out of some jabroni god kings. I guess if it looks cool thats not a terrible plot. I've seen worse angles.

If you need convincing of that you're likely too retarded to understand why it's such a steaming pile of horse shit.

The sequels really fucked the whole mythology up

I'm not sure the fal'Cie know anything about Mwynn (that was what Pulse and Lindzei were tasked with). They only want to be reunited with *their* creators; Lindzei and Pulse. They're like orphaned children throwing a tantrum to get their parents to notice them again. The last boss is named Orphan ffs. This is another obvious gnostic allusion.

The only truth is that Etro was a mistake

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>Convince me that FFXIII isn't kino
It has Lightning in it.
She automatically makes things kuso, not kino.

Why? She's okay.

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Lighting wasn't bad in FFXIII. Now, I haven't played FFXIII-2 or Lightning Returns so my opinion might change. But in the first game, she's fine.

It's 20 hours of straight coridoors, no character development, autobattle trash gameplay, nothing interesting happens, an empty plain 20 hours in then two more chapters of corridors to an anticlimactic end that was so bad that 13-2 retconned it.

XV is better than anything in the trasheap in 13. And those fetch quests are the same exact thing you did in the classic FFs.

A good summary. Man I was so disappointed with this game, I don't understand how it managed to get good reviews. Probably because it has "Final Fantasy" in the title.

Lightning is love
Lightning is life
Lightning a cute
A CUTE
I LOVE LIGHTNING SO FUCKING MUCH
I'M GOING TO MARRY LIGHTNING
I want to hold hands and have consensual sex with her in the missionary position for the sole purpose of procreation
If she told me she was pregnant with my child tomorrow I would immediately take responsibility so we could build a home and raise a family together

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The PC version is the real FF13 score.

It's a great game but the aesthetic was pretty boring. Reminds me of FF8

>13-2 retconned it
It did? I thought it continued along.

kys
FFVIII's aesthetics are pure kino

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>It's 20 hours of straight coridoors
True

>no character development
False

>autobattle trash gameplay
Mostly false

>nothing interesting happens
False. What happens isn't amazing, but claiming an absolute "nothing" is wrong.

>an empty plain 20 hours in
Somewhat false. It's full of hunts and side quests. Just like the big open fields in FFX and XII.

>mfw I prefer idealized clean futuristic settings
>almost everyone else wants dirty, gritty dystopias

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No that's not it.

I could care either way, but, it's boring. The first half of the game was like the same copy pasta over and over.

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But you equated it to FFVIII. And the first disk is where all the variety is in FFVIII. Going on totally different missions and seeing a wide variety of places. FFXIII would have been great if it did this. Instead of 'lol we're on the lamb and Hope keeps whining'

What, you basically stay in the same place the first hour of that game, too, lol.

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This.
XIII aesthetics do have a connection to the more advanced civilizations in VIII, but VIII had more varied locations and also did the mix of old and new way better than XV did.

>the first hour
So you're complaining about the whole game based on the first hour?

No?

I said the first half up above.
Why are you gushing so hard over FFVIII?

It's hardly the best in the series; good game, but, it had its down falls and I felt like it's aesthetics where that.

Do you want me to kick your ass?

I'm not gushing over it. I'm questioning why you compared FFVIII to XIII with questions. And you keep changing your points.

It's been almost ten years and people still pretend not to adore Lightning. I don't understand, is it an insecurity thing? Just because Lightning is great doesn't mean you aren't great, too.

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She's not just great. She's perfect.

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What points did I change?

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Yuna vs Rinoa
fight to the death

>FFXIII is like FFVIII in aesthetics
I questioned what you mean as I don't see much similarities between them.
>no I don't mean aesthetics I mean its boring
I pointed out the first disk of FFVIII is the major interesting part of FFVIII and totally opposite of FFXIII where the first half of XIII is bad.
>lol but you stay in the same place for an hour in both games
Wait, are you talking about the first half of the game or the first hour?
>stop gushing over FFVIII!

This is how our conversation has gone. And I have a feeling you're gonna throw out another tangent that makes no sense.

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Lightning Returns was more like FFVIII on aesthetics
FFXIII was more like Dirge of Cerberus. All the soldiers looked like deep ground mooks.

I don't see how any of that doesn't make sense?

In both FFVIII and FFXIII I found they way they look boring; especially early on in the game.

Is that so hard to comprehend?

>Is that so hard to comprehend?
Well yes, for the reasons I pointed out. But it hardly matters. You're welcome to your opinion and don't have to explain it if all it is is a 'feeling'.

Can I borrow a feeling?

it's a good game