"Tell me about a time when you worked on a team"

>"Tell me about a time when you worked on a team"

>"If you were an animal, what animal would you be, and why?"

>>"If you were an animal, what animal would you be, and why?"
Definitively human.

It's because they're looking for people who aren't complete spurgs and can actually accomplish things with other people.

Is saying you worked on team projects in university a good answer?

anything but a nigger (including their variants: sandnigger, streetshitternigger, gooknigger, etc)

A domestic cat

Live lazy, carefree neet life.

I've got a million stories to pull out for that one.

Is it seriously a problem for you people? Shit, I manage my own software team.

does DOTA count?

I had this question and just after that one even further, "Tell a conflict experience working on a team". You can answer pretty much what you want as long as you explain yourself with coherence.

The tested answer sequence is:

> Opening: Say the positive part of having a team for that task: distribution of work, planning, expertise...
> Truth: Tell a negative part that was compensated by having the team. This shows you are not bullshitting and can work, and see something positive in group work.
> Closing: Speak about how did it work overall, and speak of numbers (they love this shit in any field): number of colleagues and complexity of the task, your contribution there, if the deadline was met...

Note that if they have made you pass a test before and your answer is made up, or sloppy in details they will notice, because they are cross-checking with your personality traits. On the other hand, be your answer sequence somewhat resembling reality and paced you will land the job with ease.

I've got a million stories to pull out for that one.
Is it seriously a problem for you people? Shit, I am an animal.

Fired before you're even hired.

Yeah? Well I've eaten bigger pieces of shit than you for breakfast.

>"Tell me about a time you had difficulties in your job and how you solved them"
bitch I was fired because of those difficulties

I've never had difficulties in a job.
If you got a problem yo i'll solve it.

You eat shit for breakfast?

you would actively choose to lead the shittiest life known to Earth?
poor decision confirmed

>Tell me about the time you assimilated with all lifeforms
>what?
>oh you mean you're not like us?
>they morph out of their shells and become grey goo

I want subhuman commies to leave

...

well, It wasn't preety, in the end I quitted because It stressed me so much I HAD to take some drugs every day before I got there just to not lose it and punch everyone in their face, it was killing me inside.

There was this bitch that only got herself in some stupid problem so we had to help her and we get behind schedule.
There was also this smartass dyke, well at least I think she was a dyke because she seemed to be disgusted by men, she wasn't so bad to work with but she sometimes got into my nerves.

The worst of all was this guy who tought he could always boss us around just because his father was the owned the place we worked at. I think he had a thing for the redhead bitch, but I always tought the redhead and the dyke were secretly dating.

We also had a dog, the dog was cool.

i want umaru to doggypaddle in my semen.

>"Thank you for your interest in our company. Unfortunately we had chosen another candidate for the position. Mr. McBarkston Fluff got the position."

Don't call us, we'll call you.

Sure

Maybe... There was one guy who got a job in a American embassy because he led a guild on EVE online. Depends on how you can sell it and tell about how you solve problems with other people.

>"Tell me about a time when you worked on a team"
Team member #4 didn't do his tiny bit of the project and made the rest of us get a failing grade.
>people wonder why I choose to work alone whenever possible

what if you say you worked on a video game team project as the music composer, engine programmer, screenplay writer, 3D modeller/animator, concept illustrator, menu designer, voice actor, and social media marketer?

>a wo-
>we have someone else for the position, thank you.

a wombat?

>Why do you want to work for our company?
Cause I need money you dumb fuck..

Does not sound like a team

there's another composer, artist, 3D animator/modeller, and programmer, but i do big chunks of asset production.

You are supposed to emphasize the team aspect and make yourself stand out as maybe 10% better, or reference an issue the team was struggling with and how you personally solved it. You aren't supposed to sound narcissistic

A tortoise so I never have to leave my home.

how is it narcissistic if i give results? you sound like you're projecting way too hard here. just because it might be overwhelming for you to be capable of handling 90% of the work a team has been delegated doesn't mean the same for me, and if you were this defense about me saying this during an interview you're probably not worth working with let alone under.

Now imagine you saying that to an interviewer. It screams "difficult to work with" and "huge ego".

>Please implement FizzBuzz
I ended up writing 3 different implementations since I had a lot of time. It was only for an internship but thanks anyway, Sup Forums.

>What are some of your hobbies outside of work
>mfw

>TFW guy in our IT department is autistic furry and has worn wolf ears and tails on several occasions

>not knowing that's a trick question they use to filter out animals and reptillians posing as humans
heh, it's like you kiddos have never worked in industry

just because i'm not always humble doesn't mean i'm difficult. i like to multitask, how does that scream ego?

here's how this situation always escalates. people like you have a task and i offer to help and you comply when you in fact would want me to fuck off because you wanted to work on your own, but wish to adhere to the team philosophy otherwise you'd be a hypocrite. in this situation your mentality is 'man user is a total control freak i hate him" when all i did is offer help because like i said, i like doing different tasks outside what i may have a degree/cert in.

all of this just because you think that i should stick to my own role and follow some range of proficiency so that i don't show up anyone. it's immature. if you don't want me to do it, then say it. i am more than humble in that context, but only if it's requested. otherwise i am more than willing to inject myself into various tasks that need to be completed.

I've never had difficulties with my job but if I did, I imagine I would solve them by being even more awesome than I already am

If you can't see it, you're autistic. You may be factually correct, but it doesn't matter when you're being screened for whether you're a weirdo or not.

you haven't even made an argument. you've called me autistic and weird. cool. explain why and don't sit behind "You just don't see it" lol.

it seems like you wanna dish out insults and criticism yet can't take any yourself. im open to criticism but not ad hominem.

Nigga, I have had to supervise and interview people. I worked with someone that sounded like you, she came across as a patholgical liar and a liability in the workplace.

The question is supposed to evaluate how you work in a team.

"I did most everything myself" does not say "I'm a team player", it says "I think I can do it all on my own and fuck whoever gets in my way."

lol let me break down your argument.

1)appeal to authority (i've been in this position so my word over yours lol)
2)anecdote (this other person had similar traits to you, and the others which aren't present i didn't like, even if they aren't present here, so yeah i don't like you)

is this really what you're basing this off of? you haven't actually attacked my own personality other than bringing up my ego, which i already debunked by pointing out i am more than humble so long as it isn't a detriment to productivity. you're actually suggesting that showing a large amount of skills is a bad thing. it isn't.

i didn't mean to try and suggest i did most of the work, just that i got to be exposed to many parts of the pipeline to where i could make significant judgement calls that would improve workflow and waterfall dates.

>seriously applying to jobs and not using your connections and network to land positions
This is how you know you'll be poor for the rest of your life.

Canadian

do you even know how connections are made? actually answer this question im curious about how you think this works.

1. make friends at work/school if you're still learning
2. converse with friends about things in your industry
3. they recommend you for jobs in their company

Most people in Sup Forums never make it past step 1.

i have a good amount of friends but in terms of reccomendations for jobs how do you know they have any real sway?

im honestly interested in just doing government co-op. i might even get a part time job with the feds due to my aunt.

also does patreon pay well for sfm porn commissions and if so, how do i not let this get traced back to my job.

okay so there five of us two girls and three guys. i was assigned with scheduling, coordinating, and keeping track of our group meetings. find out one of the girls was being fucked by one of the guys. i schedule a meeting and they're not there (the group knew they were off fucking) really pissed and awkward atmosphere.

Chad was literally fucking both the girls how am i supposed to get antyhing done?

>1. make friends

Yeah if you're here you're probably already too far fucking gone. The only way to be good enough friends with people to get recommendations is to be VERY social and likeable. People who get anywhere in life don't waste time on Sup Forums.

>i have a good amount of friends but in terms of reccomendations for jobs how do you know they have any real sway?
Call them and ask them honestly. If you still wanna apply the old fashioned way most companies have an internal recommendations section in their application. This usually brings them to the front of the stack to be viewed.

bearded vulture. nicknamed bone breaker, diet is almost entirely bones/bone marrow, and when in the mood for meat throws animals off cliffs then eats them.

>Chad was literally fucking both the girls how am i supposed to get antyhing done?
Work on improving yourself and not give a fuck about anything is a great way to get through life. If it works for Chad it'll work for you. Stop caring about actual skills so much. It's meaningless.

> "Tell me user, have you ever killed anybody?"

>"Give us an example of an office disagreement or problem you've had and the steps you took to resolve it."

"Tell me about a time you had a disagreement with a coworker, and how you worked with them to solve the problem."

not yet.

That's not true; Donald J. Trump browses Sup Forums.

>>"What's the most [blank] thing you've ever done?"
>suddenly you need to remember my whole life story
>suddenly you can't

>Welcome aboard!

why would I need to remember your life story

>1)appeal to authority (i've been in this position so my word over yours lol)

It's not appeal to authority if the authority is relevant. Appealing to what a scientist say about science is a good argument because the knowledge he has is relevant.

And you DO sound narcissistic and difficult to work with. At least if you present yourself like that

>he can't lie
>wonders why he fails in capitalism

>can't win
>blame others

>"a kawaii fox because it's my spirit animal!"
>take out thinkpad x41 running gentoo
>spin screen around to interviewer
>point at wallpaper of busty anthro fox
>"just like that!"
>interviewer looks at me weirdly
>she tells me that her spirit animal is also a fox
>we passionately make out in her office
>I get the job

I love working at Google

Working on teams is inegeral to how companies operate.