Laptop shut down with lid closed

>laptop shut down with lid closed
>windows update chime goes off

Except that can't happen, shit for brains. Kill yourself.

>open wifi
>"FBI Surveillance Van" flashes for a second

>unplugs mouse
>Dvd gets ejected and tower beeps
>whole city loses power

>turn on computer and shutdown networking.
>run antivirus.
>return a few hours later when scan is finished.
>see "You need some updates"

>windows update chime
wut
>reddit file name
OK, no more questions

>wake up at night
>computer light is on, webcam light too
>screen is off

>browse onion websites
>command prompt opens for a second when I open a certain site

>download game from torrents
>virus scanner flags file as trojan
>comments all say false positive
>install game, disable av
>start computer the next day, windows doesnt load
>I pay the 600 bucks to unlock my files

My wifes son explained to me why I did a stupid thing

there're still people who doesn't use virtualbox with gpu passthrough for gayming. Sad!

>when the boot beep goes off
>screen stays black

>buy shitty ricer mainboard
>one of it's features is that it speaks out the errors which occurred in the BIOS
>everyone is surprised when my PC tells me that the "BIOS initialization is complete"

>clean GPU from thermal paste
>don't know that extremely tiny resistors are around the GPU chip (because they were covered by thermal paste)
>accidentally scrub them off

>dead laptop GPU

The macbook pro with retina display does not have this problem.

This. Leaving Windows to come to macOS was the best decision I've ever made

>we found 7 threats and fixed it
>nothing on quarantine
>no ļ̰̫̣͈̲̥̅̀ͅo̖͉̠ͯͤ̔͌g̜s̮͐̽̽̃̾̔

Now THAT is a rare frog

>Turn on laptop
>Hear explosion in distance

>being the most brilliant hacker in England
>accidentally connecting a terrorist laptop to the MI6 network
>agency hacked instantly

>browse onion forum
>see cheese pizza
>webcam light flashes

>browse onion sites
>"this page wants to access your location"

>hacker knew exactly how top secret mi6 network worked
>freed himself from jail by timely executing commands he couldn't have know on os he couldn't have know on an architecture he couldn't have know

why can't you just create a fake pci device in the guest with the same vendor ID/whatever ID as your normal card and forward all requests (however the fuck that works) from the guest to the host
and then on the host side read out the fucking framebuffer
why is this not possible
why

>wonder what that security slider does
>slide it to top
>canvas extraction blocked everywhere

well..
>what is gpu passthrough

you can't directly access the guest framebuffer
and you can only pass through entire iommu groups

> alright lads now this is the laptop of someone who's always been three steps ahead of us
> a true mastermind
> i'm just gonna plug it straight into the network, no fuckin' worries

>laptops in deep sleep mode
>turns on and runs fan at max speed at midnight even though the lids closed.
this actually happened last night, im scared for my childrens lives now

>TOR is useless

>ssh into orange pi
>netstat
>shady external ip adress
>its sshing aswell
>geoip it
>its chinese

Fucking this.
I have to literally unplug my pc to prevent it from turning on at 3 am.

mine does that while sleeping

>not having a single firewall

>Windows
found your problem

>Shutdown laptop
>Close lid
>Open it up hours later
>Windows is Shutting Down
>mfw it went to sleep in the middle of the shutdown process

Windows? It has a maintenance hours setting that turns on for updates when you aren't using it.
cute, sleep tight lappie!
>have elitebook
>force shut off
>bleep
>feel sad for making my computer scream
its an autistic kind of feel my dudes. Same with backspaces that make a loud BEEEP

Its behind a router, forwarded to ports 80 and 22

>Falling victim to ransomware
Pleb

>have phone camera set to not save location
>take picture
>gps pin shows briefly in the notification bar

>GO ON FOUR CHAN SLASH GEE
>SEE THIS THREAD
>ONLY RETARDS POSTING
>LOL XD

I can't have SSH on port 22 anymore, it just gets bombarded constantly. I changed mine to port