Why does so much weird shit happen in Florida America-san?

Why does so much weird shit happen in Florida America-san?

what happens here?

there are just old people, latinos, tony montana, tommy vercetti, beaches, vintage porn, swamps and alligators.

Lots of old people, lots of tourists, many minorities, place gets fucked up every other year by nature, swamps up the ass, alligators everywhere, nearly evenly split between republicans and democrats.

It's a cesspit of mayhem.

Weird shit happens in every single American state.
Florida just has an unfortunate mishmash of bayou crazies, stupid hicks and angry city people plus cocaine trafficking and Cuban refugees.

it's true that the north is very redneck?

because Lynyrd Skynyrd is a Floridan band and they are always with "MUH ALABAMA"

Yes, northern florida is almost indistinguishable from alabama

Implying Florida isn't completely hillbilly with some northern state people moving there to die

Northern and central Florida are very similar to the American deep south in a lot of ways, but the beaches and southern part of the state are more laid back and somewhat similar to the west coast.

m8 the coast is practically California.

Does anyone else think it's weird that Disney scans your fingerprints before they even let you in? I would be awfully pissed off if I flew in from another country only to turn around and go home because I don't want the beast to have my prints.

I did not know this.
Glad that I won't have to find this out the hard way now.
Seems like a gross invasion of my privacy that somehow they're able to get away with because corporations are people.

they need to make sure that you are a real human and not a lizard infiltrator.

disney is the real protector of the human race and most people don't even know this.

Lizard infiltrators have been able to duplicate our fingerprints for generations.

Also Florida has lax laws regarding privacy of criminals, so when somebody does something stupid and they get arrested, the arrest report, mugshot etc are in the public domain.

I'm a pretty crazy guy so I'd probably fit in right there. Examples:

>randomly climb trees in the night and just sit there
>sometimes skip sleeping and even eating because I don't want to
>spend hours a day just thinking about the zombie apocalypse
>watch gore and shit on liveleak and don't care

It's private property, they could require a DNA sample for entry if they wanted. Also they have security watching the place like a Vegas casino floor; if you wipe a booger on the wall, they know.

>Sporkgrrl so randum lol!

>they could require a DNA sample for entry
You really don't want to go down that road, do you?

Can you top Florida Man, though?

>Florida man, disfigured from a self-inflicted shotgun blast to the face, sets fire to apartment complex after management requests that he stop masturbating in front of windows and open doors

there is an old saying
florida only has three counties - dade broward palm
the rest is lower alabama/georgia

It's the country's insane asylum so the crazies don't spill over into other states. We have one for the crazies in the west: Colorado.