/dpt/ - Daily Programming Thread

Old thread: What are you working on, Sup Forums?

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en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Write_once,_run_anywhere
twitter.com/SFWRedditGifs

Please?

>If an infinite number of monkeys will type infinitely long on a computer, one will eventually write a valid Java program.
Will they though?

They already do in India.

Idris > Haskell > OCaml

OCaml doesn't support multicore
Haskell doesn't support nightcore

Birst for B

What do you call the concept/design of something like Java/Docker, where a platform is cross-platform but is identical over all the platforms at the potential expense of increased overhead, etc?
>Inb4 POO

POO

if you can't figure this out you should reconsider falling for the "everyone can code" meme

They would first have to identify corrupt code, so no; monkeys can not do the same with programming as they are famous for in Hollywood.

>ruby is the cutest
>C is not a trap

factually inaccurate

All three of those languages are dead/deprecated.

>They would first have to identify corrupt code,
no they wouldn't. do you not understand the concept of infinity

Damn, so original. Just like asanna.

GOD I want to fucking impregnate Ruby-tan so BAD

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Write_once,_run_anywhere

>>ruby is the cutest
>not C
Is there something you'd like to tell us, user?

>write once, run away

Kill yourself pedophile

If infinite monkeys typed to infinitely many computers at least one would make a program capable of working.

>infinaty
Please smash your keyboard until you re-create myspace. I was gonna say Facebook, but I feel kind.

Infinity doesn't exist so the point is moot.

I can figure this out, just like I can figure out most difficult problems that someone had before me:

>google "13 cards face up randomly"
>open first result
>sanity check the solution

there, i did it.

the irony here is that you're too stupid to come up with a novel problem that can't be googled.

moot is a person, not a point

Just finished getting a "hud" (crosshairs) to render on my gaem. Gotta make it less hard coded though.

The idea is a substring eventually has a valid Java program. If you don't like that answer, then attach an EOF key to their keyboards.

At least it wasn't C#. Sick fuck.

Who here C?

oh wow you really don't

explains why you can't understand the flip 13 cards solution

lmao you're the brainlet from last thread aren't you

Moot is the whole point, though.

I'm looking for something that's in between C and C++

C+

C+

nope, just got home, but now im curious, who do you think i am?

i like when retards get buttblasted btw

I juts got a boner and I don't know why

Damn...free beer........

...

Writing an IMU model in C++. Project leads can't make up their mind about what they want so I'm super over it. :/

t-take me to the free beer, loli chan

go look at the last thread

>Moot
who?

n-nani??

Exactly

Who here trying to master the art of dithering?

MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOT

If I am an edge in a graph, how do I achieve maximum possible weight?

>brainlets are confused by brainfuck
[-]>[-]<
>+++++++++[-]

Wow boss called me into the office. I must have just gotten promoted!

>using brainfuck as a edgy retard

kys

eat more

You mean mastering the art of being banned

brainfuck isn't edgy, brainlet. don't get mad just because you don't understand it.

TFW you still call moot for help. 'HE' too busy shagging Boxxy.

>brainlet
>wasting time with brainfuck

hello brainlet

Why is shell so small?

Are you really so stupid that you can't figure it out yourself?

She's the terminal fairy.

Just quit a shit job where I was practically doing everything as a developer.

>customers would just send ideas to my inbox, no discussion in the group
>support desk just forwards tickets to me when they don't know what to do
>infrastructure team constantly asks me about switches and software i'd have no business knowing
>everyone expects me to keep up with every project
>on call constantly
>get called at all hours when databases and servers break, even though we have DBAs and network techs, expected to help troubleshoot
>all deadlines are two weeks after the first meeting about new projects
>everyone assumes every feature is easy to do
>we have WinXP machines on network, serving the public internet
>$55k/year

I'm surprised I didn't blow my brains out, honestly.

I'm going to go find "Business Analcyst" jobs because those fucks did absolutely nothing but generate emails. I'm pretty sure I could find one that I could automate and just sit back and collect a paycheck, play vidya, and jerk off to 2D.

Best esoteric language?

you had me until
>and jerk off to 2D.

you deserve it

dammit, my boss just gave me a handjob

Yes, I don't into moe semiotics. 60cm is very short.

>and jerk off to 2D
You deserve everything you get.

Regular porn is 2D too, anons. :^)

I know the specific mantra with Java, but I'm curious what the software term is for it; ie making a layer that accepts a generic input then spits out exactly what is needed for the target platform but the end process is identical across all platforms.

I want to fuck telma.h!

*blocks javascript's path*

An abstraction.

C += 0.5

literally objective-c

>slips away with async and real threads

What should I learn to retire by 45?

rust

What makes erlangvm so good at concurrency?

Real estate.

how to predict the stock market using twitter emotions analysis

javascript

networking and social skills

elixir

how to pitch your shitty web service to bay area investors

Go

go where?

blockchain technology

That the languages you pick up don't matter.

*except for C++

>I'm looking for something that's in between C and C++
Use the C++ compiler to write C code, occasionally borrowing C++ features.

how the fuck do you even learn this? are there books or courses for this anywhere?

i was memeing, dont do it, its just a hype and its going to die soon leaving you with a dead skill in hand

off topic, I like programming but I don't want to work making programs. How can I use my programing skills in a IT / help desk job? can I make it easier with programing?

Why stop at twitter? A lot of sites (zerohedge, seekingalpha) could be done as well.

look into jobs that can be automated (sysadmin would be one example) and """consultancy""" type intermediary jobs where you find skilled programmers or recommend technology

That's fucking stupid.

>twitter
because thats what most people use

thanks. I will check it out. I don't want to waste the little knowledge I have of programing and get some money of it.

Trips said it. Literally ObjC.

...like you, bitch.

>Rust

>bitch
ouch! you sure showed him

>Go is almost 10 years old
Where has the time gone?

no it's not and fuck you for making me reply and having to solve this shitty captcha

Enjoy waiting 20 seconds for the compiler to work out your 'clever' templates.

Wasted not having generics.