ITT WE PRETEND WE LIVE IN 14TH CENTURY EUROPE

hey exploration fags, if the world is round how come we don't fall off?

Realism: 1
Exploration: 0

>mfw

MEMES

Feels good, man

Gravity

...

>14th century
American education, goddamn

>american education about 14th century

Hey catholic cucks, this "venetian" prank got a little too far don't ya think

>His country didn't exist in the 14th century

> be greek
> get culturally enriched by islam
islam, islam never changes

What is this "Amerika" you're both talking about?

fucking mongols man

nah

lol you look like me now tho
t.baskak

Taking land from mongols has never been this easy..

OCCUPY VENICE

Those merchant Venetians do not comprehend the plight of the peasants.

GET OUT OF MY LANDS
REEEEEEE

>Go outside to find some mushrooms for dinner
>Arrive in the wood
>Two wolves staring at me
>Oh_that_shit_again.png
>Turn 360° and leave
>Forgot I didn't know how to count and end up walking back on the path
>Decide I'll go to the king's wood even if it's forbidden
>Arrive in the wood
>See two poachers
>Hehe, there's money to be made
>Go to see the king and tell him about the poachers
>A fucking BEAR staring at me
>It really isn't my day
>Run like hell
>Throw my basket at the bear
>The stupid animal starts looking for food inside of it
>He doesn't realise I haven't eaten anything in a week
>The stupid cunt
>Manage to leave the wood
>Arrive at the king's castle
>He starts talking to me
>I don't understand shit
>I speak peasant patois
>He already speaks french
>I'm sure he's mocking me
>Decide to leave, but they find an translator
>They ask me what I was doing in the woods in the first place
>Panic
>Start crying like a little bitch
>The king thinks I'm insane
>Throws me to jail
>At least I can eat something
>They serve me mushrooms
>I don't even like mushrooms
>Go back home after a week in jail
>Arrive in the path to my house
>Two wolves staring at me
>Oh_that_shit_again.png

Hipster name for that worthless shithole we discovered 500 years ago.

Back when we were free. Fuck, I've got something in my eye.

>tfw the king wenteth into the grave with nay an heir
t's just the worst

>14th century
>posts post-1648 borders

Mine own misprision, sire.

Andrew III was best king fuck Anjou dynasty!!!

>not having a university
Why is most of Europe so uncivilized?

God sent the Black Death as punishment for your sins!!

REPENT REPENT REPENT REPENT!

But honestly fuck this mongol shithole, brb going to be a free man in the steppes.

hjálpa
vér eðr lífs

>tfw 3 moreta

Everything is great. I just hope we don't get absorbed by some weird islamic horde for half a millennium and the end of the century.

REPENTINGGGGG

Noobs

Did you even kill the dragon?

>Tfw you spend your days posting jests on a Cataian pidgeon message network

Why didn't we REPENT??

WE COULD HAVE PREVENTED THIS!

>heading down to chop some firewood for this winter
>meet my neighbour Halldïr Skallargrimsson
>he's of the antiquated reaver houses
>brawny with naught between his ears
>he starts talking to me
>boasts of his endavours with the local flare brynnhilda
>greatly compliments her teats and speaks further about his stamina
>now showing off his arms in broad daylight
>smile meekly and head on down
>get home at nightfall around 2pm
>my wife, the round and fiesty hildûr with her buttterfaced smile, stares right at me
>chair creaks everytime she blinks
>she's bore me no child these past 3 winters
>forced into our matrimony by the jarl's orders for the the benefit of his new bishop friend
>another cold night now in our small near twig-made bed
>it's tuna with berries for the 16th time in a row, I've been counting
>the gray mash of soup is already cold
>"you were out all day why should i keep the kettle on the fire"
>push her into the fire
>banished to iceland for my crimes
>i regret nothing

Kurwa damn it a jewish merchant sold me a sack of spoiled wheat

I hope one day a great warlord shall be birthed and slaughter all these crooks!

Hey just a question as an outsider


If you guys ever unite do you think britain will ruin it?

DISDAIN FOR VENETIANS

I laugh at the uneducated peasants, living outside of the Holy ROman Empire must suck. Have you tried the new drink from France which our king brought? Tastes like sour shit, I will keep drinking beer desu

I read that France had a huge problem with wolves before their extinction in the 1900's, had an entire government branch dedicated to killing those sons of bitches. I really like that you referenced that.

10/10 would read again.

>Tastes like sour shit


also they keep putting lead in it,supposedly to enhance flavor, do they not know it poisons?

ur late slavshit lmao

Long Live Baphomet! lord of darkness and misery!

SATANAE DIABOLICUS BELIAL ASMODEUS MAGISTERIS SABAOTH MALAK SAMAEL EXPECTO MORITURI STRIGOICA

Now i need babies for finishing the ritual and become a "knight of the Leviathan" in our secret cult inside church.

how is this different from 2000s poland

Flawless

>>Forgot I didn't know how to count and end up walking back on the path

Chuckled

some things never change ;_;

BREAKING NEWS
the finest scientists around have smashed rocks together for the 1000th time today, "we feel that if we keep going, something might happen" said one Yupenke Tonkihuipalki, when asked about whether or not the funding was worth it he went on to say "maybe if we keep smashing rocks we'll find a shape that can roll around" however most scholars remain skeptical as to whether or not the idea of a "circular rock that's easier to move around than square rocks" is even possible to begin with.
please subscribe to the mapuche science cloud signals for more scientific breakthroughs.

The mass grave of plague victims is starting to smell again fml

Wrong time period there bud.

get some jews they learned this strange hygienic magic in cordoba

Europa shalt be dominated by islam
Abak allah

unfortunately no

Oh, it's English vassal again. Let's rob it.

>hey exploration fags, if the world is round how come we don't fall off?

The world was proven to be round by fucking Eratosthenes

these witches aint gonna burn themselves

>be browsing Sup Forums

>see thread after thread about flat earth theory

>starting to believe world is flat

Yeah, it's awful. Beer will forever be the drink for educated gentlemen.

>Holy Roman Empire
>ruled from Prague
Can't make this shit up.

>Anno Dominum MCCCLXXVII
>Not owning your own State

>drink mead near my izba
>got shot with an arrow by a mongol-tatar horse fucker
I think we need to invent some stronger alcohol to cope with this shit

...

Western europeans on suicide watch

>tfw Iberia is not completely reconquered

>Danzig
lol this map is fake there is no such place lol

Guys, I have the feeling that the Holy Roman Empire will unify soon.

Oh boy, i sure love being ruled by these Swedish nobles and German merchants.

>Das heilige Römische reich

>hre
>ruled

>mfw a sami fisher is replying to me

Oh boy, i sure love being ruled by these Danish nobles and German merchants.

Hello my Bohemian friend.
I hope you are not planning to start any religious tumoil, are you?

Kek

Pls buy my fish, i need monies for grain and salt.

>the year of our Lord of 1345
>be me, knight in the service of his majesty Afonso IV
>walking around village
>carrying my dagger, just in case
>going to the blacksmith to pick up my new mace
>walk past young woman
>she spots my dagger and her immediately starts starts shrieking
"Assassin! Call the guards!!!"
>try to explain I'm a knight in the service of his majesty
>she having none of it, starts screaming even louder
>captain of the guard ears commotion and arrives on the scene
"Arrest this assassin!" She tells him
>he recognises me as a knight, we fought together against the Moroccan host in the Battle of Salado
>the good captain lets me go and tells the dumb wench to shut her mouth
>she calls the captain a incompetent buffoon and says that things were much safer under Muslim rule
>the guard executes her for being a Moorish spy

Anyways I got me a brand new mace, can't wait to try it out on a Muslim skull :)

You go, Louis! Fuck those traitorous Neapolitan scum and their whore queen Joanna! Ria Ria HUNGÁRIA!

Whew, we've finally affirmed ourselves as our own sovereign nation after kicking mongols out and defeating hungarians. I sure hope our centuries of misfortune has ended and that nothing bad will happen to us anymore.

good post

inti huasi
garra charrua
kelmes y querandies

>Not becoming friends with the guards and sparring on the weekends

You almost had it.

Hey Prussians bow to your lord

I dont know why that image made me laugh so hard. Holy fuck

wrong century lad
Teutonic Knights are still the boss

>believing in theorists
I'd rather believe facts thank you

It's not theorists you subhuman baboon. The earth's circumference was accurately calculated by 100 BC and learned men of the 14th-15th century knew it. The reason nobody went westward to reach China is because they did not know or guess there was another landmass and they knew ships could not carry enough food to cover that huge of a distance. Only Columbus was retarded enough to try, and he did it because he did the math on his own and got a (wrong) result that said the distance was shorter.

in the name of allah the most merciful the most gracious
all of you shall pay tribute to the Barbary states or we shall raid your coasts, rape your daughters and shit down thine necks

>eurofucks trying to bring their "dead jew on a stick" religion into our lands
>our cuck leaders are encouraging it
fml m8s desu
Perkunas will surely punish us for this

Hello German fellow. Well, maybe Catholic faith should be reformed, it is the CURRENT YEAR after all.

First /v4/ meeting in 1335. F*ck off Vienna. Noice.

Normal day in Bourgeon.

I'd probably say the same because we used to be Muslim before the Spanish.

Christianity please take us!

>born
>2 minutes into life
>ded

Sure can't wait to hunt some wild pigs to bring back to my qt waifu living in a teepee. I'd rather not show up to my tribe's nightly meeting though. Any other Lenape here?

Time for episode 2
>Wake up
>It' sunday
>We're not working today
>I almost slept for 3 whole hours !
>Must go to church
>Hope Cunégonde the qt daughter of the baker will be here
>She is
>Can already feel the sweat going down my hat
>The priest tells us to get in
>Starts the ceremony, he speaks in latin
>I don't speak latin
>Dagobert does
>Cunégonde knows he does
>She sits next to him
>I'm not even listening to the priest anymore
>Sweating so much I must stink
>The priest realises I'm not even listening
>Tells me to stand up and repeat what he just said
>Cunégonde looks at me and chuckle
>I think I look like a rebel or something
>Smiles at her
>Forgot I only got two teeth left
>Her face shows disgust
>Dagobert has 5 teeth left
>The lucky cunt
>The priest tells me that if I don't listen I'll go to hell
>Start sweating even more, I look like I just had a bath
>Implying I ever took one
>Dagobert looks at me with a mocking smile
>He know I'm a 4'5ft short manlet while he's a 4'9 giant
>Cunégonde knows too
>The mass is over
>Start walking back home
>See Cunégonde going with Dagobert
>Go home
>Lay in the pile of straw I use as a bed
>Roll up and cry
>tfw no gf

You can go a bit further than Iceland and after a while you'll land here.

Welcome to Malacca, foreigners. Please buy my ships and steels.