American wants to fap

>American wants to fap
>grabs a bottle of lotion and a sock
>fills the sock with lotion
>yells at his mom to leave him alone for 2 minutes
>puts it on his cock and starts jerking it

Why?

Other urls found in this thread:

youtube.com/watch?v=OhJQVVAN2Ho
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>Mum found the cum towel

checked and fapped

Why not?

Yes goyim keep buying the Geldgreif Original™ lotion and don't forget to get your wife sons circumcised.
You don't want their little schnidle to fall off, do you?

youtube.com/watch?v=OhJQVVAN2Ho
>German wants to fap
>takes his tiger plushie that he's had for all his life
>cuts a hole in the back and stuffs a fleshlight in it
>fucks it
Why?

Wow I have to try that technique

why do americans wear shoes when they fap?

...

lmao

>mfw that guy probably browses Sup Forums
>mfw there's shit tons of people like him around here in their containment boards

Well, there is /mlp/

Jüst fick my scheisse up!

>Canadian wants to Fap
>Goes to get a hockey stick
>Puts on beanie and parka
>Walks into the snow and glaciers
>finds seal cub
>Beats it to death
>Commits necrophilia and fucks it
>That's why the fur's white

Why?

We don't.
We do sometimes wear socks though, to keep our feet warm while we fap for maximum comfort.

NO FORESKIN
O

N
E
R
V
E
S

It feels good feeling my sexuality the way nature wanted me to explore it.

>Canadians pretending they're not Americans
When will this meme die?

Gee, some people really can't handle their shit.

If that was my son, I'd just laugh at him and call him autistic.

What the fuck I hate Germany now

Scat is one level of disgusting
But this there's no coming back from this

If some chick's mother found out about her collection of dragon dildos and oversized buttplugs the result would be lighhearted conversation about geting a boyfriend...

I would leave and cry my eyes out come back all fucked up at night and start the disowning process in the morning

kek

Or the mother would ask to buy one sometime with the daughter.
>NO MOM BUY YOUR OWN

ayy

man i always wanted to go to tropical island

No, the equivalent would be strapping a dildo onto a horse plushie.

>the way nature wanted me to explore it
By yourself?

>world's prison state
>freedom!!

>did not exist anywhere in the world pre-1950
>we did a thing in ww1/2!!

>puts hormones in milk, diabetes in burgers, wood in walls and doors, has illiterate and physically and mentally untrained police forces
>thinks its not a 3rd world shithole

>racemixed to hell and back, basically brasil lite, mixed so hard it can not even comprehend ethnicities anymore so it just calls people 'white'
>calls itself racist 24/7

>cuts dick
>?????

fuck is going on over there, this is some alice in wonderland type of shit but you never get to snap out of it at the end

I'm american and I have never fapped like that. I am fairly certain you are misinformed my fellow American.

Uncut American here

And no I'm not Jewish

>god loves you but you can't do this

Wew, wasn't germany supposed to be first world?

But what if it's the dad who finds the collection? I would be horrified to find that t.b.h.

DELETE THIS

keke

I honestly never understand why someone would use their sock instead of a fucking tissue.

this guy is probably masturbating to zootopia porn as i watch this video

What is this thing?

...

american biological female
believe it or not they even have females that are not biological females

the fuck is that
I mean I have an idea of what that is but I still want to be sure.

>believe it or not they even have females that are not biological females
god bless

If "he" were my son I would invoke the ius vitae ac necis every paterfamilias have and kill "him" with my bare hands

Then I'd probably kill my wife, since she totally failed as mother, and eventually myself, since probably my semen is ill

I can stand scat, faggots, pissing, goatfucking
But a grown man (old enough to eventually live alone while his parents are on a vacation) fucking a plushie - and being proud of it - and being so disrespectful and calm like a perfect psychopath.. also recording and sharing that discussion with her mother.. that is the hallmark of a failure that shall be washed with blood

Not even joking

It's a t-shirt the guy used to jerk off in for years and never washed. His mom finally found it and demanded he throw it out. He took some keepsake photos before getting rid of it.

t. Gianluigi Rizzoli

That's what I thought.
Can you imagine how that shit smelled like?

why boner

What the fuck, I love Germany now!

I fell in love in 10 seconds.

Woah.

>Emma Roberts

u wot.

Hitler wouldn't have accepted this

Looks like a guy.

Someone show this to /mlp/

>German """""""""""""""""""""""people """""""""""""""""""""""

...

>black cock only
This is animal cruelty.

4u

Oh sh--!