I WANT

I WANT
A FUCKING
GIRLFRIEND

I SWEAR TO GOD I CAN'T FUCKING TAKE IT ANYMORE I'M ABOUT TO FUCKING EXPLODE WITH THE ACCUMULATED FORCE OF EACH AND EVERY SOLEMN NIGHT I'VE SPENT ALONE IN MY FUCKING ROOM WITHOUT COMFORT OR KIN, UTTERLY ALONE WITH ONLY ME MYSELF AND I AND

NO
FUCKING
GIRLFRIEND

I WANT A GIRLFRIEND NOW I'M TIRED OF NOT HAVING A GIRLFRIEND WHERE IS MY GIRLFRIEND WHY DO I ALWAYS NEVER HAVE A FUCKING GIRLFRIEND

THE NEXT TIME I PASS SOME STUPID SMUG IN-LOVE COUPLE ON THE SIDEWALK, PEOPLE WILL DIE

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

what have u done to get a girlfriend in the last month tho?

>SIDEWALK

nice try, lardo

go earn money to buy a gf, idiot.

Don't bother, women are whores. Just stay home and sleep it off.

Buy a fleshlight

check em

Calm down, you stupid aussie shit.

You need to relax with my pics. Here, I hope it will cure you.

I feel stupid for not understanding this chart

Who here ready for wizard revolution?

go to google
type in "[your town] brothel"
go to said brothel and spend your textbook money on a root

Me. Genocide of white woman is coming.

It says that you have no chance.

What if you're in the top 20% of men?

It's not hard to be

I've been thinking about it for several years and it's not practical to have a gf. Let's emulate it: I have a gf but I need time and money to spend on her. I only have about 5 hours a day(and I don't work right now) I ready to waste but the thing is I also need money which means I have to work and those 5 hours I am wasting on work. Moreover I don't want to work.
As we can see it's not practical because you have to spend your productive time on gf or work

It's hard if you're a subhuman kangaroo fucker like OP.

Well dying a virgin at least isn't very likely

Pic related

It's hard if you are not

1. Tall
2. Muscular
3. Tanned
4. Blue-eyed
5. with tiny penis (

So you're trying to say the only people who get laid are all of those?

That's weird then, the vast majority of people are not that.

>Tiny penis
Average penis is like 14cm, everything that isn't a fake penis used in porn is tiny?

If i got a gf, you can have one too.

I'm trying to say if you wanna fuck really good looking girl you need to be with all of those menitioned features. Otherwise you deserve an ugly manlet landwhale.

Not really.

It's very easy to become 7/10 as a man(or woman for that matter).

>Go to the gym and have some muscle mass with relatively low bodyfat
>Get a good haircut that suits your face
>Have good facial hair that compliments your face
>Wear nice clothes that fit you well
>Fix your acne with accutane if you have it

Unless you have a physical deformity that puts you at least 7/10 and you'll look really good compared to the average slob outside.

>You need to do all of those just for putting you dick into a meathole for having 3 seconds of pleasure.
>Even if you do those things the chance that you will get a gf isn't much high
Meanwhile some guys (7/10) who didn't do any of those gyms/clothes/whatever fuck cute girls without any problems daily.
Overpayment as is.

>Meanwhile some guys (7/10) who didn't do any of those gyms/clothes/whatever fuck cute girls without any problems daily.

So?

Meanwhile some guys are born with a $100 million dollars because their dad is rich. Why does it matter what other people have?

>>Even if you do those things the chance that you will get a gf isn't much high

Where the fuck are you living exactly?

Pretty much every person you see on the street, no matter how ugly or weird looking PROBABLY has had at least one girlfriend, if not more. Everyone is having sex and has girlfriends these days, it's not rare or admirable in any way

Beta uprising soon

if you want one that badly just date a fat chick

Are you the same Canadian that always posts the workout threads and bettering yourself threads?

Keep up the good work

Every girl has her own price. And that price means that you should invest money into yourself otherwise you can't get that girl.

That's why virginity among males exists because basically girls nowadays are prostitutes in closet with invisible price-list.

y-yes

>And that price means that you should invest money into yourself otherwise you can't get that girl.

What? Looking good in turn makes you feel good. Self-improvement isn't done for other people specifically but getting attention from girls (and men) is a very nice side-effect.

having a good body and wearing nice clothes makes people AUTOMATICALLY look at you like the boss of wherever you are. You appear to know what you're doing and thus have a commanding presence

>putting you dick into a meathole for having 3 seconds of pleasure.
now I know why you have no gf

Items you forgot to list:
>be charismatic(whatever the fuck it is)
>be humorous
>be interesting in conversations
>be rich
Looks without pereonality ain't nothin'
And while you have to work your ass off achieving all of this Chad was already born with it and got gfs efortlessly all throughout his life.

>Self-improvement isn't done for other people
>but getting attention from girls (and men) is a very nice side-effect.
That's some nice contradiction you got here.
>having a good body and wearing nice clothes makes people AUTOMATICALLY look at you like the boss of wherever you are.
Ok seems like it's time to stop talking with some PUA fanatic.

>Thinking it's just about sex

>And while you have to work your ass off achieving all of this Chad was already born with it and got gfs efortlessly all throughout his life

How do you know Chad didn't put in the effort?

How do you know Chad wasn't the same /r9k/ beta who made an effort to better himself and stopped making excuses and feeling sorry for his results in life and actually BECAME the person women like?

Keep crying about "chads" and why you have no gf

take a trip to russia and find a russian gf then marry her and take her to australia,often people in western europe do this

I'm none of those first 4 and still get laid. You just aren't trying, Ivan.

>>be charismatic(whatever the fuck it is)
Not being an autist, yes
>>be humorous
yes, not having a monotone or deadpan voice where it's like you're narrating a book is important
>>be interesting in conversations
Who would want to be around a boring loser who can't talk for 5 minutes and keep you engaged?
>>be rich

Most people aren't rich, but obviously you need to be rich to get a gf/get laid. I guess that makes sense, I guess only the millionaires are having sex

why your name is zitto animale, are you italian?

You're that insufferable whiny faggot who posts all day long on /r9k/ about how he can't get girls because of his height, aren't you?

Forgot to take off my "bully japanese" name

>Here's some things you can do to look better which will help you overall in life, but specifically with getting laid in this case

>"What? No I don't want to do that because a character I made up in my head called Chad doesn't have to do any of that and he gets laid"

I thought russians were alpha

>How do you know Chad wasn't the same /r9k/ beta who made an effort to better himself and stopped making excuses and feeling sorry for his results in life and actually BECAME the person women like?
Elliot tried this, didn't work out too well for him
Once beta forever beta, that's just nature

you're a guy which makes you self-sufficient enough already

get some friends instead

It's no use trying to talk to him. He has long since chosen to be a failure and no facts will convince him. He will not want to put in any effort into anything because he thinks Chad exists and was born that way and never made an effort in his life because he was given everything for free.

He's mentally ill.

Wanna see your arguments in reality?

>Hey!
>Are you an ugly Sup Forums dweller?
>Are you a virgin?
>And you want to have a gf, don't you?
>Then you need to do some things!
>Go to the gym! After 5 years of using steroids and other stupid shit like protheine you will become from Auschwitz-tier to the Skinnyfat-tier!
>Go to the store! Waste another loads of cash for clothes which are trendy but not really fit for you!
>Then go to the barbershop.
>Then go to the nearest car-center and buy a cool car
>In total; you spent 56789$ to get a gf
>Congratulations!
>Finally you might have a chance to get a fucking gf! The chance is not so high but be optimistic!

>Elliot tried this, didn't work out too well for him

Elliot never tried this though.

Elliot Rodger was good looking (above average) and very rich. But he thought that girls were just going to come up to him and have sex with him, he never actually ever tried to talk to girls.

I'm not even misogynistic or any of this shit but having one is just too much effort to me at this point
It'd demand such a huge social (learning how to chitchat, forcing myself to go to places, learning to be fun to be around, etc..) and physical investment (going to gym, having good sleep nights, undergoing surgery for pectus scavatum, etc... ) I honestly wouldn't know where to begin, and I'm already 26 with a joyless job, lots of coworkers and no friends.

Ofc I'm not trying, Mehmet.

>Elliot tried

Do you actually believe your own lies or are you as retarded as Elliot?

lol

I have no respect for you if you sit around wallowing in self-pity moaning on imageboards about how bad your life is instead of cracking on and turning things around. It's like a man stuck in a hole who, instead of trying to find a way to climb out, bafflingly starts digging the hole deeper and deeper because he's too scared he'll fall during the climb

Sort your appearance out (haircut, skin, weight, muscles, clothes. This can be done in a few months, is cheap/free and is the absolutely vital first step)

And then sort your life out (job, car, gf, in that order, they're all a piece of piss once you've got the momentum going)

It's that fucking easy

Just fucking do it you waste of life

post vocaroo

I had a choice to make last Friday night. Stay home and fap to Chinese cartoons or go out. I went out. Ended up getting pussy.

You chose to fap to animu.

I know you're just going to make strawman arguments and refuse ANY ADVICE That you get no matter how sensible it is but I'll respond because i'm bored and i can't fall asleep.

>>Go to the gym! After 5 years of using steroids and other stupid shit like protheine you will become from Auschwitz-tier to the Skinnyfat-tier!

Where are you even getting this from?

>>Go to the store! Waste another loads of cash for clothes which are trendy but not really fit for you!
I said clothes that FIT YOU. I don't get why you wouldn't want to look good.

>>Then go to the barbershop.

You can cut your own hair. I said a haircut that looks good and fits you.

Personally i cut my own hair and I've had no problems or complaints.

>>Then go to the nearest car-center and buy a cool car
Never said that

>>Finally you might have a chance to get a fucking gf! The chance is not so high but be optimistic!
Ok, then don't do anything and sit at home masturbating to anime if you're just going to refuse any advice

>Sort your appearance out (haircut, skin, weight, muscles, clothes. This can be done in a few months, is cheap/free and is the absolutely vital first step)

b-b-b-but that's too hard... Chad doesn't have to do that...

Have you ever been in the bottom of such hole?
By the time/effort estimations in your post I bet you've never been there

Advice? What the fuck? Because all of your advices can be shortened to

>just spend some monies for this and that

>By the time/effort estimations in your post I bet you've never been there

It's no excuse not to try.

Look at it this way, 2 years is going to pass no matter what happens. You can spend those two years either on Sup Forums and watching porn all day or you can fix your life

Getting new clothes, going to the gym and getting a haircut isn't expensive

But you'll make excuses no matter what anyone says, so why bother?

Good luck with alimonies and property division, Mehmet ;)

I heard that Schweiz has loads of feminazistic laws when it comes for divorce.

All your """"advices"""" summarized in one picture(you don't need a translation to get the idea)
Kys

It's true. Chad was since birth destined to have everything handed to him. Like his millionaire CEO job at a company he himself founded, it was set up for him when he was a baby already.

Are you one of those turbovirgins who thinks sex outside marriage doesn't exist?

It all can be shortened to

>stop being a whiny faggot and do something, go outside

>SIDEWALK
Better luck next time leafyboi

All your posts summed up are "I want a gf really badly, it's not fair. But I don't want to do anything for it, why should I have to improve myself or make any sort of effort? I am entitled to a gf"

You're just making strawmen not backed up by anything. Everyone who has sex is a chad who never had to work, right?

It exists. But false-rape alarms exist too, Ahmed ;)

Have you ever been in the bottom of the hole?
Are you a guy?
Just answer me those two things please

Big cock? If no, then sorry.

>try to get a gf
>practice talking with literally everyone so i dont sound thirsty including dudes,women kids,whatever
>get a job
>lose weight
>practice a sport
>do okay in university

im only getting more depressed for some reason even whem im supposedly getting me shit together.

>still no gf
i want affection like a normal person for god sake

NOW

>How do you know Chad wasn't the same /r9k/ beta who made an effort to better himself and stopped making excuses and feeling sorry for his results in life and actually BECAME the person women like?
Although is possible for a beta to become an alpha, is not the same, as he knows what being a beta is and he is forever resented with the society that once forsake him but now accepts him.
To accept that is to accept how shallow society is.

Depends what you mean by 'bottom of the hole'

>Although is possible for a beta to become an alpha

I don't understand why you people think learning social skills and get in shape. It's very easy like I pointed out above, if you just do all of those you automatically become above average, as long as you don't sperg out and have a basic grasp of social skills

>1. Tall
Yey. 6'2"
>2. Muscular
Nope
>3. Tanned
Pale as death
>4. Blue-eyed
Green (fugg)
>5. with tiny penis (7. Cuckold
It isn't even possible to cuck me if I'm a kissless virgin.

>it's THAT easy, trust me :^)
You also forgot to mention that being yourself is the most crucial point

>Pale as death
IKTF

If I have bright blue eyes is staying pale a good idea?

how can neets get gfs?

>>it's THAT easy, trust me :^)

Which step of what I said is hard to do? It really is that easy

>You also forgot to mention that being yourself is the most crucial point
You shouldn't be yourself, you should improve yourself and be that.

WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEW LADS I YELL THIS REALLY LAD IN MY APARTMENT COMLPLEX AT 2AM WHILE I SURVIVE ON ON US GOV. BRAND LOAN MONEY I'LL NEVER BE ABLE TO PAY BACK

He wants you to be deep in his manhole.

Having low-body fat body and improve it from skeleton-tier to a normal shape-tier is much harder than losing weight, you fucking leaf. Especially if you are older than 25.

>tfw no chink gf

All you virgins in this have literally 0 reason to be virgins. Go outside and talk to girls. Do it. Use pokemon go as socializer.

>put on two bottles of ultra SPF sunscreen
>stick finger under UV lamp
>whatsthatsizzlingsound.pdf
tfw

>Having low-body fat body and improve it from skeleton-tier to a normal shape-tier is much harder than losing weight

No it isn't you just need to eat more.

>Especially if you are older than 25.
Your age has nothing to do with it

>need to eat more
Yeah, like 9000 times per day, right?

Buy one from Russia

No you just need to eat more calories than you consume to gain weight

>My parents are rich but I don't want or recieve money from them.
I'm not the only one who thinks like this then!!!
The only difference is that my parents are poor...

Eventually you'll either change for the better or you stop caring and move on. I'm sure it'll be the latter

>implying we all have money
>implying you wouldnt tell the difference

>Which step of what I said is hard to do?
Becoming the life of the party when you have been a cringey sperglord all your life. That's basically what you're suggesting when you say about improving social skills at the drop of the hat.

>implying Russian women are expensive

>That's basically what you're suggesting when you say about improving social skills at the drop of the hat

I never even said that. I told you to improve your appearance first of all but you kept making shitty memes about "needing steroids", "needing to be a millionaire" and some other dumb excuses.

>Becoming the life of the party
You don't have to become the life of the party to have sex once in a while or get a gf. You're so out of touch with reality it's ridiculous

>tfw plenty of tinder matches
>conversation always fizzles out after a few messages or they don't even respond in the first place

Good lad. I'm basically a poorfag now, but I'm proud of where I'm going.

>tfw moderately tall (6" or 183cm)
>tfw in good shape (weightlifting, cardio)
>tfw not that ugly (no acne, no glasses, no deformations)
>tfw still no gf

I must be really autistic or I don't know

>>tfw still no gf
How often do you talk to girls