Tell me everything there is to know about Portugal. The history, the language, the culture, I want to know it all

Tell me everything there is to know about Portugal. The history, the language, the culture, I want to know it all.

>inb4 alberto

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youtube.com/watch?v=dcFAcjXZKWY.
youtube.com/watch?v=_nZe7EBxcYc
youtube.com/watch?v=U2pPSAAFSbk
browser.1000genomes.org/Homo_sapiens/Variation/Population?db=core;r=5:33950616-33951616;v=rs35397;vdb=variation;vf=26069#102184_tablePanel
portuguesephenotype.blogspot.pt/
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prime minister of portugal

>pardotugal

Pic related guy has some nig ancestry and he looks whiter.

they speak portuguese

hes goan but whiter than every turklet

N I G G A

He's not pardo, he's indian.

...

best ally, there isn't much more you need to know as a Britcuck

>white boys
it says right there man, how can you not read it

>white boys

What did she mean by this

nigga pls

black and proud

Still more white than turks.

Incomplete map.

d-don't forget madeira familia

Best weather in Europe, great food and people, amazing natural wonders and architecture, rich history and culture and all with no rapefugees. Also shitty economy. It's extremely memed and underrated but keep in mind that Portugal isn't Lisbon


t. portuguese

Of course friend. Really admire Madeira.

europeans think like this ? really
ahahahha
west turkey whiter than south italia, portugal greece

>whiter than south italia, portugal greece

only greece. they are literally christian arabs.

>CHÜVA
>NÖTE
Azorian people speak like French autists, they're not Barbosa worthy

niye muhalefet oluyon şerefini siktiğim

they were your best allies agaisnt spain in the past.

they are good boys and with a nice culture, but a inferior complex about spain, they hate us.

He doesn't know about the very different accents in different islands.

No we don't you gypsy

Brazilians are whiter than Turks.

yes :(

but i love you the same. im galician

Why are your birds so god damn loud?

I went there once and I couldn't sleep because there was a bunch of fucking witches screaming all night.

It sounds retarded on every island tbqh, and I only hear about this kind of accent only when RTP is talking about floods destroying the archipelago. At least Madeirenses are understandable to some point

if you had been in usa you could shooted them

Mating season? Where did you go?

I live in a liberal enclave

Porto.

Why?

There's nothing to know. It sucks. It's been mostly ruled by mediocre people without any sort of vision and the people is dumb because elects mediocre people.

Yeah Porto has a lot of seagulls. That's bound to happen in port cities though.

How did you like it besides the noise?

Because of the way they've been able to progress economically since the region became autonomous.

Also, how good they are at separating tourists from their euros.

Which are both almost the same tbqh.

t, Azorian

Don't be disheartened. Look around. Nobody likes their political class these days.

t. Alberto Medeiros

Just a fellow islander my mainlander friend.

My family's from there. What do you think of the Azorean diaspora?

They colonized a lot of shit and traded with the Japanese.

I was just joking about you all being called Medeiros. Most Azorian people I met were pretty cool. Same for Madeira.

I found it charming that they had seen more whales than trains before. In fact, they had never seen a train before. Which is weird to me because I live by a track so I hear them every day.

I've always wanted to visit. It has more things to see per area than the mainland. Looks beautiful.

VOCÉ É BEM GRANDE

>Because of the way they've been able to progress economically since the region became autonomous.
Literally only happened since tourism exploded and especially since the EU started sending money to the islands

AYO HOL UP

Beautiful. Would again. Less thieves than Spain.

Everyone here has family who emigrated, mainly to the US, including me.

I also have a couple of great-uncles who went to Canada.

The diaspora is alright, most that I have met have been pretty ok, there are the ocasional try hard annoying show-offs, but then again we also have those amog those who live here, so...

But they have been able to explore that touristic potential and put the EU monies to some, at least somewhat productive, use.

Yep, but Portugal is in Europe and EU, and you?

:^)

Yup, I remember the first time I saw a train the first time I went to the mainland when I was 7.

Was pretty cool.

...

History:
>These Asturian kingdoms are taking too long to kick off the Moors. Fuck off Castille/Leon, we're Portugal now, and we have no breaks.
>Out of our way, Moors, but leave your qt's behind to repopulate the South with brown christians.
>Fucking Spain keeps barging in 5 to 1. Fuck off we're full. Yo, England, come and play hit the Spaniards.
>This shit is boring and the Spaniards stink, lets go to the sea.
>Holly fucking shit this is amazing, and we kick ass at it
>Fucking Spain is following us in copied ships. Fuck off, Spain. Yo England, Come and play hit the Spaniards 2: Armadas
>Brazil and Africa and India is ours, shit is great, food is great, science and art is booming, cucked the Jews and their trade and Portugal is BEST COUNTRY in Europe. Spaniards and English and Dutch are lagging behind
>The Ocean speaks Luso

All dowhill from here:
>Shit king decides to attack the Moors in their homeland and loses the Army and noblemen.
>Spain gets hold of crown, under-funds and divides our armada, lose Indian territories to the Dutch and the Armada to the Brits
>Fucking enough, Spain. We're back at being Portugal, bring your army 4 to 1 and get your ass kicked.
>Earthquake destroys half our GDP.
>Spain invades again, Brits help us kick them out again (4 to 1). English discipline and Portuguese Bravery literally destroy their army (using peasants, women and children in the North) and their chances to come against Napoleon and the colonies.
>Napoleon comes back, Britain helps again, Portugal is the only western country to be able to beat the French.
>Brazil leaves.
>Can't afford to pay for industrial revolution, can't get rich again, Brits tell us we can't keep some land in Africa (which we couldn't)
>Crisis, Republic,
>Crisis, Right-wing regime
>Cash is flowing in, but the population is being stupified and censored
>Coup, left-wing comes with force, military sort of controls it, but crisis again.

Fuck. At least we don't speak Spanish. Thank you Brits

English vassal since time memorial

Not really. Until 1578 we were the top and more prosperous country. They did help us in some battles (just a few hundred soldiers here and there) but the biggest help was the trade of Crown blood to keep the Spaniards and French away from each other's thrones.

From 1560 to 1640 the Spaniards held our throne and we were enemies (although the Portuguese captains refused to fight against the Brits, and we lost our ships). After that the good relations kept going and we did okay. And until the mid 1700's we were doing fine again if it weren't for a massive earthquake that fucking ruined us.

From then on yeah, we we're the Brits' old disabled buddy and were mostly following. We still kept exchanging royalty and introduced them to tea through it.

Fairly worth it, desu, at least we kept our identity and weren't fucked over by the Spaniards like Catalunia and the Basque Country, or betrayed by the French like Spain as a whole was.

>Introduced us to tea

Now I understand why we're the oldest allies on the planet

I live in a port city in the US actually.

I think your seagulls have a pact with Satan.
Fuck, a hawk lives on the roof of my building and its yelling has nothing on your birds.

Ayo hol up

That only came much later.

I think that originally you sent a couple of Crusaders to help with the reconquista and relay info to the pope.

After that, during our dinastic crisis you got us 100 archers to help with the Spanish Invasion (which had French cavalry support), so we used you to force them into trying to flank us and kill themselves into hidden spikes. (1383)

This was when the alliance officially started. The crowns intermingled. The "golden generation" which included Infante D. Henry who basically started the discoveries, were like 5 or 6 brothers of a Portuguese father (John I) and English mother (Phillipa of Lancastre), 4 of which basically put Portugal on the path to being the bleeding edge of Europe.

About 2 centuries later, since we had exclusive maritime contact with China and Japan we brough tea and our noblemen started drinking it, and an Portuguese princess (Catarina de Bragança) married your king (Charles II)and brought tea with her (as was our tradition), which propagated throughout your aristocracy and the rest is history.

TL;DR what actually united us was the mutual hatred for Spain and France.

kek. Angry cunts they are, that's for sure.

I'm in Portugal (postdoc) till middle of October but then I'll have some time off and I was thinking of visiting either Azores or Madeira. What's the weather like on Azores in October? What would you recommend to visit in Azores? What about Madeira?

t. temporary Alberto

>What's the weather like on Azores in October?
Literally the same as every day of the year: unpredictable and cycles through every season in a 48-hour span. Always 23º C.

Don't know about places to visit though, since I'm a mainlander.

New Salazar when? Also what should an American who's learning Portuguese know about studying abroad in your country?

ah, I thought you were t. Alberto Ilhação

Why Portuguese? Not hating, just curious.

There's a large Brazilian population where I'm from and I've always wanted to study in Portugal.

Do you really believe all this crap?Also you shoul check a history book first also check >english counter armada and see who kicked who

Florida?

AY YO HOL UP

...

SO U BE SAYIN

There was one here somewhere. Maybe he went away.

Heh, American uni education is frankly better. We actually have a bunch of good Universities, but what you study will dictate which uni you should go to. Coimbra should be about the best cultural experience, but it's by no means the best University at everything. Law and Medicine are GOAT, STEM are great but probably not the best apart from some select paths.

This is an example of the end of the year serenade in Coimbra, where everyone dresses the uniform and says goodbye to the best times of their lifes, traditionally: youtube.com/watch?v=dcFAcjXZKWY. Looks up "Queima das Fitas" and "Praxe Académica" for more details.

It's a nice easy going country, but I don't know how a foreigner would pay for it. Bachelor's degrees cost us 1000€ a year, but foreigners always pay the same thing they would in their own EU country. Americans may have to pay more.

Learning Portuguese is good, but if any foreigner is in class the teacher has to speak in English if you're in STEM. Just about everyone below 35 speaks English (better than most central Europe but worse than Scandinavia).

You should feel safe and welcome just about anywhere, though.

>New Salazar
We need someone who genuinely loves the country as much as he did, but who isn't so paranoid and authoritarian. He was way too much and fucked a lot of the country over in order to progress it's economy. Most people hate him now, but also hate what his void left us with. He's generaly understood to be a very serious man.

kek. Give back our flag.

DAT WE WUZ

youtube.com/watch?v=_nZe7EBxcYc

KANGS N SHIET

Kek. That was a response to a rather cringy video some dude made here:

youtube.com/watch?v=U2pPSAAFSbk

It keeps falling in the trap of over-romanticising the Football culture, and forgetting the real good things we did, but the ending is particularly well suited for Finland.

Shut up, Brit, you'd be nothing without our tea.

>that video
I miss the time when the biggest international problems on my mind were related to countries having denbts.

Yeah.

I heard that since Nokia's slight decline you have been having some financial trouble as of late. Is this accurate?

>Just about everyone below 35 speaks English (better than most central Europe but worse than Scandinavia

Disagree, the level of English here is still poor, even among students.

I've had the opposite experience.

Are you a local? Where are you from?

Does the average Portuguese person consider themselves as white? I was in Portugal a couple of years ago and I would say at best maybe 1/5 or 1/6 would pass as white here.

Yes we consider ourselves white.
And what is white in norway?blue eyes and blonde hair?

People just don't care that much if you're white or black.
But if you're black people will suspect more about what you'll possibly do.

is it easy to hypothetically buy cocaine off the street in portugal

Nope, only if you know someone who sells.

Just average white I guess. But for example, I don't think any of these people are white, I guess they are in Portugal.

Nope, I'm Czech. I have been postdoc in Porto for 15 months.
I guess it's tricky to estimate the English proficiency level but I can tell you from my own experience that it's not hard to find students who speak 0 English and a lot of them speak it very very poorly. Also, fixing any bureaucratic stuff have been nightmare for me as literally nobody spoke any English at all. Aside from that, it's lovely, very comfy country.

*white or brown.

You have to understand that Portugal and southern europe have a very popular beach culture, which means most people like to be tanned because, in their eyes, it's sexier or more exotic

What do you think of the french national team then?

Yeah. Memes aside, we just generally tan easily. Most old people get that orangey leathery look, but they are usually pale in their unexposed areas. Figo there is almost brown, but he's actually a pale dude if he stays out of the sun. We've evolved to turn brown instead of red, and we love to go to the beach.

We obviously have some Moorish genes from long ago when we raped their women, so we have big noses and better hairlines and hair than you guys do up there, generally speaking.

The further up North you go, the more white. Lisbon is the exception in that it's darker than it's surrounding areas because it's an immigration hub from the African colonies.

I've had some black dude try to sell me some, very politely and friendly oddly enough. I suspect it was flour, though. Selling is still illegal here, so maybe try your luck somewhere else. We're not the drug central we were in the early 90's. Decriminalisation solved it.

Maybe it's where I'm from then. Bureaucracy offices seem to be required by law to be as inefficient as possible, though, so that checks out.

White people who tan look orange, not brown.

If you go everyday during one month to the beach you'll not be orange.

Is white = skin color only to you? Well, you're kinda right about it if so because Iberians are indeed the darkest Europeans in terms of natural skin color going by studies on the frequencies of the allele responsible for light pigmentation in Europeans: browser.1000genomes.org/Homo_sapiens/Variation/Population?db=core;r=5:33950616-33951616;v=rs35397;vdb=variation;vf=26069#102184_tablePanel

Portugal may or may not be darker than Spain on average. The sample in that one is from Spain only.

That's because Nords use spray tan.

Also, you're seriously underestimating the time these 'stars' spend on the beach just to look like that.

I'm sure it will only get better. Offices seem to be really really inefficient but people there also tends to be nice and really try to help. At least that was my experience. So at the end, it all somehow works out. Also, google translate solved a lot of problems.

>better hairlines

Hey man that's not cool, I am balding.

Jokes aside, I was just fucking around in this thread. Seems the Portuguese are a lot less butthurt about this topic then the Greeks, I'll stick to Greek-baiting from now on.

50% or more of the spanish population doesn't live in the coast
90% of the portuguese population lives in the coast
There's alot more portuguese going to the beach in percentage wise.We're whiter naturally tho

I don't know. I would need to see a pic like this for Portugal and Spain. Tuscans do look pretty white to me. They are shown as having higher values for the allele than Finns and Brits in that study.

>Seems the Portuguese are a lot less butthurt about this topic
Heh. It's undeniable we have Moor genes. The misconception that we were raped by the Muslims is wrong though, as those rapebabies were kicked off during the Reconquista with their parents, and in turn we raped them to populate the south, which is why they are browner.

We have less melanoma deaths than you guys up there, even though we have a lot more sun, so there's natural selection at play here.

We are also one of the most peaceful countries in the world, despite our "lower class" genes, so take that as you will. We still fought in the white side and our brownness is a veteran scar.

Certainly did a better fucking job than the Swedes, Danes and Franks are doing.

They had moors for +200 years than we did in the south. We finished reconquista by 1260, and they only finised in 1450 or something like that.

portuguesephenotype.blogspot.pt/

have fun

we didn't rape them at all,visigoths were already pretty brown...
The suebis on the other hand...