Anyone else here do tech support?

Anyone else here do tech support?

What's the stupidest call you've ever taken?

Pic related.

I read the picture and understood what was going on, yet I still want you to explain it to me

I used to do tech support. cant remember the stupidest call/chat/ticket but one of them was the customer wanting to install php 7 on their vps and somehow ended up dropping some mysql databases and uninstalling their plesk control panel. and blaming us of course.

>Customer called
>Was greeted, being told it was tech support
>Complains that his left foot is swollen
>wants me to do something about it.
>told him we help with computer problems
>recommended he contact healthcare provider
>he doesn't want to call healthcare provider, wants me to fix it
>advised him, again, we can fix broken computers
>told him to call 911.
>he realized, after choosing prompts for tech support, being told he'd called tech support, and being on the phone for almost 2 minutes, we couldn't help with his foot, and hung up

This is, honestly, about 'average intelligence' for people that call tech support. If you wonder why you're told to turn it of and on again, it's because a lot of calls are about like this.

Kek

I used to do it, at a call center. First supporting iPaqs, next place was providing support and selling technical service contracts at a large computer manufacturer. People would call in and be told their $400 computer doesn't include support (not understanding this is why it costs $400), and that if they want me to clean their malware infection, they need to pay $90 to get support for three technical issues. That job was hell. And you're right about the average intelligence level of a caller. Some of the worst I remember

>random lady calls in
>can't remember the issue she had
>ask her if she's on her desktop, she says yes
>tell her to press the start button
>she shoots back microseconds later "I don't have that"
>spend a few seconds giving visual cues to slowly draw her eyes to the start button
>oh, i see it now

>some laquanda from NY calls in
>in the ghettoest accent imaginable, no hello, nothing, that her limewire isn't working
>give her a spiel about how we can't help provide support for software intended to pirate, bla bla bla
>told her she'd have to buy a service contract anyways
>she hangs up

>white guy from new yawk with that stereotypical accent calls in
>throughout the call his daughter is pestering him, asking for help with her homework. she's really young, probably 1st or 2nd grade.
>"daddy, i need help with my homework"
>dad excuses himself for a moment "ok what do you need to do, honey?"
>"I have to use all these words in a sentence"
>"umm, okay sweetie. why dont you...go find one of your books and look for sentences with those words in them. you normally shouldn't do that, but this time it's ok"
>god bless america

1/2

When I started out I had someone call the helpdesk insisting it was their car insurance companies number, that was 2 minutes of fun but an afternoon of laughter.

Ever wonder how they do other stuff? Like... dressing themselves?

I picture them:
>Standing there
>in tighty whities
>shoe on head
>pants on arms
>calling levi jeans support
>because they're not working right
>wrangler jeans

>lady calls in
>completely incomprehensible
>she sounds like Mrs. Swan from madtv, only even more inscrutable
>just keeps rambling on and on
>have no idea what she's saying, I'm just saying "uhuh, okay"
>put her on mute to express my anger, say "SHUT UP!" in a guttural growl
>"excuse me, did you just tell me to shut up?"
>fuck, missed the mute button
>quickly make up an excuse that I was talking to my coworker beside me because he was talking too loud
>said there was a lot of crosstalk on the headsets
>she says "ok...", totally buys the story and continues mumbling
>decide there's no way I can do anything
>look at her file and see she has no support contract, but another department might help her for free with her model
>shunt her off, heave a sigh of relief
>tell a level 2 dude I was cool with about it right after the call, cause I don't want to get audited for it
>he says he'll just listen to the call, that way it'll be marked and won't get audited
>we listen to the call, he's laughing his ass off
>makes an mp3 copy and puts it on my flash drive
can't find that mp3 unfortunately

Now a cool story:
>older sounding guy calls in
>can't remember the issue but it was one of those routine things that just take a while
>we're shooting the shit while I do stuff
>he starts telling me stories about his youth
>turns out he was an old hippie
>tells me a story about how he got arrested for driving a car in New York naked while on acid
>when I told him he needed to buy a support contract, he was cool about it, and understood

2/2

>tech support
Did you just assume that I'm some low caste street shitter?

U.S. tech support jobs are actually either well-paid, or have killer benefits, now.

Mine, has both. I work from home, and I'm paid well. I sit around in my jammies all day on work days.

Great career choice

I find it fascinating that you appear to wish to judge people based upon their job or position, which is, most likely a tiny portion of what they contribute to a society.

Such things either indicate a personal insecurity, or a very skewed and poorly informed world view.

I hope I'm wrong about that, and you're just thinking you're being funny.

Sounds like a comfy work

Yeah, if you like constantly being enraged by stupidity, and abused by retards.

>Everytime I unplug this cable our network drops out
What cable are you unplugging?
>The one from our router to the wall socket
Yes that would be correct. That's the cable your network comes in
>But I want to unplug it
If you unplug your network cable, you will have no network
>Great. I will unplug it. You're in tech support, it's your job to fix it
I can only fix it by plugging it back in
>WHAT? No, I don't that. I want you to fix it without this cable here

This call went in circles for 90 fucking minutes

User asks where to fax the new user request form
New user request form is an online form
Ask user to submit online
User explains they already printed it out and want to fax it
No you fucking submit it online
User demands we reimburse them the cost of one piece of paper
User took said paper from office supplies
User cries to finance team and gets reimbursement for half a cent or whatever

>worked for an MSP.
>bitchy cook at a restaurant we serviced called in, demanding help getting her new mouse set up.
>tried to tell her just to plug it in. She refused. Wanted someone to come do it for her.
>tfw I sent out one of the engineers to do it, so she cost her employer like $300 for the service call because she couldn't plug in a USB mouse.

People's jobs are often the only thing they contribute to society, beyond general consumerism

I often wonder what magic they think allows this, because I've had similar.

Or stuff like throwing out power adapters because the laptop is wireless (yeah, I've had that one), or thinking wifi from home will work when they're 3000 miles away.

The saying around here is..

>I'm not "good with cars", but I don't just remove the wheels for shits and giggles and yell at my mechanic for not stopping me

I used to work in a pet store and it was the exact same shit

>why are my African cichlid fish so dull? Why don't they have bright vibrate colours?
>what kind of conditions have you got them in?
> Im using a industrial powered filter to blow crap off the bottom of the tank up into the filter
>your using an industrial filter to create a current?!
>yes, to keep the bottom clean so I don't have to clean it
>but your fish live in lakes normally..
>yes i know but...
>this goes back and forth for 40min
To put things into perspective, it's like making a person live in a perpetual hurricane and being surprised they are stressed the fuck out

Also every day some old lady came in wanting their fat cat to lose weight but insists on just leaving food out that they constantly top up

Ok I used to work apple Care phone support...and here is the single dumbest call and a few general idiot everyday call types.

So the biggest one that comes to mind is the day and old man called me.
>Thanks for calling apple Care blah blah bullshit.
>Old man with voice of foghorn Leghorn answers. this is gonna be good.
>'young man, I'm an older gentleman...my wife is dead...and my grandkids got me this here Mac computer. But as I'm alone I can not easily find answers to common issues sadly'
>That sucks sir what can I help ya with?
>'Well son I tell ya my eyes aren't so good these days and I need to, well, I need a better look at a picture...aw hell ya know what let's just cut the bullshit Shall we?
>My something fucked up is about to get said alarm goes off at this point
>'As said before I'm a lonely old bastard and I just wanna see some titties son ya understand?'
>I'm now helping an old redneck masturbate...
>Ok sir are the tits in question on your hard drive on is it a website your looking for tits on?
>'The interweb is where I found the boobs'
>Well sir most websites you can click an image to enlarge but failing that you can zoom the screen in with the option and + keys
>'Ok young man just lemme try em both out...ok I've now clicked the tits...HELL YEAH LOOK AT THEM BOOBIES!'
>Holy shit I'm imagining the Looney toons rooster using a Mac one handed now
>'Well that's easy guess I should try zooming in with the other method...hey boy this bitch has got a cute freckle on her areola!'
>Glad to be of assistance sir. Anything else?
>'Lemme speak to your supervisor if ya don't mind young man.!
>Put supervisor on phone...tell him it's a kudos call.
>Guy gets on phone...'this is supervisor speaking...'
>'Glad our employee could help sir...wait what? Oh a nipple piercing huh? Yes our screens are detailed sir, apple quality and all...'
>Super hangs up...'youve satisfied the customer in EVERY way...good job user!
>Old perv even leaves me a good survey.

Fun call.

Ugh. I'm not a prude, but asking someone else to help get your rocks of is just rude to me. Most people don't care to be forced into sex with you.

Finding something similar and using learned skills is fine.

Tip top kek

Oh no, somebody let the bullshit mask slip a little, time to go cry in a corner.

And as said before... general daily bullshit at Apple Care was pretty much exactly what you'd expect.
>At least three times a day a nigger (every fucking time yes a obviously black person) would call with a blatantly stolen iPhone to try and unlock. Usually give me some story about forgetting thier pin or the story of how a friend's child reset thier pin 'accidentally'. It read exactly like the stolen iPhone infographic...this never happened with anyone who sounded white or non ghetto as fuck.
>Broken iPads and iPhones...always the same shit too 'I let my kid play with it and they broke it can I have a new one?' answer was always fuck no you can't...these say on the box what age range is intended and you gave it to a god-damned 5year old like the shitty neglectful parent you are fuck off.
>Another daily call was the 'i was in the bathtub with my iPad/iPhone and dropped it fix it please'...always same shit there too, bag of rice and hope for best or take it to apple store
>The bane of everyone's existence though was always 'please help me set up imail with the email my fucking ISP gave me...ISP mail addresses DO NOT FUNCTION like a fucking Yahoo or Gmail or whatever account so those calls always ended up being an hour long minimum...
>And finally at least every few days some dipshit needed to erase homemade porn from iCloud before his wife/fiance/gf found out he was cheating. These too we're mostly niggers with few exceptions. One guys wife actually showed up screaming mid call as he was dumb enough to use the same iCloud account with his wife when he uploaded his amateur porn featuring her friend lol.

Aside from that it was mostly Mac toddler tier shit...the stereotype of apple users being fucking retarded held mostly true...then again I WAS in a call center so people with competent minds never called anyway.

Good on you user, you're a good sport.

...

Good post

Well what the fuck was I supposed to tell the old fuck exactly? No sir I can't help an old tech illiterate bastard with a simple query because it involved tits?

Whether it was inappropriate or rude or not the guy DID have a simple issue and o could solve it in under a minute so fuck it why not? At least he was blunt. Half the fucks who call in looking for porn (and yes it's constantly happening) beat around the bush and waste time. This dude though...hey I wanna enlarge some tits...awesome here's how...

Guy was happy and gave me a good survey...I made genuine extra cash for one funny call lasting less than five minutes. Wish all my calls were so simple and easy.

YOU were fine.
Old fuck needs to learn some fucking decorum.

>woman cant insert male dongle into a female port
with feminism, no one wins

You should had asked him how to perform the kame hame ha.

Yeah missed opportunity I suppose.

Really though alot of similar though less funny calls were had involving old OLD people and tech. Most were painfully sad though. Seems there was a thing during the iPad 2/3 days where old people's grandchildren would buy them an iPad for FaceTime...as a replacement for actually visiting the elderly IRL. I heard alot of crying old ladies tell me they only ever saw thier grandkids or great grandkids on a screen.

A few called trying to purposefully break them so they could make thier loved ones come see them for real. So the old horndog was a nice change of pace from the neglected old folks I usually got.

>Be me
>In accounting firm

Hey user, I fucked up my keyboard. I found some porn you know? Anyway here it is.

So I worked in a call center for three months during this summer to make some extra money. Most queries were about newspaper subscription -related stuff for the company we were working with. Needless to say they also had their news online, in applications and etc. I also managed emails.

>Call
>Woman, middle aged, coherent and polite explains that she manages a "leading" consulting company which requires constant knowledge of local news, mostly municipal politics
>Says that she can't read the paper online
>The company we were working with hadn't made any announcements directly to customer service agents but the new update in Firefox fucked up their upward compatibility and the prompts clearly say .js is slowing the page down
>Quite frankly they're not only making damage to themselves but to us as well
>Explain the situation and apologize, ask her to temporarily use a different browser
>Politeness stops
>"How can you know this if you said that no official announcements have been made?"
>"Ma'am, I tried it myself on my desktop yesterday when I was home which confirmed my suspicion."
>"Well you need to tell the tech boyo's there to actually do something. Do you know how much money I've lost due to this?"
>"Ma'am, I have no idea."
>"I've lost a week of news because of your problem and now I have to read them all, I demand two months of compensation."
>"Ma'am, I'm sorry to inform you that I'm not authorized to do that. I'm sorry that you've encountered this problem. Normally it isn't company policy to comp online subscriptions but I can make an exception here for two weeks."
>"Are you kidding? Normally I'd ask for a year or a two in these kinds of situations."
>"I can forward this to my manager, Ma'am, if you would like."
>Doesn't get comped at all, not even two weeks

Next time while relying on other companies to make profit for her I think she should read the terms and conditions. Which, by the way, were like 4 pages.

cont.

>email
>Woman, system says middle aged, email confirms
>text is a bit incoherent and rambling
>complains that she can't "open" online news which had worked before
>also points out that she's worked with computers since the 80's and even has taught about them
>says that "she isn't dementic" and that "the usual bullshit will not work with me"
>Think that this will be an easy case
>Grab the FAQ cheatsheet copypaste, edit it a bit and send it
>My reply contains the usual stuff in these kinds of diagnostics, e.g. "can you describe your problem in more broader terms, are you unable to log in or is this another issue" and "if possible please tell us the OS, browser and their versions"
>She replies a couple of hours later
>"I AM NOT DEMENTIC I SAID THAT I CAN'T OPEN THE NEWS FIX THIS!"
>Forward to my boss, stamp the mail to get into his non-urgent cases

This. Society pays you what they think you're worth. Your job and salary are the closest thing to an objective measure of your self worth that exists.

Used to work for a large high school as IT

>get a call from a teacher
>she says she can't get one of her students laptops hooked up to the projected
>go to classroom
>find out that the school shooter looking student in question is using a MacBook Air
>the projected was VGA so I explained to him that he had to use a thunderbolt to VGA to hook up his laptop
>says he doesn't have one
>it's my job to go get one
>que montage of my fat ass running across the school to my office and back to the class
>give him dongle
>he plugs it in and turns on the projector
>his desktop is a collage of all sorts of unholy hentia and anime
>at this point everyone in the class was just staring absently at the screen
>he opens chrome to get to his google slides
>multiple tabs of hentia and anime streaming sights as well as a few Sup Forums tabs (go figure)
>he clicks right next to the google slides tab and opens some mom on son hentia
>everyone in the class screaming
>I 360 moonwalk out of the class

Where are you based? This sounds like a story I heard at work some day

bump

>"umm, okay sweetie. why dont you...go find one of your books and look for sentences with those words in them. you normally shouldn't do that, but this time it's ok"

The call center I worked for actually trained us to "turn in to a broken record", when we come across people like that. Just say the same 2 or 3 sentences over and over and they eventually get the idea.

Tell more tech support stories damn it

>complains that she can't "open" online news which had worked before
>also points out that she's worked with computers since the 80's and even has taught about them

This is such a real thing when it comes to older people. Yeah, it's great that you messed around with computers 20-30 years ago, but you haven't kept up and I bet my 9 year old nephew knows more than you do.

Of course you can't tell them this because they'll blow a gasket, but it's the truth.

>mfw someone is rude so I'll just create their ticket, won't assign it and so it will sit at the bottom of the ticket queue until the SLA is near breach

Kek

>Working security support for CuckCast
>Customer calls
>'HURR DURR MY WEBSITE IS DOWN'
>uhhh I'm sorry sir what happened?
>'My website' s been down for 12 hours beecuzah yew bastards'
>Have you contacted your web host to see if it's on their end?
>'Who the fuck do you think you are, what's your employee ID I need to speak to a higher up'
>Ironically, my employee ID is 420
>Its 420 sir
>'WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU JUST SAY'
>I-Its 420 sir.
>'FUCK YOU'
>Thank you sir
>Hang up

Fuck Comcast tho

Good shit so far

Just story, not related to IT job.
I know this russian user, who sometime ago have studied informatics in university.
Tells me how he installed some old adventure gayme and instead of text he sees random ASCII characters (hieroglyphics in his own words), because old gaymes required to change locale to russian if want to see russian letters. Of course he didn't knew that, so he used pen and paper to decipher what was written in these ASCII characters.
Imagine reading wall of text like that.

kek

Worked in an IT shop for a summer. The owner was nice and didn't want us to incite people to buy retarded things, instead he wanted us to make people buy what they really need. It's good but a lot of people will fuck shit up anyway.

At least once a day :
> Hi I would like a computer to play minecraft/some shitty game/use Microsoft Office, I would like a fast one
> Show them a small computer at a reasonable price, capable of what they want
> They think it's not expensive enough, and that I'm trying to sell them shit
> They insist and end up buying a retardedly 1400 € high end computer with a Core i7/GTX 1080 for playing minecraft

One time :
> Guys comes in with his wife with a big binder
> Straight up tell me he wants a laptop that will last 10 years, that he's sickened by «all those chinese stuff that dies in 2 days»
> I'm pic related
> He opens his big binder on the desk, show me what he's been up to these last days
> Turns out he selected something like 10 laptops, and compared every characteristics of them on papers
> And by every, I mean EVERY
> All the basics but also max of RAM possible, technology of SSD's cells, CPU's instruction set, included shitty softwares, sound chipset, keyboard layout...
> Without understanding anything to it
> Tries to show me why this model might be better than this one because the RAM's access times are higher, shit like that
> Every time I tried to reason with him, he immediately becomes paranoid and starts insinuating that I'm «one of those sellers trying to sell him shit»
> «Understand that I'm done with bad computers, I really want this one to last 10 years»
> Meanwhile his wife is clueless, but she actually seems more sensible when I try to reason
Anyway after an hour of me trying to explain him obsolescence and what he was talking about; they got out of the store saying «they'll see». Probably went to another store and bought a computer from a seller who told him it will last 20 years. It's sickening.

However, I have to say that half of the clients weren't retarded at all. It's just the down 20 percents that made me question my faith in humanity.

He just wanted someone to talk too

t. Someone who haven't played minecraft with shaders and 512x512 textures
Pleb

I got asked by some middle aged lady if I could do anything with her car because when she parked in a certain place in the car park she was convinced that the mobile phone tower was interfering with it and it wouldn't start. The fuck am I supposed to do lady, wrap the engine in tin foil?

You'd wrap the ECU in foil to maim the glow in the dark CIA niggers.

>True Story Dude: The Thread

My favourite calls at Rogers were completely unrelated issues old people had. Tracking down their old war buddies, finding phone numbers for other companies, etc. Anything different was nice.

>I'm not a prude, but
99% of the time this is followed by proof that you're prude.

>worked at IT help desk for campus during last semester before I dropped out of program
>at help desk take simple calls for vague problems that no one does basic trouble shooting for
>fill out ticket best I can and tell someone if it requires immediacy
>don't know half the services people are asking about since I'm only part time and have no access to them (go figure)
>obnoxious older woman comes out every time I assign a ticket to her because she needs more info when I've already fucking gotten all the info I could (she did this literally every time I assigned something to her)
>at the other help desk which was in a student lobby, rarely anyone would come by
>sometimes when it was say, a friday or thursday and I only have an hour left and no one had come by at all I"d just leave early
>when the hurricane came by us and half the campus was gone I started my shift and just left after an hour, I didn't want to get caught in the rain
>dropped out, didn't return
>got internship right after that was a trial run for full time
>intern rate paid literally 2 weeks of part time work in a day
>get salaried position doing exactly what I want before the internship ends
>remind myself how fucking awesome it is to have a real job and not have to talk to idiots that expect you to fix things magically because they can't do something as simple as check if it's plugged in
>all my highschool friends still stuck in dead end jobs in food service, my 2% quarterly bonus is like 2.5 months worth of pay for some of them

i got so fucking lucky; on one hand if I had stayed in the master's program I would have fucked up and had to drop out anyway, leaving early to find a job was the best thing ever

I did apple tech support for awhile. Lot of really dumb people.
>What do you mean I need to charge the battery on my mouse? It said it was wireless! Why do I have to use a wire?!
>Why the hell do I have to pay somebody else for internet? I bought this stupid airport thing! I'm connected to it! Why can't I check my damn email?
>Some dude with a fucking G god damned 3 called in and complained he would have to pay for out of warranty support
>So, so many people trying to get help with their non-apple laptops
It was also a pain in my ass to explain to people when it was a hardware issue that they'd have to bring it into a genius bar for inspection. It's not my fault you live in the fucking boonies, Susan, but I can't fucking swap a hard drive with my telekenetic powers.

I had a great time doing AirPort support though, there were only about 100 agents on the floor nation wide at any point for that department and there were a lot of situations that required 20 minute waits for software to download, so you'd schedule callbacks and have a 1% chance of getting the same person again.

>Got into masters program
>Dropped out
You're the reason it takes so much bullshit interview work to get into a good grad school. Don't pursue that shit if you aren't gunna commit, a masters is only 2 damn years even.

I got in because I had been doing research work for a Prof for the entire year and he wanted to continue it. I had no job so I was like, sure, why not.

Then I started, enjoyed the first couple classes, but after the start of the second I just hated it. None of the courses are interesting, I had no interest in writing a thesis. I was done with school, I want actual fucking money. So I worked my final semester and applied everywhere I could and reached out to all my friends.

That worked and now I'm happy as shit.

Also, ps, I didn't have to interview for anything. I just did the bare minimum to qualify and told my prof I would do it. Then he approved my application.

>Lady claims that the radiation her PC gives off make her hands numb and she gets cramps
>Cant use New PCs due to this, uses a PowerBook G4 connected to an older CCFL monitor
>Husband 'engineer' builds her a Faraday cage for her PC which is still plugged into wall outlet
>By the point she calls me she's just finished wrapping her PC in Aluminum foil, wonders why she still 'reacts' to it
>I ask if she's been to a doctor, "Doctor's dont know whats wrong with me"
>Doesn't leave house or use cell phones so she hasn't talked to her family in years
>Needs New PC for webcam so can talk to Family about new Baby
>Either way she asks for a Computer, comparable to a Powerbook G4, but can run skype and has a screen that doesn't effect her
>Literally go through 4-5 Computers until she grabs a Intel NUC
>She ends up with the PC and she likes it, but the power LED affects her so asks if I can remove it
>"Don't just cover it up, because ill know, I can feel it"
>Immediately cover LED with Vinyl Tape and claim I removed it
>She's been happy ever since

She still calls and asks for things at least once a week. She wanted a new CCFL Monitor, a LED-less Webcam, she's also asked If i could remove LEDs from a LED backlit monitor, and make her computer worse so that it doesn't give off as much radiation, by Taking things out like the Processor, GPU, etc.
It's honestly pretty fun talking to her. Recently She bought a Portable DVD player because a friend said the screen wasn't LED backlit, after I told her it was, she immediately tossed it as she started to feel waves. It's obviously a mental thing, anything she thinks gives off radiation is painful, anything she thinks is safe is safe, regardless of how much emf or radiation it actually gives off.

If she went to a shitty chain restaurant where they microwave your food, would she instantly die because she knows it's been in the microwave or would she magically be fine?

If she knew it'd been in a microwave she either wouldn't eat it, or if she was told after, I'd imagine she'd make herself throw-up or fake convulsions.

Is she one of those types that won't go outside without a space blanket/aluminum foil wrapping her?

I would assume so. Ive never seen her, as she never leaves the house. Instead she'd send her Husband in with written instructions, sometimes calling the Store while he's there so we could both be on the phone with her. He looked like the most beaten highschool science teacher you've ever seen. Each time I saw him I wanted to tell him, Dude, just dont go back. You're free now.

>multiple tabs of hentai
>he clicks right next to the google slides tab and opens some mom on son hentai
>everyone in the class screaming
I desperately want this to be both real and fake at the same time.

I've worked two tech support jobs for two different ISPs(at one now).

I've taken so many stupid ones that I've lost count.

One that stands out
>DSL ISP
>woman calls in
>we begin troubleshooting her wifi
>ask her to hardwire her laptop, because the wifi is not working on the shitty little modem we gave her
>"uhh, a what?"
>explain what an ethernet cable is to her
>she snaps
>"DO NOT TALK DOWN TO ME, I HAVE A MASTERS IN ELECTRICAL ENGINEERING AND I WILL NOT BE TALKED DOWN UPON, I DO NOT HAVE THIS ETHERNET WHATEVER YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT, JUST SEND SOMEONE OUT TO FIX YOUR SHIT.
>make a ticket
>5 days out(lol Frontier)

Probably some BPD bitch.

I'll post more as they come to mind.

>one woman calls in
>says she thinks the wifi is affecting her baby
>says every time she turns on the modem her baby acts strange so it must be the wifi radio waves
>wants us to replace it with a different model
>mfw

not really a dumb one but funny

>customer calls in with a browsing issue
>she's like 95 years old
>"I can't read my stories!"
>uhh okay
>has some issue with the wifi
>hardwire her laptop
>remote login to her PC because it's easier
>she randomly takes control of her PC for a second, not knowing that I can move it as well
>see her favorites in IE
>"Harry Potter fanfiction"
>think those must be the "stories" she so badly wants to read
>whatever
>download a copy of a firmware upgrade for the modem because it fixes said wifi issues
>last saved location pops up
>for a brief moment before I clicked desktop on the left, I saw the last saved location's contents
>TONS of r34 of snape, harry, and ron
>very graphic images not some homolust softcore shit
>pretend I didn't see it

95 year old woman possibly shlicking it to harry potter r34 and fan fiction that was likely erotic in nature. scrub that image from your mind

fucking hell thats nasty

I feel like I annoy te tech support at my work because I know more than they do

>with feminism, no one wins
oy vey are you sure ?

>Don't want people involving me in their sex
>Called a prude for it

Stay classy.

> ISP mail addresses DO NOT FUNCTION like a fucking Yahoo or Gmail or whatever account
How so? STARTTLS, 25/143 ports for IMAP and it works.

>working for Microsoft support years ago
>notice my co-worker presses mute button at lightning speed, lets out loud roarous laughter and collects himself from orbit for a good while
>after he manages to finish the call resumes laughing
>ask whats up
>he tells some boomer was writing a book and had trouble with Word, so he ran some standard tests with him, asking him to SAVE document
>boomer had asked confusedly "do what??"
>after brief investigation co-worker deduced boomer had been writing, then always printing what he had written and continuing later from there
I still laugh at that memory, his face was so undescribable when he told the story.

Dumbest I personally encountered
>boomer lady calls and has some problem
>rapidly deduce ohshit she has a virus
>she needs to submit security ticket via internet form
>has no clue what is "web browser"
>constantly typing address I'm trying to give into google search getting nowhere
>tries to print pages "for reference" in the middle of procedure asking what buttons to push
>manages to close browser and press back button multiple times
>always has hard time remembering what to open and where to type
All in all submitting ticket took 31 minutes. Normally those cases are over in one minute.