I need help, please

Sup Forums my life as a NEET is over! I need to get a job quickly before I'm literally homeless. I have no experience working, but I have been a fat nerd my entire life, please help me get a job by utilizing all i know, which is computers. I only have a HS diploma, don't know what positions I can apply for, or how to show I'm qualified or at least competent. I want to work with hardware, I'm willing to start at the bottom just for experience and to have something on my resume.

I've tech supported for many Sup Forumsbro's here with linux and PC building questions please help me Sup Forums Last supporting parent is dead and have no family. I can survive for maybe 6-8 months, and that's probably without eating much.
I'm close to an hero and I'm seriously afraid.

-I can program a little in java and python.

-I've used mostly Linux for the past 5 years

-I know microsoft programs well

-I know rudimentary networking from years of fucking with and managing my home one and setting up servers

-I have experience with VMware and Virtualbox from past, and failed mining attempts.

Other urls found in this thread:

indeed.com/q-No-High-School-Diploma-jobs.html
indeed.com/q-No-Experience,-No-Problem-Entry-Level-jobs.html
cprogramming.com/tutorial/c-tutorial.html
learn-c.org/
learncpp.com/
cplusplus.com/doc/tutorial/
cprogramming.com/tutorial/c -tutorial.html
en.cppreference.com/
isocpp.org/faq
learnpython.org/
codecademy.com/en/tracks/python
wiki.installgentoo.com/index.php/Programming_resources
pragprog.com/book/bhwb/exercises-for-programmers
twitter.com/NSFWRedditGif

Nobody is going to hire a fucking loser who's 30+ and never had a real job in his entire life.
You should have already reached social maturity and a stable career by now.
This is all your fault.

Natural selection still works beautifully. Now if only they government would stop stepping in by sparing people like you...

There's always hope, user. You'll sure find something. It might not be what you're looking for, but you'll sure not die of hunger. Get decent and face the world. People with way worse conditions found their way up. I believe in you, user.

did a quick search and found these entry level jobs.

indeed.com/q-No-High-School-Diploma-jobs.html

indeed.com/q-No-Experience,-No-Problem-Entry-Level-jobs.html

You're also going to need to write a resume.

I bet you're not even good at any of those things you listed.
You're fucking worthless and of zero value to society. Why would society support you with gainful employment?
Fuck off.

You're with the 90%+ people that have fuckall for noteworthy skills & that can be replaced in like a week or two.

Take any job, be prepared to get thoroughly exploited (as in how the money your group produces is distributed) & have to be thankful for it.

Unironically this. And I say this as someone who works with hiring.

I'm not even kidding. You should go for fast food chains, janitor jobs, retail, etc. Anything that pays minimum will do for a start. Then you can try to go up.

By the way, pic related if you think that you are too good to be a McDonald's cashier. You are some 30 year old unemployable faggot, stop being pretentious and take what you can.

he could lie and say he worked help desk before, but I'm not sure if they'll check to see if he's truthful. OP will really be fucked if they ask for references.

You're pretty fucked because you'll be competing with people who also have 4-year degrees and are in the same boat as you, effectively unemployable from zero experience and forced to take minimum wage drudgery that has nothing to do with your field

Most people make this tolerable by getting up on their feet while they still don't have to worry about housing or feeding themselves on their own dime.
If you're actually serious, be prepared to move to where the jobs are.

Well, I'm kind of in his situation and this makes me want to kms.

Your only choice is to get a McJob and lie to them about why you've never worked before. You have absolutely no chance whatsoever of getting even the lowest entry level IT job if that was what you were hoping for.

Get any job for experience. If it's skilled good for you. Claim what you can meanwhile.

work at mcdonalds, it's not that bad. just don't talk to anyone because your social skills probably suck, it's fine. you were coddled your whole life. there really isn't competition in hiring either, they just select whoever looks like they're not gonna quit in two seconds and isn't a drug user.

there's going to be tons of anons calling you a piece of shit, it's pretty true but most people are pieces of shit who managed to sculpt themselves into more socially acceptable pieces of shit

i was scared to start working too, i did so at 18 but you seem like you're in your late 20's maybe early 30's. work at mcdonalds and try saving up money so you have backup for rent/bills. once you do that, definitely go to college for computer science and don't be lazy and skip classes. you can get a lot of money in loans to support yourself even if you're pretty old.

also, you can probably apply for disability and get the NEETBUX. it's really easy especially if you get diagnosed with aspergers/autism/ADHD/whatever minor petty bullshit people use as an excuse

you can do this, don't worry

>Sup Forums my life as a NEET is over!
>I need to get a job quickly before I'm literally homeless.
>I have no experience working
>Last supporting parent is dead and have no family
>I can survive for maybe 6-8 months, and that's probably without eating much.
>I have been a fat nerd my entire life
Gave me a good smile, OP. I hate myself for being a stupid drunk near college flunk out but I'll never be this bad I guess. Good luck, maybe try to do IT or something lol

Oh please. All op has to do is say he specialises in cyber security and he's hired.

Not without job experience, he wont.
Remember, you need 2-3 years job experience in order to secure your very first job!

Get a minimum wage job to sustain yourself for now. Then see if you can either find the time and energy to teach yourself properly or else finance a community college education.

Do you have two legs, two arms, a license, clean urine, and no will to live? The United States Postal Service is hiring carriers in your area. You don't even need to submit a resume.
Pay is ~$16/hr plus too much overtime.

this is why we need communism

Become paralytic and make it look like an accident, live with the pension's money the rest of your life.
Alternatively, just kys.
Hope it helps!

>Pay is ~$16/hr plus too much overtime.
Not OP but that's actually pretty decent. What's the catch? or are they desperate since no one wants to do it?

have you never seen a postal carrier in your life?

I know the term "going postal" refers to the mind-numbing job of working at a postal office, but I never though it was that bad.

>mfw when programmer in the 3rd world and make $5/hr.
You americans and yuros have it easy.

I'm worse than the two of you put together. You're like success stories compared to my life.

The best or maybe worst part is, I don't give a fuck.

>What's the catch?
The overtime pays well, but the maximum 60 hours/week means you basically have no life and receive no sunlight outside of work time when it gets busy.
>are they desperate since no one wants to do it?
Yes, the staffing situation is desperate.

If you are an alcoholic you are infinitely worse than op. Sorry to have to be the one to call you out.

storytime

how hard is it to get a helpdesk job with a couplr of entry level certs?

I got my first and only job last year at age 31. All I had was a CS degree I only just finished the year before that - no experience, no internships, no connections.

Now I'm making 100k.

I have no education beyond high school and I became an electrician. Choose a skilled trade and go to school for it. Right now you need money so go get a job at McDonalds or something. Don't be surprised when the work is hard and the pay is shit and people yell at you for no goddamn reason. You'll probably be okay since you browse Sup Forums but I've worked with Tumblr-tier crybabies with skin as thin as tissue paper. Don't be one of those people.

As an electrician the pay isn't great but I get by with a little left over. Learn to manage your money like a fucking jew. Waste not want not. Learn to make hardtack and eat it until you enjoy it. It's flour, salt, and water. A big bag of flour is like $2 a Walmart. Hardtack is just a thick cracker, and people have been eating them for centuries. They'll last for years if you store them right and most bugs don't touch them because they're so dry.

Similar situation, except mom (AKA supporting parent) got sick and I cant even off myself for now because that would leave her alone and she wouldnt be able to support herself.

The only job available her was factory job with commuting time of 3 hours, both ways combined.

Apart from that, working 10-12 hours for 3$ an hour in standing position, dealing with fucking bydlo, getting screamed at by shift leaders (because apparently this is normal as having Korean bosses scream at you, insult or make gesture like he is about to hit you)

I mean fuck, I never connected with ppl and still cant get over being bullied my whole life but this job does not my integration into society any easier.

Fuck you cynical niggers. Do you lead perfect lives? Are you without flaws. Fucking edgelords.

Explain.

leading a perfect life and getting a job or at least a community college education by your 30's are two different things. I just landed a paid internship with shitty grades, while attending a community college, and I've been working at a fast food chain before then. I'm 18. Fucking try, it's not hard.

Fuck you. You're probably a deluded libertarian fatass who's not even more useful than him but uses terms like "nanny state" and didn't understand even now that we got all fucked up by how your contradictory ideals led toward the loss of net neutrality.

We're all humans with basic rights, and if you start being a douche to others who are more in need, don't expect to receive mercy. No one who only wants to work and survive should be denied his basic rights.

OP, I think you could get an Oracle system admin certification and aim for that job: if you've used Linux and installed some virtual machines you could be very fit for managing systems for companies or even servers. Best wishes!

You don't know what sorts of problems and situations people face.
People like op probably come from a place of from mental illness and bad environments/relationships, and its not intelligent to:
1)Assume that the template that worked out for you is applicable to everyone else ever and:
2)Everyone that do not forcefully fit that definition must be lazy bums, retards, etc.
At the end of the day, op must chose to have hope, because if he do not believe in the possibility of a better life, he might as well kill himself already. And that pretty much applies to everyone else.

The story is far too pathetic, even for this site.

Do it.

There's a difference between a lazy piece of shit and a useless piece of shit. I'm a lazy piece of shit. On my days off hygiene is an afterthought and my living space is a fucking mess half the time.

The only excuse for this type of thing is mental illness, but if OP is having this problem then they should probably try and get help for that, considering there are usually government programs and such to help with that. At the very least he could flip burgers.

Dude, just spit it off. Make us feel better about our shitty lives by comparing to you.

If all you know is computers, you've set yourself up for failure. You need to diversify your skills in life to be independent.

Apply for any job user. Little money is better than no money if SS has dried up. Everyone starts somewhere, so stop limiting your options and apply everywhere. Get a job that sticks and keep looking while you save up money. If you're a know it all nerd, turn your life around by yourself.

> this is what happens to t. wagecuck posters.

Tell me how you got a paid internship user I'm in community college right now.

try to get a job as a janitor or in fast food or something

set a quota for urself like 10 applications a day.

u will fail the first few interviews, that is ok.

>As an electrician the pay isn't great

what state do u live in. in my local ibew the journeymen make like 80k a year

do u live in south korea?

No choice but to join the military user.

Your only option left is to sell your boipussy to a rich arab.

>mom is the breadwinner of the family
iktf

Same position as op, except I made 200k this year day trading but haven't reported it to the irs. I can afford an apartment but they won't even let me rent when I offered to pay the entire year up front. I have no proof of income since I've been a neet for 6 years and they all just shoo me away.

Let me tell you op, even finding a job at best buy or target is hella difficult. And I have an a+ and a ccna.

At this point I might have to move to Ohio or some shithole and outright buy a house.

Go to /adv/ so they can tell you to kill yourself and they'd be right.

get a McJob. after a few years of creeping out your co-workers and possibly getting "let go" a few times for said behavior, you might begin to develop some semblance of social skills. then you can move up to factory job where; you'll work until you die or robots take your job. you'll always have dreams user, but reality doesn't give a shit.

Why, so he can have a job but starve to death anyway?

Fabricate some inspirational story about being a carer for a/your parent(s) for the last n years (I don't know how old you are, other anons seem to be assuming ~30). Make sure it sounds humble but details how self sacrificing you were. Clarify that you still had time to self-teach yourself essential technical skills and make sure there's nothing in there that would suggest you're depressed/stunted/otherwise impeded when it comes to employability.

Dress well, do some practice interviews, write a good CV. Apply for help desk or PC hardware places. Good luck.

Go as freelancer. Get money.

Or find any IT entry level job, if you are good at computers they will notice.

Where did you learn daytrading?

If you have no social skills then I suggest you hone them first. It's a must in today's world. Also do you even have friends? You need to have people around you so they can recommend or connect you if you want a job. I can't stress this enough. It's not yet too late to turn your life around. If all else fails, I suggest becoming a monk and going to monasteries. It beats being homeless and suffering mental illnesses because of it. Rather be celibate than die and be crazy on the streets. It's not like you're going to reproduce anyway.

3-part pasta, coming in. Brace yourself, user.

Build a solid GitHub, put time into your resume, do some part-time or contract work, have LIVE projects you can demo to people or point them to a domain.

This + relevant degrees (BS, MS) and I'm clearing 170K as a new grad next year.

Put in work and you'll be rewarded. Spend all your time studying, get off of Sup Forums and start reading books, doing tutorials, writing blog posts, put yourself deep into self-improvement and I promise you you'll do well.

disregard op im gay

So you want to learn programming?

Pick a starting language. For beginners, there are generally two recommended "programming families" that you can choose to start learning:
-Dynamically typed/interpreted programming languages, such as: Python, Perl, Ruby
-Statically typed/compiled programming languages, such as: C, C++, C#

These are amongst the most popular languages in use worldwide, including 4 from the top 5. Both approaches are perfectly fine, and well-documented.
-Dynamically typed programming may be a bit more flexible, convenient, and forgiving. It is more popular in academia.
-Statically typed programming is a bit more suited for making general applications. It is more popular in industries.

Cannot decide? Flip a coin.

If you choose statically typed/compiled programming, you may want to start with C, then pick up C++. C is very well documented, and teaches many universal programming concepts. C++ is based on C, and adds new concepts. Sources:
For C:
The C Programming Language (K&R)
C Primer Plus (Prata)
cprogramming.com/tutorial/c-tutorial.html
learn-c.org/

For C++:
learncpp.com/
cplusplus.com/doc/tutorial/
cprogramming.com/tutorial/c -tutorial.html
en.cppreference.com/
isocpp.org/faq

If you choose dynamically typed/interpreted programming, you may want to start with Python. It is very easy to pick up. Here are some good sources:
learnpython.org/
codecademy.com/en/tracks/python

>BUT I WANT MORE SOURCES!
Read: wiki.installgentoo.com/index.php/Programming_resources

>BUT I WANNA START WITH [language x] INSTEAD!
Sure, if you like. But the languages above are considered good for beginners.

>BUT I WANNA MAKE A COOL WEBSITE!
Learn HTML, CSS, and Javascript.

>BUT I WANNA MAKE iPHONE GAMES!
Learn Objective C and/or Swift.

>BUT I WANNA MAKE ANDROID GAMES!
Learn Java.

>BUT I WANNA MAKE PC GAMES!
Learn patience.

So you want a starting/junior programming job?

You MUST master the basics of programming, and be able to implement your programming knowledge using any language. That means solving problems without relying on any particular syntax. If you cannot separate programming syntax from programming concepts/algorithms, then you will need to go back and focus on the basics.

After mastering the basics, you want a starting job. Let us look at languages that will help you launch your programming career. And no, you will not be earning $300k/year when you are just starting, but you may do so if you persevere.

1- Java. Enormously popular, Java is everywhere, and everyone wants a Java developer. A must for Android applications.

2- Javascript. It runs most of the internet! A must for website developers, (with CSS and HTML.)

3- Objective C/Swift. The languages that power Apple gadgets. A must for iOS applications.

There are more languages in high demand, but they require more experience. Master the following to expand your horizons:

-SQL. Because data must get stored.
-C. Real programmers point to this language.
-C++. For classy, objective programmers.
-Python. For high-paying sssoftware engineering jobs.

>WHAT OTHER LANGUAGES ARE IN HIGH DEMAND?
Other than what was mentioned above: C#, Ruby, and PHP.

>I WANT TO WORK WITH HARDWARE DIRECTLY. WHAT LANGUAGE IS CLOSEST TO THE METAL?
Machine code. Good luck, friend.

>WHAT HUMANLY-READABLE LANGUAGE IS CLOSEST TO THE METAL?
Assembly. When it comes to programming, Assembly is the apex predator.

>I WANT TO KNOW ABOUT THE LATEST NEW MODERN not-a-fad LANGUAGES!
Take a look at Rust, Go, Hack, Scala, Julia, Dart, and Erlang.

>THOSE LATEST not-a-fad LANGUAGES WILL GUARANTEE A JOB, RIGHT?
No.

>I STARTED LEARNING [language x] BUT YESTERDAY MY [friend/lecturer/uncle] SAID TO SWITCH TO [language y]. WHAT DO?
You have already started, so stick. That other language will still be there when you are done with your current task.

>need to get a job
>quickly

you're shit out of luck.

So you want an online source of revenue?

Online work can be of many forms. You can be a programmer, a designer, a translator, a copy-editor, a writer. Any job that primarily uses a computer can be done online. Try one of the following sites:

Mechanical Turk - Simple jobs, low pay, backed by Amazon.
UpWork - Formerly oDesk. Jobs range from simple to complex, with pay to match.
Freelancer - Where you can hire people to do anything from minor to major projects.
Rent-a-Coder - It is in the name.
Fiverr - Any job for $5.
Rev.com - And then there is this.

And now there is no excuse for you, if you truly want to make some $$$ online! Best of luck!

Buy this: pragprog.com/book/bhwb/exercises-for-programmers

Start a blog and github.
Do the exercises in language of choice when you're not submitting resumes.

Also, start eating healthy and exercising.

He can turn his life around and get a job if he has any friends and/or connections he can turn to. Problem is if he's a loner and has no friends, he's going to have a hard time getting a job or have someone recommend him. This is why I suggest to OP to at least become a monk if all else fails. Beats being homeless and becoming mentally ill. Problem is you have to be celibate but anything is better than living on the streets.

DUDE JUST PUT ALL YOUR SAVINGS IN [current /biz/ memecoin] AND GET RICH IT'S EASY

seriously though if you have 0 work experience you'll be a janitor or walmart greeter if you're lucky

>B-BUT HOW SHOULD I GET WORK EXPERIENCE IF EVERY JOB REQUIRES IT
college internships or be friends with someone important

buy 2-3 cycles worth of test and tren, get big, lie about being natty and become a personal trainer or male prostitute if you have good insertions

What kinda of terrible advice is this? You do not _need_ good insertions to become a male prostitute.

OP, if you're still around, take a breather and don't let these idiots get to you. Yeah, you set yourself behind. No, all hope is not lost. With your skills, ifyou can handle yourself halfway decent in an interview, my advice would be to look for a pc repair or phone repair store that's hiring. I just stepped into the industry from a similar skillset, and you're already overqualified. It's a good entry-level foothold into the tech field that is hugely overlooked. With no qualifications I started at 10/hour, 40 hour weeks, plus commission on my repairs and relatively easy advancement without needing a promotion (getting cleared as a level 2 or 3 technician, for instance).

You don't have to fix phones, but shit like this, man. My number one piece of advice is dress halfway decent and try to introduce yourself to a manager where you want to work. Don't be a resume in the pile, be a face that gives a shit about the job. Being passionate about taking shit apart is more than enough to get you into a decent starting tech job, and from there it's a hop, skip and a 2-year certification into real IT.

And there's shit like this in any industry. Also, if you're not finding anything solid in that realm, deal with a shit job for long enough to learn a basic trade. Easy training, VERY high demand, and pretty solid pay/benefits.

Chin up, my dude. Shit's really not as bad as it seems once you just dive in. It's just intimidating as hell right now. And fyi, I genuinely enjoy being at my shit-pay entry level phone repair job.

Learn how to make stolen iphones work. Just google how to replace a magic board and get advertise yourself online. I've made 3k in one month.

damn. a lot of nobodies projecting in this thread.

Do what must be done. Find a land whale with a job, fuck her and move in. NEET life continues.

Where can we apply?

I'm in the exact situation as OP now with the exception of having no job experience and parents dead. I'm pretty much stuck in this dark phase in my life and reality isn't like rainbows and roses like you describe. It gets worse and unless someone helps you, there's no way out. He needs:
>friends to help him connect and get recommended
>social skills if he wants to last in his job

OR

>get manual jobs if you can do it

Now's not the time to choose. I lost my friends, I've been made a pariah and a social outcast due to one sociopath I encountered in my life, my family is a mess and I am suffering from depression but life won't stop without me. OP is probably even in a better spot than me in starting over since he has nothing to begin with. If he can't cut it then he better become celibate and at least try becoming a monk or he's off to the streets. That's the reality in today's world and making it all flowery to make himself "feel good" just doesn't cut it.

That's assuming OP is an alpha or a nigger. Problem is he's fat as fuck (already stated) and he has no friends so the chances of landing one desperate landwhale is zero.

This is me except I have a degree. Depression is a bitch.

Working out will help cure both depression and obesity.

I'm kind of in the same position as you. I just turned 30 and have like 250-280k in crypto gains. I only have about 80k in crypto and the rest I got some precious metals. I want a real job though.

You didn't hear? crypto only goes up /s

Honestly, why weren't you in community college OP? I don't mean to insult you but you were supported by your parents right so you had free time?

I'm a piece of shit with poor work ethic, chronic depression and autism but I forced myself(along with my parents encouragement) to graduate.

Anyway if I was you I would look at a trade school and see if they have any short programs in a specific area.

How do I do that if it's freezing all the time and I have no vehicle

Tips on overcoming depression and managing to get yourself to workout?

Just lie on your resume, like lmao nigger how can anyone be unemployable? I got a lead dev job at a startup for 230k at 20, dropped out of HS and faked 5 years experience.

>get a mcdonalds job
This
You'll get experience socializing that way
Next step is to get an ugly gf to split the bills with
Yes, they exist

give some resume tips. what type of companies did you put on there and they didn't try to verify it?

Thanks lad that gives me motivation

Common names or ones without an online prescence. Spliced shit from other people's resumes to make my bullet points believable for my roles. I don't even have a linkedin. When they asked why I'm not working anymore or why they can't find them anymore I just make up some bullshit, "oh our CEO got bought out for our assets and then the parent company no longer needed the team."

how to do you get to 30 years old and end up like this
you knew your parent wouldn't leave you money and didn't think to plan for when they died?
didn't even try to lie for disability money?
maybe you should just die

I am not nearly as bad as OP. But my employment history is filled with holes,flunks outs of college,and finally settled for a Psych degree that is worthless. Thankfully I've had a bunch of years of doing PC repairs as freelance and did take the IT training but never the certs cus i was busy with college work and banging a few emotionally damaged chicks. Now I am in my mid 30s neet bux are going thin and so far I have to muster all courage to get a call center job/IT jobs in a place that they'd rather take their own kind than my own.

OP if you know how to code you're ahead of the curb for a lot of people try to get a part time enough to have a roof over your head and in your free time instead of jacking it to your assorted perverted material read books technical book and maybe ask for a loan for a retraining program if in the states there's money for states left over from obama to retrain people to get certified in shit. If all else fails go to jail and get food housing and non consensual sex for free for the rest of your days or until you get shanked by an inmate.

You need no vehicle to work out. Work out at home, for a start.

I do not know how to overcome depression, but for encouraging yourself to exercise:

1- Cheat at first, by rewarding yourself. Cut out desserts on all days that you do not work out on.
2- At first, take small steps that are easy to accomplish, and make sure they become part of your lifestyle
>Today, and every day from now, I will walk 500 meteyards. Walking 500 meteyards is very easy, but once it becomes a habit in ~2 months time, I can increase it to 700.
3- Pull factor: Go to /fit/, check out the sort of body you could have, if you exercised. Check out the sort of person you could attract with that body of yours, if you exercised.
4- Push factor: Go to /fit/, check out the FPH threads and read the FPS stories.

As long as you are discontent with your current condition, and have a genuine desire to better yourself, you can do it. You may try and succeed a little, then try more and fail a little, but as long as the desire for self-improvement is there, you will surely be able to get better in the long run.

We are all here for you. Sup Forums has tonnes of overweight+depressed people who are trying to get better, and you can join us in our efforts.

/fit/, though full of chads, is also there for you, for they are bro-chads and not snob-chads.

...and I am here for you. I have gone from obese (clinically obese, no joke) to plain "overweight". Am struggling, and the improvement is slow, but it is happening. We can encourage each other! God knows I need it too!

>20
>lead dev
>230k

fuck damn, you fucking trolls don't even attempt to be believable anymore.

Fix amd bug by simple logical function and 32 flags with 64 pointers which renders time reading of somebody who wants to read something more usefull from memory really hard, because those flags and pointers doesn't have to have specific addresses, so in fact it makes it unreadable, all the memory is just just nonsense... And figuring out a sense is quite load to notice and well, detect.

please do not delude people into thinking exercise cures autism
/fit/ is full of permavirgins because they fell for that

What does

benzodiazepines and alcohol

Who said anything about autism? Exercise can cure obesity and depression.

you can look like the guy on the left but you'll still stutter and clam up if you did it while you were fat. women will date charismatic skeletons before autistic gymrats.

Yes, a healthy person can screw up just as much as an unhealthy person. At least the healthy fellow has his health.

naw, you get a lot of leeway being hot. girls will give you plenty of chances. you'll get a lot of practice with your social skills minus the negative rejections.