Drunk/high Technology Stories Thread

Share some stories about tech that involve being drunk or high.

Here's one from my mom (my dad's an IT guy)
>Be her
>Dad was drinking all night, still in bed
>Get up to go make him some coffee
>Bring it back to him. He's still drunk af
>"What am I supposed to do with this?
>"Drink it?"
>"B-But what about the CA?"
>"What's a CA"
>*with all the attitude of a bratty teenager*
>"ugggh!! The Certificate Authority!?!"
>"umm, okie dokie then! I'll look into that"
>open up GIMP
>Make a little 'Certificate of coffee' for him, bring it back
>"here's your certificate"
>*looks at it* "huh, well I guess I can drink this then"

>look how cool and drunk I am guys and drugs are cool

Only pajeets and mudslimes never drink or do psychedelics. Which are you?

Am I the only one who wants to lick the left one's armpit?

Not at all, Saya's armpit-pussy is considered a delicacy in Nippon

i think we have a strong candidate for worst thread of 2018. taking drugs is one thing but bragging about it is really just fucking degenerate.

sage of course.

DUDE ALCOHOL LMAO

>implying i was implying

Canada was a mistake

cringe

>t. Mutt'

How do you piss dust? Dude needs to lay off the booze and drink some fucking water!

lmao I know a dude who was so blackout he peed on his xbox 360 and giggled the whole time

Found the leaf.

>only muslims and pajeets don't drink
drinking makes you stupid. i never drank a single sip of alcohol in my life. that is why you are in a shit job and i am your boss faggot.

Nice try pajeet, but I don't have a job.

>be me
>19
>want to coreboot my x220
>too scared to do it, don't want to fuck my laptop
>also don't really have enough time to worry about it
>two weeks later
>spent an evening with 7 friends in my flat
>get really fucking drunk
>at some point start talking about the x220 and free software
>one of them is interested, begin serious conversation about it
>tell him you can flash a new bios
>"no way dude"
>tell him some more about it
>wake up next morning with a headache
>see my laptop
>its open
>ohfuckohfuckohfuck
>plug keyboard in
>it boots coreboot
Still don't know how drunk me managed to do that

> be me
> Try to code while high
> Get absolutely nothing done and write fucking retarded code

Now I don't smoke anymore because I don't want to be retarded

Agree. Trump never ever drinks at all.

You've never tried it, not even once? You can bullshit yourself but we all know the real reason: you're afraid of who you might really be underneath the image you so carefully construct - the image you use to convince yourself that you are the person you want to be.

You'll never really know yourself. You can live your life that way, but it's a sad illusion.

I believe it is the nitrates in the piss desu left over after the piss evaporates

Holy shit that's awesome. How's the boot speeds?

Extremely fast. Only downside is that I think I can't swap fn and ctrl keys anymore, but I think I can live with that

> be me
> be stuck debugging
> fug id i'm geddin hiiiiii :DD :DDD
> be stoned and almost instantly realize what the error was
> fix the error
> it works
> try to do more
> fuck up everything

>be a retard
>smoke some weed
>do retarded things
>blame the weed
It's not weed's fault you are retarded retards.

>be shitcoin day trader
>restart anti-depression meds
>follow up with a bit of xanax
>feel like having a nap
>wake up 17 hours later
>wearing two layers of everything
>window open and heater on full blast
>30% increase in my trading portfolio