Would you work for the FBI?

Would you work for the FBI?

Other urls found in this thread:

motherboard.vice.com/en_us/article/d737mx/the-fbi-cant-find-hackers-that-dont-smoke-pot
m.youtube.com/watch?v=nyDMoGjKvNk
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Office_of_Personnel_Management_data_breach
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/United_States_Office_of_Personnel_Management#2015_data_breach
mirror.co.uk/news/uk-news/prolific-paedophile-encouraged-rape-boy-11993392
trutv.com/shows/adam-ruins-everything/blog/adams-sources/adam-ruins-forensic-science.html
twitter.com/NSFWRedditVideo

No. Probably can't smoke weed on occasion

What the fuck is going on in that image?

If they wanted me to... I wouldn't mind having a cool badge and some authority. Unfortunately I have a very colorful past, filled with drug use and hacking. I doubt they'd want me among their ranks.

Only if I could work towards shutting down Sup Forums.

I've got my ACE certification but that's retarded easy to get, but yeah I'd be down with it

>Thinking you couldn't just lie about smoking weed and then continue to smoke weed

Government jobs like that test you every month or so

Only downtown on Saturday nights.
Sittin' in a nest of bad men.
Whiskey bottles pilin' high.

Fuck, no wonder they can't hire any good hackers motherboard.vice.com/en_us/article/d737mx/the-fbi-cant-find-hackers-that-dont-smoke-pot

No. I can't imagine the amount of paperwork you'd have to fill out every week.

From what I've heard its not too fun.

Long training just to do data entry shit, with every now and again a good fieldwork case.

I'll pass.

>Would you work for the FBI?
Sure thing, if it gets me out of Australia.

Fuck yeah and I don't even live in burgerland

No, because due to it being a government position, I would be minitored and be highly scrutinized over everything. I would have to sacrifice too much for it to be worth it.

>filled with drug use and hacking
ketamine with your loser script kiddy friends isn't the reason they wouldn't want you among their ranks

No I'm not a dumb wageslave.

depends on what the position is
I don't wanna be the guy who has to peruse the cheese pizza

Kek

You're a dumbass. I tried to apply to the FBI. You know you have to go through a polygraph test right? Good luck lying in it. Also if you've downloaded anything from copyrighted images, school book PDFs, streamed music illegally through apps such as new pipe or un copyrighted videos on YouTube, any porn which has been uploaded illegally, and movies and TV shows streamed and downloaded illegally
If you have done any of those in the past two years before applying your resume is getting trashed son. They'll know.

Daily reminder that David Koresh did nothing that warranted a raid from the ATF and arson by the FBI

No. Fucking statists..

Pffft, polygraph tests are bullshit anyways, you can fool those things super easily: m.youtube.com/watch?v=nyDMoGjKvNk
I have a hard time believing they really give a shit about whether their candidates have dled or streamed anything illegal unless it's cp or some shit, they would never get any qualified candidates otherwise, and even if they did I hide most of that shit thru vpn. The hard part would be drug testing if you took marijuana since it can be detected in your hair for years afterward, but as long as you shave most of your hair and stop taking weed a few months beforehand you'd be clean on any test they could give you

that's a fake death scenario they use for training purposes

Depends if I would be obliged to frequently encounter violent armed criminals and risk my life all the time. If this is the case, then no: I'd rather do cybersec contractor work.

As far as I remember they don't care much about your background nowadays. If they did, I doubt they would solve any cases. Many ex-hackers work for the FBI these days.

Yes I would it sounds like a cool job
I'd get to be the guy vanning people in this shit website

Yes, although most of that desire comes from binge-watching X-files
Sadly it may be too late since you gotta apply til you are 25

>everybody is as bad as me
whatever helps you cope

Yes, although I doubt I could ever get such a job.

I'd rather work for the CIA, but the FBI is less secretive, so it would be less stressful.

Fuck off namefag

My goal right now is to end up in a graduate position with my country's equivalent of the NSA. Federal security Jobs seem to be super comfy.

Are you gay?

>polygraph test
Do burgers still believe in this?

Fuck off Anonymousfag. Anonymousfags are like sheep in a herd, can't differentiate between them.

You get paid for hacking, catching pedos, spying on normies
Sounds too good to be true

I'd rather work for Skunkworks' black projects just to be involved in humanitys top of the line tech research

...

>ketamine
britbong detected

You're already (unknowingly) working for the FBI if you're using computers with Intel ME or AMD PSP backdoors or using your ISPs router, a smartphone, whatsapp, facebook, microsoft, apple, google and other things.

Those tests are about telling the truth and being trustworthy. Admitting to pirating isn't a big deal, lying about being a pirate and them finding out will kill your application.

Nope their a huge part of a government with too much power. Plus I like drugs so fuck em

Go away normal niggerfaggot

What's their policy on anime desktop wallpapers?

It seems like the FBI lost it's honor and respect that it had with this whole Trump thing.

you’re joking right? as an fbi agent you could literally go around raping and pillaging the city and absolutely nothing would happen to you. In fact, you would get a paid vacation.

>links to some stupid video
Why are people like this? Complete idiots I mean. That video gives you nothing.
Post a study on the effectiveness. Or Wikipedia. Wikipedia is way better than that junk.
I'm always surprised when I see the numbers o those videos.

I already got security clearance through a college internship. I guess I could help that survey their properties.

no it didn't you fucking cock sucker

go suck a russian dick

>work for an agency that only exists to blackmail and strip away rights

Fuck off dumb Redditor. Filtered.

federal, state, and local police agencies and otherse all use it as an excuse if they don't want to hire you
everyone knows its worthless

Not to mention they received plenty of tips about Cruz before he shot up the school yet did fuck all. The FBI is a joke today

You recruiters are getting lazy

Libcuck tears.

this

T. Clinton

Degenerate

Get paid to do nothing? Hell yeah

I wouldnt mind serving my country, but I really don’t want to live in maryland/virginia so that would limit my career prospects heavily, being limited to lower positions in field offices.

I suppose posting here, and looking at lots of big titty porn doesn’t hurt your security clearance? Because if so then im boned

I would prefer to work for GCHQ or the NSA

I get the feeling that its better to just work for contractors and stay private sector.

Lmao pussy everyone can lie on a polygraph, I've known multiple people that have lied their way past it, it only works if you get worked up about it

ahahaha

no
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Office_of_Personnel_Management_data_breach
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/United_States_Office_of_Personnel_Management#2015_data_breach

I'm an autist so I'd fit right in.

Dude weed lmao

you will also have to sodomize and then kill an 8 year old beautiful healthy boy, while they film it, so they have what to leak when you don't want to do what they want... i mean what you want, cuz there won't be any difference between (you) and them
p.s. leaking also applies in case of suicide so don't you dare

So they only get faggots go figure

>chase down neckbeard pedophiles online
>confiscate their cp
>copy it to my flash drive as 'evidence'

No surprise there.
Lots of hackers are generally intelligent, which leads to depression issues that led them to blackhat hacking in the first place.
Said depression necessarily comes with drug abuse, body abuse and others.
It's a sad state of affairs.

Then get arrested like this fucking weird cunt.

mirror.co.uk/news/uk-news/prolific-paedophile-encouraged-rape-boy-11993392

No. The Federal Bureau of Incompetence is a highly corrupt, low level arm of the deep state. All of their higher ups deserve to dangle from street lamps by their pathetic little traitorous necks.

t. the patriot Chad

>muh vice article
>muh weed
Of course it would be a bunch of lazy, dirty potheads signing up to play hackerman. This just makes me hate all of you retarded stoner freaks twice as much. Most of Sup Forums is depressed from living in clown world, so they do drugs as an escape instead of trying to fix stuff. You'll get purged with the rest of the filth when the real men step up and take this land back from you degenerates. You aren't fit to run this nation, nor defend it from thousands of angry warriors willing to go on suicide missions just for the catharsis of putting a boot up the ass of evil.

Kill yourselves, soyboys.

more like the only hackers dumb enough to apply are the ones who smoke marijuana
they will probably get hired by banks and used for cheating people out of their money or something

>highly corrupt, low level arm of the deep state
no, the FBI is part of the shadow government, not the deep state
on the other points i agree with you

You act as if I am defending stoners.
I despise them in every way.
I agree with everything you posted, by the way.

That show posts sources for everything they say: (only works on the desktop site for some reason): trutv.com/shows/adam-ruins-everything/blog/adams-sources/adam-ruins-forensic-science.html

t. incel

There aren't any "real men", day of the rope will never come, white people will continue to decline because people like you sit in your basement and shitpost instead of getting women. You're destined to die out, cuckboy.

NewPipe, the open source YouTube client is illegal??

>jumps straight to race
This exactly why we're going to win, you scared, paranoid little kike. It isn't just whites on this continent that are waking up to the problems caused by jews, it's other races too. We're all going to set aside our differences to storm your houses and string up every last one of you nation wrecking freaks. This is why you're all out there pushing for outright communism and gun control. I'm not interested in getting rid of whites, because after you're done with them, you'll come for me next. Ban long guns, I fucking dare you.

nigger

Fuck off back to Sup Forums

I mean, they know that anyway. Getting a security clearance is a bitch and the higher you go the more thorough they'll be about combing through all of your shit.

Polygraph is probably more of a personality test among other tools they have for criteria judgement to see if you're a good fit or not.

But then again, this is the same agency that did fuckall about school shooter reports and ISIS agents shooting up gay nightclubs who so knows.

Only if I could hunt aliens with a qt ginger as a partner

no spooks for me

Would you like to talk about the genetic and cultural similarities between the people that head the federal reserve, or would that be too uncomfortable of a topic to confront? How about the jew of Broward county, Scott Isreal, that sat outside as children were shot? Does it upset your delicate sensibilities when I point out that jews are doing bad things?

Please, for the love of god

>t. the patriot Chad
>votes for a kike

I already have the weed, dude lmao, how do I the black hat