Ethanol goes from your blood to your lungs. Then you exhale it and the ,machine measures ethanol in the air.
So what if you had a device in your mouth that could combust some of that Ethanol? Lowering the ethanol measured.
I figure you use an electric arc in a tube. The device sits against the roof of your mouth. Pressing against it wit h your tongue turns it on, and diverts air to it.
It's always a great idea to combust ethanol in your mouth
Why not just stop being a drunk?
How about you don't drink alcohol before driving? I heard thats the best way.
>The state of Sup Forums.
>Combust ethanol that's in your mouth and lungs
This sounds like a lawsuit waiting to happen
Implant an ethanol scrubber in your windpipe.
Best part it's a passive device so no need to turn it on/off.
Literally this.
Doesn't matter if you get caught or not you're still putting yourself and others at risk.
I'm not some 'anti-drug / alcohol' person either by any stretch of the imagination.
> KV emissions in your mouth
PLEASE TRY THIS OP. IT DEFINITELY WILL NOT ENSURE YOUR COMPLETELY FUCKING RETARDED BLOODLINE STOPS WITH YOU.
>hey guise when I get drunk and drive I risk like a FINE and also I may found consequences to my actions so... What about a fuckin taser in my fucking mouth?
Yes OP I think you're onto something, please try it and report ASAP
Nah m8. Simple gas canister. Bite it to release compressed air.
>not realizing point of this thread is weeding drunks out of the populace
what if you had a second, motorized lung that was attached to you like a colostomy bag so whenever you needed to take a breathalyzer, you could just divert your trachea to the motorized lung that was bringing through fresh air from outside your body
Right, hear me out. It's going to be very expensive, but what about a platinum catalytic converter in your mouth?
>drinking and driving in the age of uber and ride sharing
Consider an hero faggot. Seriously drinking and driving is not worth it. I knew a guy who killed a guy while drunk driving. I'm sure he wishes everyday that he would have just taken an uber or a cab instead of driving home drunk from the bar and killing an innocent guy who was crossing the street.
>device sits against the roof of your mouth. Pressing against it wit h your tongue turns it on, and diverts air to it.
While drunk.
Yeah. That's gonna work. Just perfectly every time.
Besides, trying to talk with that will sound like you're slurring your speech with a mouthful of cum, so you're gonna get arrested for driving while gay, anyway.
A chewimg gum company produced gum for the sole purpose of beating a breathalyzer and it worked, almost every country banned it. Look into what I'm walking about, Colgate made a mouth wash that does the same thing.
Sauce? That sounds quite interesting.
I tried to find it but I can't, it was in the early 2000s and I get the feeling the breathalyzers used now are probably just too good to be tricked by what I assume would be chemical masking.
You can still get mouth wash that will beat roadside mouth swab drug testing though.
>No officer, that's just my very expensive set of braces
I'd rather dui than look like a dragon in front of a cop
potassium chloride salts react with ethanol, so if you're about to be breath tested, stuff your mouth full of it and exhale through that.
if the cops ask you what's in your mouth, tell them it's dried semen.
Then die of a massive heart attack/seizure after the potassium is absorbed through the millions of small blood vessels in your mouth.
You know that lethal injections kill people by potassium, they just give narcotics before so you're out and don't suffer, right ?
ever great man to ever walk the earth was an alcoholic
Having a mouthfull of activated carbon actually helps. Tad impractical tho.
Or you believed a hoax.
The cop might suspect something when you breathe fire at him
This is a shit idea but I'd encourage it to any person retarded enough to drink-drive.
This desu. I don't know of anything that fucks your ability to drive more, save for high dose dissociatives and psychs.
My liver is augmented
The concentration of ethanol in your breath is too low to combust
>a device in your mouth that could combust some of that Ethanol
pic related
I too watch Rick and Morty. PICKLE RICK MY MAN XDDDD
Or just don't drive while intoxicated. There's that option as well.
They are supposed to watch you to make sure you don't take anything out of your mouth for several minutes prior to the breathalyzer test, so this would work, provided you just removed it from your mouth right before the test. Then they'd need to re-start the observation period, which, depending where you were on the alcohol curve, might get you under the limit. This wouldn't be valuable because of all the electro-BS, but just because you pulled something from your mouth. It would also work if you just had a big alcohol capsule you chomped down on, like the tooth in Dune, as that would fuck the test all up and show your blood as 100% alcohol or some shit.
These threads are always the best on Sup Forums
Sleep deprivation or using a cell phone is way more dangerous.
>so you're gonna get arrested for driving while gay,
kek
>"Oh officer honey, I hope you don't will have to punish me now..."
You see Sup Forums there are drunks who dig ditches and there are drunks who run data centers
A bite capsule of genetically modified bacteria the metabolize alcohol then die shortly after.
How could the R&D get funded though?
If you're drunk enough to get pulled over, you shouldn't be driving in the first place.
If you can't hold your alcohol (not start acting like a slob), you shouldn't be drinking.
People might want to drink at work and take the train home.
>Alright son, do you know why I pulled you over? I need you to take a breathalyzer test
>Sure thing offic- *breaths fire*
That will go well
fpbp
and don't forget -> in your lungs
this
dude just make a fire in your mouth lmao
What if you breathed through your nose instead? Would the alcohol still be in your breath?
Alcohol also comes out through your sweat too. Everybody can smell it.
don't forget the piss catheters or the "pee dust" thread
>living in a city full of minorities
>activated carbon
Enjoy that DUI OP
How about a device that filters out the ethanol before you drink? That way, you do not have to do anything complicated inside your body.
pic related
*tips fedora*
A tall glass of vodka?
water
which is what alcohol minus the ethanol is
Beer and such have more than ethanol.
Water is for pussies. Yuo are of pussy, tovarisch. To defeat breathalyser you need to perform integer overflow.
This, if you go above what the meter can measure it will go back to 0.
and it won't get you in trouble with a breathalyzer
kek
So you can just postpone the breathalyzer test until you've sobered up by taking something out of your mouth every few minutes?
Even if not, do you think an officer will be okay with just plugging the breath tube in your nostril?
>THE TOOTH
>remember the TOOTH
You can refuse to blow roadside and take one at the station or purposely fuck it up enough times that you could probably kill 2 hours until they arrest you and force you to take a blood test.
Which they need to call a qualified nurse out for lest they give you an embolism and kill you
No. If you fuck around with the pigs too much they will just auto-fail you and you will face whatever administrative punishment there is in your state for refusing to blow. Which in some cases is better than being charged with an OUI but they also don't need chemical test results to convict you in front of a jury.
When I was arrested they refused to give me a blood test despite ems being there. They made me blow and when I wasn't able to push enough air into the machine they auto-refusal'd me.
If you're operating a self-driving car but the car is is driving itself, can you get a DUI?
The legal answer is "yes" for two reasons: you are still technically operating it even if you're not driving it yourself. The other reason is because the government makes waaaay too much money on DUIs for them to simply go away because of self-driving vehicles.
>Sssssssssseeee.... Iiioooldyaimsoooooobr *hic*
>be police officer
>pull over a guy who is swerving all over the place
>Okay sir I'm going to need you to blow into this tube
>man appears to be chewing something
>if you'll just spit out your gum si-
>man opens his mouth
>I have just enough time to see sparks jumping in his teeth before he vomits fire at me
>i dive to the ground and feel the heat singe my hair
>hear my partner shout "jesus christ" and a volley of gunshots
>we're both okay somehow
>lunatic has been put down
>promise my partner I'll buy him a beer for that one
>headline of the paper next morning "crazed 'dragon man' assaults police with tongue mounted flamethrower"
I imagine for the first couple generations of self-driving cars, once all the legislation around it has been cleared up, you will have to be sober and ready to drive in case an emergency pops up and you end up having to take manual control
Then once a generation or three have passed and a lot of people don't even bother learning how to drive, it will no longer be mandatory
Oh I think the trajectory is a little different.
>first generation self driving cars require you to be alert and ready to control them and have a license
>second generation don't and most people don't bother getting licenses
>third generation some cars will come without manual controls
>fourth generation you need to pay extra for manual controls
>fifth generation manual controls are outlawed because they can be misused, only manual cars are for enthusiasts on closed tracks and aren't street legal
When do we get to have cars that ride along on metal rails like those amusement park rides?
>you will face whatever administrative punishment there is in your state for refusing to blow
taken out of context...
yea right, what next, outlawing horses on the road? the thing roads for designed for?
a passive catalyzer which functions appreciably at human body temperature while not being deathly toxic.
Or you know, you can just flamethrower the cop after smashing that bottle and deciding its time to get Mcdonalds
Kill me
kek
What's bad about that?
I put some cheap ass Bankers Club gin through a Brita filter. Came out tasting kind of like cognac.