/cum/ - Canada United States Mexico

My Life Right Now Edition

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First for I wish I were white

fuck the jannys edition

about to submit my resignation
oh boy my heart is pounding

what are you resigning from?

>there are people that will be in this thread that have never seen the ocean

Must suck to be landlocked

y?

Why?

>mfw hot cocoa

The ocean smells like shit tb h

I only post from my humble cottage in switzerland these days, friends

keep that in mind

...guys???

>the ocean smells like shit

Kys lubber

I don't like having nigger lips

I want to be Mel Gibson

>canada

Oakland, the Oakland of the world.

That sucks ha

Queen of /cum/.

Yeah It does

>Be sailor
>Be gay
The closer you are to the ocean the gayer you are
hmm how curious

Oh man, this november will be a f*cking mess.

>be Oakland
>get Vegas'd

I literally just blackmailed my sister into giving me $5 or I'd tell mom that she eats food on the brand-new couch

...

>he didn't blackmail his sister for sex

Shitter

You're either underage or a huge, huge asshole of an adult.

Sailors aren't gay. They fuck port whores and sometimes manatees pretending they are mermaids. Motorboat seamen are gay.

Also, remeber the age old adage: "It isn't gay if underway."

Only $5?

You're not maximizing the situation

You have to be at least 18 years old to post here.

What kind of India tier body of water have you been to? kek.

tutoring

Received a grant to work on a thing. Also, they keep expanding my hours and asking me to tutor a greater number of subjects.
I know a lot of people are unemployed and would say that I'm a dick for leaving a comfy job, but the opposite extreme is also kind of shit. I lose a lot of my productive time during the day and I don't want that to go on as the semester closes.

from a certain flag, no longer post. maybe.

but still i have a knowledge of your cunning, tovarisch

>there are people in this thread who've never gone whale watching
>they've never dined on fresh lobster after returning to land

Wtf a post on here hasn't hurt me in a long time

Thanks, jerk.

lobster has got to be one of the most overrated foods in existence

doesnt mean it's not good

>Be seaman
>Pronounced "Seemen"
Just like Semen

>Sailors aren't gay

San Fransisco smelt like garbage
New York was stinky too
But New Orleans was alright

it's okay

I wouldn't really go as far as to call it "good"

Why would it be hard to resign? No need to shake qt

Navy seamen are pretty fucking gay actually

Poor Urkel

well that's because you have a leaf on your flag

>San Francisco

Isn't that the public shitting capital of the USA though?

Hello friend

Can I have Canadian gf

What's the tidal range where you are? In places with sandy beaches and small tides it only ever smells like the salt air. In places with rocky shores and extreme tides the low tide has a light smell of rotten fish and seaweed. Of course real men love this smell.

This

Fuck you and your retarded palate. Unless you're a naughty 19th century child or indentured servant then close your mouth about lobster.

I just said motorboat seamen, like those in the Navy are gay. Sailors are not

LA is worse, but it's pretty bad.

Just bought my first longpig from Indonesia, will let you know how it tastes.

Idk, they already lack tutors for specific physics and CS subjects, so I feel like I'm taking liberties with my supervisor.

>going whale watching
Surely you're joking me.

Uhhh...

About 5 centimetres

>long pig. noun. (obsolete) human flesh eaten by cannibals. translation of a Māori and Polynesian term.

What the fuck, Canadians????

The difference between motorboat seamen and """sailors""" is that """sailors""" pretend their boats don't have a motor hidden in the stern

If I wanted to go whale watching I'd just eat Lobster at the same restaurant as you.

>i have not been whale watching

Not everyone lives in parts of America where whale sightings are the norm

It was pretty fun, saw some seals too
took you a whole 10 minutes to come up with that one?

Canada: Just Fucking Why, the Literal Country

Only if you want a landwhale, 40-60 y/o, that's the most common kind I see with dindus where I live.

Maisie

>Seeing a whale from a boat is impressive

Honestly jealous.

t. landlocked flyover

I just opened the thread now you gay fat fuck.

...

sure kid, whatever floats your boat

Pathetic

Here we average 914cm twice a day (semi diurnal tide) The water floods and ebbs about 6 feet an hour.

>needing a motor

Lolno, what's the fucking point then?

I live near a river that flows into a bay

Because dummy

>Unfavorable winds
>Get sent out to sea
>Die

Whereas if you have a motor you can escape getting stranded

I see the ocean every single day, projecting faggot.

>never seen the ocean
You can be landlocked and have seen the ocean.

It's a lake

Oh, and I see mountains of gold everyday

I dont get it

get fucked

Or, you can just reef sails, throw out a storm jib, and grow a pair of balls

Sounds swell, where?

youtu.be/-_ojy-fgNPA

under your moms bra

>Implying people would take risks
The old adage: Better safe than sorry

Why is North America so comfy lads?

I am still so, so sorry you live in the central valley.

what

>lads
Certainly no thanks to you.

>lads
it was all you baby

You'd prefer to be a bud? Then you would grow up into a leaf.

You didn't think that one through user.

do you have your costume prepared for tomorrow /cum/?

you are going out right

1.) Not a big risk with EPIRB, PFD, SAR vest with pencil flares, float plan, hydrostatic release auto inflate life raft, etc
2.) Taking risks is often the point
3.) Nothing worse than an exclusively fair weather """"sailor""""
4.) Strenth through adversity

I'm fairly certain that's the river walk in Pueblo, Colorado. That's a landlocked prairie/desert whale.

I'm spending Halloween on /x/

Most sailors I've met were amateur pleasure sailors

Also fuck off

>Ask hooker over the phone to have unprotected sex with me
>She says yes

>lads
FYL

Well?

Fascinating
Here we mostly have minkes and right whales.
>tfw never been prarie whale watching

Someday I will charter a cruise through the four corners area and see these magnificent creatures.

I said no

>amatuer pleasure sailors

So yachting? That's not really sailing, better than motorboating, but not by much.

Also, no

You will make a strong leaf one day bud.

Then why ask her?

I was trolling

W-what if I'm handsome nig???