/cric/

England vs Sri Lanka, 1st Test, Day 3

>England 298
Bairstow 140
Hales 86

>Sri Lanka 91
Anderson 5/16
Broad 4/21

>Sri Lanka 1/0 (follow-on)

Also there are some meme20s on that literally no one gives a fuck about.

Other urls found in this thread:

archive.4plebs.org/sp/thread/60982545/#60983322
archive.4plebs.org/sp/post/60908184/
static.espncricinfo.com/db/DOWNLOAD/0000/0045/ftp_2015_2019.pdf
theprogmind.com/author/gallifreymusicreview/
twitter.com/NSFWRedditVideo

Zero

Goose

Posting in a daniel thread

>England enforced the follow on

Why did they do this lads?

Sanga is literally one of the most insightful and well-spoken people in cricket and English obviously isn't even his first language.

Listen to the MCC Spirit of Cricket (or whatever its called) speech he gave a few years ago, you can probably find it on cricinfo. It's an interesting listen about Shit Lanka's cricketing history.

"Sri Lanka are winning" - Daniel

"Usman Khawaja doesn't open" - Daniel
"BJ Watling is the best gloveman in the world" - Daniel
"Brian Lara was overrated" - Daniel

Cricket is straight

ty

"Ivana is a babe" – Daniel

Good day sir, my name is Daniel.

I’m a 20 year old New Zealander (annexed-Australian for you Big Strong Americans). I watch cricket every day, and spend my time perfecting my PUA techniques and reviewing music from superior black metal bands (Burzum, Alcest, Deafheaven)

I train with my copy of The God Delusion every day, this superior piece of literature can disprove the fallacy of religion and, coupled with my IQ of 250, means that theists cannot keep up with me in intellectual debate. I earned my fedora two years ago, and I have been getting better every day.

I shitpost fluently, both /cric/ and the /rug/ dialect, and I memewell as well. I know everything about mechanical engineering and their virginity code, which I follow 100%

When I get my visa, I am moving to England to attend a prestigious Durham county game to learn more about their magnificent cricket club. I hope I can become Ivana’s boyfriend or finally make my car stop stinking!

I own Durham whites, which I wear around town. I want to get used to wearing them before I move to England, so I can fit in easier. I shitpost Australians and curries, and say “tbqh” as often as I can, but rarely does anyone manage to respond tbqh.

Wish me luck in England!

fuck i lol'd, first time i've seen this

Based Peru

Hi guys! Remember me?

Hey~ P/a/kibro!

Fuck off Gujju

obsessed

>(You) are the only white person in /cric/

feels bad mang

>tfw no chink gf

Why live

>Why live
Might as well m8

t.Chink

Are app itna bura mat bolo yaar.

top kek, how have I missed this?

Is Steven Finn related to Huckleberry Finn?

was that a script you used to get the 666etc get?

Nope. I don't use a script.

I'm pretty fair skinned

So guys, I've been stalking this Ivana slag on fb and we've actually got quite a few mutual friends with her.

My plan is to get one of my mates to introduce me to her, and woo her over. Being /fit/ and possessing a 8.4 GPA, this should be no great challenge. Once I have made her my gf, I will spend whatever time I have in her social circle, cucking Daniel. Every single time he's around, I will stick my tongue deep down her throat, and make eye contact with him THE WHOLE TIME. I will then drink a glass of /milk/ once I'm finished, never taking my eyes off Daniel, before teaching my new gf the virtues of thrash metal and the greatness of Yorkshire Cricket Club.

>implying this isn't the best daniel pasta

au/sp/ie posters
poopeeland pseudotrips
Fairweather poms
threadcounter threads
Slowkush
Paki weeb
Trinilad

Yep, /cric/ is back.
Rev up those memes.

Mere gore bhai!

Kaise ho? /desi/ mein se ban ho gaye ho kya?

I don't post in /desi/, mate.

archive.4plebs.org/sp/thread/60982545/#60983322

>this whole fucking thread
>daniel being so fucking beta
>statscunt projecting endlessly

I unironically miss those days

Statscunt has produced some good material

The krazykrezja's fresh, insightful musings starter pack

>playing armchair selectors
>whining about ICC's treatment of the Associates
>_________ is literally [Australian domestic player] - tier
>James Anderson is shit
>extended wanking over Starc and Hazlelanklet

Literally rinse and repeat every single night.

Bros, I want to become an e-celeb like Ankush. What should I do? Any gimmicks?

>there is literally nothing wrong with Australian batting
>THERE IS LITERALLY NOTHING WRONG WITH AUSTRALIAN BATTING
>THERE IS LITERALLY NOTHING WRONG
>WITH AUSTRALIAN BATTING

KEK, has krazykrezja killed himself by now? Wouldn't be surprised if he did Tbh. Not only did he see his precious "GOATven GODTH"'s "cuckptaincy" get eviscerated today, his precious talisman Meme Shit got completely EXPOSED like the cowering wimpering failure that he is. That fucking cowardly limpdick cunt. Seriously, you can statpad all you like on Poo Peelian roads - don't mean a thing if you can't score 150 on >MUH POSTAGE STAMP GROUNDS. I mean, even Pakistan scored more. Unironically.

Not that he actually watched the game. His civil servant job prevented him from watching the NZGOD demolition kek. What he WILL do is furiously play armchair selector on reddit, and beat the shit out of his half-abo gf to feel like a big man today. And come out here all guns blazing only to retreat when his poodentity gets exposed. Kek. Retreating, just like that cowardly cuckold disgusting waste of life Meme Shit.

Don't forget sydney grade cricket man, that's like his fucking catchphrase.

And he doesn't whine about the ICC's treatment of the associates, he literally wants them to shit on them even more. He literally agrees with Srinivasan's policies and the Big 3 for no other reason than to be contrarian.

Ankush is literally a shit tier meme celeb, he's not even slightly relevant

Slightly unrelated but I distinctly remember just before the >60 thread a whole fuckton of ACBs spammed >WIN THE TOSS WIN THE MATCH and 2-2 CONFIRMED after Clarke won the toss and batted first. Still think that is one of the ultimate examples of ACB ashes casualness, especially after what happened in the previous test.

>Cuck won that toss

fuck I had completely expelled that memory from my brain

delete this Daniel

holy fuck just found it in the archive

>it was thread #60

pottery

absolute pottery

archive.4plebs.org/sp/post/60908184/

Congradugalation

>tfw you're the only amerindian in /cric/'s history

Wait no I got it mixed up, Clarke won Edgbaston toss whoops, it was that thread that had all the "dude bat first and we'll win" casual spamming.

>you now remember that we thought 136 all out was bad

>ywn dox Daniel for the first time again
>ywn discover that he was a fedoracore atheist
>ywn see statscunt match with Ivana on tinder again

>ywn see statscunt match with Ivana on tinder again
Kek when did that happen?

That wasn't statscunt that was some other guy, he went around calling himself "wildcard" for a while

Tbf Australia had absolutely dominated England at Lords just before

>tfw we never got an ending to the daniel/ivana/wildcard arc
/rwc/ was good times

Yeah but there was tons and tons of talk about how England were preparing a super seamer between the tests. remember the weed house lamps that they put on the pitch to make it green? It was never a bat first wicket

Are people here still falling for the r/cricket copy pasta meme?

BIG

Yes, too many people still unironically reply to those

BIHARI

If Dushmantha Chameera was a single organism composed of cells from different zygotes he'd be Dushmantha Chimera

If Dushmantha Chameera was a hybrid of a lion, a goat and a snake he'd be Dushmantha Chimaera

If Dushmantha Chameera was a grill, xe would be Dushmantha meera xD

What series is /Cric/ looking forward to most this season?

What is there?

>Eng v SL
>Eng v Pak
>WI v Ind (lol)
>Zim v NZ (lol)
>SA v NZ
>SL v Aus

Have I missed any?

Out of those, the only remotely interesting one is >us versus SA, especially given we just leapfrogged them in the meme rankings. Will be interesting to see if they've been completely exposed or only slightly

Oh, and England-Pakistan will be interesting obviously, but that relies on Amir being good again

That actually was me and we didn't match.

SA v Aus

I think Pakistan will be competitive vs England. They still have Misbah and Younis and Yasir will be back bowling. They could give England problems

The moment Misbah or Younis get out the whole batting lineup is going to collapse

Pakistan are unironically worse in England than Australia if that's even possible.

Not that boreblock matters anyways. Well, unless you're an old man or a closeted shut-in.

Is that in SA or Aus? I didn't list the Summer tours because I don't think they're confirmed yet. Aus are rumoured to be hosting SA and Pakistan right? And we've got SA and Bangladesh I think.

Also, there was some rumour of >us playing India as well right? That can't end well.

>Pakistan are unironically worse in England than Australia
Haha wow. You do realise that Pakistan literally played Australia IN ENGLAND and fucking dominated them right?

Shehzad,Hafeez,Azhar and Sarfraz are all decent batsman who can score big numbers if those 2 fail, not to mention the last time Amir played in England he was wrecking cunts

1-1 is not a domination. The last time Pakistan played in England they were bowled out for under 100 about 4 times.

If I bought a baggy green and wore it around town, would people from Murrica make fun of me?

Look forward to the WI v India series.
As soon as Kohli nears 400 I will tackle him.

Could you bring a meme sign which contains statscunt's autistic rant about Kohli's test record and try and get it on camera?

>I don't think they're confirmed yet
they are 'confirmed' years in advance, it's just the actual dates that don't get released until closer to the event

you can see all upcoming series here upto 2019 i think static.espncricinfo.com/db/DOWNLOAD/0000/0045/ftp_2015_2019.pdf

The dates for South Africa and Pakistan touring AUS have already been released. The only undecided is if the Adelaide Test vs SA will be a D/N Test

Yeah I know about the FTP but there have been several cases of boards just ignoring it

Most of them india mind you

>tfw can't be part of the live discussion cause I'm always watching the replay when the day is over
It's like the exact opposite of real nigga hours over here

what time is the game on for you?

comfy 8pm start for >us

It's like 5am to 12pm. I don't want to wake up at 11am and miss half the day so I end up just watching the replay in its entirety. I'm way too autistic when it comes to this stuff

it's fucking hot lads

no

Out of the 3 countries that are being featured in the tri lateral series, which one is the most vacation friendly? Thinking about taking the trip in June tb h

Mainly cloudy with outbreaks of rain, perhaps heavy for a time during the afternoon with brisk southwesterly winds. Some brightness is possible later. Feeling pleasant in sheltered areas with winds easing.

RIP Sri Lanka

>80 posts
>14 posters

Nice """""poomunity"""" lads

I was on /cric/ in 2012. If you weren't here by 2013 then consider yourself a fucking casual newfag fresh off the boat reddit tier fag

I literally made the first ever /cric/ thread before the olympics, before zerogoose and before flags

Imagine being so unlucky you were born in poo peeland with poo-tier poo peeland "genetics" and were forced to poortake in poopular poo peeland "sports" like thugby yawnion. You would be eternally literally furious with small man syndrome, a massive inferiority complex, and be on 24/7 damage control mode.

Should just poommit pooicide tbqh.

why is /cric/ obsessed with poo?

I literally entered your subconsciousness mind and directly influenced you to make that thread after my original thought faggot

shut the fuck up daniel

You are literally the worst poster on /cric/. Worse than autistic memespouter, worse than Obesitygoose, worse than that trap spammer. You contribute nothing of value apart from samefagging your own retarded shitty life, making it seem as if this board is obsessed with you but literally no one gives a fuck.

You have a shit degree, a shit lifestyle, a shit physique, a shit taste in music and a shit personality. And don't even get me started on that superiority complex. Why you even post here is beyond me - it seems nothing more than an extended exercise in masochism, to be honest.

So seriously Daniel, unless you have anything important, anything noteworthy, anything of even less value than that civil major, kindly do us all a favour and don't speak.

I've never had a problem with blocking out yorkers, in fact it often increases my confidence because they're some of the only deliveries I can block 10 times out of 10. Anything hitting top of off and I'm fucked.
But I wouldn't take any advice I have for you given that my entire batting technique revolves around blocking and not getting out

>this flag
>obsessed with poo

Your """"country"""" is directly responsible for 99% of the scat porn market since porn was sold and distributed

>before the Olympics
If you mean just before, as in, the same year, then you're wrong.
/cric/ has been around since AT LEAST 2010. The first series I remember having dedicated threads on Sup Forums was the 2010-11 Ashes series, but I wouldn't be surprised if there were even earlier ones.

Daniel is the epitome of classic textbook technique and power hitting. The key aspects of his batting game are his fantastic front foot driving ability and a strong backfoot game characterised by a trademark Daniel pull shot through midwicket. The secret to his clean hitting is the shape he maintains during and after hitting those big shots. Even while he plays outrageous strokes, like the flat-batted swipe over the bowler's head, he manages to stay quite composed. His arms, shoulders and torso are always firm, rarely losing shape.
Daniel holds several fourth grade Auckland records in 50 and 20 over games. Some of them include, the highest 50 over score in a run-chase, highest one day international score by a virgin batsman, highest 50 over batting average of all virgin opening batsmen who have scored over 1000 runs and highest 20 over strike rate of all opening batsmen who have played over 30 matches.

>you will never see an opening partnership of Cock and Warncuck going 500 off 923 balls
Why live

Cricket, to me, is an epic. It is unlike any other sport. Every single match is like a total battle between two teams, with battles within battles all over it. As Ian Chappell said, cricket is not a team sport, it is an individual sport played in groups. It is the sum of one team versus the sum of the other. I love seeing the epics unfold as certain bowlers take on certain batsmen, across overs and days and even weeks in a series.

T20 is shit. Sometimes I have to walk around it and be like "eh it's okay" as to not offend people but being brutally honest, it's fucking garbage. It's all luck and power, there's no grace or subtlety or finesse. Cricket is elegant and smooth and skilful. T20 is brash and crude and juvenile. Whenever I watch a T20 I see no slips, no catchers, no interesting tactics. I see a bowler bowling a rank full toss, a batsman slashing aimlessly at it and getting caught. A bad ball, a bad shot - a wicket. It's almost always like that. A good ball in test cricket is beautiful. A good ball in T20 is one that flies sideways out of your hand and knee height to the batsman, but it's okay because in his wild heave he missed it.

Are you the BSA in the faces of /cric/?

Who /PROGRESSIVEROCKOFSPORTS/ here?

To me, cricket is insanely unique and all of the uniqueness in it is in Test cricket and only test cricket. ODIs are this lame middle ground that honestly manage to be even worse than T20s at times. If you want wild swinging for the hills and bowlers deceiving batsmen with pace, watch baseball. Seriously, there is basically no difference between T20 and baseball. You want ""tight finishes"" watch basketball. T20 is an attempt to make cricket like every other sport on the planet and it sucks all of the things that make it unique and beautiful out of it. Imagine if golf made all the holes 2m wide and the courses 3 holes long. Imagine if tennis changed scoring to first to 10 rally wins is the winner. Imagine if rugby removed the penalty goal. Cricket shouldn't be about explosions and cheerleaders, because there are so many other sports that do that stuff so much better. Cricket is about tea and strike rates of 42 and leaving the ball and Alastair Cook and seam positions and how many slips you need and complex fluid dynamics. That's why I like it. And for the record, I'm not an old fart. I'm 19.

Yes and there haven't been any faces added since me :(

Hump Fat Gay Ltd

Fuck I forgot about this.

theprogmind.com/author/gallifreymusicreview/

>The progression of Katatonia over their ten studio albums has been one of the most consistently gradual shifts in sound from any band I know. While it’s evident that their doom metal focused early material differs greatly from the alt-metal angst of the early 2000’s or the atmospheric mood rock of their recent material, it seems that with each album the band just push ever-so-slightly in one direction, it’s never in leaps or bounds. A new Katatonia album always brings comments of “man, they never seem to change at all”, yet it is the minuscule changes that contribute to a discography-long evolution, and The Fall of Hearts, in its own tiny little ways, contributes to this movement.

>“man, they never seem to change at all”

Daniel Eloquent Music Reviewing Pty Ltd.