Write tomorrow's headlines for the country above you

>Write tomorrow's headlines for the country above you

>Katy Gallagher sued for sexism

>(nobody knows how to read)

>Most retarded country

>Wall still not built

>Trump claims the wall killed Castro

Everybody hates Murica.

>After Trump victory, Americans buying never used French WW2 rifles.

>Polish Defense Minister begs America for protection for 750th consecutive day

>Shinzo Abe admits that Nangking was a Mistake

earthquake/tsunami hits x-shima

>President of Sri Lanka shuts down everything.

>United european army will destroy this cunt.

>IT'S RIGGED: Recount of votes and investivigation soon

>name change referendum passes, country changes its name to Independent Onesia

jokowi legalises mugging, wifebeating and torture of small harmless animals and birds

>Melbourne surpasses 50% ethnic Chinese population for first time, Sydney closing in

>Turnbull: "To balance the Arab refugee, we the Indonesian one"

>'Like That’ program a chance to explore gender and sexual identity through drag

>PM Trudeau announces plan to let migrants lodge in his own house

>Trudeau said leaf in canada flag is such oppresing act, need to be changed

>Invasion to France and Italy is began now by bundeshwehr to acclaim more land for refugees

>Poland invades Germany

>Neil Bantleman found guilty of child rape charges despite absolute void of evidence
>Indonesian Supreme Court sees "nothing wrong" with accepting large bribes from parents of children at the International School where Bantleman taught

>Kardashian fart killed castro and kanye

Prime Minister's wife caught in yet another sex scandal with Barack Obama.

"I honestly don't mind" says Prime Minister Trudeau.

>China annexes Australia

>SOLD! Quebec is China now.

>It's not safe anymore and Nicaraguans hope the US invade them soon

>Mexico builds a giant taco at the U.S.-Mexico border to show solidarity to america, then falls on american side that end up killing half of the american population by accident.

Mexico planning on building wall on U.S. border to stop wave of refugees fleeing U.S. after Trump election.

>Giant Emu Kills 3 in Adelaide. PM declares war.
>Maradona: "Si las Malvinas tuvieran selección y les hubiésemos jugado, los ingleses ya no nos joderían por ellas"
>200,000 Transexual prostitues in Bangkok infected with AIDS, latest research confirms.

President Ortega apologizes for the Nicaraguan Revolution.
ISIS leader Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi disavows Kupang Bomber.
10 reasons why its better to save the extra thousand and move to Canada.
Future King found dead in Bangkok.

>Military: "How many Coup have we done?"

>Thailand's upcoming partyboy King hosts Thailand's first national "How many ping pong balls can you fit up there?" competition

My sides are in orbit now. Based leaf.

...

"That's it - last Thai man converted to tranny''.

>Top 10 legal routes to US

>Most Russian Parliament Members supported Russian intervention in Syria because they though it is one of Ukraine region

>Trudeau's career shattered after the discovery that he cant speak French
"I always assumed he was speaking French,"says Governor General David Johnston,"I had no idea that all of Quebec knew of his translator."

>Horror as 300 Indonesian children on remote island were found dead as part of a sacrifice for a death cult.

Jakarta Now Biggest City On EARTH. 40 MILLION """inhabitants""" crammed in tiny concrete swamp.

>Frog plague spreads throughout rust bell
>Experts say caused by Trumps broken promises

>The only red and white colour flag is oppresing, need to be rainbow said canandian intellectuals

Funny thailand

Why Hillary supporters don't deserve free speech.

>Decreasing tourist into mexico is happened because they think they are arrived at ISIS region just because our beheading culture

Aceh Sultanate has declared Allegiance to ISIS, breaking off from "Kaffir-loving" Indonesia.

>That english.

President Nieto makes Guatemala pay for wall around Southern Border.

>Trudeau: "I am happy to be the father of my wife's son"

>People all over a country launched a celebration
>"1 000 000 000th time we were mistaken with Poland"

Vodka price at all-time low. Some suggest increasing Muslim population.

Florida man slaps alligator with his penis

and the alligator rip it off.

Trudeau: we're renaming the country to Peru

Spider bites Australian man on the penis again
oh wait that's last week headline

Chilean military annexes western coasts of Peru, Ecuador, and Colombia

chile comes second in international wine, beef and minerals competition to Australia yet again

>Chilean Scientist: "We have a way to clone Pinochet"

> Indonesian Scientists: Waadu (ablution) and Going to Mosque PREVENT Cancer!

>military coup against trudeau; bro-tier defense minister spearheading the coup

>Poo continues to remain outside the Loo

>Local Street Breaks Shit Record

>Archaeologists find 2000 year old toilet paper in mumbai, reportedly unused

>Attorney General Cleared of Corruption Charges, Court Finds SJWABCLGTBBQs Responsible

>Peter Dutton told to resign by the Guardian for the 700th time this week - still doesn't

>Cucking and Humiliation. Business as usual

Invasion of Poland cancelled, nothing of value there

>Germany officially becomes an Islamic Caliphate and will behead anybody who won't follow the Fatwa

>New Zealand remains irrelevant for another year

>Trudeau caught sucking off mystery man.

>Cannibalism rates at historic low - only 40% polled have tried human flesh before

>Mass shooting for last burger in local McDonald

>Local pizza "not bellissimo", experts say

>Half of our country is still controlled by kangaroosand dingo's
>Military urges to reconstruct the fence

Moscow Man Has Blood In Veins Instead Of Vodka - Doctors Baffled

Carjack surged to the record high - Upward trend maintained for 5 consecutive years.

4 women found dead with puffer fish in vagina. The video is now on Pornhub, and it's hot

Ireland annexed by British government. Supposed genocide to come.

Justin Trudeau is dead. He won.

...

"1 dead and 5 wounded during knife attack in Tokyo subway"
"Cornwall deputy calls 'Labour party gimmicks and lies' when referring to new dispute involving the removal of army base in his county"
"Check page 5 for Mr. Trudeau secret poutine recipe"
"Cape Town touristic boom, we present you with investment possibilities"
"Why Perth will lead Australian development in the years to come?"
"Ten things you didn't know about Donald Trump"
"Surrealist movie 'Haus' premiered in Augsburg"
"Cancún is chosen the best destination in Mexico according to Japan magazine Nihon Today"
"Can Alexis lead Chile to glory?"
"Why Malang is the best city to live in Indonesia?"

These are all realistic and not funny at all

I'm sorry, I'm not that witty today.

"Favelado's use makeshift artillery to attack a nearby gated Rio community, 45 dead"
The next days edition:
"How Brazil is rapidly becoming first world"

>Shart-in-mart epidemic in New York malls. ''I just couldn't wait anymore so i sharted here'' said one costumer who sharted in a mall in Manhatten without shame on his face

>New York
>Malls
Doubt.jpg

>Millions of people fight each other for cheaply made Chinese goods

>not knowing about Manhatten mall

Love how Americans are reacting to Trump more than we reacted to Brexit when Brexit was by far a bigger decision.

> london mayor announces campaign to moving beer pubs outside of city

>"Russians aren't white according to new research."

Sometimes me thinks that we are not different at all.

You are all faggits.

38kg explosives found in wooden shoes