/heem/: rare footage of someone from dagestan losing edition

Upcoming events:

6/4: EFN 49: Bratislava
6/4: UFC 199 (Bisping vs Rockhold 2)
6/10: Titan FC 39 (Cavalcante vs Healy)
6/12: Pancrase 278 (Sunabe vs Haita)
6/17: ONE FC (TBA)
6/17: Bellator 156 (Galvao vs Dantas)
6/17: EFN Global (Fedor vs Maldonaldo)
6/18: UFC FN 89 (MacDonald vs Thompson)
6/24: Bellator 157 (Jackson vs Ishii)
6/25: GLORY 31 (Vakhitov vs Bouzidi)
7/1: ONE FC (TBA)
7/7: UFC FN 90 (Dos Anjos vs Alvarez)
7/8: TUF 23 Finale (Jedrzejczyk vs Gadelha)
7/9: UFC 200 (DC vs Jones 2)
7/10: UFC Hall of Fame Inductions
7/13: UFC FN 91 (Ferguson vs Chiesa)
7/16: Bellator 158 (Kimbo vs Thompson)
7/23: UFC on Fox 20 (Holm vs Shevchenko)
7/24: Pancrase 279 (Ishiwatari vs Brookins)
7/29: Invicta FC 18 (TBA)
7/30: UFC 201 (Lawler vs Woodley)

Previous thread:

News:

>199 weighin procedure explained
mmafighting.com/2016/6/2/11827266/different-weigh-in-procedure-for-ufc-199-explained

>Diaz won't be fighting irish can
mmafighting.com/2016/6/2/11843138/dana-white-ufc-is-looking-at-another-fight-for-conor-mcgregor-that

>Honda 2017
mmafighting.com/2016/6/2/11841566/dana-white-ronda-rousey-gets-immediate-title-shot-upon-return-aiming

>Luke Rockhold is actually a samurai
i.4cdn.org/wsg/1464902739294.webm

Other urls found in this thread:

youtube.com/watch?v=dJAkdcmHels
mmafighting.com/2016/6/2/11827266/different-weigh-in-procedure-for-ufc-199-explained
youtube.com/watch?v=eR1rd34wqGw
youtu.be/eccUmVWLixw
twitter.com/SFWRedditVideos

/SCHAUB/ general?

h-hey

3rd for my boy forever Dominick Cruz

SCHAUB

Croatia's own Mirco Bispiocic will take the MW belt back home

FABER

>I'm a fucking Samurai

Real thread

GOAT hairline

>tfw Califorrinyaas own Urijah Faber is finally going to get his belt

I hope you're the sperg and are about to have an episode.

People who think Rockhold's performance was bad today need to go and watch Weidman's at the Unstoppable presser.

>"I'll rip your heart out"

>rare footage of someone from dagestan losing edition

someone post the footage of shahbulat shamhalaev getting gunned down

>Luke literally admitting he has a bum knee

Dropping a cheeky tenner on bisping

shut up

Shut up.

i dont care what u say hes still my boy

>Schaub

well, nothing can beat unstoppable in terms of cringeness, it was all around suicide tier

Howcome every OP now is an unfunny faggot who makes it 20 posts early

Lol it amazes me how luke beat both bisping and chris yet they both out embarrased him at press conferences

Be careful, /heem/

>tfw Urijah wins the belt

Yew'll dew nootin

it's worse for luke because he's supposed to be le cocky chad man but he unironically has autism.

>i-i'm a samurai

I don't get it either. He insists on making every thread. He thinks people care about having a million events that nobody looks at in the OP.

I have no idea where this myth of Rockhold being awkward became fact, but IMO it's complete bullshit.

People don't look at him objectively and are just jealous because he's good looking in addition to having so much else going for him. Their are some pretty bright guys in the UFC, and there are some absolute bricks, at least on camera.
He's definitely not awkward relative to other fighters. If anything he's well above average, but I love how people think that people like McGregor and Bisping are a cut above the rest intellectually because they're loud and obnoxious and come up with an occasional sound bite.

It's actually funny because if McGregor sounded like he does, but was a worse fighter people would be calling him a dumb, Irish prole.

But instead, since he's been relatively successful, people worship him like a god. I mean I have no ill will towards him or Bisping. I actually like them. They seem like good, honest dudes, but you can't tell me they're these social savants.

McGregor is always nervous as fuck doing press. He's jittery and anxious. When he's on a national TV / talk show like Jimmy Kimmel it's even worse. And Michael is just fucking loud, like McGregor. He talks over people and talks so fucking much.

People laugh because they guys talk without a filter, which is fine, but then why do we need to go back and retroactively declare them to be gods of the social sphere?

I mean, is yelling over someone "Have I been wrong yet? Have I been wrong yet?" really a sign of being well adapted socially? Personally, I think it's headed more in the direction of circus freak.

Not to mention they come up with one line or group of phrases and just continue to repeat them ad-nauseam until fight time.

Like McGregor's gazelle comments and Bisping talking about how every fight is different. No shit? If every fight was the same why would we even bother having a rematch?

That and talking about some fucking sparring match he's had years ago? Are you kidding me?

what would you consider funny

...

How will Bisping fare against an actual samurai?

>le cocky chad man but he unironically has autism.

makes me like him desu. truly one of us.

What a broke motherfucker. Look at those little arms.

That ain't the money fight.

looks average

Not him, but I prefer a variety of OPs [embed] instead of one autist making every thread. it should reflect all of the people who post here, not just the sperg who posts the thread early every time because of his autism.

holy fuck is this pasta or did you type all this autism out

this is my second favorite defensive nuthugger pasta after the begrudger one

How about instead of calling me autistic you answer my question?

Which fighters might be on the spectrum?

Rockhold
Rory

Luke Rockhold vs. Michael Bisping
Dominick Cruz vs. Urijah Faber
Max Holloway vs. Ricardo Lamas
Dan Henderson vs. Hector Lombard
Dustin Poirier vs. Bobby Green

Ryan hall.

Nick and Nate for sure

myles jury

>you now remember myles jury's sports psychology session which included holding a sword and pretending to be a king

>Rory
>might be on the spectrum
>might

Rory is the single most autistic athlete in professional sport history.

but being obnoxious and talking over people/not letting people talk over you is basically all the skill you need for these retarded banter circus shitshows

ie tyson fury, donald trump, etc

kek myles "that guy was easy" jury

ROCKHOLD
FABER
HOLLOWAY
HENDO
POIRIER

Why would he dominate yet ANOTHER Brazilian post-USADA? Everyone wins with Bisping.

Posted in last thread

>jury jiu jitsu

Rockhold via heem.
Cruz via UD.
Holloway via heem on third round.
Lumbard via heem.
Poirier.

lads dana is getting old..

youtube.com/watch?v=dJAkdcmHels

why spanish people hate brazilians so much?

the only place I was ever mistreated when traveling was in a spanish airport

...

I'm a fucking samurai, and I can siltently destroy any here

Bisping
Cruz
Holloway
Lombard
Porier

I'm not Spanish, but I assume everyone hates you. You guys are like a race of mongrel savages, y'know?

No offense.

faber sucks at talking shit so bad lmfao

>still calling Anderson the GOAT
nobody believes that anymore, right?

>, and
>siltently
>any here
Relax

Rockhold
Cruz
Holloway
Lombard
Porier

>199 weighin procedure explained
>mmafighting.com/2016/6/2/11827266/different-weigh-in-procedure-for-ufc-199-explained
Interesting desu ne

>What fighters do love about CSAC's new rules is getting to weigh-in earlier with more time to rehydrate. Dominick Cruz spoke about it during a recent episode of UFC Embedded. Luke Rockhold addressed it on The MMA Hour with Ariel Helwani on Monday. In the typical weigh-in procedure, fighters must stay on weight for hours waiting for the 4 p.m. weigh-in show. Not in California this week. They can wake up, cut the rest of the weight, step on the scale and they're done. They can begin eating and drinking again.
>"I'm excited about the weigh-in early," Rockhold said. "I think it's stupid to sit there and deprive yourself and wait for all this bullsh*t to go through and stay dehydrated and let your body keep sucking fluid from your brain. It's that downtime. Once you've made the weight, what's the point of sitting there just to please everybody? The PR side of things. It's not healthy. I think it's smart on their part."

>What will happen to the regular, television weigh-in fans are accustomed to?
>It won't go away and will largely be the same, according to UFC vice president of public relations Dave Sholler. It will remain at 4 p.m. Fighters will still pose on stage and square off with each other like the weigh-ins we're used to. The only difference will be that Joe Rogan will announce the weights that were previously recorded rather than the ones read from the scale right then and there.

yeah right Dom, go make some friends while Faber prepares to steal your belt

The "might be on the spectrum" list

Rockhold
Rory
Ryan Hall
Myles Jury
Nick
Nate

pls add


myabe Cruz? His best friend is his pupper and owns a fuck load of swords but he is quite charismatic.

You'll be the one relaxing after I triangle choke you from my rubber guard

Michael Bisping
Urijah Faber
Ricado Lamas
Hector Lombard
Bobby Green

sage
dana

I'm always relaxed. I keep it nice and flowy.

Stress=death

BJ Penn at 145lbs

>faber bigger than cruz

what is this delusion

Good list so far. Maybe DC? He's pretty fucking awkward

>Got BTFO so bad on the presser he couldn't even look up straight
Faber is a joke.

nah DC seems like a homely guy, could see him being a mall cop or something

Mihael Bisping
CruzMissile
Holloway
Lombard
Pooirier

Ferguson

*Cruz soft voice cracks*
"Im the BEsT AnaLySt in the world..."

I think spain is just not very pc for a first world country

Luke "I'm a samurai" Cockhold
Sir Dominicus of the Cross
Holloway
Henderson
Poirer

daily reminder to worship the goat

youtube.com/watch?v=eR1rd34wqGw

...

OFFICIAL 199 PRE-FIGHT PRESS CONFERENCE BANTER RANKINGS
>I'm here to embarrass the other guy with facts-tier
Cruz

>Getting frustrated with clearly better rival over a rubber match you'll lose, but occasionally funny-tier
Faber

>I can't win the fight so I'll try to clown on you-tier
Bisping

>Aye... bisping..bisping..I'm a fucking samurai-tier
Rockhold

>cruz mumbled some retarded shit about Dillashaw
Faber is going to destroy this fag

Re: the press conference

We should cut them some slack for being such goofs. They were 20hrs out from weigh ins so I bet they were all pretty light headed.

*pets dojo internally*

>ywn play mini putt with sage

Good shot Haha

tread lightly, /heem/

based hassyposter

Nobody really is that PC in Europe anymore desu. Except England, Sweden, France and Germany.

>Mumbled
More like coherently broke down Faber's entire career and his failures of touching the belt.

He's a loser and Dom exposed him. And will expose him Saturday once more.

>trying to have a conversation with an annoying autist
Faber
>h-hey bizbing bizbing
Rockhold

capped, anyone else wanna post some comments hating on faber so i can make a collage and goof on you

...

Dominick fucking destroyed Faber. He talked facts. In a coherent way while Faber was visibly shook. Sit the fuck down, you lardass motherfucker.

...

youtu.be/eccUmVWLixw

>daily reminder that you're all just AVERAGE BLOKES

Poirier
Lombard
Holloway
Faber
Rockhold

...

Capped yours. Imma laugh at your sad ass.

Best time for a press conference really