/brit/

a e s t h e t i c edition

youtu.be/W_rC-495Z_A

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A T H L E T I C

first for me

virgin walk
ˈvəːdʒJn wɔːk

noun
1.
A pattern of walking characteristic of someone who has never had sexual intercourse, typically manifesting as an uneven and self-conscious gait.


>2017
>still having the virgin walk
don't do it lads

doing a virgin post

I'll be hosting a special game for you all in 30 minutes ;)

delete this

Unironically get panic attacks when I walk into a lecture

>ywn live in a Biodome on the south pole and get into all sorts of shenanigans
youtube.com/watch?v=tIUU8o3L8-o

hello im here

could absolutely heem everyone of you runts

doing a virgin wank

seriously considering hiring a prozzie just for the purpose of curing my virgin walk lads

Thoughts?

>lol you nerds
>when you walk past a girl just have a slightly smug wry look on your face and look directly at them

>they get insecure as fuck and its hilarious

>make eye contact with a girl
>attempt to bluff
>manage to hold up for a few seconds
>finally lose control and break out into a full-on virgin stare
>see the sudden realisation in her expression
>she bursts out laughing and points me out to her friends
>they all notice my glaringly obvious virign stare as well
>know instantly that they're making fun of me for being a 23 year old virgin

brits are poofters

used to get this in secondary school, I'd always be late and whenever I got to the door I'd freeze up and panic.

I hated walking in and everyone stop working to look at you haha

don't, they make you wear a 'dom

>she's here

You're still a virgin, it's just like having a wank

>that one lad in lectures who always sits in the middle and tries to make the seats beside him as inviting as possible but everyone subconsciously avoids him so his entire row plus the seats directly in front and behind him are empty.

prozzies don't count
the only way to lose your virginity is to have unprotected vaginal sex to completion with a willing and attractive partner

T H I S

I stop breathing and everything wew

>banging on about lectures like they're something everyone has been to
nah actually some of us have jobs

>tfw virgin smell

>Canadians who posts in /brit/ thinking they're enjoyed or welcome

unironically walk weird around girls

this new gimmick is highly toxic for me

once sat behind a girl in a lecture and she dropped her pen somehow behind her chair so i picked it up for her and she said thank you

dropped out the next day

>This thread

you're not even 30 posts in and it's pathetic

who? me?
*points at myself while shrugging my shoulders*
*looks behind me to scan my surroundings*
*looks back at the person who yelled something*
*blushes*
are you talking to me?

>bruces still posting

*does the virgin stare*

foggy out

have claw hands and don't know how to hold them when I walk

>bruces still posting

*does the virgin whip nae-nae*

>walking down the road on my way home
>see group of girls walking towards me
>fuck.png
>start to cross road
>they also start crossing the road
>halfway across
>begin to panic
>abandon crossing the road
>turn back around and go back to the same side
>start walking again
>hear the girls shout mean degrading things to me
>start running home choking back tears

tfw I accidentally do the virgin existence

it works totally

girls can smell your fear, if you just look amused when you do it I garuantee you will get the results I described

you just need to not be excessively short or fat or ugly

if youre a virgin out of anxiety and shit, it's actually a good idea.

if you're a virgin for another reason, it won't do anything for you.

>come into lecture
>all the foreign types with their hooka pipes say waheyooo
>*walks like an Egyptian*

>doing the virgin walk unironically
mate

i lost my virginity to a buffting when i was 21 that's pretty much robot status

doing a virgin poo

Have I got the virgin lips lads?

doing a virgin cuba libre
*siiiiiip*

>tfw no bowlegged /brit/posting yank gf

shan't be giving my virginity to a whore, it shall be kept for me and me only

not sure you understood the essence of my hatpost

>screenshot of a picture

this

>tfw you get a photo with your friends and your virgin socks are showing

reee

hows that

What is the most films you've watched in a single day? My previous record was four but I might break that today.

>wake up
>the state of this thread

guess its back to bed

probably about 4 or 5 as well

>he virgin sleeps

doesn't seem odd you're trying to intimidate random bints you're walking past?

How the fuck do you call people up and ask them to write a reference?

Utter fucking shit tb h

>"Whats that user? you're still a virgin?"
>"I-I don't mind, I-I am t-too"
>"Be g-gentle"

...

in a bad mood today

reckon i'll be bad company so i won't be posting much

watched all 4 of the pirates of the Caribbean over the Christmas break with one of my mates

it was just me and him left in the university halls as everyone else had gone back for uni and we chilled out every night for 2 weeks watching films, playing pool and table football, and playing fifa on the xbox.

great times

Any virgin runts here?

I'm gonna kick your arse

virgins are shit at sex, male and female

>money saved from my last job is decreasing rapidly
youtube.com/watch?v=bbFg3rE-nsk

bit gay

Which ones did you watch? I might try and watch the last couple Tarkovsky films I need to see to try and motivate myself to stay awake.

>posts anime
KEK

could absolutely out sex you lad, would have you howling in a matter of seconds

how are girls shit at sex? they literally just lay still while I do all the work

Hahahaha how would you know if virgin men are shit at sex you fucking bender

when I did actually lose my virginity the girl was a virgin too but I pretended otherwise

not intimidate

its just a subtle form of banter by making them uncomfortable

@463
virgin

might start a giant puffball farm and market the puffball "steaks"

Sound bent

Did the exact same with a m8 of mine, but with Halo instead of Fifa

sound like a fucking creep 2bh

no wonder you still have the virgin alk

That means they're shit

t.virgin

Female virgins above 20 literally do not exist

;)))))))

rude
maybe im not communicating it properly but im not a creep by any means

bit gay

started howling lads

had a look at the time and just thought about all the normie wageslave runts working right now

haha fucking runts

yeah I know it sounds gay as fuck

so what do non-shite ones do?

not a virgin mate, I have a gf who I shag regularly

On the bus going to my shit office job again, ho hum might as well neck myself

sad you care enough though
those girls haven't given you more than a moment's thought

could beat anyone here in a running race

What did she mean by this?

*does a little dance*

Why not drive user? Surely your car is better than the bus.

t. still lives with his mum and everyone thinks he's a loser

thank god you didn't piss the bed at least

what u do bruz
get a coffee and a nice treat its going to be alright:)

thought of a really cracking ballbag post as i was going to sleep last night, but naturally i couldn't be fucked to get up and write it down, so it's gone to the realm of shit i've forgotten, alongside how to socialise and reasons to live

Unironically wake up at 7am every day despite being a NEET and am much happier than when I used to wake up at 2pm or later

-makes a little love-

dont care at all

pretty sure my brother suspects me of being an alt-rightist