Ask an astrologer anything

Ask an astrologer anything.

Is sucking dick a requirement of astrology?

why don't you kill your self you fucking retard, all of your gay shit is fake and your profession is a lie

Do you actually get paid?

How the fuck did you get that job? Was there some kind of "training" you had to have?

hows being homeless?

Fucking lost

I was born December 15th, 1989.

I am male.

What can you tell me? What does my future hold? Can you tell me anything about myself and personality?

explain to me how a human can flex their muscles
>how do they do it?

To be an astrologer, you must have an education in greek mythology or classic greek literature with a focus in mythology and at least a bachelor's in theology. Sucking dicks isnt something we do as astrologers but the zodiacs say you ask that question because you have an extensive background in that act... since you were 4 im guessing... with your cousin in the games closet at your aunt's house.

You're most likely a major faggot, sorry.

How does it feel to be in the gayest of all fields?

Have you ever met Tom Cruise?

So you're sayin' it's just a perk of your job then?

You speak as though you know me... yet you dont even know yourself. You struggle each day with two forces pulling you towards their way: your true desires ans the desires of those around you.
You cant accept other people because they arent meeting your expectations, yet you dont meet people's expectations.
Your struggle consumes too much of your own time.

It really depends. If you want to make a quick buck off people, you become a tarrot reader in some tiny store. If you want to examine people's situations, their abity to commune with the opposing forces and apply the history of heros to their motives and behaviors, then a lot of education in mythology and literature is required.

Homeless?
While I did move away from my hometown, I do have a house that I find very comfortable.

What the fuck asshole someone here acutally posts an astrology related question and all your posts are about you defending how you're not a fucking fraud.

Sounds like a great way to showcase what a fraud you are.

Have you seen Chef?

Your zodiac sign is sagittarius. While your element is fire, lately you havent been bringing too much warmth to others. Perhaps you should do some improvements on yourself so that positive energy gets absorbed by others.

Read books, exercise and eat well. Find peace with your mind. Dont lose the spark.

Humans flex their muscles because of tiny little muscle gnomes that live under our skin have gay orgies and our contractions are really them humping eachother. Why do you think you shake when you lift something heavy?

Your insecurities suggest you have something to say about you.

Surprisingly helpful.

Anything else you can add? I'd appreciate it.

Are there rings around Uranus?

You cheeky bastard

What a load of bullshit.

Not in relation to your sagittarius zodiac, but for improving yourself, dont be afraid to be somewhat selfish. You must learn to become good to yourself before you can be good to others, something very few people ever consider.

So the answer to whether you have a paying astrology job is "no".

That sucks. I found this surprisingly helpful.

Anything else I can contribute that will give me a better reading or whatever?

There are no rings around uranus but there are rings around your cock... and they vibrate

Is she even worth all this?

Why do you believe in and perpetuate pseudoscience?

Actual astrologers plot out the locations of all the heavenly bodies at the date of birth to give someone a fortune -- they don't just go by zodiac sign.

But I guess they didn't teach you that in your mythology class.

kek

>Astrology
>2016
>top kek

male
born 1990 oct 31
scorpio/horse
no direction in life felling like i should fade away
any advice?

August 26th 1990

male

>mah future?