Woke up this morning 5:30 sharp with a blowjob from two bitches, one was trying to fit my humongous 3 pound balls in her mouth while the other was choking halfway on my 18 and 318 inch dick. Must have came about a quart of sperm. They wanted more. cockslapped them unconcious. I had to hit the gym. Frontflipped from my 14th floor loft into my valet parked 2015 Ferrari (I got connexions) and gave the valet 3000$ in loose change. Pushed my shit to about 4 hundo (mph, mind you) and I was at the gym in no time. When I entered, the room scent suddently changed from sweat to wet pussy. That:s just the effect I have on hoes. Did my usual relax routine, 6000 push-ups, 8500 crunches, bench pressed 30 plates. etc. etc. you know the drill. After doing my shit in 16 minutes, my super strong senses got in action, I was smelling pussy. I looked up. and sure enough this fly honey was coming towards me. When i say fly. I mean that bitch was fine as a fucking umbrella. 18 years old. 44DD tittles on a tight fucking frame. I mean a real skinny bitch, the type you losers jack off to, she didnt weigh more than 5 pounds. Took out my trouser monster and she started to squirt hard, she was convulsing and having 6 orgasms at the same time. Then I gave it to her while all the guys were giving me high fives and all the hoes were on the floor squirting like motherfucking fountains. Made the slut beg for my cum, but I didnt give it to her to prove a point, I still came but only compressed air came out, imagine your best orgasm, then multiply it by 35. Didnt say nothing, hopped back in the Lambo and went back home. Now I'm sitting here, drinking 15 000$ champagne and eating gold plated sushis made by the 2 bitches from earlier. Its only 6:30 and I did more in 1 hour than you faggots will do your whole life. Enjoy jacking off to stupid drawn pictures.
Woke up this morning 5:30 sharp with a blowjob from two bitches...
ALTERED BEAST!
No way someone can do that many push-ups and crunches without dying. Like, you could probably do max 200 but no more than that.
10/10
top lel
"I still came but only compressed air came out".
LOOOOOOOOL
>5:30 sharp with a blowjob from two bitches
good for you man... enjoy your accomplishments..
Personally, i prefer to spend my time in a different way and prefer girls that are cute vs. "hot" so keep doing your thang barandangndang
such copypasta
wow.
it's 1 in the afternoon, mate, unless you live in the middle of the pacific ocean.
Multiply it by 35? that'd put you in a medical coma.
lrn2quote fgt
Hello, I'm Hans from Germany.
Can you tell me how you achieved all of this? Living your life is my dream. What do I have to do?
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>44DD tittles on a tight fucking frame
>44
>tight frame
lol you know that's the natural size for amazonians.
>that ending
did she died
>I mean that bitch was fine as a fucking umbrella
Okay, you got me..
If you are posting your achievements to Sup Forums I have to conclude that you are empty on the inside and need to collect the awe and envy of others to try and fill the void in your heart. Even with all your success you're still miserable because it's all fake shallow bullshit and no one knows you nor wants to. Your alone OP and no one will ever love you for you. They'll only love the things you do for them, buy them, etc. Not you though. You sad man.
Both people in this photo have Body dysmorphic disorder.
more like land whales
8/10, debble kek