Alright Sup Forums, time for some roleplaying. You're all trying to rob my house. Dubs decides what to do...

Alright Sup Forums, time for some roleplaying. You're all trying to rob my house. Dubs decides what to do. Can be as simple as "enter" or as detailed as "wait here for x amount of hours while doing etc". Anyone can ask questions. Good luck.

Well where the fuck are we for starters?

Remote location. Target house is in a typical suburban neighborhood. Mostly older residents, no one really goes outside much.

how likely am i to get shot

kell yourself

Slim to none. There's a cop down the street but he's only home during the day. Neighbors are all old nonviolent whitefolk.

Fuck OP to death

Around what time is this taking place or like do we choose when?

Up to you. Right now it's noon. 6 turns til sunset. Only counting dubs.

Scratch that, I'll make it 3.

what's the house's architecture? (storeys etc.)

1 story, 1,600 square feet. Living room and dining room are connected along with the kitchen on the left side where there's a 2-car garage. 3 beds and two baths on the right. Master bedroom's facing the street.

there's worse ways to go

reroll

Blow down the house with high explosives. White people be damned. Aloha Snackbar.

Rerolling for jihad justice

Kick in the door and kill all residents with a chainsaw.

Rerolling this

Rolling again

set the house on fire

Surprised this has not 404'd yet. OK, masturbate in fireplace, shit on OPs lawn

OP here, if this move makes it I will throw realism out the window and let it happen

Sharpie in pooper

Hitler did nothing wrong so he provides free jews 4 everyone

Im gonna fuck his wife.

we tie your family and rape your mom.

Find the nearest baby and throw it through the front widow

Window. Fuck.

Not married, I have a mom and dad though.

Also dubs. Make it happen.

Imma do it

>
>2x dubs

Holy shit. Anyways, you throw a baby through the front window. The glass breaks, but not the wire mesh behind it. Bummer. Now there's blood everywhere. Luckily I'm still staying at my college dorm and my parents are at work. There's a bush in front so most of the mess fell behind it. Neighbors don't care what happened, but you startled my two cats.

bruh did the same user just get dubs twice in a row?

>wasted dubs

Okay, you did it.

>scream as loud as can
>paralyze self with sharpie in pooper
>theyhear.jpg
>all the paraplegics get out of their wheelchairs and begin crawling to OPs house
>they eat all the raw spaghetti in kitchen while moaning about Vietnam
>some of them nibble on OP
>every single one turns toward you
>very rapidly theu rush forward
>become a single being of only arms for shitposting and deppression
>become OP

Fuck yes I did.

KICK IN THE DOOR WAVIN THE 44, ALL YOU HEARD WAS POPPA DONT HIT ME NO MORE

Uses the power weeaboo furrfag and turns the cats into fuckable furrys

God fucking dammit

...

Can we have some more information? what does the front of your house look like?

Jack off on all the female pictures on the house

HOLY SHIT 2 SETS OF DUBS THEN DOUBLE DUBS. MY SHIT IS ON FIYAAAAHH!!!

Go's to OPs Pc and says all woman suck on tumbler a mob of angry feminists will soon arrive

From left to right, there's a wooden fence gate to the backyard, followed by garage. Front door is right next to that, followed by bedroom window and another gate. Lots of bushes in front.

I'll try the garage

I go in and eat all the cat food cuz I fucking can then the cats kill and eat a random jew

>okay

Uhhhh so you somehow entered the house I guess. Congrats. There's approximately 10 visible photos of females across every room. Not having the time to stop and recover, you cum so much that your jizz turns cloudy and runny. Your dick hurts like hell now, but you got the job done.

I've gotta stop getting these dubs. I can't carry them all.

Surveying the house first paid off. You found a key to the side door of the garage hidden in a plastic bag behind a fencepost after climbing to the other side of the left gate. There's tons of tools, a fridge and a freezer, and oven and some construction materials. There's also an attic entrance. No cars. You hear user jacking off like there's no tomorrow on the other side of the door leading to the laundry room.

Sit in the couch and let my dick rest while this other dude ransacks the living room

burn cross in front yard

Reroll

After so much jacking off, you reward yourself with some rest. It is now nighttime. user made it through the laundry room from the garage and into the kitchen. While rummaging through the garage, he found a Corona in the fridge. Out of a mix of pity and respect, he tosses it to you while searching the living room. There's a 50-inch TV bolted to the wall with bookshelves full of different souvenirs and photos and crystal pieces on each side. Under the TV are a variety of bootleg DVD's. It's nighttime now but my parents are both closing at their respective jobs. You and user have 2 turns until they come come.

Hit user in the back of the head with the bear and kill him, leave body there, go home and jack off.

Shit beer*

Reroll

Reroll

While looking for a way to get the TV off the wall rack, you get user by surprise. He was just about to turn around to ask you to get some tools, so the blow wasn't clean. user is now unconscious, but you leave anyways.

1 turn until user gets busted

Come back to jack off on user unconscious body, get busted by parents, continue jacking off

Reroll

Reroll!

Rerollino

Reroller coaster

Roll dammit

/thread

Grabs the anons and says allahu ahkbar 3 times before jumping out of a window

Reeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee