Why are you poking fun at Sweden. Why can't you just respect our god-tier tolerant ways...

Why are you poking fun at Sweden. Why can't you just respect our god-tier tolerant ways? So what if I like gagging on black cock. It is my life-choice and not something to poke fun at. SWEDEN YES!

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Sweden, SJWeden, North Germany, Swedistan or The Land of Gay Viking Metal Jihadists, is a country that never became famous in the Viking age because of their lack of pillaging other countries. They were mostly stationary pussyfaggots who traded and spread peace and harmony and butt love. They were the Hippie-vikings of the north, and saw it as their call to spread falukorv and surströmming across the world. The swedes are known to be the single because of the Black Plague as they invoked the wrath of Allah with their faggotry. The Swedes are responsible for ruining global culture with ABBA, Basshunter, Caramelldansen, Ace of Base and similar faggotry.

The Swedes are Germans pretending to be humans. They used to be Christians, but the only religion they adhere to today is Cultural Marxism.

Sweden is known for being a matriarchy, ruled by hot girls that peg Swedish "men". They are also known for being total pussies; ever since they got a French king they have never went to war ever again, even during WW2 when they were in the middle of the battle they didn't do shit, except helping the nazis invade Norway. The Swedes compensate with this their lack of action by peacefully colonizing Mallorca and Thailand. Just like with the black plague, they invoked the wrath of Allah and caused the Tsunami after Thailand had been flooded with obnoxious pig-skinned Swedes on child-sex vacations.

Shameless selfbump. XD

Getting drunk and having massive gay orgies for the lulz is a Swedish tradition. A typical Swedish midsummer-festival involves getting into a boat full of men and booze, to honor their ancestors, failing and generally being pussies in England/France for the lulz, and returning with massive amounts of dildos. Bringing back all the hawt girls you can find is a tradition that no longer exist, due to the invasion by the gay albino niggers from France.

Sweden has royalty, even though they don't really do shit. The current royal family consists of the King (or Knig as he calls himself), a dyslectic dumbfuck whose only achievement in life was that he crawled out of the right pussy. The queen, a German nazi that cannot speak Swedish and annually spends 3/5th of the Swedish budget on plastic surgery. And then we have their 3 children, all of them male, practically making them all princes, but two of them—realizing they were transexuals—had a sex change thus making giving Sweden two post op princesses, one that turned out ugly and one that became hot.

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Facts

Sweden is shaped like a penis (just like how Norway looks like sperm and Finland looks like a ballsack).
Denmark is like Sweden's cool older brother, Norway the annoying little sibling, and Finland the retarded cousin.
The Swedish weapon industry is the largest white flag producer in the world.
If you decide to wave the Swedish flag, you are racist.
The Vikings were part Norwegian and part gods.
Sweden is a pussywhipped nation where a man who has not been psychologically castrated by a feminazi will never get laid. (Note: Unsurprisingly, an actual man who does not accept psychological castration will make said feminazis' panties wet and consequently get laid a lot more.)
Sweden is full of Arabs who have escaped the Middle-East. Not only do the Arabs make all food in Sweden, but are breeding like fucking rabbits since all Swedish girls are sandnigger-loving race traitors who want to flush the rest of their Aryan genes down the toilet and let them fucked by small-dicked Arabs.
Swedes hate all other Scandinavians.
Swedish girls are insanely dumb. Unlike normal "women", they don't require the boring flirting step.
S&M is illegal in Sweden and can get you partyv&, because they're no fun.
The Swedish Army currently holds the record for fastest surrendering. In an exercise in March 2005, a whole battalion of Swedes surrendered in 0.36 seconds, leaving the French far behind.
Sweden hates you, unless you're a hot male sex-machine.
All Swedes are homosexuals; have you ever seen their football team? GRÆT LULZ.
Sweden is permanently doing it wrong.
If you're fortunate enough to actually get a Swedish model to marry you, never cheat on her with a whore or a pornstar or she will assault you with a golf club.
The Swedish Wikia has about 10 articles with 1-5 words in each.
American intelligene services laconic analysis of Swedish foreign policy goes like this: Sweden is a little dog which always barks, but never bites.

:O
You are such an asshole.

History
Russia and Sweden
ModernSweden.png

Sverige04.jpg

Swedes lived like nature loving hippie homosexuals untill a nazi German priest immigrated to the country 1000 AD, and introduced the Swedes to the concept of politics. Since then different formal and informal political constellations rised and falled, but they all resulted in fail. During the years 1400-1500 or something like that, Danes annexed the country and forced Swedes to give them oral sex; in exchange they got crappy Criminal Investigation theater serials. After about 100 years the Swedes got tired of this and revolted. The Danish pwned the Swedes and promply executed all Swedish nobility (this event is known to history as the Stockholm Bloodbath). However, they missed the offspring of one certain nobleman. He was the chosen one, a badass named Gustav Vasa. Untill the age of 25 he spent all his time doing Rocky training montages. Then he went on a skiing trek, and just like Forrest Gump, he gained many followers in his revuloutionary mission to avenge his father. Needless to say every enemy of him was utterly annihilated, and he became the tyrant of the newly recreated kingdom of Sweden.

The Maker favoured Gustav Vasa, untill he started naming and numbering his sons after a historical revisionist fairy tale king lineage a six year old could have realised was fake: For instance, according to this fairy tale, there were twelve kings before Gustav Vasa with the name of Charles, no one ever heard off – not counting the fairy tales he got the names from. This made God very angry, and before he rage quitted, he said: "Nigga, no nigga is ever gonna get the king lineage history shit now that that they are numbered wrong, you cracker. I am hereby cursing you Sweden, forever! Forever never comes around!" Saying this was a bit like pissing on urine, because the Swedish failure story of trying different political systems, all as crappy as the other one, just continued. Untill one faithfull morning 1870, the Swedish Prime Minister thought to himself, "Hey, how about stop being a paternalistic asshat?" Success thrived! But then, 60 years later, The Lord looked at his RSS-feeds and saw how well the Swedish economy was doing; "He thought to himself, I need to thoroughly attend to this, but I got more important things to do, like listening to peoples prayers, burn images of the Virgin Mary on toasts, and bless America." So he summoned the monster Leviathan, which culminated in it being slayed in the Ådalen shootings. The spirit of Leviathian, however, lived on in every Swede, and for almost 80 years envy ruled supreme, which lead to constant degeneration.

vi har den här tråden varje jävla vecka

By the year 2009 Swedes stopped being jealous, and the curse was seemingly lifted. But now every Swede became a douchebag, and when someone in Sweden is trying to point out the flaw in another's prideful behaviour Swedes say "You are just being a typically jealous Law of Jante-Swede" (Some say the existence of this law somehow proves a higher amount of envy in Sweden than in any other country.). The Law of Jante goes like this:


“
1: You're not to think you are anything special.
„


“
2: You're not to think you are as good as us.
„


“
3: You're not to think you are smarter than us.
„


“
4: You're not to convince yourself that you are better than us.
„


“
5: You're not to think you know more than us.
„


“
6: You're not to think you are more important than us.
„


“
7: You're not to think you are good at anything.
„


“
8: You're not to laugh at us.
„


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9: You're not to think anyone cares about you.
„


“
10: You're not to think you can teach us anything.
„

Saying this is extremly retarded since the Law of Jante was written down in a Danish book describing Danish rural mentality. Besides, being cautious and humble are virtues you freaking uneducated, unhinged, and unbearable DIPSHIT. Dickheadedness is the new sin of Sweden, and this sin is so vile that neither Heaven nor Hell can embody the concept. Here is an example of Swedes being dickheads: Instead of hanging out with friends offline, they put in a lot of effort to brag to their friends on Facebook in order to give the illusion that they are living a perfect life.

Sometime in 2015, Anton Lundin Pettersson went postal with a sword, Star Wars-style and killed a few sandniggers. This was the first time a student has been murdered since the 1960s. Sweden went into an autistic frenzy of butthurt, providing the world with much-needed lulz.

I like giving oral. The rest of what you just said is just bläbläblä. :)

Everyone is equal here. How come that is so wrong? :)

I just don't get how being born here makes you any better, than everyone else in the world.

It has become a tradition.
I will visit your country, ill walk down the golden staircase set on Mount norway and slowly make my way down crossing Svinesund bridge and rowing a rented boat across the sewage that is sweden.
Black Dicks has become the only food source for swedish citizens.
"a cumshot a day keeps starvation away"

Hah, seems the Sup Forums assholes ran out of steam. XD

It's my main source of protein these days.

The military is great tough

>"a cumshot a day keeps intolerance away"
Fixed it for you.

>There are 6 posters in this thread.
Holy shit you norwegian/danish faggot, chill the fuck out. You'll just have to accept that we're superior to you in every single way.

I dont get it.

Us Swedes are superior when it comes to tolerance. Sup Forums needs to stop hating on us. :)

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You seem to like gay stuff, fitting since you're norwegian.

youtube.com/watch?v=Nrnq4SZ0luc

Butthurt garderobhomosex spotted XD

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You like?

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yea thanks

Heres my fav.

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