I need REVENGE on my annoying neighbor, and I'd like some ideas, Sup Forums

I need REVENGE on my annoying neighbor, and I'd like some ideas, Sup Forums

>be me
>move in new rental house
>meet neighbor
>seems like an okay guy
>summer comes
>have no lawnmower
>after lawn gets pretty overgrown, neighbor mows it for me one day
>go to thank neighbor
>no problem he says, after all your yard is tiny and it only took me a minute
>finally i get lawnmower, little push mower
>mowing my own lawn now takes just a few minutes (it's really very tiny)
>mowing lawn every other week unless the grass grows too quickly
>neighbor mows his every weekend
>one weekend he mows mine again
>go to thank him again
>don't know if you noticed neighbor, but i have a mower now, so don't need you to mow anymore
>don't want to put you out
>it was no trouble he says
>still, i say, i'd feel better if i took care of it myself
>time passes
>he mows again, trims too
>destroys my wife's flower that was planted next to house
>go see neighbor
>thanks for getting the lawn again, neighbor, but when you did you used your weedeater on my wife's flowers
>oh sorry he says
>well it's alright, i say, just let me take care of my lawn so stuff like this won't happen
>he promises to do so
>fast forward to current day
>neighbor mowed my lawn while wife and i were away for the day
>he destroyed my wife's flower again

so, i'll be talking to him tomorrow, Sup Forums, but i also would like to take some petty revenge on him
it's clear at this point he's doing this out of spite or because he thinks i should mow more often, but honestly i've told the guy multiple times not to and he continues

what are some ways i could fuck with the guy who i'm stuck living next to for the foreseeable future without doing anything (too) illegal? i'd like your suggestions

also, what are some instances where you got revenge on someone? please share stories of revenge, Sup Forums

Other urls found in this thread:

collectorsfirearms.com/john-manton-percussion-dueling-pistols-ah3353/
darkknightarmoury.com/p-21627-18th-century-gentlemans-small-sword.aspx
twitter.com/SFWRedditImages

Put sugar in his lawnmower. That way he can't mow shit

just hammer spikes into the lawn so he destroys his lawnmower.

as an added bonus there's a chance of injuring him.

plant a flower then hide metal wire around it.

i have honestly considered this, but his mower stays padlocked in his garage whenever he's not using it

sprinkle bullets all over your lawn

put a mattress in his swimming pool. It usually takes a crane to get it out.

Bolt fucking cutters
Cut the padlock off and you're set.

i should probably do this
while i'm in there i can check to see if he's the person that stole my extension cord that went missing a few weeks ago

>Checked

yeah just throw some big rocks and shit in your yard when it gets just tall enough to hide them he will fuck his shit up and never do it again

This is a potential felony do not attempt

possibly instead of sugar in tank and getting in legal trouble, you could just put your own padlock, with the promise to let his mower go only if he says he'll stop mowing ur yard

felony, you say?

hmm, i do want to avoid felonies

hey so I cant see anybody else mentioning this

has OP considered putting up a fucking fence?

Who the cares dumb fuck off to reddit piece of shit

>mix some fertilizer in a water bottle
>poke a hole in the cap
>spray obscenities in his yard
>wait
>grass will grow taller/darker where you sprayed it

I would strategically place objects all over your lawn and near the bed he's wrecking. Hopefully he'll damage his mower and injure himself.

Since he's technically trespassing, it's on him.

OP youre a big fat faggot.
Now that the requisite formalities have been addressed, I run a termite breeding business which ships to the lower 48, no shipping charges incured for orders over 2,000 specimens(queen included!)

this, but with highly concentrated salt water. permanent lawn dick.

small rocks can do the job, and they are easy to hide on grass

Kill him

Put lots of (ideally pretty) rocks around your yard so his mower can't do shit on your yard. Only take them out when you mow. The flower should go in a pot next to your door.

caltrops should do it

If OP does something now while already accusing the neighbor of destroying his flowers, it would be pretty easy for the police to put two and two together and find out it was OP who sabotaged the neighbor's lawmower.

Ah yes, do so in the shape of a cock and balls

I got one
>Start cutting your grass every weekend
>Show your neighbor that you can be a conformist
>Stop being a whinny ungrateful bitch and grow up

This. If he fucks with it then complain to the county and/or report vandalism. Or get a gun and yell at him. Git ay propa stompin in!

does he use a push or ride mower?

...

Put a small garden fence around her flowers and continue to have him mow your lawn dude.

>Who the cares dumb fuck off to
wew lad

burn his house down

OP here

i didn't know my neighbor browsed Sup Forums too

ride

Get a pack of niggers to rape him

Personally if my neighbor did that I would punch the shit they call their face in. Then once he cant breath on his own blood in his throat I would quit and tell him to steer 15 ft away from my lawn and flower at all times.

>shit in a jug
>do this for a week
>one day dump all your shit on his doorstep
>neighbor comes home to elephant sized dump
>will have no idea how it got there
>mfw
>yfw
>tfw

If he has a dog that goes outside, throw cheese in the yard. It'll give the dog the shits.

Conformists let people mow their wife's gardens? How much of a bitch are you?

...

Dubs confirms that op is in fact, a bitch

Be subtle at first, build a vast conspiracy within his mind. then be terrifying.

don't think he was referring to OP

Do this OP

would not work. "neighbor" is already fucking with op's mind

Maybe you should cut your fucking grass more often you lazy fuckhole.

Post updates on Sup Forums every day

Yes you cuck and trust me when I say that your pretty wife doesn't care about those shitty flowers whenever I am plowing her and planting my seed past her bushes.

yea man throw some spike and shit by the flowers. those tires aint so cheap

don't plant flowers and let him mow ur fuckin lawn

1. wait untill he's on your property
2. shoot him
3. claim it was selfdefence
4.get away with it (if you live in the usa)

I had the same problem, op
After a week I decided to drug his wife, shoot him, and frame the wife
He hasnt fucked with my lawn since!

make friends with a police officer and when he's over at your house, make sure it's one of the days your neighbor mows your lawn

oh hey what are you doing on my property. what can i do here officer friendo? this is about as vengeful a normal, mature adult would go about things

One more idea: stalk him with pineapples.

Thats a barbaric way to handle such a petty situation.
It by no means makes you tough, user.

Tell the police he tried to run you over with the lawnmower

>this is about as vengeful a normal, mature adult

this may be true
but i am no normal, mature adult

True, OP is a beta faget for experiencing this challenge from territorial male.

Yard hazards to fuck-up his lawnmower. Plenty of good ones already suggested.

>Stick metal spikes in the ground
>Caltrops
>Rocks

Any of these will fuck the blades up if they're tough enough. He won't mow your lawn if he has to drop some cash to get them fixed every time.

I've seen that greentext
You got it?

by the law of sweet tea, the higher the water temp the more you can disolve.
Heat some water on the stove, stir n salt til it doesn't disolve.
Profit

Use potassium perchlorate and aluminum powder mix and put in yard in something.

>runs over container
>fucking explodes
>no more lawn mower
>no more neighbor

I don't recommend this at all

Nice trips. But seriously just tell him to fucking quit or start leaving big ass rocks in your yard, at least the size of a soft ball so if he runs it over it won't fling it, it will just fuck up his blades.

Its sad and frustrating that I cant tell whether the responses to obvious bait are bait or not

>move in new rental house
And you expect us to believe your neighbor is the problem?

Too much time and effort for something that small. Same reason you don't put a fence around your penis.

Spray him with water every time he goes to your lawn

collectorsfirearms.com/john-manton-percussion-dueling-pistols-ah3353/
darkknightarmoury.com/p-21627-18th-century-gentlemans-small-sword.aspx
Your pick
settle it the old fashioned way

Try getting fungus or flowers with poisonous spores, so whenever he inhales them when mowning.The aspergillus fumigatus might interest you.

If you don't want to go that far you might wanna try with dog shit instead.

...

>Start mowing his lawn
>Do a shitty job
>Kill his flowers
>???
>Profit

OP here

so many good suggestions that helped me brainstorm and come up with a good plan

rape neighbor's wife
kill his children
then, put sugar in his lawn mower's gas tank

I like where these guys are going

N hero

You sound like a cuck, do you let people fuck your wife too?

Strategically place rocks or trees in a grid so that his mower won't fit in your yard

juat tell to stop fucking mowing your lawn

say FUCKING and LAWN really loud

stop FUCKING mowing my LAWN

that could work

Put a sign in your lawn saying 'stay the fuck out of my lawn' and put a cctv, if he still enters, give the video to police.

plant metal shit around the yard incase he tries to meow again
another idea is throw dishsoap or something in his cars gas tank
or if you don't want to confront him or if you just want some free downloads hack his wifi or just jam it at like 6pm every night or whenever he uses it most

well not only that, but it's one of the only things that will strike fear into a person who'd do something like taking time out of his day to act on passive aggressive urges garnered by a few simple interactions. he wants to punish you, but he can't if that happens

maybe put a bunch of pennies in your yard in places you know where they are so you can pick them up when you mow, but if he does it there's a chance he could get really hurt.

wait till he comes over with his mower

walk out over too him

yank one of his arms away from the mower, look him in the eyes and say: stop mowing my lawn.

send pizza to front door

Get a pitbul

That's got potential give out address and phone number for nearby pizza places that deliver.

Tell him you'll kill him if he mows your lawn again, if he does kill him.
Perfectly legal.

No it doesn't you retard.

no nearby pizza places that deliver out here

i live in rural hell

Spray potent poisons on his grass and trees

seems legit

Fuck that felony noise. Get an identical padlock and bolt cutters. Cut his off and replace it with your new one. He will lose his
Mind trying to figure out wtf is going on.

What delivers out there?

make pizza and put on front door

the post office, UPS, and Fed Ex

that's pretty much it, user

shit in his letter box

i like this idea too

Kill yourself

Just mow his yard too and rek his flowers

May as well steal the lawnmower

Use old package in marked fill with dildos old piss bottles and shit. Close up and leave in front of door. Super glue bottom of box to ground so it's a big pain in the ass