It's almost 2AM, I'm wired as shit

It's almost 2AM, I'm wired as shit.

Ask a DHL Express ramp agent anything.

what the fuck is a ramp agent

Haha, if to are the for then what will are they not do could?

Why did you guys do so shitty in Canada?

A ramp agent marshals in planes, offloads the freight, reloads it after its sorted, and then sends the planes back out.

has anyone really so far ect. ect.

Fuck if I know. I don't touch any Canuckistan flights.

Why does every single Amazon seller use you guys and why do you take so fucking long to deliver holy shit

International shipping yo. Customs likes to take apart your waifu pillows and dragon dildos to make sure drugs and shit don't get smuggled.

You think I'm kidding, but I'm not.

As for Amazon...probably because DHL is the biggest/primary international shipper in the world.

What's the most expensive thing you've broken?

At work? Probably a can. Those things are kinda fragile if you put enough force behind a punch or a piece of freight.

At home? A tv.

fucks a can?

One of these fuckers. They come in different sizes too.

ohhhh, you mean ULD's. Well, that's what we called them. I only worked as a freight forwarder though, didn't get to load the fuckers onto planes.

They can be FUN. Especially when forklift drivers don't understand physics and place all the heavy shit in the back.

Have you ever transported something illegal for money

What do you get paid? How are the hours?

>implying I don't know you're working with the CBP

you'll never catch me alive!

But no, I have not.

The hub I work at is third shift (AKA graveyard shift, AKA midnight to 7AM). I think newer ramp employees start out more than what I made starting out. Probably in the $12/hour range. Been there for over 2 years, so I'm sitting at like $13.35/hour or whatever.

Can somebody check my trips

Not bad. Have some tits

if someone rolls quads will you hide inside a can and fly on the plane?

>serious time
where do you handle flights to?

Considering the flights I DO work, quads wouldn't be enough to risk my job.

But I work a Guadalajara, Mexico and a Nashville, TN flight M-Thur, and I do a Hamilton, 2 Miami, Milwaukee, and a Denver flight on Sundays. Should note that M-Thur, I'm offloading whatever assignments we're given till our upload time starts.

How much would it cost to ship myself in a manner in which you wouldn't notice, but also without dying or being injured?

Per mile, maybe.

That's for Expedia, Travelosity or whatever plane ticket service to decide. If you were an employee and this was pre-9/11, you were actually allowed to jumpseat (ride on) a plane with the pilots if that was your destination, IIRC.

Quints?
to put somone else in
maybe
and does that mean you can just go for a quick holiday to mexico no flight costs?

>I Don't Want to Get Fired: The Post

Oh, okay buddy. "No live cargo. That's the rule." I gotcha.

Pretty much. But as I said, after 9/11, they stopped that shit pronto.

Actually, we DO ship live cargo. Animals on occasion. Funny story though...

>guy is loading bulk compartment
>winds up falling asleep waiting for freight
>it doesn't arrive, crew closes up plane, goes to send it out
>plane has to turn around and come back in after pilots heard pounding and screaming from within

Fucking people man. Guy better be glad the plane didn't take off.

How much to ship a 200lb, uh, dog? He's shy, though, so you can't look at him, and you have to just leave him on the street when you get there. His new owner is, uh, nervous.

Imagine if the still did tho
>DHL is now fully stalled by mexicans
>new catchphrase
>Trump may have build a wall, but DHL will >fly you over it

Probably a few hundred. And hope he enjoys being in a small, cramped space. gotta use up all that container space, yo.

Our slogan is 'Ain't no mountain high enough' or something like that. Like that damn oldies song. But fucking kek.

Whats the most valuable thing you've come across?

...

how are counterfit items destroyed? i tried ordering some fake shit and got them seized and "destroyed"

Probably the big fucking Boeing 747s that we have. Holy shit, those things are XBOX HUEG.

Customs takes them and breaks them apart, shreds them, ect. My roommate had to actually help them from time to time since he deals with clearing shipments through Customs.

>aint no mountain high enough
>implying we dont know that DHL does aeroplanes
Always wanted to work at HK my \self , not in the industry but still, looks fun
>next question
Does DHL sponcer Surf lifesavers everywhere? (They do here)

Potential Aussiefag detected. I don't think so, at least not in the US. Hell, I don't even know WHAT DHL sponsers except for their own rally car driver. By a quick Google search, doesn't look like there's an organization like that around here (Cincinnati/Northern Kentucky area).

Weirdest shit you've came across?

A manatee.

A fucking manatee. Came in a large, wooden box and was probably knocked the fuck out.

>Aussiefag
NZFag - dont even know what the proper term is

thread has dide
rip

Why does it take so fucking long to get my parcel faggot

this