Terrible joke thread?

Terrible joke thread?

>What does a baby look like in the blender?
>I dont know, I close my eyes when I masturbate

Other urls found in this thread:

dailymotion.com/video/x2ytomc
twitter.com/SFWRedditGifs

...

...

no im not

...

oh god you got me

>whats red and bad for your teeth?
>a brick

I get it. It's funny because it's not true at all.

ayyyy my sides

thats exactly what a skeleton would say

That ain't funny Bobby

What did the bartender say to the horse?

Why the long face?

wut wuld u call the flinstones if they were black/
Nigger

>What's worse than ten dead babies nailed to a tree?
>One dead baby nailed to ten trees

Why can't black kids play in the sand box?

They will be buried by cats.

>How do you pick up a Jewish girl?

>You bring a dustpan to Auschwitz.

wuts the diff between a nigger and a pizza?
a pizza will feed a family of 4

And the horse responded "My alcoholism is destroying my life"

Oh jew!

how do you make a plumber cry?
you kill his family

how do you make a clown frown?
throw an axe at his face

whats the best part about fucking a 6 year old?
watching them cry in the witness stand

why was the little boy crying?
i ran over his legs

why did he stop?
reversed onto his head

why do I smash homeless women?
you can drop em off anywhere

What's the difference between a faggot and you? Trick question, there isn't one

A doctor and his patient go out for dinner, she was actually his wife and not his patient at all

What's blue and smells like red paint?
Blue paint

>nogalert

>What did Cinderella say when she got to the ball?

>*garbling noise*

hoho

two muffins are in an oven
one muffin turns to the other and says "I lost my job and the bills are piling up"
the other muffin says oh wow a talking muffin

I went to a football game with OP, and he had a massive purple dildo with a bat handle on the end. I asked, "why did you bring this? You look like a rediculous faggot." He replied, " you said the Lions were playing the Bears!"

>What's worse than 10 babies in a trashcan?
>10 trashcans in a baby

Nah OP just played too much saints row

A priest and a rabbi are walking down the street, and they see a little 8-year-old boy. The priest says to the rabbi, "Let's fuck him!" The rabbi responds, " Out of what?"

I was driving my car and I saw a sign that read, Next Rest Stop, 23 miles" and I though to myself, "Wow, that's pretty big."

At Least anymore.

Replace the blood with oil and the landscape the family is looking at with Detroit.

>What’s Webster’s definition of confusion?
>Father’s day in Harlem.

What do you call a girl with no legs?

DISABLED.

Hedgehogs. Why can’t they just share the hedge?

Heh

What does a retarded pirate say?

W.

A priest and a rabbi are walking together down a street talking religion. suddenly, the pass a school with children out on the playground.
The priest looks at the rabbi and says "hey, lets go fuck all those kids!"
The rabbi replies "Out of what?"

A black man and a white man go to a bar together.
The white man says to the black man "how would you like a handjob?"
Then suddenly the black man KO's the white man in one single punch to the fuckin' face!
The bar tender says to the black man "You completely knocked out that guy! I mean jeez, what did he say?"
Then the black man replies "I dunno, somethen about a job"

"Excuse me," I said to the woman sat in front of me on the bus, "You have some semen on the back of your jacket."

"I'm sure it's not semen," she said, "It's probably yoghurt."

"It's definitely semen," I said, "I don't ejaculate yoghurt."

Sometimes I wonder what my grandfather would think of what I do. He spent his whole life in the kebab business and was buried with all his equipment -- probably turning in his grave.

Mah nigga

What did the Jewish pedophile say to the little boy after he lured him into his car?

"Hey, go easy on those sweets!"

I got arrested for playing chess in the street. I said, it's because I'm black, isn't it.

Shut up seinfeld

What does a jew pervert say?
Wanna buy some candy lil girl?

kek

As a child I watched Mary Poppins so many times I suffered from a condition with my sight. Umdiddleiddleiddleumdiddle Eye.

I fapped in a sock so many times my dick grew a toenail

i saw a nigger walking down the street with a tv, and i said to myself, hey, that looks like mine! but mine is at home, shining my shoes.

dailymotion.com/video/x2ytomc
The only amusing thing Pete Holmes has done. Rather, gotten Joe DeRosa to do with a puppet.

why does it suck to be a black jew?

you have to sit at the back of the oven.

Samefag

>what's brown and sticky
>stick

Kek

What's the white mans whip?


When the slaves aren't working.

What's brown and sticky?

A stick

What hops on grass?

A grasshopper

Grab your taco, you've pulled a dyslexic Mexican.

This guy said to me: ‘I’m going to attack you with the neck of a guitar.’ I said: ‘Is that a fret?’

What do you get when you cross a joke and a rhetorical question?

OP here. Why dont we go for some racist jokes?

>A black man and a white man both jump from a tree. Who hits the ground first?
>Whitey, nignog was stopped by the rope

a dank maymay?

Too easy.
What do a Mexican and a billiard ball have in common? The harder you hit it, the more English you get.

No.... the horse didn't say anything, because it's a horse

What's more than 5 inches long and white? Nothing.
What do you call an all-white basketball team? The bench.
What's the most popular white wine? "I want to move to Portland."
What do you call a white man engulfed in flames? A firecracker.

Know why they call my tongue a spaceship?
>b/c tonight it's gonna be flying in circles arond Uranus

What do you call a black man crossed with an octopus?
No fucking idea, but it sure can pick cotton.