/hoc/ - Fuck you fucking faggot edition

CAL:Glen Gulutzan is the Flames' new head coach
VAN:Sven Baertschi signs two-year extension
LA:Kings name Anze Kopitar as team captain
PHI:Flyers will buyout R.J. Umberger's contract
CAR:Carolina signs Cam Ward to 2-year/$6.6M deal
WAS:Karl Alzner undergoes successful surgery
CAR:Hurricanes acquire Teravainen, Bickell
NYI:Kyle Okposo likely heading for free agency
LA:Kings, Lucic in 'ongoing' contract talks
ARI:Coyotes open to extension for Martin Hanzal
CLG:Report: NHL chooses Las Vegas for expansion
ANA:Ducks bring back Randy Carlyle as head coach

Other urls found in this thread:

youtu.be/IdDfF4hXfj4
nhl.com/news/nhl-draft-auston-matthews-vs-patrik-laine/c-280970416?tid=277764372
twitter.com/NSFWRedditImage

well what about if you're the penguins or lightning and you have 2 goalers you don't want to lose? just slap a NMC clause on the young guys contracts and problem solved fuck you buttman no goalies for vegas

>Calgary coach

Literally who?

used to coach the stors and NHL teams are too scared to hire anyone that hasn't been a head coach before

Finns are ugly and very stupid. They also smell bad.

agreed finns are bad people

again

you can

you just have 2 players that cant be moved no matter what and you're stuck with their contracts.

its a very short-sighted solution

look at people like Ericsson (red wings) and Parise (Minnesota). Wings are stuck with ericsson at 4.5 million a year until like 2020, and he's garbage. It's hard to move him because he has a MNTC

Parise is just not worth 7.5 mill and minnesota has him until 2024, and they're stuck with him

NTC is a benefit for the player, not the GM

No u
But Americans are fat. This is what we can agree on.

But fleury and I think bishop already have them and they're concerned with keeping their younger goalies so might as well put a nmc on their small contracts that they already have now

They're already stuck with the older guys might as well make sure you don't have to lose the younger one

I dont think you can just add things to contracts, but I could be wrong

you're thinking too rigidly though. Players are assets in that they can be traded for other players. They're versatile that way. Versatility is very valuable

when you lock a player to your team, you're making a commitment.

plus, I think there are restrictions on NTC, like minimum salary and duration

>mfw the Kings win the Stanley Cup

It's an odd year, so the Hawks win this time.

...

>yfw Zetterberg lifts the cup and hands it to Cleary

That meme is over. Now we are switching it up.

>it's a "gypsy fuck ruins another /hoc/ thread" episode
Finns are no longer bad posters its romania that is evil

If the Stanley Cup was Wongs-Hawks, that'd be good enough for me.

>we
Didn't know you played on the Kings, which Kardashian are you Armenia?

/hoc/ power rankings

>Holy Trinity
Sweden
Canada
America

>Norge :3
Norway

>Lesser Beings
Finland
Russia
Czech
Germany

>Animals and Garbage
Greece
Armenia
UK

Bump Finland down a tier and also add the slovak cuck to animals and garbage. Otherwise spot on

finland should be in its own tier

mannerheim was a manlet bitch retard and simo hayha was a literal cuckold

>Swedecucks
Lundshit
>Canacucks
1993
>Amerifats
1980

Nice list you got there, fagt.

Now can we just keep offseason /hoc/ comfy? Or do you want to shit post all summer?

every country has something to offset the shitty parts it has

except for you.

Except I don't pretend my country is perfect.

>lying on the Internet

JAZZ HANDS

>samefagging amerikaano

>1993
A fucking leaf

Here lemme fix that for you

/hoc/ power rankings

>Holy Trinity
Finland
Canada
America

>Norge :3
Norway

>Lesser Beings
Sweden
Russia
Czech
Slovakia
Germany

>Animals and Garbage
Greece
Armenia
UK

the placement of finland and sweden can be debated, but the rest is fine

BLOWN THE FUCK OUT

>a Turkish rape baby is talking in my direction

You're forgetting this one
>yfw the ooga booga nigger has a stable family with a wife and two kids and a pupper

>samefagging mongol fuck
nope, you're not getting my (You)s pekka

>pupper
I see you're hip to the newest and dankest Reddit memes. Upvoted!

Rate my pupper

you can have mine though

Is that a black lab?
Looks like a great pup, would pet/10

Purebred black lab he's a jumping dog

Nice

>I had a dream the >rags traded Zucc for some old pile of shit

who are you quoting?

sleep tite puppa

...

>Shorks

Feel bad for Joe desu. So close

I don't, he's a fucking crybaby cheapshotting faggot

>Cucknadia

>feeling bad for someone when they don't even show up in the finals

TYLER PITLICK (SIGNED) 2 WAY 1 YEAR $725,000 CONTRACT NHL/AHL PENDING LEAGUE REVIEW

>Pitlick
>amerinames

>Shane Cuckovich

Good post

>things this slow in the offseason

Why not make it a Vegas thread?

and talk about what? the same things about vegas we'e been talking about?

lets talk about sandwiches

That's kinda why I feel bad

I have had three open faced sandwiches during the day today. One with a cheese called HerrgÄrd, that I think we only get in Sweden. One with fish roe paste and one with mustard and ham. Butter on all of them of course.

Am I doing it right?

lmao. about time honkies get a taste of their own medicine desu

Oh, all of them were made on rye sour dough

oh no what do we do now reddit?

did you buy from publix?

I made them myself. I am my own Publix

the ingredients i mean. publix carries only the freshest meat and vegetables, unlike most grocery stores who have rotten food thats 3 days old

2017 is our year

1. Publix doesn't have HerrgÄrds-cheese
2. Publix doesn't have fish roe paste
3. Publix doesn't have Nordic quality rye bread
4. Publix doesn't have swedish butter (italians use swedish cows to make parmesan cheese as a matter of fact)
5. Got the ham from a local farmer, Publix doesn't carry the brand
6. Publix doesn't seem to carry the mustard that is perfect for sandwiches

You've never been to publix sven

>t. flyoverfag
stay mad cuck

Publix have never been to Sweden either Tyler

>mad at me for pointing out flaws with Publix
lel

You have the old version before I fixed lex's name

>even somalis are getting mad at publix now
How mad does this picture make you?

...

>pens poo all over tampa's loo
>all tampa fans leave /hoc/
>playoffs are over
>tampa fans come crawling back

youtu.be/IdDfF4hXfj4
American bread everybody

@@68594472

Underrated posts tbfwyf

>imfuckingplying

sub""""""""human""""""""" yurotrash getting mad at sandwiches again? Sad!

NHL.com recently asked 13 NHL scouts for their choice if given the option; Matthews earned an 11-2 edge.
nhl.com/news/nhl-draft-auston-matthews-vs-patrik-laine/c-280970416?tid=277764372

>binland BTFO

>I-I-I'm not a t-t-tampa f-fan I s-s-s-swear
Pathetic

Post Finnish meme

Yli pros encouraged

...

You're not taking my yous you somali cuck

You are now aware that Sweden's best defenseman is literally somalian

I literally never left

official /hoc/ calendar

>5 days until the NHL Awards show [June 22nd]
>7 days until the NHL draft day 1 [June 24th]
>11 days until the CHL import draft [June 28th]
>14 days until NHL free agency period [July 1st]
>~49 days until Ivan Hlinka Memorial Tournament begins [starts anywhere from August 5th - 12th]
>59 days until Jimmy Vesey sweepstakes [August 15th]
>92 days until World Cup of Hockey begins [September 17th]
>117 days until NHL regular season begins [October 12th]

Checked

Now gander at these

...

>87 posts
>still ZERO lgbtning fans
Looks like we ran them off the board. Or maybe Omar killed them lelmao

...

I think we should post slags instead of Sup Forums posting

>slags

Yes yes, good job Pittsburgh, good job Pittsburgh..

HOWEVER

It doesn't work in this situation...

Eric

>Animals and garbage
>UK
But we're basically non existent in /hoc/ ;_;

Shoo shoo slimey limey

Witnessed

September 12th, 2006: The Flyers offered Ryan Kesler one-year at $1.9 million. The Canucks matched.

July 6th, 2007: The Oilers offered Thomas Vanek $49 million over seven years. Buffalo matched.

July 26th, 2007: Oilers offered Penner $21.5 million over five years. Ducks took the picks.

July 1st, 2008: Vancouver offered David Backes three years at $2.5 mill/year. St.Louis matched.

July 8th, 2008: The Blues offered Steve Bernier one year at $2.5 million. The Canucks matched.

July 9th, 2010: San Jose offers Niklas Hjalmarsson $14 million over four years. Chicago matches.

July 18th, 2012: Philly offered Shea Weber 14 years at $110 million. Nashville matched.

February 28th, 2013: Calgary offers Ryan O'Reilly two years at $10 million. Colorado matched.

Offer sheets are rare today, because often you will have to give the player a substantial raise, and then relinguish multiple draft picks to acquire him. Many teams are leery of offer sheets, but with so many teams up against the salary cap, this might be the year we see one or two.

There are many talented young forwards who've yet to re-sign with their team like Johnny Gaudreau, Sean Monahan, Filip Forsberg, Nathan MacKinnon, Mark Schiefele, Mike Hoffman, Alex Killorn and Vincent Trocheck. None of these teams are in a bad cap situation, so I doubt they get an offer sheet, plus young, skilled forwards aren't nearly as sought after as young, capable defencemen.

I'd be surprised if there was an offer sheet, but if I had to guess I'd wager a defender would be the target. Hampus Lindholm, Seth Jones, Tyson Barrie, Jacob Trouba, Rasmus Ristolainen and Tory Krug are available.

Lindholm would be my first choice, followed by Jones.

The Blue Jackets have less than $4 million in cap space and they need to sign Jones and two other players. An offer sheet would put them in a very tough situation.

Live in Kentucky. Could be a Preds fan but they're just fucking boring. How are the Red Wings?

Who should I root for if I like exciting games and kind of enjoy when fights break out? I don't care if they win a lot. I plan to stick with a team and not bandwagon. But I don't want to try to get behind a team that bores me.