This just happened. I should just kill myself right?
>be me >be sicko who collects his cum >Keep jar under my bed >Also keeps lots of things under my bed for space reasons >mom texts me while I'm out and told me she's home early from work >she says she needs to clean my room because we have guests sleeping over this weekend >I sleep in the spare bedroom when we have guests >PANIC >Come home as fast as possible >check under bed >not there >killme.jpg >walk in the the kitchen to find it on the counter among other things from around the house >"hey user I found this under your bed. I just put it out here so I could get around all the trash and vacuum. What is it" >sweating profusely >"shampoo. I just keep it in case we run out" >"well why didn't you tell me we needed shampoo user. Don't hoard stuff in the house" >Walk out of room and around corner. My heart rate is insane. >See her pouring the jar into almost empty shampoo container that everybody uses >LOL but still FUCK >dad comes home >takes a shower
I'm currently locked in my room and they're talking outside. I can't understand what they're saying, but I think I'm fucked.
FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK WHY DO I DO THIS FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK
Brody Lee
WHY DIDNT YOU STOP HER
Ayden Hall
I WAS TOO BUSY SHITTING MY PANTS GIMME BREAK
I should just an hero right? I mean there's no reason to go on at this point.
Julian Cox
Dude, talk about being fucked in multiple ways.
Jack Foster
Post pics pls
Christopher Bailey
pic with cum jar and timestamp
Ryder Turner
as a person who has actually saved his semen I can tell that this is complete bullshit
Christian Cox
youre fucked but this meemee should sooth the pain
Adrian Lopez
...
Jason Perez
checked OP must oblige or gtfo
Benjamin Gray
>tell your dad the truth >let us know how it went
Dylan Morris
Couldn't find my phone. My hand are shaking still.
Jack Perez
OP here. I mean it's empty that's best I got. FUCKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK
Gabriel Taylor
I want close ups of that jar boyo
Adrian Phillips
Pffthahahahahahahahahahahahaa.
God damnit. Wait.
Your dad washed his hair with your spooge. With cumpoo. Shamjizz.
Hehhehahhaaahhhhehhehe
Nigga you're fucked
Brayden Reyes
...
Elijah Foster
op is died
Connor James
...
Noah Reed
PUT ME IN THE REDDIT THEAD LADS
Jonathan Nguyen
Me too
Isaac Gutierrez
>cumpoo >shamjizz
Jack Turner
I wish this were true but your mom knows what cum looks and smells like there is no way she wouldn't know.
Jace Perry
I want to die
Juan Gutierrez
...
Evan Butler
...
Luis Perez
That looks like mayo or microwaved white cheese.
Jaxson Clark
is op kill?
Benjamin Stewart
It probably doesn't taste like it.
Aiden Gomez
Utterly disguisting.
Charles Watson
bump
Tyler Reed
FUCKING THINKING ABOUT IT
Andrew Moore
It hardens up and you wouldn't be able have those finger marks like in the pic, that looks like icing. Kill yourself
Levi Collins
The problem is you're a retard. If you want to keep cum under your bed, you should tell your parents you need more privacy. Not lie like a retard. if your mom goes through your things like that, then she is an idiot. You never go through somebody's things because you might find shit like this.
You will be fucked when you grow up because you're a moron.
/thread
Leo Cox
I eat it too :,(
I did my best to get as much as I can since I lost it all.
Daniel Reed
Holy fucking Christ OP, you could've said it was lotion, acne cream, or really anything dermatological. You could've even said it was food you forgot about months ago, since your room is so messy.
This guys the real expert
Ian Taylor
I have to agree with this user op is a bullshitter cum doesn't work like that picture
Jaxon Jackson
>I sleep in spare bedroom when we have guests
If you're going to make up a story at least have it be believable
Aaron Collins
...
Dominic Ross
...
Jackson Sullivan
Nice dubs.
>be me >be sicko
But a great story to tell the rest of the cell block someday!
Ian Jones
nice trips
Carter Ortiz
>this whole thread
Dylan Barnes
You just smeared butter in a cup you lying nigger
Andrew Price
I knew this thread was b8 right after I saw the picture. True jizz gets to be a yellowy orange color after a while as well.
Jose Campbell
true..... op is fag
Jack Barnes
Don't believe him hes just trying to keep his shit thread alive by saying wild things.
Matthew Ross
Hey /r/Sup Forums
Jonathan Collins
OP is a faggot.
Thread over move along nothing to see here
Kayden Davis
I knew it was bait because its not even a jar it's a container
Jason Martinez
B.b.b.ut mah trips must demand something, surely? A glass full of lemon custard, maebe?