Things you wish you knew the first time you fucked a girl

Things you wish you knew the first time you fucked a girl

How to put her diaper back on

That I'd wake up right before climax

/thread

How to check for rape whistles

That she'd want to watch Sesame Street through it.

DNA would be a thing

How much causes the ghb overdose

If she's your first real gf, you'll think she's special and all that. Maybe even that you'll be together forever.

Trust me, the sex is probably not as good as you think it is because she's your first. And she will almost definitely crave more/other cocks. Don't fall into the illusion that you'll be the last one to sexually satisfy her, just enjoy it while it lasts.

98% of women are cheap sluts, use protection if she's not your gf!

The G spot is basically under her bellybutton.
Rub the clit as much as you can.

my husbands get out of work early days

Its a coworker. Decided to grow some balls and try to change my life a bit.
19 year old virgin is bad but not TOO bad. I still have hope I won't stay a faggot

Doesn't being an OP contradict your dreams of not being a faggot?

Lube would of been helpful!

I was a virgin and she was a virgin.
I only had non lubed condoms.
She was Japanese and very tiny.
Fucking her doggy style was the only way i managed to get mah dick in.
She ended up bleeding all over my bedding as I ripped that pussy apart.

My first was a squirter.

I had no idea what the hell was happening, and it kind of freaked me out.

even i can guess how that night really went

>made girl squirt her first time
>didn't know what squirting was
Yah okay fgt

that rape is bad

That they'd try to emotionally manipulate you for weeks after in exchange for sex.

>stuck dick in girl
>Instantly began farting and cumming uncontrollably
>Make up lie about first time to make myself feel better

her mom will be a shit shag and itll split you and her up, dont do it its not worth it

I don't fucking understand Kasia. Won't fuck on camera, but will do degrading shit like that?

sounds epic, why make excuses, i want me some of that cumming and farting tang

2cnd'd
/thread

Shit... Fail

bro she could of shit up every wall and you wouldnt really know it wasnt normal the first time, a bit of squirting would seem natural, till you found out it wasn't, liar

in more ways than one bro, more ways than one

That she had a penis.

That all of my semen would leak out of her vagina about 20 min after we fucked all over the seats of my mom's Benz and make the car stink like sex for weeks.

~5 people on Sup Forums actually got laid. This question is pretty much irrelevant.

First time doing anal stuff with the first girl I ever had.

She bought a string of beads and some lube. said she cleaned herself out beforehand. I had no idea what she meant by that at the time but whatever.

>She asks me to push a finger in and feel around
>I go straight into the second knuckle and then start to ease my middle finger in aswell
>She responds very well
>Go for a third, she's loving it.
>Thrusting my fingers in and out and shes moaning like a bitch in heat
>She pulls off and turns on her front, spread eagled
>Tells me to put the ball string in.
>These things are pretty big for a beginner
>Lube up her ass and give her a little massage to boot
>Push each one in, taking my time
>Get them REALLY deep in there, pushing them further with my finger.
>When it gets to the last one all that's left is the ring on the end
>She flips over and holds her legs up in the air
>"ok, now pull them out"
>Not knowing fully what to do I grab the ring pull and rip that shit out like it's a fucking beyblade thinking faster is better.
>That ring pull would've won me the fucking championship of bayblading I swear.
>Her ass was gushing blood from her torn hoop
>She's screaming loudly
>I panicked and ran the fuck out of there as fast as I could
>Her brother and dad are calling me an hour later
>shitIamsodead.exe
>Went to visit her at the hospital
>She's got her legs in stirrups, bandages stuffed up her ass
>She sees me and starts shouting at the top of her lungs

Didn't see her again after that.

you fucking moron.

Use babywipes, man.

>under her bellybutton
fucking kek

I was super stressed out and was taking everything way more seriously than I should have been. I could barely get my dick up lmao.

I lost mine the very last month of being 19 somewhat fitting I suppose

>she's clean

The lottery numbers to the lotto that night

painful

where the penis is supposed to go.

So any tips for a grower?
I'm like 1in soft but 6.5 hard

Don't be discouraged if they don't react the way you would hope they do.

I'm the same way and I consistently surprise girls who think they're going to be disappointed.

ye to read, who the fuck asked for greentext stories

>.exe
Back to plebbit, normie.

always stay hard and never go near water

>the hole is lower than you think
most people know this one but it doesn't hurt to reiterate. btw by lower I mean closer-to-the-butthole, further from the bellybutton

>you can't expect to jam your whole dingus in there on the first pump
I'd seen too much pr0n where the guy always just seems to effortlessly slide in on the first go. What you don't see is that they apply lube off-screen or that these chicks take so much (and such large) dick that they're more stretched out and ready to go. Expect your first few pumps to be very shallow, and eventually you'll be fitting your whole member in there

>the extent to which porn can be detrimental to your arousal
you're with a naked chick; your hormones should be firing on all cylinders. You shouldn't be feeling "meh" about the situation. It's also probably not normal to last such a long time on your first go. I've started to see porn like shooting yourself in the foot

large condoms are uncomfortably tight

>my mom's benz
Confirmed spoiled white boy

I actually have a pretty embarrassing story about that.

My first time, I was having trouble getting it up because I was so anxious. So I had the brilliant idea to watch some porn to help me.

hahaha that fucking failed so badly.

lube

Same

There's a sort of beginners luck that some virgins have.

> Some virgins last 10 seconds and cum almost immediately
> Some virgins have death-gripped their cock so often, and for so many years, that they have a lot of trouble cumming

I was in camp 2. It was very difficult to get myself hard, but once I was, I couldn't cum because she wasn't as tight as my white-knuckling hand. So I just kept going, and going, and going, until I noticed that my balls and thighs were wet and she was incoherent, then I passed out from dehydration/tachycardia.

I cut back from masturbating 3-5 times per day to 1-2 times per week, and it's insane how much more sensitive I am.

Be careful! They don't have a penis like we see on the internetes

That i was gay

this basically

also: try condoms that fit your size beforehand and keep some of your brand handy, theres nothing worse than having to use too small or large condoms, they ruin the experience.
You should also grow comfortable with condoms in general, its quite common to lose the mood if you arent familiar with the feeling of having to wear one during sex

always double knot

stronger ropes.

THIS - had a lot of trouble because of camp 2 too, fixed it, but she left because I still took too long and she couldn't enjoy it anymore

That girls don't have penises.

Are you telling me there are traps out there born without cocks??

Shrooms keep you from cumming

that she was girl...with a dick

This

The vagina is lower down than you think it is.

fuck you haha

Cheat cheat cheat, don't break up and just cheat because nothing matters but pussy when you're young with no kids...bust on foreheads every time

that her mother was a lot better at it

Of course they fucking do.

Found the virgin.

Don't try to fuck her jackhammer-esque style to impress her. Literally the head of my penis felt like mulch for a solid week.

Luckily she didn't hate me after that.

is 5in enough

It smells.

10/10

How to fuck

kek

itz only smellzz

That Girls not have penis

So you visit her at the hospital and she starts screaming? Rude bitch.

i lost mine in a time before internet porn. that was some serious new world explorer shit.

insane

This.

Main points:
>Hole isn't actually where you thought it is
>It takes more foreplay/longer warming up period before you can put your dick in
>Faster/harder isn't better

And the most important one: Vagina doesn't look, smell, or taste as appealing as one would think from all the porn/HD pictures of these good looking whore women. Even if a vagina doesn't have an infection/smell like fish, it still has a strong almost pungent odor by itself that isn't necessarily good but isn't bad. It also just tastes like fucking salt/sweat and even if they do take a shower you find yourself having no taste or the taste of your own dried up saliva. It isn't that great

duct tape

This guy gets it

Unfortunately this man has yet to find a woman with a sweet delicious pussy. Maybe that will change when you're older than 16.

How bad? I'm okay with stomaching shit tasting food so would I be alright eating out a chick?
Also I know the "write out alphabet" trick but is there anything else to know?

If she is screaming, flapping around and crying, then it's not legally ok.

What's camp2?
I'm curious because I experienced the same thing
Glad i'm not alone lol

You're giving bad advice because you're a child.

A relationship can last even if you are attracted to other people. This is why the new youth behave as subhumans.

>Confirmed virgin

It isn't shit tasting or anywhere close to that unless you would have some nasty ass girl I'm sure. You just have to communicate with her. I'm not so sure about the alphabet trick even though i've tried it, but never had any feedback from it. Just pay attention to how she responds on where you're licking/sucking and if you're going faster or slower. Also asks her what feels better to her.

But honestly, all that being said, it's one of those things you have to have experience to git gud at it. No amount of reading or prep is going to prepare you for it. It's going to be bad either way. Hopefully for you, just like I had, your first time will be with a girl that's understanding and perhaps even let you experiment or show you the ropes.

Eat the booty also from time to time

had me weak

good way to get sick

You can get herpes and HPV while wearing a condom.

if they clean properly and not leave remnants of shit or fart in your face, eating ass is fucking amazing

Its fine. Just try to hit the wall of her vagina next to her stomach.

Ummmm... Wish I knew I needed anal to cum... Or just fucked a dude instead, back when I was like 15.

All girls like to toy with other people emotions,expecially when her "friends" give "advices" on the bf

i lost mine with 21.
now, 9years later, i'm married and have 2 children.

>rip that shit out like it's a fucking beyblade
>would've won me the fucking championship of bayblading I swear
>beyblade

dead lmao

Wait, how stupid are you !?!

>try to hit the wall of her vagina next to her

this or just the wall in general

not sure why it works

literally where the G spot is usually

Wish I knew what the aids virus was... Now we have aids baby and aids to boot...
That was five years ago... I beat it every day and keep it in a cage but it never gets easier or any less aids... Life is hard... I cum on my aids wife's head everyday ( I keep her locked in the basement ) and now its all hardened so its like she has a helmet... I'm afraid she'll use her cum helmet to break free... So tonight I will burn them both to the ground while they are still mine to keep... Forever. Life is hard. But they will live on in the aids she gave me all those years ago. Life is hard.