Ask a 35 year old who just jacked off for the first time in his life anything

Ask a 35 year old who just jacked off for the first time in his life anything

no thanks

^

are you asking your self: "why the hell not earlier?"

Why are you such a fag?

Oh my god yes. My whole body went fucking numb

I assume you are a sexually surpressed christian
I assume you are Murican
I assume this is bait
I assume you vote Trump
I assume you are a little faggot which is basicly what I assumed just before

how much of this is true?
and what du you assume about me?

Lol shut up you Lego head OP

Very sexually surpressed catholic. Parents were douchebags.
Yes i am american
Nope its not bait
And i am not voting this election
I assume youre from the EU and you are the type of summer fag to call everything he sees bait.

That'll be 20 Haily Marys, OP.

God bless you.

FUCK OFF YOU UNDERAGE B&

why now? what did you mastrubate to?
how do you feel with all these haters?

not bad
though i don't even know what a summer fag is

Been on here for years and the curiosity kinda got to me so i tried it out. I jacked off to alexis texas. And i could care less honestly.

do you know the "battle pope" comics?

Nope havent heard of em.

Answer OP

Sup Forums is full of wierd people, from all nations,
racist russians, bigots, communists americans, non-fappers, chronical fappers --- canadians
here is everything what is fucked up

>Parents were douchebags
How?

I dont know, why are you so desperate for a reply?

should try, typic american, only someone with a breakthrough (coming out as an atheist) and abnormal high knowledge of the bible could do such a thing

Kept me sheltered for all the years i lived with them
No internet, homeschooled, not allowed many friends, things like that. Kept under extreme watch at all times.

Further proof that you are a summerfag.

On a scale of 1 to 10, rate the pleasure.
Also how big was your load?
Are you a virgin?
This is medically fascinating.

what did you learn from this?

Ill give it a look, nice trips btw

ohhhhh helll nooooo, got it
if been through many winters fucker

Impossible. Even if you were taught it's wrong, you would do it and then feel guilty after.

Gonna do it again? What am I saying, of course you are.

what did you fap to?

I hope their strictness will not kill your faith in Jesus Christ and the One, Holy, Catholic and Apostolic Church which He founded.

did you have sex before?

On a scale of 1-10? Id say it was a solid 9. And yes i am a virgin.
I figured you guys would find this interesting, thats why i came here.

What are you trying to communticate here user?

How much jizz did you shoot? Are your balls huge from pent up semen?

holy shit, kys if not b8

I think it was a mistake on their part, made me rebel against their beliefs and values more than stick with them. All in all i learned that their values and morals fucking suck.

Couldn't care less*
If you could care less it means you care at least a little bit

Would you describe yourself as a broken man, because your life sounds pretty depressing tbh.

I just try to not think about work i have to do, i'm bored with it, have to write my thesis, it is morning in europe

Anyone have the vid of that fag with basketballs for nuts and shoots a massive load until his balls diminish

How old are you?

Nice trips sir, and yeah holy fucking shit i did not expect this kind of mess.

r u a man?

Fascinating.
Do you plan on jacking off more?
There is a whole world of different techniques and porn for you to explore now, OP.

My life is actually okay, i have a job i like and i like where i live. I definetly intend on getting married some day, just gotta wait for the right person to come along.

Can you show us your junk?

so my friend mybe it was no mistake at all and the faith is with them, not the way they thought or like, but it is there perhaps, all these paradox like forgiving but punishment, and love but no sexuallity, it does not work

what is "the" evil you think?

Ah, fair enough I guess. A summerfag is a kid who goes on Sup Forums in the summer. Good luck with the thesis.

uhhhhhh next mistake comming
not the right person please, there are a many right persons, not only one, still its hard enough to find, don't ya think

I definitely do. Relieved quite a lot of stress from these past couple of weeks.

You're a moron that just wasted 33 years of your life. What fucking information could you possibly have to enlighten us?

Good for you OP. Don't jack off too often though, or the pleasure will quickly diminish.

yeah not really, im here some times to chat or try to troll bigots, na its bachelor thesis

The evil is not letting a kid explore his natural curiosity.

>33 years
>OP is 35
Are you suggesting that masturbation starts at 2 years old?

Yes.
What? You expect a new born should start masturbating? Fucking monster.

If jacking off is the thing that makes your life, than i dont think im the one whos been wasting it user.

I came out of the womb beating off

yes this too, but actually it is more than that, evel is surpressing people and your self without honoring the selfwill of the subject

racists are evil, also most fanatics, list is long

best response

Kek

You guys are on some next level shit, let me tell ya.

i call this wincest

I was beating off in the womb.

while getting fucked
good girl

I suggest you try anal stimulation while you masturbate, a friend of mine suggested it when I was in my teens, he said his gf puts anal beads in his butt and pulls them out when he cums he also said it was the best orgasm he ever had in his life, well I thought that it was kinda gay to put things up my butt while I fap so I never tried it until I was in my late 20's well that was a mistake because now I can't masturbate without anal stimulation because the orgasm are much more intense and I just can't go back to regular masturbation because of that intensity.

Yeah i think ill take it slow...

>And yes i am a virgin.

Holy shit, you are 35 and you just busted your first nut? It must have been a liter of spooge. How could you function and how long have you been out of your parents house and why didn't you take care of that first thing?

muhahaha
id does not work with all man,
it does not work with me, i tryed, maybe wrong

WHAT have your WETDREAMS been about?
you sad you had not much contact
is it like porn?

Why do you feel compelled to lie to strangers on the Internet?

he is a mega beta, and had no other chanse to be diffrent, thats why

Youre fucking kidding me....

What made you decide to fap now?

LIES

have you ever had sex

You gotta chase the pussy bro. Its not just gonna come to you.

>How could you function and how long have you been out of your parents house and why didn't you take care of that first thing?

Please answer this. Did you just move out of your parents house today or some shit?

> 35 year old
> first time