I need help Sup Forums
I have a job starting Monday, and they didn't mention a drug test until yesterday. I've been smoking pot heavily for the last 2-3 years. No way I'll pass. I could just tell them I won't pass, but I'm afraid then they won't hire me. I could get clean pee but I'm worried that I'll fuck it up or be watched while 'peeing'.
What do?
>>>pic unrelated obviously
Other urls found in this thread:
ecx.images-amazon.com
en.wikipedia.org
twitter.com
...
Depends on how long ago the last time you smoked pot was..
...
Thursday
...
You dont deserve a job, pothead.
Now get your life fixed up and come back when it is.
...
Unless you buy a detox kit or clean bag of piss with pocket warmers around it you're fucked
Then you're screwed :D
Should've thought ahead there bud.
Pot stays in your system for atleast 5 days till 3 weeks and in extreme case a month.
...
why won't you just admit that you'v been in amsterdam last week, or washington or any shit where it's leagal.
then they will take re-test after months and just don't smoke anymore.
also admit it before the test
I could get a friend's clean pee. But worried about the execution.
I know. I'm fucked.
Bye detox water it will clean your system in two hours. Dont smoke until after test. Have fun my dude and good luck with the job
^this^
Pre-employment screening is no where near as invasive as military or parole urinalysis. Last time I did one they let me into a bathroom with a closed door. I was worried about the sound because there was little insulation, but my elmers glue bottle filled with pee, tucked into a small water bottle pouch with a handwarmer, and then ductaped to my inner thigh worked wonders.
It is risky but you gotta risk it for the biscuit
I could, I'm close to Colorado. Problem is I'm fucking fat, and that shit is stored in fat cells. I could test positive for up to 3 months according to some websites.
tell someone "I took a trip to Colorado, what the fuck do I do now?"
You could go the 'cleaning up my life' route as suggested a few posts back.
Because bringing in clean piss won't work.
Just admit beforehand and tell them you decided to turn your life around etc. (and don't be an ass and start after a later test because they'll be rechecking ya, guarantee it)
plus, its not like they are gonna call the cops if you fail. its worth a try and if you fuck it up then you just wont get the job
I have never been watched while taking a piss test. Go get clean piss.
That's what I was thinking.
"I just graduated college and I always thought I would stop afterwards. I really want this job and I'll work hard and blah blah blah..."
Something along those lines
Was a heavy smoker when I passed. Do these things.
1. Water/Cranberry juice the night and morning of the test
2. Eat a large steak or creatine pills the night of (to counteract dillution)
3. b-12/b-2 in large doses so it isn't clear
4. Dont let it be the first piss of the day and dont collect the first few ounces.
You are not as screwed as your thing, you have a day to prepare.
3 months is bs..
They'll be able to check it for up to a month or so, after that the toxins won't be noticable for tests.
Tell them you took Benadryl for allergies. With the cheap-and-quick tests they usually do, antihistamines give false positives for marijuana.
There is a test that can tell the difference, but it's a lot more expensive. Most places will just take your word for it.
If they run the more expensive test, then I don't think there's any way to escape. Sorry.
Was also considering this. Don't know how effective it is though.
Yeah if it's employment it's not invasive like parole or military where they watch you pee. Just obtain clean piss and make sure you have a way to keep it warm.
Keep in mind, those people were young too.
They probably done some stuff too.
(don't admit that you used heavily, and also, don't overplay it and tell you used once in a blue moon)
I'm fat as shit. Heard keeping it in your gooch is a good way to keep it warm, but will it be warm enough?
Yeah if you're fat don't try to clean out your system two weeks minimum for fatties, and that's for one time use. Clean piss best option.
...
Just go to a head shop and get a bottle of fake piss.
oil change
Drink vinegar dude
That's the way I'm leaning now. Where to get unlubricated condoms?
I'd have your rig/whatever you're gonna put it in ready to go and have your friend give you the piss in a parking lot right near the place just before your appointment. Maybe use hand warmers but probably not necessary. Just sit on it.
I wish it was that easy.
You all are talking about taking clean piss along..
It's not the fucking military whom he has to take the test for!
Just admit to former use, that you cleaned up, it's not some evil overlord shit going on everywhere.
That's the thing, I'm supposed to come in to do orientation shit and then get tested. I could have a condom of pee in my gooch for a while, but worried about temp.
Probably walmart
Why?
If you drink 10 gallons of vinegar
You would be fresh
Or have you ever watched the entourage?
Glue bottle with pvc pipe tape to seal the ridges and a small piece of scotch tape to keep it from opening
...
You're getting tested at the job site? If it's a pee test they almost always send you to a third party clinic...just have your buddy meet you right beforehand.
...
"i dont have a job starting tuesday"
ftfy
Actually I have a temp job set up for another place where I won't have to piss for sure, just would much rather have this job.
That's why I'm worried. If it's a place that only tests pee won't they be more scrutinous?
If you go in and beg they will just tell you to go home. Synthetic is detectable now, masking is near impossible and using someone elses can be tricky.
edgy, kid
doesn't matter where you got it, it's zero tolerance
The only thing he needs to "clean up" is his obesity. There's nothing wrong with pot.
This doesn't work. They know about all of these tricks and unless it's a bottom of the barrel testing place they WILL check.
So, what then? Clean piss from a friend?
>3mos is BS
Ehh, I pissed dirty after 2mos but I did smoke weed all day everyday. I could see a lardo who does lots of dabs getting to 3mos. Passed a home kit but failed a lab test the next day.
...
Your only chance is a piss bag with clean piss, taped to your thigh by your balls or in your arm pit to keep it the correct temperature. There's no detox kit in the world that will make you pass in such a short time. You can also drink a shit load of water and take niacin to make your watered down piss yellow and hope that it's watered down enough that they don't detect it.
Oh shit nice I got trips. Maybe they'll being good luck
I am commercial driver
Piss test every 10 days for the last 11 years
My company even tests for nicotine
Any stimulant of any kind can get you terminated
If caffeine levels are too high, get a warning, suspension, termination
Any narcotics ans immediate termination
Non-work federal DUI/DWI for a CDL holder is .04, for my company anything above .02 is termination
I drink 1 soda a day, 12oz, spaced out over my 11 hour driving day
I work 70 hours, 5, 14 hour shifts and am then off for 10 days
I haul radioactive waste
When we do our piss tests, they offer you a blood test as a backup, I always have both, then the breath test, failure to produce a sample within 60 minutes is termination, when you piss your pants are down past your knees, shirt up to chest and you piss in a plastic cup you hold in your left gloved hand, 2 technicians watch, one is the tester, one is the observer, refuse to piss in front of them, termination
I have a HS diploma, barely, and no other real skills other than I am a great driver, got the job after my 4 years in the Army, driving trucks, still in the reserves, this job has a mandatory retirement at 50, pension, 401k, IRA
For all I have and what it means for my family, my future, until I retire, no alcohol, ever and no dope fueled haze is worth throwing all I have away
Blaze away, just find a job that doesn't care
...
...
...
stop smoking pot you liberal hippie