Ask a mormon anything

Ask a mormon anything

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Why do you believe in a magic book?

why do i check em?

idk. We were told to. and i believe it

How many pairs of temple garments do you own? Also, what the fuck are you doing on /b?

do you doubt your religion at all?
and bump for trips

Op here. I currently do not own any temple garments. I just use the temples. And im a bad mormon

How's it feel knowing that the elders fuck all those hot young girls while you cucks are off walking around in third world shit hole countries?

I only worship beyonce she's queen, can you tell me how you're religion is better than yoncė, should I convert or nah,.

Take that Book of Mormon and shove it up your ass you soul soliciting pig fucker.

I do have some doubts. But mostly i believe it all

Why do you guys always show up at my door, even though I politely decline your services? Is it the lemonade I offered? The cookies? I don't understand, I was just being a gracious host, now leave me the fuck alone

what makes Mormonism the correct church?

Usually they only come once if you deny them. It is probably new missionaries of the show up again

Are you gay?

We have the "priesthood" No other religion in the world has this.

whats the point faggot? what do i gain from hanging out with you?.. you have nothing i want.

No i personally am not. We do not hate gay people. We love every one no matter there faith or life style. Unless they are like hitler

The ghost of Joseph Smith told me to tell you to go fuck yourself. He also said there won't be any room for you on planet Kolob. Still want to spend time on /b instead of ruining people's Sunday afternoons by doing missionary work?

I dont understand. Do you mean the missionaries? Well if you do then they teach you more about the church and if you do not want that then that is fine

What are your thoughts on the church of Beyoncé? Should I convert or nah?

Tell him i said hi. Well missionaries do thing on every day of the week. I dont see how we ruin the day by knocking on your door and asking if you want to talk

are you from Utah?

No

Any Utah fags lurkin?
Tville checkin in.

have you met any Utah Mormons?

Yes. They are no different. I am in Nebraska.

I currently go to church every Sunday and it is a crock of shit bro the only good thing is community here is my wife. Fuck the Mormon church and FUCK Joseph smith

Are you tired of wearing that shit...? ummm.... garmend? garment?

Im sorry that you do not enjoy your church. But not all churches are bad.

Will you admit it L Ron did it better than Joe Smith?

I'd rather fuck your wife

We only have to wear "Nice" clothes on sunday

It's a breddy gud book. I've read it 4 times.

What special powers do your magic pajamas convey?

Do you remember our ancient rites brother?

No i cant. Joseph Smith is the true prophet

Yes.

Were you sad when LaVoy Finnicum died?

Ok... another one.
Do you have a recomendation for a temple?

>000

god is a joke

It actually is. Quite a bit of action

Who the fuck said all churches are bad I said fuck the Mormons you dumb fucking cunt. Mornings are the worst religion they hate everyone and think everyone's going to hell except them they are holding society back progression as a people is damned because they're fucking self righteous

why do you all dress like flight attendants

Yes. I have a temple recommend

Do you practice "soaking?"

Also, if you're right, does that mean other non-mormon Christians are going to hell or nah?

Dr. House is not a joke. Neither is god

Is the play any good?

What branch/ward/stake? Did you ever lie declaring tithes so you could get your recommend?

What's Tom Cruse like in real life? Is he really like your king or something?

pffft prophet profit

you don't have the best Smith...Will Smith

Do you believe the anti nigger shit your church has endorsed?

Joseph Smith was a convicted con artist. It's a matter of public record. Doesn't that bother you?

I ment mormon churches. And we are actually really forgiving. You dont understand how hard it is to got to hell in the mormon religion. The only real way to go to hell is if god is truly presented to you and you reject him. We do not hate anyone. We respect every faith

What's your name so I can find where you live and tell your bishops he can be excommunicated for looking at women's tits and pussy. You Center fuck you. You sit here on a website probably the worst website or it least one of them and then you go to church you hypocrite you son of a bitch. You going to a place where people considered sacred that don't look at porn and you sit here draining your cock to other men's wives and then go worship your so-called God and his temple fuck you you're the worst kind of person if there is a hell you will go to it

I did before my mission. Top that faggots.

Ive never heard of "Soaking"
And no. When you pass away you have a chance to change. Like i said. It is very hard to go to hell

Ask a moron anything?
No thanks.

you're confusing the morons with the superior cult, Scientology

Do you understand how absurd the belief in a god is?

Jesus was tried and convicted as well.


Goes with the territory friendo.

Its very funny

Wow, being on Sup Forums and seeing lots of things you are not supposed to see... your recommend is in actual danger. Hope a priest doesn't mind...

>We do not hate gay people. We love every one no matter there faith or life style.
Bullshit. Your church spent 100 million bucks trying to put homos out of their jobs and homes with Prop. 8. You're full of shit

Well i am part of the LDS mormon church. It is the largest branch. And yes i did. Ill repent at some point

How do magnets work?

> checked

How do di-pole magnets work?

Got yourself a set of ugly wives yet?

I've been following this thread I would not want to ask you one goddamn fucking thing you were the most boring son of a bitch I've ever seen on Sup Forums. Please grow a few brain cells realize how retarded the concept of God is especially within the Mormon religion

Where did you see that???

> priest
I've been a priest for 8 years (not OP). Being a priest above the age of 18 is nothing to be proud of.

that's when you put your dick in a girl, but don't move

it's what Joseph Smith did to break in his daughter

It's practically impossible. Denying a true testimony given through witness of the holy ghost is preeeeety hard.

Why did god change his mind about black people in 1978
And what is kolab

So even if I'm an atheist I can still be saved in case there is a God and it happens to be yours?

Soaking is when you put your dick in her pussy but don't move. This is technically not sex since there's no thrusting and Cumming involved. I've read somewhere that some clever Mormons practice it in order to not sin but still get some.

We do not practice Polygamy

Joe Smith became a zombie too?

How far back in your lineage can you find cousin fuckers?

You have have idea what a branch is.

is it in your bible?

Stop wasting your right life and read The CES letter.

Do you think people would have a better understanding of your religion if you just removed the second m from it?

Well. You become a priest when you turn 16 in the mormon church.

When you fuck your wife, do you cut a hole in any old sheet, or do you have to buy a special one?

Not yet. But joseph 2 the smithening is nigh.

Yeah, but Jesus was innocent. Smith was guilty.

Is you bible similar to the Christian one, or is it totally original?

Why?

Bruh, what do you think of Athiests? Are they good, bad, or in-between?

Says you.

Yes. Anyone can be saved

I'm sold

We use the King James Version of the Bible, and believe in the old testament. The primary difference is the exclusion of the Apocrypha (as it's trash), and the inclusion of the Book of Mormon and Doctrine and Covenants as books of holy writ.

nbcnews.com/id/28985504/ns/us_news-life/t/more-million-spent-prop/#.V1jYebsrKM8
Looks like the church's contribution was less, but they still jumped on the hate train. Explain that, if you love everyone.

We do not have our own bible. We have the book of mormon AND the bible. We believe in both.

We don't really care. That's the big difference, we want all people to be saved, but do not look down on anyone for differing belief patterns.

Even after they die?

I've heard my Christian friends telling me that I better let Jesus come inside me before I die, otherwise it's too late.

how does it feel to have pagan origins?

That should say old and new testament. Sorry.

Family is one of the most important things in the LDS church. In order to avoid breaking up families, underage people are not allowed to join if they have parents engaged in homosexual behavior, because it is likely to create a rift.

And if you are a member of the church engaging in gay sex, you are actively turning your back on its teachings, knowingly doing so, making you an apostate.

Gays are welcome in the church. Gay sex is not.
Murderers are welcome in the church, murder is not.
Etc.