I had a bad day at work /b tell me a joke to cheer me up

I had a bad day at work /b tell me a joke to cheer me up

faggot

islam is a peaceful religion that encourages tolerance and love

More pics like this? Love this sort of style. Very comforting.

that's what your dad said
kek

I have a couple more

one more cool pic for you. now tell me a joke summerfag

die

When you die you just pop out the next pussy
>Fucklife.jpg

let me guess...you don't talk to your dad after that kiss anymore do you?

fuck of mate I've been here for way longer than I wish I've been.

Thanks for the pics btw, they were class.

Also I suck dick at jokes so fuck you.
Why was your day shit?

Your life

asked the big boss why he rejected something I proposed and he got all defensive and pissed me off

"Your kind is not welcome here!" says the bartender.

A tachyon walks into a bar.

also I started a startup on the side and I can't raise a second round of funding so I might have to close it down

lol that was so geeky haha

Descartes is sitting at a bar, having a drink. When he is done, the bartender asks if he wants another. Descartes responds, "I think not!" and disappears.

I feel you. In general most people leave jobs not because of shitty wages or stuff, but because of of a shitty manager or boss.

Hang in there.
Make this a thread about comfy images. Post soft piano/instrumental music to go with it for maximum comfort.

is that her grandpa or the neighborhood rapist you think?

Okay, I got one, but it's sort of long, so you guys must keep the thread alive for me, mmkay?

go go

nice pic!

Hard time remembering jokes, so a few more comfy pics for now.

aw thanks Sup Forumsro

That's really nice. Has a sort-of Makoto Shinkai feel to it.

>f

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ok this is one of my own jokes - I'm a mathematician and in uni I tried to write a stand-up act.

My dorm room was so small...it barely had 3 dimensions

a gay guy walks into a bar
.
.
.

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50 faggots walk into a gay bar

how bad op? give some details man, i have some pretty rough days myself but everything will get better as long as you keep on trucking

what do you guys do for a living? I work at a bank

A biologist, a physicist, and a mathematician are observing an empty house. They see one person entering, and make a note of it. After a while, they see two people leaving.

"Clearly the person procreated while inside!" says the biologist.

"Clearly our initial assumption that the house was empty was faulty!" says the physicist.

"There are now -1 people in that house", says the mathematician.

I work in esports. Hard to live by, but it works.

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Big boss doesn't like me as much as I'd want him to and my startup on the side is not doing very well cause I don't have anyone to run it as I work a full time job

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have you ever thought of working in a hotel reception/management in Spain or Greece?

A dog is walking down the road with a walking stick.

A man walks past and asks "Wow that's a nice walking stick, what's it made of?"

The dog says "bark"

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rofl no why would I.

I mean, I could, but why that specifically that locale?

I need vacation

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kek

Don't worry, everything's gonna be alright

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ok nigger here we go

a married couple planned going skiing in their holiday, but unfortunatelly the husband is a very busy man and some important business meetings this week.
so they decide wife should go alone, since they already payd for it and shit.
wife goes and feels lonely.
meets a nice guy they talk and start fuckin in the evening for every evening.
they fall in love and the wife says: "wtf sweety, I dont even know ur full name, only that ur first name is thomas."
Thomas answers: " ye bubu and I wont tell u me last name..."
"why?" asks wifey
"every time i told a woman my last name they laughed in madness about it"
she: " I wont, I swar babe."
Thomas gives in: "ok, my last name is... fresh snow..."
the wife starts crying and dying in laughter and wont even stop for few minutes.
Thomas gets fuckin mad: " u slut, u swore u would not laugh about my name."
Slut finally controlls herself and tells Thomas, still with tears of laughter in her eyes: "Im not laughing about ur name."
"What is it then?"
"before i went to the trip, my husband wished me 20cm of fresh snow every!"

xxxxDDDDDDDD hobe u feeling beddre naw xxxDDD tob geg

because they're pretty awesome in the summer and the rest of the year they are cheap. plus the women are hot. and it's easier than a retail job

What did one tampon say to the other?

Nothing. They're both stuck up cunts.

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thanks Sup Forumsro... I actually appreciate it :)

How do you tell if your daughter is on her period?


Your son's dick tastes funny.

tob geg hahaha
the joke was funny too

To watch the tyranny suck its own dick.

I worked in Valencia one year, and it was hot as fuck. Like unbearably hot.

And I fucking hate that siesta shit because when I want to and buy something cold to drink everything was closed.

I'd not do well there lol

Hey me too OP.
Wanna talk about it?

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sure, what happened?

Alright, so there's this cuck, and he wants his woman to have the biggest, blackest dick ever so that her roastie will forever be to wide and distended for him to pleasure her. He and his wife are both really into the idea.

So after hooking up with several hoodlums and having a gangbang with the entirety of a public housing unit, Hotwife still has a pretty tight cunt and still get off the hardest when her husband, her true love, fucks her. The cuck is beside himself with grief over the fact that he can make his wife cum, when the oldest gangbang participant sits down next to him and says:

"When I was a young man, I participated in the back to africa movement and went to Ethiopia to help Haile Selassie make a great african nation free from white imperialism. Obviously that didn't work out so well for me, but that's besides the point. While working there, I met upon the Noodbix tribe, who had much darker skin and far bigger cocks than anyone I've ever seen. If you really want to find the biggest blackest dick to make your wife a sloppy, used up black owned whore, then you must go to Ethiopia and find the Noodbix tribe.

So the cuck thanks the old man and buys two plane tickets to Ethiopia. Once they land, Hotwifes eyes lust greedily at the visible, enormous bulges on the pants of everyone at the airport. But Cuck is all business.

"Do you know the Noodbix tribe", he asks the nearest cab driver.

"Ah, you're a white cuck and a Hotwife, eh? The Noodbix live deep in the Ethiopian jungle, they are as black as night and use their horsecocks as weapons of war. Few have seen them, but I know someone who knows someone."

So the cab driver drives the couple into the Ethiopian countryside, and the Hotwifes face is pressed againt the cab window, staring at all the black men they drive past. After a few miles, she sees that the bulges begin to look bigger, and she eagerly points it out to her husband.

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Jesus fuck with the captchas.

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lol this started quite well. Had a wee chuckle but only because I'm retarded. Go on.

holy shit more like this please! I love shit with the ocean/lake/sea whatever BODIES OF WATER man

>file too large
Fucking hell. Have another then, ya whiny bitch.

jeez this dude sounds like he is Swedish

Well today I smoked pot on my break.
Now while the kitchen manager doesn't give a shit and smokes as well 2 other non smoking employees said I smelt like weed so he had no choice but to send me home.
He also said he will do everything he can to not fire me but I will still be suspended for a bit.
Then on my way home I rear ended dome bitch there was no damage or anything and I was very apologetic yet she still was a huge cunt.

So yeah in a nutshell I'm in one hell of a funk but I got some dank weed and hash soooo I'll try to just blow my troubles away

How to fit 6 million jews into a car?

I'll see what I can do. My pictures are so fucking disorganised.

Just to add on I know I'm at fault here with it all just still bums me out

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I quit school because of recess. Too many games.

how?

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You're a champ. The small things in life man, and you're one of em right now.

I need something dark and dreary yet chill like ill give you an example

How did i get out of Iraq?

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Iran

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In the fucking ashtray, ya nimcompoop.

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Why was the broom late to class

Here's one with the sea at least.

+1 kek

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A salesman is going door to door in a community. He knocks on a door and a young boy drinking scotch and smoking a cigar opens the door.

The salesman says, "Young man, are your parents home?"

The boy pulls the cigar out of his mouth and says, "What the fuck do you think?"

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It swept too long feel better bro

he...overswept?

What's black and sits at the stop of the stairs?.......a cripple in a house fire.

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Why are Jews like oranges ......they're always being concentrated

Theres a mexican, a black guy and a white guy..
a geenie agrees to grant them each one wish..
the mexican asks for all of his people to be happy and in mexico.
so POOF.. the wish is granted.
the black guy asks for all of his people to be happy and back in africa.
POOF.. the wish is granted.
the geenie finally goes up to the white guy and says, "what will your wish be?"
the white guy says,"you mean to tell me that all of the blacks and mexicans are out of the country?"
the geenie says,"of course! that is what they wished for!"
so the white guy says,"then i guess i will have a coke."

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I heard after they fix up the Orlando nightclub Pulse, they are going to have a grand reopening. I think they should pick a new name, maybe "Flatline"...

HOW DOES IT END YOU CUCK