I'm a 33 yr old white male living in WI. About to have a baby girl. First time parenting advice...

I'm a 33 yr old white male living in WI. About to have a baby girl. First time parenting advice? What should I teach the next generation? How can I be a good dad? Bad dad?

Your kids see everything you do:

Every interaction, how you solve problems, how you show respect, how you show love, how you deal with anger.

They see it all. Like tiny little sponges. They might not remember but consciously but subconsciously they do.

Remember that you are their example about how to interact with the world and others.

saw this thread with no replies and felt bad for you, so good luck from me!

Don't rape it.

Be a better father by teaching your daughter what to expect with a man's body rather than her learning in the "wild" with some fumbling boy who doesnt know what to do. Show her what a man's erection looks like, feels like, and tastes like. She will grow up to be a better wife to someone for it.

What will you do if it comes out black?

Can I rape your baby?

Teah her first how to fend for herself against school bitches and horny jocks. Teach her how to bite,kick,scream and all that.
Haavung all these cool idea on how to raise your kid is fine until a stranger snatches her up one day. In a flash, your little girls gone.
Teach her to scream, kick,yell fire anything. Give her one of those keychains that look like cats but can be used to stab somone.

Be the person you needed as a child

well steer that bitch away from social media and faminism, otherwise shes more likely to be a slut. makeup ruins your skin and Sup Forums is no place for daughters.....well, not yours anyways.

Rub her pussy daily. Bring her to orgasm every day for the first 2 years. She will be more open to letting your teeny tiny cock penetrate her if she's trainned well. Also teach her to love the taste of cum. You should feed her your semen daily so she's used to the taste. Also teaching her the value of keeping secrets would only be beneficial to you.

call her KikeSlaughterer

never change Sup Forums

send her nudes out so no one else can

> never change
> it is so different compared to when i posted that
how time goes by eh?

Don't let her near yoyr neighbors shed.

Speaking from experience.

I don't know how to do the thing that references each comment, but thanks for the actually good advice, no I'm not going to teach it about sex...like that. Awkwardly with great intent one day verbally, and no you can't assault my baby. I'll let you think about it though.

let them near my shed, i live next to this user

he has no idea what hes talking about, there is kittens and candy in it!

Teach it to hate what you hate.

If its a girl, put ur dick in it right away, ur never gonna have a tighter pussy than on day 1.

click post # newfag

Teach her to fight and play cool instruments like guitar or something. That way she'll have talents and not be a whore blowing some guy for a ride home. It may not make sense now, but it will later.

This, please don't give her access to social media. And if you're white never buy her short shorts. I've noticed white girls of all ages wear the shortest fucking shorts imaginable and that shit's weird. I never see a black girl wear them, but only the white ones. That's why they gargle Jason's little boy penis behind the whataburger. So in shorts no social media, short shorts, and teach her cool shit.

Teach her to never trust Blacks or Jews.

Teach her to worship bbc and cuck her white bfs

You can make roughly 500k usd by selling your baby in eastern europe if it's female.

You can always make another kid, and your wife won't even miss it if she doesn't have time to build a bond.

Consider it, I guess.

No one cares, go to sleep jeff.

My very first bit of advice would be, not to Sup Forums. GTFO and find a credible source of advice.

You're going to fuck her up for life no matter what you do.

Please teach it more than 1 religion, teach the baby to read all religions and then chose all or none for herself. Do not forget to clean her, yeas infections are a no when it comes to girls. Let a baby cry it is good for their lungs not to long but long enough. When the pitch of the cry changes you will know if they want attention or the diaper needs a changing. So much more but GL and congrats.

I think I shall print this for the baby book. Some horrible, interesting and not too shabby thoughts...great job strangers....

33 year old father of 4 girls.

The best advice I can give you is treat them all like fucking terrorists.

There's no fucking negotiating, and if they don't abide, then you sanction their asses back to the stone age. and if that doesn't work, then you invade their country and install martial law until a new constitution is written where you are in 100 percent abso-fucking-lute control!

good luck friend...

honestly, this is likely true, but that dosent mean you cant try not to, you will make mistakes, you will stumble, you will get up and continue, life will go on and if you are lucky, the DANGO WONT EAT YO BABY!
pic related, its a hungry dingo, he wants yo baby.

Babies aren't dishwasher safe

Dont let her wear makeup ever like fight her about it. It ruins ur skin. Women wear it, get acne, and need to buy more. Its capitalism ointment
Make sure she wears a bra that fits her so her titties stay perky. Dont let her get fitted at victorias secret
Dont let her shave. Make her wax.
Let her know to hold out on sex until the guy gets to know her first. And only to fuck someone she feels crazy abt.
20 yr old her will thank u for all this shit.

do this, when they rebel, i get some tight snatch on the recovery!

>one of those keychains that look like cats but can be used to stab somone

damn i want one of those.

To be a good parent all you need to know is "dont put your dick in it"

there are no rebellions in a totalitarian state my friend

Just be there dude. Me and my wife split when my daughter was one. She's 3 now , mom's a whore . I see her maybe 2 days a week. I've literally missed out on everything special about having a child.

you forgot a "not" in there somewhere.

i must have imagined the tight rebellious pussy last week then...my bad.

Teach her to be respectful of others but maintain her own boundaries.
If you actually own a television, sell that shit and NEVER let her watch anything that isn't a simple informative documentary about nature or something.
Be strict with her with many things but make sure she knows you'll always be there for her when she needs you, make sure she doesn't end up resenting you for being strict.
Make good memories, have her play soccer or something, make sure her friends aren't bad influences.
And most of all, Sieg Heil.

what does your mom being a whore have anything to do with it?

Alright I was gonna troll you. I don't know if you're serious. But I'm gonna treat this like it is.
Whatever you do, DO NOT LET YOUR CHILD BECOME ONE OF US

Lots of people teach their kids that it doesn't matter how many friends you have or how many parties you go to. IT FUCKING DOES.

I am a prime example of what happens when you don't care about having a social life. Nothing will get them farther in life than friends.

Make absolutely certain they're a normie. Normies have it great. If you want your kid to grow up happy, TEACH THEM TO BE NORMAL. If you want them to grow up hating themselves, wondering what could have been, and most of all resenting YOU for their upbringing, teach them to be different.

TL;DR: DON'T BE DIFFERENT. BE NORMAL. Normal kids end up happy, different kids don't.

This faggot gets it. The things they pick up on that you do and then you see them do is unreal. Just get naps while you can
The first 6 months afford little rest.

If you get to frustrated from something go outside for a minute or 2.

Learn to be fucking patient. They know nothing.
And remember whatever they want within reason it is your duty to provide. It's amazing how selfish you'll realize you've been thru life.

Good luck user, you're about to experience one of the only miracles we get a chance to see. You'll walk into the hospital you, and come out a better version of you immediately. If you don't then somethings wrong with you.

got me right there at the end

There is no advice that can prepare you. It is the ultimate test of your patience and will.

You do not know the definition of patience untill you have to hold a screaming baby from 10 pm till 5 am solid. SOLID NON STOP SCREAMING FOR 7 HOURS.

If you don't throw your kid out the window doing you're doing good.

Also you do not nap anymore. You will not believe how much you slept before you had a kid. Get comfortable with 3-4 hours sleep every night for at least the first 2 years.

im fixing to turn 30, have a 6 month old daughter. just pay attention to her, enjoy the little moments you get with her. don't stress too much about her crying or waking up at night... time flies by. seems like my daughter was just born and could do shit, shes already holding her bottle herself, trying to walk and talk. make her laugh, nothing like hearing your kid laugh like crazy the first time.

I call them the belly giggles. Those ones that are super deep. I tickle the shit out of my kids just to hear it

> If you don't then somethings wrong with you
this is what i have experienced my whole life.
OP better stay off Sup Forums for the next 10 years also.

Yup tickles are the best.

it's not your parent's fault you're one of us.


also, i kept my autism on the DL throughout HS/College and somehow managed to be social. parties and stuff are fun, but it's not that great. i wish i was more productive and spent a lot of nights wishing i was alone. regret is inevitable, the grass is always greener etc.

Either bait, or, you do realize where you are right? This isn't facebook. In case you need a reminder, fuck you jew nigger loving faggot.

You should probably move out of the Midwest. Those people are the worst. It's child-abuse if you stay.

How do you mean experienced it user?

i wish i had a good childhood
OP i generally just troll and shitpost threads like these, but.....be good to her, many of us had messed up childhoods and if we are really honest with ourselves, we smile on the outside and laugh at the world to cover up the pain.
dont let her feel the same pain we feel, dont ever let her feel so alone as we do.

knowing there was something wrong. dont want to get into it, going to bed now.
good night Sup Forums

Her mom / the ex wife

This, from a current single parent. The older they get, the easier it is. If someone offers to 'babysit someday', oerce them into giving you an actual date and agree on it. You won't believe how many people won't be there for you, or will assume you've figured everything out already. The second you refse an invitation somewhere, nobody will ever contact you again. Your life will literally disappear. Do the things now-try a drug for the first time, go drinking, travel somewhere on a plane. You will be doing approximately none of that for at least five years.

>you done goofed

your bitch is going to own you now.

better not piss her off or its 18+ year of child support check off your ass.

Baby's love eating noses. They will cry, a lot. Resist the urge to shake them or yell. You will want them to be quiet, they will not be quiet until you figure out why they are crying. Hungry, diaper, need a cuddle, gassy, cholic. The last one will kill your will to live. Take shifts, don't make the wife do everything or your marriage will crumble like a sand castle at high tide. Pay attention to your kids, talk to them, play with them. They will copy every word you say and they learn swears faster than anything else. They will ask the same question over and over. Answer that question over and over. In public, if they are throwing a fit, don't get angry, don't yell, ask them why they are upset, tell them to calm down and explain why they are freaking out. Explain why they can't have the thing they want, be calm, be mature, show them how to properly resolve conflicts by being logical and rational. Act like a loud angry dick and they will learn that you win annargument by yelling louder or making the other person give in out of frustration. Set boundaries and enforce them. Show them you love them, show them you care, show them the person you want them to become. Be strong, be kind, be reasonable. You are about to love something so much it will scare the fuck out of you, don't panic. Love them enough to be a better person. Good luck.