Go on
Go on
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i once ate a whole pizza in one sitting
/thread
When I was 15 I masturbated 24 times in a 24 hour period to win a competition.
I can masturbate without any physical stimulus
I've divided by zero
I'm MooT.
op is a fag
My first lay was a pornstar-quality prostitute and cost $1000 for 2 hours.
I've only ever cheated in a webbrowser game to win a GOTY of a real game that is worth around ~60 bucks
i once fingered a girl in a sousaphone case in highschool
I'm Bill Murray.
I'm getting a blowjob right now.
Every girl I've ever played the guitar for (except family of course) fucked me the very same day.
At least 10 in college so far, many others from high school.
Best skill choice I've ever made.
I´m not a virgin
I once had sex with a Korean newly Wed on a flight between Seoul and Sydney, without speaking one word to her before, during or after. I didn't even know her name. And her new husband was sitting next to her, asleep.
I worship the sun.
You think you did but you actually didn't.
Timestamp pic faggot.
I met a girl on Sup Forums in 09 when they still had contact threads on here for aim,3 years later when she was 18 I flew to cali and fucked her in her room while her parents slept lol
Adolf Hitler wanted international war criminal (death penalty) is currently living in Queensland Australia & using australian military intelligence grade weaponry of elecetromagnetics to harrass me daily for 3 years straight now (been stalking me for a decade before that, im his biological son) through criminal assault; violence.
the old cracker has psychosis, schizophrenia, egocentrism, dyslexia, neurosis, permanently disabled. senicide
we are anonymous
we are virgins
Every night i regret all the decisions i made that brought me where i am today
i lost my virginity to my father.
and did you win?
Im learning guitar
>got a blowjob from 2 sisters
>one was 14 and the other was my age, 17
Almost told the older sis when i was on a good one, shouldve done it
Before I post ultra nationalist and white wing posts on Sup Forums I usually fap to gay furry porn
i believe u old fart
I've never drunk chocolate milk in my entire life and I have no desire to do so.
Nigguh. This is the main reason Ive been thinking about picking up the guitar lately. I played it for 5 years and forgot everything, should probably start relearning.
I raped my sister in law when she was blacked out drunk
The most romantic thing ive ever heard
>call prostitute
>hey baby lemme play u stairway 2 heaven b4 we get to the main attraction
U give us true neo-nazis a bad name.
how far along are you?
>i can help you cut the learning curve.
Had a 3some and didn't even cum
I did.
Totally normal outside of the US.
Stairway to Heaven won't get you far but learn to play like this and women melt like butter. No joke.
Nowhere really, im really bad
Tell us about it
I'm moot.
I have half a million dollars and im unhappy
Kek
...
See
at a rate of 500-1000 times EVERY SINGLE DAY NOT ONE BEAT MISSED IRRELEVENT OF ACTIVITY FOR THREE YEARS STRAIGHT THE GUYS INSANE
i dont talk to it i dont communicate with it i dont work with nor against it yet it persists and remains, mentally carstrated
not a lot to tell. molested since 9. had sex when i was 14. i've made threads before and posted pics. he's dead now, so i dont mind talking about it.
...
you cant sit once
Yeah it was I loved her to hell and back can't believe this shithole got me laid
Did you kill him with your anus ?
>some faggy whitebread shit
nah m8
latin is the way to keep them coming back
youtube.com
>t. full time jazz guitarist
I met Stevie Ray Vaughan about 6 months before he died
>excess money
>unhappy
>"ridiculous"
nothing new
Lucky fucker
Can I have a few hundred bucks so I can get an apartment?
is this the part where im asked to post pictures of my breasts? (again.)
I suck at life.
stfu and take your thorazine
I once fucked a mango. It was meh.
Shit I assumed you were a dude.
But ok. Send us pics of the breasts that were so irresistible to her father.
Maybe you're my ex
I dont know the story, so tell it again for those like me, guy or girl?
I suffer from crippling depression and lonliness
Pic related
Ive 2 scars on my loins and one scar on my balls.
boring
Probably true.
You obviously need to unload some of that to a poorfag, gives you an altruistic sense of self-worth. FI7139390054369483
low... i did that for no reason, at same age... just because i was horny... thanks premature erection
Let me guess, the only song you know is "Wonderwall" ? I did the same thing
Seriously any help would be brilliant
Sol invictus
>I like this attention I'm getting
>I'll mention I'm a girl so that I get more of it
I make $900 a week not working a legitimate job
I ate a thurmanator in eight minutes.
Pic related,
Also subbed chips for bacon cheddar fries
>I worship the sun
MAH. NIGGA. Thought I was the only one.
I walked 16 miles in 'round 100 degree weather to Lil Caesars to get some pizza.
Well give me kike 100000 so I can say fuck life and travel everywhere
Aweee bastard, shes gorgeous user, and i assume seeing as how you mer her on Sup Forums shes great
Hey, Americunt, they said ridiculous claims.
I'm probably the most famous person on this entire website.
I masturbate so much that my penis is now deformed and I'm balding at 24 from excess testosterone.
Tits or gtfo
Nah that's the thing, if you play that soft bitch shit they know you're a dime a dozen.
If you can truly shred they will fuck you just for being articulate and great with your hands.
>inb4 (((she))) posts only clevage with timestamp or stock image tits w/o timestamp
I once fucked 3 girls at once, my ex insisting on us bringing girls to our bed on a regular basis, this resutling in me having had a ton of threesomes and the one foursome. Which is awesome.
Yes this is true.
She was rad but also fucked up as hell (go figures) we broke up after she went full blown heroin junkie I still randomly get texts from her though
Help me bro
As someone who works in an industry that serves wealthy populations, I can vouch for this guy. Fully 80% of rich people are MISERABLE AS SHIT. (The other 20% seem perfectly well-adjusted.)
>any half decent guitarist
>unironically using the term "shred"
gtfo poser
I'm a dog
...
Oh shit, sorry to hear that Sup Forumsro, hope things work out for you pal
I have never orgasmed during sex (I'm a man) And I've had over 60 partners
pics of deformed penis
Stick a vibrator in your ass, youll cum buckets
I'm a state, and nation champion fighter. Styles are taekwondo and BJJ. I'm ranked nationally and if you Google my name you'll only see fighting shit.
No, I'm not in the UFC. Yes, I've made money from it.
>I tried committing suicide with a burger.
>tfw Americunt.
stfu and go to bed, Michael
Im hekd a hostage please help im at 2828,$-$+$888 strertt help please