Feel thread

feel thread

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I was going to start my own thread, bumping this instead

THE TRUTH

who /fucked/ here?

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Mate, my life is as good as over

>tfw 25yo
>tfw no idea what to do in life
>tfw no idea what I like really
>tfw I have no real skills
>tfw low paying job that I hate
>tfw no idea how to break that circle
>tfw derpessed because no money
>tfw no money
>tfw never gonna be rich

Anyone in similar position? How do we break this situation? How do we find what do we really want and how to achieve that?

...

Join the Army

I'm clawing together as much money as I can, getting myself some decent gear and I'm hitting the road and finding myself an adventure.

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I came here to help with the healing not the feeling.

I am not retarded, sorry.

Today when I was running I had exactly the same idea. Just buy neccessary equipment and just go travel, help others people and by that earn food or shelter. Share stories and news with people met. Write about everything. I think that it's good idea, however I desire money above everything and this is my problem... I just want money... If I had money not to worry about anything, I would do that in next week. Without spoending it, I just have to have money...

I was in a similar position to you.

The feelings you experience AND the experiences you've had in life - they are neither positive or negative. They are just feelings / experiences. Your own judgement justifies / admonishes it.

Be mindful of your thoughts - and your thoughts are usually ALWAYS emotions.

Emotions are natural, and NEUTRAL. It is perfectly acceptable to feel ANGER, SADNESS, HAPPINESS, GUILT/SHAME, CONFUSION. At the end of it all, that's all emotions boil down to. Those five.

When you realise that all these are natural and acceptable, then all else follows.

Go well.

...

bump

I accept feelings in 100% so I have no idea how did you make your assumptions. Now I feel sad, depressed and angry at the same time because I have no idea who I am and what do I want to do in life (just money). I do not know what pleases me, what I am good at etc. I just feel fucking helpless and I want to cry, and I am gonna cry in bed tonight I bet. Because I can;t stand myself, the way I was raised, the way that perants are not rich while others are and I see plenty of fucking 20s kids in BMWs, porshes, audis all bran fucking new. I will never have a kid if I am poor. Plus I am angry at my past 25 years, I have acomplished nothing worthy. NOTHING. I despise myself. So now I am mixed with anger, hate, powerness and sadness, depression.

Any cure for me?

What if cleans it or got a new set?

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It appears to me that your problem is that you're measuring yourself against your peers (nothing wrong with that, most do it) you're going to have to remove yourself from that lifestyle before you become happy. Money isn't everything, it helps but it isn't everything.

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Hey man, I'm sorry. This is called transactional analysis.

However, you DO know what makes you happy. You do! You're just too scared to admit it!

Same but I wont give up

Acquire aesthetics and dont give a fuck thats how we do it brah
youtube.com/watch?v=_j2-zIOg9c0

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and this ugly black bitch right here is a loser ugly nigger bitch that try to hurt the popular people cause her life sucks like the rest of the ugly bitches that is a loser and the loser people like this ugly nigger bitch loser women right here and try to hurt me but cant get guys before try to steal my friends or copy me but is too ugly to hurt me with sex like this ugly bitch right here and the ugly people losers
so fuck this nigger bitch
look at her head
is looks like a rike
the nigger bitch

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iam nigger

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For me money is everything, trust me. I desire money. I love to have money. You can see me as a dwarf in his treasure room looking at his money and smiling. I would seel my parents for money if the price was good enough.

I do nto want happiness, really. I want money. It makes me happy. I can;t be happy without money. It's a fact.

Everyday I remind my parents that I wish I wasn't born in poor family. I will never do something like that. Rich life or death. I look at rich kids having fun, getting good education, following dreams, spending money on hobbies they can afford. Just having fun in life, living it. And me? Worthless scum. This is what I am.

Now I am at the point again that I think about killing myself. And I started crying. I fucking hate myself, life and other people. I just do not want that. I do not even have money for a psychologist.

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Ok, so I have come to the conclusion that the overwhelming majority of people in this thread are under 18.

I'm the 'transactional psychoanalyst' from above.

Sayonara. See you in my office in a few years!

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Have you considered a bank heist?

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Yes. But I doubt that I could do that, save money and just live my life.

But killing myself and hoping that after that I will be only dreaming or won;t feel anything is better option.

Two answers, one is you can never get it truly clean again, the other is then that metal is untested.

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>tfw you miss someone who doesn't give a fuck about your existence

I feel sory... im 23...

His last set of armour could have been smashed to bits and he needs a replacement. Doesn't make him any less of a knight?

faggit

No, but it makes his armor untested. He has rebuilt it from nothing, and that is admirable, but until it feels the bite of blade or bludgeon then it is still untested.

This guy knows his stuff. Enjoy your life, user.

You know it's really nothing to do with the armour right?

Never had a gf. Finnaly felt in love with one. Oh man, cuddling and playing with her hair while watching adventure time was awesome. I was the happiest men on earth. She is perfect btw, a little bit chubby, long dark hair. MFW when she felt in love in a faggot who was banging other faggots earlier... I still love her

youtube.com/watch?v=FuCloea96Mg
I envy those who are truthfully suicidal. They've got no fears. They're contemplating an exit with a 100% chance of death. At those points, you could do what you want, anything. Steal a car, steal 2 cars. Drag race those cars. Rob a bank. Wrestle a bear. Fucking travel to the Syria and go on a Rambo-esque final stand with the Islamic state. To echo the words of anons before me, the world is your oyster. If it's a 99.9% chance of death, fuck it, it tops suicide. Go out like a champ!

I'm trying my best to enjoy being single. I just can't. I need a female in my life to love and be loved. To let me know I'm special, that I'm worth more than just another cog in the military machine. I want to not hold back due to a P.C. world. I have no choice, I'm the representative of the entire Navy 24/7. And somehow this burden is only compounded when I'm with other sailors(male/female). I want to be appreciated, I want to be intimate, I want to make tender love, I want to feel alive. Instead I feel used, cast aside, abandoned and worthless. As I piss in a tidal wave of piss, I wonder: "Why is it the kind hearted and respectful men like me are Ignored, while shit stains go through women like cheap toilet paper?". It's infuriating, agonizing and intoxicatingly. My only glue is my son, I won't make him into me!

>1 reply
>"nah, my life is pretty good"
KEK. Must be just you then

Join an apprenticeship.. become an electrician or welder. You will get money, with money comes power. You want power, that's all any man wants.

I don't want to pretend I have it as bad as another anons, but I do need to tell this story

>start of school year
>trying to make new friends, get good grades right off the bat, general beginning of year stuff
>meet this girl, let's call her W
>crack a joke involving suicide around W one day that involved suicide
>she gets really pissed off and ignores me the rest of the day
>next day she comes back, apologizes for the way she acted and reveals she tried to kill herself once
>my turn to apologize, "I'm so sorry, i had no idea, etc."
>she accepts, allgoodinthehood.jpg
>over time though, she begins messaging on skype
>we get to talking, and i learn she's still battling depression
>I begin acting as a therapist, trying to help her through it all
>learn she has problems with her home life, abusive grandmother, was bullied a lot
>One day, talks about killing herself
>Stay on the phone with her for an hour trying to talk her out of it
>Succeeds
>Continue trying to help, sometimes though she's aggressive with not wanting help and being resigned about life
>continues like this for a few months
>threatens to kill herself again, call the police this time, despite her frequent pleas for me not to
>she becomes livid that i involved other people and spilled her "secret"

It was at this time i realized she got pissy if she didn't get her way on certain things, not just suicide related matters

>reach the end of the year
>after another couple of months, she's starting to wear me down
>she gets pissy a lot, is making me expend all kinds of emotional and physical energy helping her, then acts resigned and aggressive about her resignation and hopelessness
>after two weeks of internal debate, I decide i need to end things, she was about to see a therapist anyways
>after two more weeks of debate about what to do, she confronts me and pressures me into explaining why i haven't answered her texts in a while
>my exact words were "I can't do this. You and me, I can't do this."

>She begins crying, and walks away repeating "it's okay, I understand, it's ok"
>she texts me half an hour later saying she wants to talk about it, and find a way for us to be friends

i forgot to mention that we had very different interests and personalities, so what really held us together was the fact that i was trying to save her from herself

>i text back explaing that it won't work
>she fights me on it, until I eventually text her "We both just need to move on"
>at this point, she calls me
>I pick up, and on the other end, i hear her bawling and begging me "Please user, we can make this work, I know we can, there has to be a way"
>"W, I'm sorry, but we can't, we just have to go our seperate ways"
>"user, please, there's something, I know there is"
>"W, i've thought about it from every angle, run through every possibility, and nothing worked. We need to move on, we can't go back to the way it was"

She then spoke these words, which will haunt me forever

>"user, please. You're the only one i've ever been able to open up to, the only one who cares about who I really am. All my other friends, they care about who I'm not. Please, you're all I have."

This stunned me, so i was silent for a while until all I could muster was

>"I don't know what to do anymore."
>"well, there's got to be something"
>"I don't know, W! I don't know anymore"
>"Can you at least talk to me for one more month?"
>"I don't know, let me think about it."
>"Can you at least get the answer to me by saturday?"
>"Sure. I have to go."

It's tuesday now, and she didn't reach out to me on saturday or sunday, and i'm still unsure what that means, so I'm gonna try again soon

I'm still shaken up by all of it

I stared into the core of broken person, Sup Forums. i saw the void where a soul was.
It's been my most harrowing experience, and I walked away. I feel like shit.

Yes but the other didn't and I played along

Bruh, you helped her alot.

I'm 16, girl (15) left me for 20 yr old jerk.

Fun life

R2, aside from that, you'll get better

Any fellow artfags lurking? Musical or visual, interested to discover how you guys express your emotions. Share your work.
It's a good way to get thoughts out and onto pages. It's satisfying.
Replace the gaps with instruments and you'll be inspired by your own thoughts, or just gaze outside at the ambience. That's the secret.
I believe talent is a myth, there's a Picasso, and a Mozart in all of us. Not trying to be a 2deep4u faggot, but it's true. Takes dedication.
I tend to think of people as a bland rock at birth, but being moulded through their lives with time. Sculpt yourself into who you want to be with these tools.
clyp.it/sug54snj
Pic/link related, some bullshit I work on when I'm alone with the weekend to waste.

I suppose by r2 you mean weed? If so I have no idea where to get it.

I will get better indeed but jfc thing is she was 'unsure' about her feelings for good 2 months of not longer and during all this time I had all these mood swings, going from depressed to happy af each day - that is very tiring mentally. And now I find out that all this was for nothing... Only things I got from waiting are broken heart and broken phone (rage found an exit). And I am pretty sure guy is your typical jerk with a car, why else would he hang out with 15 yr olds? I'm feeling so fucked

>Be me, 13 years.
>Used to live with my mom, but spend every weekend with my father.
>He dated some girl for like 6 months and she moved with him.
>Nicest person I've ever met.
>When she moved, I found out she had a daughter.
>16 years, amazing looks, but messy hair. Huge tits though.
>We were both too shy to talk to each other.
>Every morning, our parents took us to the beach.
Mothermybodydisgustsme.pdf
>I played Guitar Hero III for hours every afternoon and all she did is to sit back there and watch me play.
>One day, she followed the beat with her feet.
>She loved Black Magic Woman.
>Sat by her side ant played it for her.
>Looked in her eyes.
>What's this? What's this? What...
>First love.
>As days passed by, I became more and more obsessed about her.
>She was my whole world and nothing else mattered.
>Summer arrived and I moved with them too.
>One day, saw her naked by accident.
>I had seen a lot of porn in my father's computer but damn, she was sexier than any other girl.
>Hid under my blankets and re-made every curve of her body in my mind.
>Tried to masturbate.
>But I couldn't, I couldn't I fucking couldn't.
>She seemed so pure...
>We kept having some small talk from time to time.
>I taught her some volleyball's basics and when played everyday.
>She always lost, but she eventually became better and better every time.
>I thought of telling her how I felt about her when she won.
>But she never did because our parents broke up.
>Never saw her again. Never told anyone but you, Sup Forums, about this.
>When I went back by my mother's I fell into a deep depression.
>Really wanted to fix my mind by getting her out of my life.
>But my body felt too heavy and I was too tired.
>Nothing meant anything anymore, nobody would ever love me.
>I knew that ''Cry and you'll cry alone'' thing so I pretended to be happy and became everyone's clown.
>Told jokes, bullied a fat kid, humilliated many people on my way to the top.
>But I became the center of attention.
(1/2)

>dropped out of college
>no car
>have a job but no money
>mom has no job
>sister and brother gotta look towards me for that shit
>no car
>mfw

I'm 22 and I still don't have my life together, because I don't know what I want to do. It pisses me off everyday. I've been heavily considering just abandoning all of it and living homeless for awhile. I'd kill myself but my girlfriend and my siblings would be devastated. That one thought alone is enough to make me lower the knife but I'm so selfish that I keep the knife in my hand.

shit user sounds bad. waiting for part 2

Sadly, I think that finally suicide will be only solution.

At least you have a girl friend. A lot of people here are in the same if not worse position, and they have no one, some of them even being abandoned by their families. You can crawl out of it man, just keep trying! Find some better job, find a second job maybe, try saving some money, etc! World is your oyster!

-Summer, 2009-
>Many friends yet so empty inside.
>I just wanted to get all of this outside my chest. and say goodbye to her...
Fast forward one year.
>Acted cool for the first months.
>But couldn't take it anymore.
>Had some kind of panic attack in class.
>''Lol, he's mad''.
>Alone again.
>Well, not really again.
>Some romantic relationship with some old friend. I was straight but I needed some love and it doesn't matter where it comes from when you're desperate.
>I lied to him.
>Told him everything was OK but I wasn't really sure about my sexuality.
>Broke up with him because I didn't want to spoil his life.
>He really wanted to help me.
>Told him I'd take care of myself.
>Saturday night crying my numb heart out for some stranger at Sup Forums. Obviously failed.
Lo siento, Álvaro, lo siento Natalia. Tenéis un gran futuro por delante y lo mejor es tener a la gente como yo bien lejos.
-6-18-2016-
>Got in contact with her again, after 7 years.
>She doesn't even remember me.
>She's the one I've lost my heart for.
>She doesn't even remember me.
>Kill me.

Done.

>be me
>19 yr old guy
>highschool just ended and mandatory military service will begin in 2 weeks
>this will be the last summer I can spend with my friends before all of us separate and go on a different
>tfw when I can't afford beer to party with them

If any of you guys are rich any amount is appreciated

BTC address, remember to remove spaces

1EpVFPQGL Phapp1phDRPdx mF21CucUtz35

Guys, I have no sob story. I am just a depressed loser desperate to find a place where I fit in.

Like many of us Sup Forumsrother

Tell her that this has to be her wake up call. You will still be her friend if she stops acting like that, not snapping or threatening to kill herself and shit. One strike. If she falters then you are out forever, now she is warned and she will only have herself to blame if she fucks up.

BRING ON THE BANHAMMER!!! (sucks for you really, but you'll get over her, you are still young, and i assume in school so you'll meet plenty of other people while studying.)

guess i'm gonna tell my history

>be me, 16
>totally a 6/10, quite fat but pretty funny
>English school meet a girl
>14,blonde, not tall,seems to have a lot of money
>she came and sits right next to me
>panic,hands are sweating,
>palms are sweaty
>After 20 minutes she talks to me
>she says "Hey, you know how to make exercise 2?
> say "sure, let me help you"
>she thanks me and say if we can change phone numbers
>First fucking time some pretty girl tell me this
>we do it
>Later that night se sends me a message
>Start to talk all the night
>She is so nice
>So funny
>so.. me

>started dating out
>she was everything i needed, and everything i was looking for
>9 months of relation
>people could'nt believe how a pretty blond girl 9/10 was dating a boy like me
> everytime i went to her house to go out, i buyed her a Milka chocolate, her favourite
> we lost our virginity each other, lifeisgood.png
>one day we where laying on the couch
>her dad comes in
>not a bad guy, she asks her if they could talk together
>she looks at me and say
>Hum user, can you leave? i have to speak to my dad.
>Ok, not a problem
>2 hours later she calls me
>"user there's something i need to tell you"
>fuck
>"I'm moving.."
>Please no.

I try not to feel. But this relate so much with the reason i started to stop feeling. God it hurts. "I have a boyfriend" maybe you should have said it before we're so close that you have to choose between him or me. Bitch.

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>
>At least you have a girl friend. A lot of people here are in the same if not worse position, and they have no one, some of them even being abandoned by their families. You can crawl out of it man, just keep trying! Find some better job, find a second job maybe, try saving some money, etc! World is your oyster!
user isn't wrong at least you felt what love was. For me I've been used by everyone. My ex, family and siblings. They made me feel fucking stupid for even trying to help. I mean I did but.... Why can I help everyone except myself? Why should I be the one feeling worthless and nothing but a burden? I tried to get out of this rut but everytime the end result was me feeling lower.... The best we can do is take it one day at a time. If you're ready to die you're ready to live. If you would give everything up and die why not give everything up and go outside. Travel, do what the fuck makes you happy. In life we have no purpose except to leave a mark or be remembered

Is true but well thing is I came to this country and school just this year, and now first year of gymnasium (high school) is a new school so I will have to meet new people and it increases my chances of finding someone, but I find it quite hard to get to know girls, she was one I could talk to so easily...

Also, how can mods prove I am really underage?
>The stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood.
>Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.

>Many friends yet so empty.
>Began writing.
>Just wanted to tell her goodbye...
Fast forward one year
>Acted cool the first months.
>Had some kind of panic attack in class.
>''Look, he's mad, haha''
>Alone again.
>Well, not really again.
>Had a short relationship with an old friend of mine. I was straight though but when you're desperate, you don't really care. Just wanted some love.
>Lied to him, told him there was no other I wanted to be with. Told him everything was okay.
>Didn't want to spoil his life, so I left him.
>Told him I felt insecure about my own sexuality and prefered to stay friends.
>I promised to him I'd take care of myself.
Saturday (06-18-2016) night crying my numb heart out for some user in Sup Forums.
>I guess I lied there too.
Lo siento Álvaro, lo siento Natalia. Tenéis un gran futuro por delante y lo mejor es tener a gente como yo bien lejos.

>Mad at her, her family, every single one of them
>she was leaving in 3 days
>Didnt talk to her on those days
>The day has come
>she already left the city
>Got a new message
>"user, i'm so sorry you're angry at me, as soon i got there i'll call you on skype"
>"I love you, please dont be mad at me"

>But she never got to get there
>Car accident
>All dead
>mfw i could have spent those 3 days with her
>mfw i'm still waiting for her skype call

I love you Delfina.

(06-19-2016)
>Made contact with her again after 7 years.
>She doesn't remember me.
>She is the one I ruined my life for.
>She doesn't even remember me.
Kill me.

*Hug*
You won't wait alone, user.

¿Por qué no se lo recuerdas, user? ¿Por qué después de todo este tiempo no te arriesgas y le dices la verdad a Natalia?

You said you were underage, i don't have the pic but "i'm one second away from being 18" (USER HAS BEEN BANNED) yadda yadda yadda...
Did you move to Germany? But even if you have a hard time talking to girls (i've been there), just befriend guys, some of them will be bound to have some female friends. You will start to hang out with them thanks to the guys, talk your way slowly to confidence, and then you are golden. Just remember to ASK, because otherwise you will miss some great times. I learned years later that i had several chance to not only have a gf, but lose my v-card waaaay before i was 22 if i had payed attention to people feelings and action in highschool. This is the easiest time to meet people, use it wisely Sup Forumsro (or you little fucker, i envy you...)

>be me
>go to youtube
>fags everwhere
>beseitegen.reich
>proceed to kill myself

¿Vale la pena? Yo no signifiqué nada para ella y en realidad, eso me alivia. Eso de estar seguro de que no sufrió por mí, ya sabes.
Prefiero no hacerle daño contándole esto. No sé ni por qué os lo cuento a vosotros.
Muchas gracias, user.

this hit way too close to home..

anyone posted Julie? good read

Have you got Charlotte? I remember it did hit me hard.

¿Que si vale la pena? Tu mismo has dicho que has arruinado tu vida por ella.
¿Qué más tienes por perder? Quizás no significó nada para ella en ese entonces,porque no intentaste nada con ella.
Venga, hazlo por mi