Retarded shit you did in middle school

retarded shit you did in middle school

Shot up the place.

/threat

kek

/treat

friends and i called a black girl a nigger and sent a dick pic(not ours), photoshopped pictures of the principles on gay porn over text. we got suspended for like 5 days each.

Masturbated in English class

Used to masturbate on the bus all the time

- Tripped this retard try-hard bitch who was an autistic straight A student, enev throughout highschool
- Stole money from retards everyday (literally those dumb cunts just left money lying around on their desks)
- Made these "Pen launchers" out of mechanical pens and sold them to kids for like $1 each
- Was a fucking delinquent w/ my friends in my french class 8th grade, made the teacher cry several times throughout the year
- Punched a retarded kid in the face in the locker room for locking me out of it after class
- got in trouble several times for flipping off teacher's to their faces

I'm sure I did other dumb shit, it slips my mind atm tho

Was a huge faggot in middle school was a compulsive liar and told a bunch of "This one time my cousin..." stories to try (and fail) to try to impress people who barley knew me

I sat with 3 kids in 7th grade. One told me what masturbation was, the second was obsessed with lesbian hentai and wouldn't shut up about it, and the third was a super-autistic Hispanic girl.

Strangled a kid in front of my class for stealing my backpack

do you currently go to farmingdale high school?
dont worry, no names involved

Drew a dick on my forehead

/tret

>Took a shit in the restroom
>toilet was a urinal
>no one found out who did it
>itsasecret.jpg

Tried to preach Marxism.
I got in an hour long argument with my math teacher about Marxism.
It was entirely futile.
I ought to have shot the damn tool of the bourgeoisie.

Watched the young turks

Checked

Yes I do

what's this middle school thing
like what age range are we talking about

decided against suicide

I threw a pipe bomb at a bus and seriously injured 6 kids. They thought it was 9/11 related because it was the next day.

Not caught.

threw chocolate pudding on the urinals so everyone would think they were pooped on and no one would use them.
Teachers eventually found out but it was fun

...

cock block myself over and over and just realize it years too late.

No

im male and 16,
what about you

Satan trips

we were really edgy and retarded and we almost got sued which my family couldn't have afforded.

I almost went down a path that would have led me to being a furry.
Then I discovered this place, and I was saved.
Yiff in hell furfags, you tried but you failed.

go to bed, kiddo

One time I took a shit and threw it in the cafeteria trashcan

Asdf

finals are over.

Me and my buddy Austin used to skip the last fifteen minutes of track to flip turds out of the toilet and scatter them about the floor

Me and my friends almost got suspended for rapping My Name Is at lunch.

>be me
>be chubby 11 year old in 6th grade
>placed in regular classes due to administration screw-up
>regular math class
>test day
>not allowed to leave class during test
>bladder at 110%
>cont?

well, have a nice evening you shitposting gaylord

One day, I hid my 1995 CR85 in the treeline. The last gym class of my 8th grade, we just did cross-country around the football field. I ran to the point where my bike was, and did a full lap around the football field in 3rd gear and then back home.

I laugh my ass off to this day.

Pic related, the bike the day before I sold it for another bike.

used to jack off a friend in the restroom lmao
good ol days

I'm 12 and girl

Nigga, akways continue a greentext.

totally

>>cont?
if you feel you have to ask after 2 lines just get out of here

the legacy of the pooping bandit lives on

i used to chew up loose leaf paper into giant sopping wet wads and throw them at the chalkboard when the teacher was writing on it

fuck me

Im serious!!!!!

Jacked it in he Bathroom
I did it in highschool too and I am pretty sure someone saw me when I did it in Highschool....... Fuck why did I remember this shit....

fbi guy not this time, i though you were someone in my grade. kek

WOOWOW REALLLY!????sure buddy

BWWAAAAHHAHAAHAHAHA

3/10 B8

I got my first smartphone in 9th grade and cracked the screen on my first school day of using it.

stole the personal dairy of a girl and read it out loud to many people including her crush, as written in the dairy.

>really need to pee
>literally squirming in my seat
>too much of a beta to get up and leave or ask teacher
>mfw I peed I peed my pants in class
>wait until end of test in puddle of my own urine
> get up and attempt to use brown paper towels to casually wipe it up.
>leave and go to the office
Cont.

/trot

>be me
>at school dance
>hammer time comes on
>do the fucking dance
>literally the whole fucking dance

I still cringe to this day

...

11-14 in us

I was a good little boy, not really.

We seemed like such good kids, my buddies and I. A's and B's. So we always got away with shit. Would make really loud sex noises when the teacher wasn't looking, with my friends. She never found out who it was, thinking it was other kids.

I had a bad invader zim phase

beat up this poor kid that had family issues

/tot

Fucked all of my female teachers in 6th grade.

i had family issues and got beaten up by someone

told a girl I was going to kill myself and then asked her our. Fucking hell I was such a faggot

Used to fake seizures all the time in middle school. Only a small handful of people knew i was only doing it for keks while everyone thought i was epileptic. Once faked a seizure after lunch was over in the middle of the school field. One girl was screaming for help and a counselor came over to assist. That's when i got up and made a run for it.

hello mr gopnik

I am in your grade you underage faggot

that's pretty cool
wish I could dance

I was a hardcore ponyfag
I thought Michael Jackson was the best thing ever
I mentioned Michael Jackson in every sentence

was an edgy wiccan. Fuck wicca

I apparently punched a kid in kindergarten, but have no memory of it. I got sent to the principle's office and was so oblivious that I 'confessed' just to get out of there. The kid was a troublemaker anyway so he was probably lying.

hey thanks

/to

I used to glance at my teacher's chalkboard.

one time in boy scouts I tried to give another scout a foot massage in a tent to impress him so he'd think I'm a pretty cool guy. Didn't work, he told people I was gay when I wasn't

>get to office, still no one has acknowledged my piss-soaked pants
>attempt to wash pants in bathroom using powder soap and brown paper towels for 30 minutes
>thank god I wore navy blue instead of khaki
>finally ready to leave the bathroom
>open the door
>the school janitor, Haitian Larry, is standing there
>looks at my pants
>smiles
>mfw the only person who knew I peed my pants in school was the Haitian janitor that couldn't speak English

>prove it
who is andrew fermes

Bruh!!! Fuck that noise. That shit was cool back in the day!

>tfw wiccan but not edgy

/t

>qt writes her number in my yearbook
>never call her

/

>Be me, in middle school, 13
>Get bored in english, decide to go to bathroom
>get in stall and see clearly female feet next door
>I hear "hello?"
>ohshititsagirl.jpg
>'umm why are you in the dudes bathroom'
>her friends pranked her
>i finish my piss and open the door
>Shes just sitting there
>she asks if i want a reward
>autistic shit fit ensues and ends in a yes
>she forces my face onto her genitals
>in about 10 seconds i hear "IM CUMMING"
>she begins to piss in my mouth
>i FLIP THE FUCK OUT and vomit all over
>Vomit is on her pussy
>i run out
This continues for a couple days and i become a school legend. More?



kekked

There was a kid in my 7th grade who was literally psychotic and would attack people with sharpened pencils at recess.

At the end of the year he also wrote peoples' death dates in their yearbook.

KYS

...

forged my dads signature because i didnt want him to see that i missed two homeworks.
they call him 2-3 days later. he finds out, avoid his car so i dont go home to get my ass beat. hang out with some asians, go to the park. Later in the night i agree for one of them to call my sister to tell them im at the school parking lot. get in the car, silence. Get home, dad kicks me and slams me on the floor a few times. gives me a purposely bad hair cut, depressed at school becuase everyone was making fun of me for it.

Moral of the story is to not run away from home.

I licked a garbage can for a half eaten cone of ice cream

Is your name Gabe

This is good

>gives me a purposely bad hair cut
fuck my mom did that too i can't even remember why
she said like
>that will teach you humility
didn't work

i took my dick out in kindergarten, still remember it too.

no, but i know gabe, tristan, david, and the like

I can't imagine being raised with beating. I mean I guess I would be used to it since that would be my reality, but it's not so the prospect scares me.

that sucks man. wasnt me though. kid I put boots to went military, got out and lost control of his vehicle one night. hes gone

yea, it really doesn't because i spent most of my time trying to mask it the best that i could.