What is the most creative and weird way you have pleasured yourself?

What is the most creative and weird way you have pleasured yourself?

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Does this work....because I'm down to try

what could go wrong

I don't understand the vacuum. I got a fucking dyson and I can't even feel a bit of a pleasure

It can feel alright

I made one of those condom sextoys (i'm sure someone has the webm)

shove a carrot in your ass

the showerhose on my balls while I jerk it in the shower. That's a classic!

got myself a girlfriend and told her i loved her

I used to go out to my dad's horseshoe pit and jerk off into the sand. I used to try to slip the spike up my ass but it would just touch my asshole a little bit. I would put some slight weight on in and cum into the sand pit.

I like sometimes a suction cup on my pussy.

550 cord wrapped around my dick
other end around my foot with enough slack that I could walk around but if I tapped my toe it would tug on my dick
did this in high school
came in so many classes surrounded by people
I went full on degenerate after that

Taped some bubble wrap around in a circle. Was aight

That's going to rip your dick off.
youtube.com/watch?v=m1AjfO4rArk

That's interesting.

This sounds pretty good. I think that would work for me.

I do this too ;)

I'm a cut fag so I have no idea what mechanics would be changed to make it work for uncut
you made me realize that

Using one of these on my dick

oh fuck son you just reminded me of this fapping method
I'd use a similar toy, it was a ball instead of a tube.
add some water to it and create a pussy, best cheap fap toy ever
i'd blow huge loads into it

HA, you just need to get the correct dicksucking vacuum then.

I cut the end off of the toy.
Then I basically use this method, except the toy is the fleshlight sleeve instead of a condom or glove.
Lube up and you basically have a ribbed fleshlight.

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I'd fold it and create a cleavage and fuck the gash I created

I found that method inferior to just cutting a hole and then flipping it inside out for the texture. Trying to fuck anything balloon-like filled with air or water is hard to do. Though, I haven't done the traditional prison blown-up glove fifi yet.

thought he was fucking a bristle worm

>Rubber glove
>fill it with lube, coconut oil, whatever
>Roll it up in a heating pad turned on high
>Wait for it to warm up
>fuck the rolled up glove

Honestly feels similar to a real vagina. In jail they do this but roll up a towel and it is called a fifi. I call this a hot fifi

I fucked a couch

a heating pad, that's brilliant

Oh wow I need to try that... If only I had a cup big enough ;)

Fuck a woman?

lmfao hot fifi

This is self pleasure.

What are some good drugs to take to make things better?

This actually work?

This

no dude I'd fuck the side with the frills
also I'd pull on the sides to control tightness

take lecithin, argentine or whatever, zinc for a few days. smoke weed the day of ejaculation and bear witness

Get a can and sponges, soak sponges in warm water, put sponges in can, make sure it's kind of tight around dick, put glove in and use lube or lotion.

A banana peel microwaved for 10 seconds. The less ripe the better.

Best part is having a banana to eat after you're done jacking off.

dick is too thick for the banana

same here. not pleasurable and messy as fuck

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>2016
>Not having 3 inch tall cups

No it creates mustard gas

Boy am I sure glad this thread is still up because I have a fucking review for you.

I tried vac hose plus dick.

It sucks

First of all I can't even fit my dick in the hole. Only part of the tip got in. Then it gets stuck and I literally don't feel shit. So I pull it out just enough so it creates like that stuttering noise on my tip to see if that works. Basically acts like a vibrater on my tip for a bit. It feels ok but not really worth. After about a few minutes I took my dick out, turned off the vacuum and just gave myself a good old fashion hand job like the Lord intended.

So basically that shit sucks literally and figuratively. It's terrible and getting anyone off and is a poor man's vibrator.

Never again/10

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Thanks for the review man o/

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I put a shock in my dick then fuck a sleepbag, thats the way i masturbate

Stimulate g spot for the best time

underrated

Better yet get a prostate massager.