How do I get laid at a cuban resort?

How do I get laid at a cuban resort?

Rape

Ask castro if he wants to bang

go out. have a few drinks, loose your self and just focus on fun, the universe will throw some pussy at you

honestly its that easy jesus go out a do some titty shots, why are people asking how to get laid at a resort, girls on vacation are the easiest to sleep with

>Open your wallet next to a hot bitch at a bar
> buy her a drink
>???
>profit

>just go up to a random girl and say "wanna do a titty shot?"
wat

That's not getting laid fagget thats fucking for money

The fuck is a titty shot and how do I ask without getting slapped?

Be charming, good looking or have money to burn.

I can't buy girls drinks at an all inclusive. Or should I go: "hey, can I buy you a complementary drink!" Then lightly laugh

don't use the word "complementary" but do go with the free drink joke, should get a mild giggle

check'd

dont say "can i" say let me buy you a drink. be assertive :)

step one: purchase a knife (a particularly threatening one)
step two: wait in the hallway next to your room (while holding knife)
step three: wait for a girl to walk by
....
> you know the rest

pull out your (U.S best) passport yell "Visa, Visa Visa.... chupame la pingaaa"

I don't drink or club

I'd love to tell you to be outgoing and confident in yourself, but since you're on Sup Forums, I'm afraid you're gonna aspy the fuck out and end up laying on top of her on the floor next to the bar stools, so I'll just say that you should smile plenty.

I only go on Sup Forums when I'm shitting, so I should not be too aspy

>"complementary"

Oh okay, sweet.

Make sure you smile plenty, but keep it in check. You don't want to look like a four year old taking a family photo.

Like I said, be confident. Don't be the guy that apologizes for every little thing or does stuff along those lines. Some people throw the word sorry into everything
(i.e. "Haha yeah, sorry. So what's your name? -sips drink- Sorry haha. Yeah, so where are you from? We don't have girls like you where I'm from, haha sorry.)

I don't know how you're getting onto this Cuban resort, but dress like you wanna get laid if you're at a bar. By that, I mean don't bring a scarf and all that crap. Follow whatever the dress code is and rock your shit, you're in it to win it, bro.

pic related: All the other idiots at the resort who were too afraid to talk to that chick.
(Last word of advice: You never hear someone say "Damn I wish I never flirted with that chick at that Cuba resort.")

Here's the thing: there isn't a single girl on that entire island that will fuck an obvious tourist for free. That isn't because they hate foreigners or anything. But every Cuban girl knows that if they ask for a little money on the way home, they will probably get it. However, while there are very few girls that will fuck for free, there are also very few girls in Cuba that you can't fuck for a certain price. That includes married women, teenagers, gilfs, whatever sick shit you're into you can find a way to buy it for a night. It's truly a 4th world country.

My recommendation? If you don't want any hassle I would simply sit at a table in your hotel lobby by yourself in a nice suit and have a drink (this only works if you are staying somewhere with a reputation for housing rich tourists like Hotel Nacional or something.) Typically you can smoke inside so you could even have a nice cigar while you're at it. If you're sitting alone and look rich, 99% of the time an extremely attractive escort will sit down at your table and strike up a conversation. Eventually, she'll ask about a private massage in your room or some shit. As long as you exercise some common sense and avoid getting drugged or robbed you should be fine.

I HIGHLY doubt you're going to have any luck getting free pussy in Cuba. For foreigners, it's pretty rare. However, once you give up on that, Cuba has some of the highest quality women for hire in the world (it's also stupidly cheap thanks to Cuba being a communist shithole.)

Oh fuck you I won't say that word jeez I didn't think it was that autistic

seriously go dancing with any girl and get her to grind on you so you get a boner. everytime this has happened to me at a club, the girl will tease me throughout dancing until we both want to do it and just fucking fuck.

No be autistic. Spit and stutter. Their motherly instincts will kick in and they'll want to care fore you

Source: have traveled to Cuba many times for leisure and done exactly this.

Good to know, cheers. I feel like I'll probably go after other tourists at the resort tbh tho

Thanks Sup Forumsro

Well then I suppose it's just like picking up girls anywhere in the world and I don't understand the purpose of this thread... It's kinda like saying "how do I pick up girls in calculus class?" Same way you pick up girls in any class, you stop being a fag and talk to em.

most of them will be drunk anyways, it's not like they would think that it's weird

Well I was curious about both. Idk if I have to pay....not sure how I feel about hookers homes