Hey assholes

Hey assholes,

So I'm an aspiring criminal, and I found something interesting while gutting a house I was monitoring for just that very reason: I found an application for a social security card with the SS# of every person living at the house... I have three social security numbers! Problem is, I don't know anybody that knows what to do with them and how exactly to do it (at least, not anyone that I want knowing that I have these numbers lest they steal them from me and use them first). And so I come before you, great and wise Sup Forums council, asking for your guidance. How do I ruin this family's credit into the next generation and capitalize enough to retire in Nicaragua before I hit 30? Also, nothing is stopping me from wiring you a kickback, if you've got the answers I need.

Thanks fuckers!

Also, feet, for those with an obtuse sexual palette like myself.

Sounds illegal

*gasp* It is! Oooh, this is just like Goodfellas!!!

Forgot to post lady feet :3

breaking the law is bad, M'kay

Yeah, but making money is good, right? That's the American Dream after all: get rich or kill trying.

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Open a bunch of credit card accounts in their names and gut hem, but gold with the cards and cash out

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Piss off, you pussy discharge of nigger dick pussy! I'm posting the lady feet, you're posting a Pandora's box worth of ways I can make money with someone else's identity, get it right!

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the op can only bump their own thread a certain number of times before their posts no longer bump the thread and only contribute to the post count but if you wanna solobump and have the thread die faster that's okay too

Just open credit accounts online [don't use your own wifi/internet] and when ever you use the card, either in person or on the internet, cover your ass.

I have no clue how you could use those in 'murrica cos im a eurofag..
In here it would be easy as fuck yo to get some profit but only if planned and timed correctly.
Dont do crime nigga, i have 5 years waiting me (realisticly 2-2.5 years thanks to winlands laws and "first timer" rule)
Best you can do is get someone to do the dirtywork for you by giving that sad fuck a small cut from the assumed profits.
This way id it goes south you can deny any accusations and continue living happily

Oh, you're still here? Sorry, I was busy counting my doucats from breaking into fucking houses. Why don't you grow a pair and abscond from what you're told every day, you waste-of-space automaton

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Most stores will require an id when using a credit card for any major purchase. The best you'll get is buying some Doritos at the gas station. Even then, they will be notified within hours of any bizarre transaction history, shutting down the card and opening a criminal investigation... where you are on camera everywhere you used the card.

TL;DR get a fucking job. Or enjoy a tiny room you can't leave while listening to niggers scream all day.

That's what I was thinking. There's a horde of homeless junkies in the city by where I live, I've gotten them to pawn stolen shit for me, return it to stores so I could do the gift card shuffle, I was thinking that I utilize them to open a PO Box, so that I can order unlimited shit with a credit card under this doofus' name and they go pick it all up in case a mob of cops is waiting at the post office one day.

na post more feet

Fuck your fat wife again and spit out another below average kid, you run-in-the-mill tax paying happy voting fat cat piece of zoo creature shit. I bet I make more before noon than you make in an entire pay period. I'll bet your car payment's overdue, shitbag.

I make six figures, how's risking prison to make $100 for an HDTV working out for ya?
I think your mother would be more impressed if you could throw in a few more ineffective vulgarities next time, boy.
>I'm sure you're a great thief when u ask literal children how to use a s.s. #.

Please, dude, please... you do not make 6 figures and use Sup Forums at 1 am on weekdays. Post a paystub and I'll post my driver's license (my REAL driver's license) as well as a selfie of me holding a sizeable amount of what is either atypically sized sea salt or crystal meth. Check, bitch.

Oops, here's feet.

I run three porn sites. I work when I want/if I want. I don't get a paycheck fucktard, it's called a bank account. Sure, I'll get right on posting that for ya...

So, idk about that guy, but I do make 6 figures and am posting at 1am on a weekday. Pic related.

So yeah, let's see that meth selfie. Also, nice feet. You've got good taste

I can't wait until op breaks into a house and gets a shotgun blast to the face. Get rekt homie.

>Check, bitch.
checkmate?

Only a matter of time. Retarded thieves all think the same... it's so easy! Why doesn't everyone do this? Then six months later the luck streak runs out and they're either dead or in prison. Always.

>be OP
>be a loser who has no money and steals
>be laughed at by everyone

physician here, i make 6 figures and use Sup Forums at 1 am on weekdays. just because you're a piece of shit and a disappointment to your parents doesn't mean everyone else wants to be. kill yourself before the police does it, nigger

screen shot and sent to cops. prepare your anus faggot.

KEK

OP gets shit on so hard he flees his own thread.
>Enjoy that metallic click you hear behind you during one of your exploits OP... it'll be the last thing you hear.

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MOAR
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