ITT we are hostages

ITT we are hostages

ill suck your dick if you shoot op for me.

Don't worry guys, I'll take this guy out with my super secret ninja military ancient Chinese hand-to-hand combat methods I taught myself online

Ill let you fuck my hand if you let me go (i pack a secret dildo for this exact situation)

Oh boy I hope he shoots me

if you shoot me ill shit my pants but if you dont ill cum on your shoes

How big's your dick?

Hey, at least we can have some fun, come on, blame the Islam for this, I will even let you kill me in the name of Allah

Hey, Mr. Hostage taker faggot. Let's get this show on the road, I'm fucking bored.

hope you don't plan on exchanging me for money because you aint gon' get shit

U-uh m-m-mister? I r-r-really n-n-need to use the bathroom...

...

I stand up, pull out the glock I've been hiding, and start shooting you guys. Just as our captors realize what's going on, I put one through my brain. PEACE OUT, FAGGOTS!!!

E-excuse me, b-but I r-r-really n-n-need to go...

so your plan is to take me hostage, eh?
i think your plan will fail
>unsheathes sword
hehe

execute order 404.

Well congratulations, you got
yourselves caught. What's the next
step of your master plan?

[ Secretly pulls out cell phone and quickly speed dials (818) 389-0012 for help.]

If dubs you succesfully grab gun from kidnapper and bang that woman in front of her husband. The people all give you money and you become the ruler of a country.

If singlets the bomb you had in your backpack that you forgot to take out yesterday, will detonate. Low and behold the kidnapper survives and makes sweet love to your mother.

If anything else, you have to put a sharpie in pooper everyday for the rest of your life

>I'm the cook

Not sure what your plan was when you took hostages at a gay bar, but like this bar, your plan is gay as fuck.

O-o-ohhh -- shiiiii -- ahhhh.... Goddammit...

if you kill us your gay

CRASHING THIS PLANE

...

>tfw i was planning to please Allah and suicide bomb the shit out of this motherfucking place.

made this in 5 mins hop you fags like it

Fuck yeh cunt
Have you considered a career in art?

jeez whats taking so long

stab guy in the dick with my fountain pen and try to wrestle his gun out of him

my life is miserable, might as well die fighting and go to valhalla

Since we're tied up back to back is it technically gay to fap? Its not like guy leaning on my back will see it.

If you kill me, I have allready won.

that's what i always say. never take it lying down

yeh

NYPA fagget

nobody? fair enough, I'll try to keep it down.

...

that picture fucked up any plans i had of sleeping tonight.

...

Please don't tie me up, that's kind of my thing and I don't wanna be half chub for this whole ordeal

Spidey!! Save us from the gunmen!! We're Hostages!!

...

...

Please let me go I swear I will suck your fucking cock.

>faggotry
go kill yourself, faggot.

>sage
this thread is cancer. you are all cancer.

DO IT FAGGOT.

oh hey cool gun! is that an ak47? i got 2 wings at csgo can i look?

I think its a saiga12, leave him alone man, you´ll get us all in trouble.

Was capturing me part of your plan?

Are you a hot female??

no but are you m'lady

Hanz! Boobie! I'm your white knight.