Hi guys

Hi guys.
Do any of you have experience with taking a shit while in bed? Just so that you don't have to get up and go all the way to the bathroom. If anyone have handy tips or practical advice that would be great. I'm sure there's an easy way to go about it with a plastic bag or something I just haven't found it. Maybe there is a great vacuum cleaner technique?

The trick is to shoot enough heroin so that the urge goes away.

Well, I need to take a shit right now and I don't have any heroin. I am however on bed.

Do you have a pillowcase? Shit in that, wipe your ass with it, and fling it towards the bathroom.

Smart.. smart.

Save future you a mess, just walk to the bathroom.

That sounds messy. I'd like something a bit more classy. Anyone else have any advice?

Go to the toilette

no hey op do you know how that urinal works

...

you could try diapers, like the rest of the fucking babies

I bet you the squiggly pipes have nothing to do with the actual plumbing, and the real urine/water pipes go into the wall and out.

use a bottle like everyone else
fucking newfags

This is OP. I capitulated and I'm now in the bathroom. But I'm not giving up on my quest to find a way to do this without leaving the comfort of my bed.

it called a bed pan you dunce. cut a ass sized whole in mattress, place bucket underneath. I've been doing this for years trust me. Just get mother to change it every couple of days or it starts to give of the poo aroma.

You're welcome

Brown paper bags. I'm a disabled veteran and I refuse to use diapers. I'm not a baby. So because it's difficult for me to get to the bathroom I keep brown paper bags near by and a roll of t.p. When I'm done I light the bad on fire and throw it out my front window onto my lawn.

The bad burns and the shit gets absorbed into the ground when it rain. When the cops asked about it I blamed it on neighbor hood kids, and they haven't been back since.

$20 on amazon
got a Urinal for $10
best $30 I ever spent
I am lazy as fuck

I have my vacuum cleaner parked next to my bed. If I to take a shit during bedtime hours I let it carefully slide halfway out then start the vacuum cleaner and let it grab the little turds head before I quickly shoot the rest out. Easy and fast! The only problem is if I brought home a one night stand and the vacuum wakes them up. I have a cople ok awkward moments in the past doing that.

OK. You got me. Lol

Adult diapers. Duh.

Does it not attract flies and stuff? How often do you have to empty it?