Late night feels thread, Sup Forums. Post your poison here

Late night feels thread, Sup Forums. Post your poison here.

Other urls found in this thread:

youtube.com/watch?v=7woW7DmnR0E
twitter.com/NSFWRedditImage

The fact that I'm commenting on my own thread, haha.

So what's bothering you?

>Be me
>Get home from work & gym
>See that cleaning lady has finished cleaning the house and already left
>She is a sweet old lady that lives across the street who does it for basicly nothing
>Need to use the toilet, walk past my bed
>Cleaning lady made the bed and put 2 pillows on the bed instead of 1
>Memories of her coming over to sleep start flooding my mind
>Remember how happy I was in those moments, the anticipation, the feeling when she texts "I'm here", watching tv next to each other in bed, cuddling,spooning, the sex, falling asleep and waking up next to her
>Have to lock myself in the bathroom so I can calm down

Jesus fuck, it's been 2 years. When does this bullshit stop.
I don't feel like a human being anymore.

It never stops

Tramadol 2800mg Sertraline 2550mg

Is this enough to kill me? If not I have a length of rope somewhere I can use and rafters in my garage, or I could take a taxi to the nearest bridge, but I would like to avoid a public spectacle. I was thinking of cleaning my room (can't see the floor, rotten food, clothes everywhere), putting things of value into boxes, maybe write a note to my friend from college, taking my dog out for one last walk and then doing it.

COOL :D

That's what you get for falling in love with a cleaning lady

haha whoops realised that wasn't really smart, should've said 'ex gf' instead of 'her'

Been awhile
Bumping

You'll be totally brain damaged after this overdose of meds. Not dead at all but full retard.

...

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Guess I'm the only one posting

I'll dump some

www.mylifebelgrade.blogspot.com

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...

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i'm not one that is known for getting the feels almost instantly.

but that last bit of that final sentence.

>taking my dog out for one last walk


insert kys cancer

...

If anyone wanna share something I'm still here

me too

i knew someone was going to post that.

that was a good day.

...

This one gets me right in the ticker.

...

Only feels post that ever made me sob ^^

There are never enough of these threads and or varieties in them. I don't think I get more thoughtful from anything else on the Internet..

Sharing a story about how I wasted my teenage years chasing a girl I never got. Will keep it short
>Be 14
>Meet girl at school
>10/10 goth-ish, thick brown hair, petite, shy... just perfect
>We start hanging out casually until we kinda becomme beset friends, at least that's what she called me, her best friend
>I kept making moves on her but she didn't want love
>Sometimes we actually kissed and made out while drunk but never sex, touched one of her tits once tho
>Accept the friendzone but doesn't really care to much since she's the nicest and most caring person I ever met.
>One day she starts hanging with my best friend
>They go to prom together and before I know it they're together.


Cont. for bump

I dont even know how to start as I am a bit drunk.
Lets see.
>Be me year ago
>17 at the the time
>New school, wanna make a lot of friends and all that shit
>Manage to get some and even a best friend
>Motherfucker's almost like a brother to me
Well, then it all went to hell I guess
>Meet J
>Straight 11/10
>155 cm( thats like 5 feet 1 inch or So?), I love short girls
>Fell for her hard
>Not enough confidence to make any move at that time
Fast forward to last few days before Summer break
>Out with her and others drinking
>Get wasted
>Tell her I love her
>Somehow manage to get a kiss or two from her
>Next day
>Get "I am just not looking for relationship right now" etc from her
>Kinda fucks me up
>Get quite sad
>Spend the whole Summer playing vidya like a melancholic beta
School comes
>Thinking I got over her
>Nah
>It all come back as soon as I see her
>She doesnt want to talk to me even tho we were chatting in the Summer few times
> She gets closer to my best friend
>Get a bit pissed at him for that but manage to stay friends with her
>Go out with her and our mutual friends every now and then and keep getting mixed signals from her
>She keeps texting me when drunk, she wanted me to stay with her on the party when others were going home already etc
>Still love her
Then I fucked up again
>February 2016, month after my 18th birthday
>Out drinking with her and few others
>Get drunk once again
>Accidentaly spill that I still have feelings for her
>She gets upset
>Doesnt want to talk to me
>she gets even closer to my best friend
>At this point I wanted to break his face whenever I saw them together
From this point it has just been getting worse, this is what I know
>He stayed in her place along with few others after a party no one told me about
>He slept in her tent along with few others on a festival no one told me about again

I think she doesnt think of him other than as a friend but I am fucking paranoid almost and I still wanna beat the shit out of him

feel thread ? feel thread
>be me
>still alive

cont.

>About a year pass and she never really talks to me like we used to
>Still talk to me best friend aswell, but never about her
>We start going to parties together once we got older
>She and her boyfriend lives together now
>They party alot so they started hosting parties
>I go there and have a great time
>Both of them are super chill and it seems like their more friends than anything else
>I third wheel for a while but it's not really that bad since we're all pretty good friends
>Time passes and shit happens
>She starts comming to talk to me when she's drunk
>Finds out he's been abusing her
>Keeps doing this several times
>I really want to do soemthing about it but don't wanna be a whiteknight faggot
>Her step dad also abused her and her mother when I first met her
>fast forward some more and they have a break in the relationship
>She seems really into me now, but I can't do anything because I'm afraid that people will think I'm taking advantage of her

cont for bump

damn dude that sucks, does your friend know about your feelings for her?

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

feels... reminds me of some summer camp shit i never got over. not even after two year-long girlfriends and several flings.

Yeah and he always acts supportive but I have trust problems

OP here. Thought this thread had died. Love you Sup Forumsros

>Their "break" ends and they start dating again
>things are back to "normal"
>One day they break up
>She caught him cheating
>Once again she comes to me to vent out and cry
>We start hanging a bit again
>Growing older so we kinda drift away from each other since we go to different schools and such
>She moves really far away
>Don't talk anymore
>She lives in the big city and finds a new bf
>Pretty cool dude I went to the same school as him
>They stay together for about a year before they move together and still live together to this day
>She's no longer the one she was
>She no longer talks to me
>I stayed loyal to her hoping that one day we'l lbe together
>I stayed loyal for nothing
>I could have chased and dated other girls
>But I didn't, for her
>Now she's ok but I'm broken
>She only used me for her own good
>She would always post silly pictures of us together on facebook during my birthday and leave lovely messages
>I turned 21 this sunday and not a single word from her
>It's been 2 years since I heard from her and I miss her so much


Sorry about the shitty read, I didn't wanna write too much so I made it shorter

You're a Faggot

>tfw when ex wont stop screwing with your head
>tfw you're in a social group, but are the one always parred off
>tfw every time you try and get into shape you injury yourself
>tfw no money
>tfw ex/trust issues fucking up every attempt at a new relationship
>tfw grandpa, your idol growing up, is bedbound because of multiple strokes.
>tfw everyone thinks you're happy

I know all the stories just from their start and i haven't shed a tear once, don't wanna be an edgy kid but i haven't cried for years now, best i can do is tear up and after a few secs the tears get sucked back into the eyes.

I guess i have a story of my own, don't even know it counts for something.
>Be me, live with my mom cus parents divorced
>She dies when i'm 16
>Live alone in my apartment.
>Somehow ended up with a lot of friends
>Really hit it off with one dude, we both liked the same games, liked booze, liked outside even though we're gamers.
>we'd go meet eachother every time one of us stepped outside wether it be to go to the shop or just out of boredom, always kept company to eachother.
>Then the last year of school was comming to an end.
>He was on the edge of breaking up with his girlfriend
>Kept comming to my place like every other day to drink, then talk about her cus he's drunk
>finally they break up
>fuck his now ex-gf like 2 days after that and a few more times
>School ends and so fades our friendship, we went different ways
>kept in touch with his ex-gf for a while, then found her a bf and stopped talking to her and everyone else i knew from before

And now i'm alone.

>Be me
>Be late bloomer
>Be popular with girls in early teens
>Lots of girls comming onto me
>Have no game and no confidence
>Never get laid becuase my brain shuts down when girls try to fuck me
>Be older now
>Be confident and ready for sex
>No girls want me anymore

If he's really your best friend, you have nothing to worry about

21? Really dude? 21? The sex times are just starting for you. Fuck that chick, who gives a fuck about her. You act like you wasted your life on her, here is a tip from reality: your life is just beginning.

You need girls to get your self esteem back.

Here's what you do:

>go to 18 and over "club" with some bros

>find 18 yo flock of chicks *hint* 18 yo chicks are tight hot and easy

>flirt with the cutest one put your arm around her, tell her you can buy booze if her and her friends want to jam

>get booze, go back to the hotel room you guys bought earlier in the day

>make sure her friends are super wasted so they don't cunt block you, also so your bros can "rape" them

>start kissing that hot blonde group leader chick, then proceed to fuck her in front of everyone, bros cheering, chicks slapping your ass while you fuck this chick porno style.

>bros tell this story about you for years and cement your status as super alpha

Will this work to get your mind off the chick that ruined your life? It did for me user, it did for me.

>Go to pharmacy
>Have to drive for 1,5 hour to get there
>Arrive and and wait for line to open
>First line open after some old grumpy guy walks away
>9/10 qt3.14 behind desk
>Kinda looked like Mei from overwatch just not as thick
>Try to act cool and confident
>Remember that I have to take out antidepressants
>Want to turn away and wait for another line but already walking towards her
>Do like a haflway turn until I hear her say "hi"
>ohfug.jpg
>Turn back, says hi and give her ID
>She starts typing on the computer for almost a minute while I stand dead still
>Looks up at me and smiles as she asks me if it's the right meds
>"uuumm... yesh, probably yeah I think so"
>Get's me the meds and asks me to sign paper
>Can't even write my own fucking name and have to try over 3 times while she just stares and smiles at me, probably thinks I have autism
>Pay for the meds and do half walk half jog out of there
>Turn back head to say "goodbye"
>Almost run into a shelf
>Drive home
>I can't go back

OP here, I have a story of my own.

I have a girlfriend that I've been together with her for the last 6 months. I was very happy. I was. It's just that lately idk if I am anymore. She's got severe mental illnesses and idk if I can cope with having to deal with her problems on top of mine anymore. She's got more than one mental illness too. Even though we've only been together for 6 months, I've known her and have been helping her with her issues for the last 2 years.

Here's where it gets tricky. I've fucked up my education, and when that happens I've fucked up my entire future. Meanwhile, she's very successful with her education and is heading off to university next year. In 2020, she could go to New York with her education and I could go with her. Permanently. So it's either stay with this girl who's issues bring me down and also idk if I love her anymore just because she could actually give me that future or to break up with her and idk fucking kill myself.

Sorry if it was a little messy.

>Have to lock myself in the bathroom so I can calm down

What's the point of this i never understood. Does being in a small space calms you? The cold floor? What is it?

dump girl
save money
study
have a career.
your life>everyone else's life, get that into your head.

Actually made me tear up user. Can't really say much else. Hope it gets better for you. You should get over her eventually.

Why not go back dude, nobody really cares about those 'awkward' things you think you did, be confident

Gotta agree with , don't have to necessarily break up because of this, is there no school close to NY that's suitable for you? Also, 2020 is a loooong time from now.

I still live with my parents and sister, I didn't want them to see me breaking down.

Hehehehe

>Met the perfect girl and love of my life at 14
>Were together just over three years
>I fucked up real bad
>She broke up with me
>Was horrible, she din;t want to but had to because of what happened
>Nothing I could do about it
>Stayed friends through college
>She got a new bf
>I got a new gf
>Stopped talking
>It's been almost 5 years since we broke up
>3 since we last spoke
>Still in love with her
>Still think about her every day
>Love my current gf but it's just not the same
>Seems happy with her bf but upsets me every time I see pics of them together
>Have wanted to write her a letter ever since we broke up telling her that I still love her and always will but too scared to do it
>Feel dead inside
>Feel like I'll never be truly happy again
>All my fault
>Think about killing myself every day
>Don;t know what to do, miss her so much

Good plan, but it's unfortunately not so easy...

Read this while listening to song. Shed a tear

God. What a faggot.

Hate to say it you need to get over the girl. You dont seem to have ever had a chance. And it kinda sucks for your best friend if he wants to and could get with her, but cant because you were her orbiter and feel like you have some kind of claim to her.

That's harsh mate, wish you the best

would creencap if i wasnt drunk of my mind, keep it up user, it will be fine

>Started new high school in a smalltown out on the country
>Many old friends from elementary started some school and I still went in the same class as them
>Meet new people my around the same age as me
>Meet this girl
>Amazing girl
>Became one of the best friends I've ever had
>So super friendly and supportive
>Was invited to party at her house
>Let's my friends come aswell
>Meet more people
>Form a decent groups of friends
>Some older than others, some younger
>Boys and girl
>As time passes we become better and better friends
>Used to party every weekend together
>Spend time together at school, us who went to school at least
>Spendt summer vacations drinking at hanging at the lake
>No worries
>No bills to pay
>No rent to pay
>Careless
>Life was just a big party
>Best time of my life ever
>Lasted just about 3 years
>As we all got older we all started to drift away
>Some startet at other school and some started working
>Most of them got a bf/gf which they moved in with
>Almost everyone has moved from this town except me
>I see teenagers going through the same good times as I did
>I barely know any of my old friends anymore
>Be 20 now
>I try making new friends here but they never wanna hang out
>They even lie to me when I ask them if they wanna do something
>I'm at home playing vidya and work
>No motivation for college or university
>I still wanna party
>I miss the smell of cheap hairgel, perfume, beer and liqours
>I miss being hammered and puking while my friends are laughing at me
>I miss lying drunk on a roof and stargaze
>I miss having fun
>I miss not being alone
>Have to be a big man now
>Have to grow up now
>No more time to party
>No more friends
>No more fun

I feel that... Except I'm the situation you are now and I'm the age that you were when you were having those fun times with all your friends.

I long for people to do with me what they did with you at my age, I really do.

Growing up fucking sucks. I wish I believed people when they told me my school years would the best of my life, I would have savored every last fucking second.

yep, I hated school
I couldn't wait to grow up and start working and earning money

I miss school

...

I actually liked school until towards the end of secondary when I couldn't wait to leave. Now I would literally give anything to go back, I would gladly live my secondary school years on a loop forever, I had so much fun. Now everything is just shit.

bumping

I wish I was dead

The problem is that He said He wants nothing more than friendships netween them but if He lied, how do I know that He haven't been jeopardazing my attemps

It's gonna be fine,
Planned on killing myself the entire last week
A trick that helps is to just stop think about shit and just focus on whats going on at this very moment, just do something

And see a doctor, you'll get some meds

Been to see a doctor twice. First time the doctor told me to grow up, the second time they wrote me off the books because I didn't respond to a letter quick enough even though the letter saying that they're writing me off the books came at the exact same time as the letter warning me about it. British NHS is absolute horse shit. Doctors are worthless. Life is worthless.

Does anybody have the story of that french user dating an italian girl, 1st it's a LDR then she moves close for college, they get engaged and then he fucks up after around 3years?

Must have been a couple months ago or so

Legit question, what the fuck do you say to a doctor to get antidepressants? Just "I'm depressed sort me out Doc"? I've been scared to go to the doctors for years because I don't have a fucking clue what to say to them, I feel like they'll just laugh at me and tell me to get over it.

GF broke up with me about 2 months ago.

Told me she wasn't happy and that I was depressed. Kept trying to tell me it was all her and I didn't do anything wrong. I've since realized it was probably mostly me and she just wanted to sugar coat it for me.

So I've been working on me and I'm slowly making progress. Feels fucking good. There's always that little voice in the back of my head saying maybe she'll come back when I get my shit together but I'm feeling so much better about myself then I have in years that I'll be alright even if we don't.

Oh wow that sucks... At least try to go out with class, i always said that if i had to do it i would jump from a plane with a parachute but never open it so i could spend my last moment flying

Been depressed since I was 14
Abuse and bullying is what got me, and I know you've heard this before but; Everything will be okay.
Focus on whats going on right now, forget about the past, I know it sounds hard and it is.
Life has dealt me a shit hand and I keep getting shit hands, but the last couple of months have been pretty okay.
This last year I've fucked up and made some huge mistakes that have cost me a lot of time and effort but I moved on from that, try to keep looking forward.

Another thing that helps is to take the mask off, pretending to be happy will just make everything worse. Once you talk to someone and tell them how you feel and show them how you feel I can promise you that you will feel better

Felt the same way the first time I saw the doctor
Just tell him how you feel and that you want help, my doctor ran me throught a test which would determine how streong your depression is, if it's at a certain level pills will be an option, and therapy if you so wish.
But don't lie because you might up much worse then

Thanks Sup Forumsro.

A test as in just asking some questions? And are you British? I only ask because Britih doctors tend to be arseholes haha

Thanks though, I think I'll go when I move back home for a few weeks.

And another thing about the "stop looking at the past"
If you know about the city of sodom from genesis 19, when God burns the city and tells them to run and not look back, then Lot's wife looks back and turns to salt.
Kinda just a thing I thought about the other day.

Keep heading forwards and don't look at the horrors behind you

Not british, but my doctor is that kinda crazy outdoors man
"Screw medicines, go outside and everything will be okay" kinda guy
He doesn't even use meds himself unless it's something super serious

Tell them you don't feel happy, tell him you always have that burden and sadness inside of you that you can't get rid of.

Yeah I'll stop being a pussy and just go. Thanks man

Old story so I don't remember everything..
>Be me
>16 beta fag
>Sport ed with class
>Fag so i fall and hurt myself like an idiot
>Staright 10/10 comes to me and asks "Are you alright user?"
>Someoneactuallynoticedme.jpg
>Alpha mode engaged "Of course don't worry!"
>Try to stand up...can"t!
>"That looks bad let's go see the nurse user..."
>She helps me get up and we're off
>I feel like a total loser
>Don't rememeber well but we discuss alot she's crazy adorable and cool
>Waiting for nurse to come
>"user...do...do you have a gf"
>"...uhhh...no...."
>We look ourselves in the eyes...
>Our heads slowly comes together....
>I wake up....
Mfw

If only you knew,what "best friends" would be ready to do,whether for pussy or money.
You would be amazed.

A long time ago,i fell for my best friend's gf when they were together,they had been in a relationship for 2 years at the time,fast forward 2 months and i'm fucking her on the bed where they both had their first kiss when they were 14

Poor guy didn't even get to fuck her even after two years,i was her first.His words not hers.

Had the same kind of dream some days ago, it hurts I know

>Be me
>Last weekend
>On my way home from a party
>I the backseat of a car
>Cousin driving
>Sit right next a girl
>9/10 Aryan
>Went to middle and high school together
>Girl I turned down several times
>No idea why I turned her down
>She was crazy about me
>Asked me to prom in high school 5 years ago but I still turned her down
>Made out at a party once
>Anyway I'm a bit drunk
>She's probably a bit drunk aswell
>Still pretty awkward
>Smalltalk a bit
>Not much to talk about
>Silence
>Fuckit.jpg
>I ask her if she wanna hang out sometime?
>Looks at me, smiles and say "Like we used to back in the day"
>"Yes" I respond and smile back
>"I'd love to do something tomorrow" she says as she puts her hand on my thigh
>Feeling that teenage love feeling rushing back into me
>Feel super happy
>Feeling like maybe life isn't that bad after all
>I wake up

...

Dreams are the best thing in my life right now. But waking up from a good one is the worst.

I think we should all stop being such whimpy faggots.
Get out there and take your life back

youtube.com/watch?v=7woW7DmnR0E

Bye

tfw you remember old memories from the past and realized she actually wanted to be your gf but your autism was too big for you to understand..

Like this?

>tfw you remember old memories from the past and realized she actually never really loved you but your loneliness was too big for you to understand..

>be me 2 years old
>dad cheats on mom 23019840231 times, seperated
>never saw them kiss
>mom takes out frustration on me, young 21 year old doesnt know how to handle shit
>never beats me but blames everything on me, tells me i will kill her one day because of how i am
>get bullied in school and have no friends
>doc says i have adhd because bad marks n shit, dopes me up
>whole school finds out and they all call me names like drug addict and crackhead
>get to highschool
>still a loser, but some friends
>like girl, get confident, ask her out
>laughs, makes fun of me, tells school
>elementary all over again
>become the target of the alphas

cont.

shit, forgot this part
>dad leaves mom and becomes revolving door father, in and out for years apart

ok back to story

>alphas are mostly hood niggas, punk me every day
>break into my locker, throw food at me, yell names while im walking by
>one time got locked in the music room closet n beat with meter sticks cuz i wouldnt give up the 5 bucks i had to buy lunch
>dad was back in the country, finds out about what happened cuz school called my mom
>dad calls cops n charges the guys
>now im a snitching pussy
>finally find some 6/10 whore to date
>mom doesnt like it n sends me to brazil to live with dad n seperate me from whore

cont.

bumping for you

>get to brazil, 2 weeks in dad puts me in school
>scared shitless, social outcast + dont speak portuguese
>first day of class
>pantsmadeofspaghetti.jpg
>teacher announces im new to the country
>everyone stares
>descendintomyspaghettiform.png
>bell rings, break time
>everyone crowds around me
>people actually interested in me, want to be my friend
>girl talking to me, inviting me to hang out
>betas looking on in envy
>its my time now
>become king of town since it was small 10000 person town
>fuck pussy n shit, start doing drugs
>become friends with hot lesbians
>good cuz can fuck n no worries bout relationships
>introduce me to gay guy
>gay guy throws crazy parties n always invites me n gives me free drugs n shit
>get really fucked up one night

cont.

damn...

Hurry up OP

Faster user

>too fucked up on coke and alcohol to move but still conscious
>feel hand on my dick and tongue on my ear
>ohfuckyesfreepussy.webm
>turn head slightly
>gay guy is beside me
>WTF
>get up, fall down, stumble around and manage to leave, left all my shit there
>dont remember much but woke up by the river with my shirt off
>get home
>just going to pretend like nothing happened
>turns out people saw
>now im a faggot
>social life ruined again
>revert to beta form and lock myself in house for 2 weeks
>dad was nowhere to be found, grandma send me back
>i start letting out my emotions

cont.