/brit/

On the road edition

Other urls found in this thread:

youtube.com/watch?v=LfRNRymrv9k
youtube.com/watch?v=y7ocOKvfoZg
twitter.com/SFWRedditImages

ANIFUCKINGME

/cum/

first for poo

...

this

...

>some literally who swede tripfag

>You will never get under the Invisibility Cloak and have a wank on McGonagall's face while she sleeps
>You will never use the Marauders map to find people fucking and then use the Cloak to go in and watch and take pictures
>You will never use Polyjuice to turn into the prudest, sexiest bitch in the school, take nudes of yourself as her and blackmail her into being your fucktoy
>You will never use Polyjuice with all the lads and end up in a giant Hermione orgy, including cat-Hermione
>You will never use Polyjuice made with the hair of a horse to give yourself a horsecock and then fuck petrified students
>You will never spike the drinks in the girl's dorm with love potion and then watch them have a giant lesbian orgy and taking pictures of it while under your Cloak
>You will never then take some of the horse Polyjuice and reveal yourself to have them scramble over themselves to get a go on your horsecock
>You will never use Crucio during BDSM sex
>You will never use Gillyweed to get a really, really long underwater blowjob from a Mermaid
>You will never shove that knotty Elder Wand up Luna's snatch while Peeves wanks his ectoplasm on her face
>You will never give her the Resurrection Stone so all of her ancestors can watch his act of depravity in real time

where do you stand on this /brit/?

scandanavians are pussies

don't know who he is

don't care

Who

does august 22nd count as "late in the year"?

Just wondered what most punters preferred to do; let your old fun juice 'build up' over a few days before meeting a girl with the intention of getting to shoot off a more impressive cumshot on a hot body (or those rare gems; a hot face), or bashing one out so as to be able to last a little longer on a first pop?

Generally I've found that if I let it build up then I end up finishing way too early during a punt and as I tend to go for 30 minute bookings don't get the offer much for a second round. On the flip side I've had occasions when I've been wanting to shoot a full on splurge all over some immense breasts but just squirted out a tepid spew.

>go to store
>try to buy a new underwear
>find a nice coloury one
>ask the clerk if I could try them on
>he laughs and says no
>I think for a moment and decide to buy them
>spent ~36gbp on a single pair of boxer briefs
>go home
>try them on
>they're way too small, not even close to being a medium, maybe a chinese medium
>try to return them
>they don't accept returns for underwear

How is this fucking fair? I should be able to either try them on in advance or return them after. This is fucking infuriating.

suzy

>Scottish "people" can't go to the supermarket after 11pm or buy beer after 9pm

at least I'm on the chart

absolutely criminal prime carey never got her jugs out

youtube.com/watch?v=LfRNRymrv9k

5'10

Haribos are 50p per bag in poundland lads

where is the janitor today

>missing out on the latest memes
lads...............

i honestly have no idea how pound shops make money

need to spaff on that whatever it is she's putting in her mouth

in the mood for a /brit/ sandwich

that's not a pound

are you the 6'4 lad? I'm the 6'3 lad

How many are there?

...

Perfect height.

don't care about third world memes

yours are on par with /lat/

What's the highest frequency you can hear lads

youtube.com/watch?v=y7ocOKvfoZg

I stop hearing at about 14,800

local poundland was replaced by a sainsburys

somebody answer this question please

I am 6ft 3 and don't consider myself tall.

hey
i was doing just fine before i met you

boy I sure do love me some literal fucking slop to devour like the fat piggy I am

>ArsenalfanTV after the game tonight

post more you nonce
what's her full name?

Last one. Thank you for tolerating my "Journey of Food" today. Have a great week.

no

this looks like it's straight from a freezer. Obviously frozen garbage the crust isn' even crispy and the cheese is processed horse shit

>swedish thread is in swedish
>only swedes know swedish
>expect non-swedes to follow swede thread memes

hehe i knew exactly who he was thanks for the you

what does then?

>go to shop
>try to buy new pair of pants
>find a nice coloury one
>ask the clerk if I could try them on
>he laughs and says no
>I think for a moment and decide to buy them
>spent ~36gbp on a single pair of boxers
>go home
>try them on
>they're way too small, not even close to being a medium, maybe a chinese medium
>try to return them
>they don't accept returns for pants

How is this fucking fair? I should be able to either try them on in advance or return them after. This is fucking infuriating.

ever hear the story of the crabs that ate silicon chips?

made it to about 18000

off for the so called smoke sesh

i can still hear up to like 16,000

wtf I can't hear anything lad, when is the normal cut off for a 21 year old?

susan

8800

stopped being able to hear anything around 16,000

2 for a pound, pal

no but I'm all ears

also, good get

it's muted, you need to unmute it to hear anything

filled up my tires at a gas station a couple weeks ago and the thing didn't have a guage, it just wanted you to enter what your desired air pressure was and it'd supposedly beep when it's hit it. i never heard it beep so i just filled up my tired with equal amounts of time. i went to a different gas station today and on a whim decided to check my air pressure and two of them were at 65 when my tired only want 32

did they turn into PURRsonal computers lol?

Morrison's Chicken Korma & Pilau Rice: Bland as fuck.

>earlets

I would take one bite and HEEM the cook
t. pot sticker aficionado

How old? I stopped at 9000 but I'm 25

Is that Mozzarella? Jesus that's enough for about 5 pizzas

what does HEEM actually stand for?

when I turn my volume all the way up I can still slightly hear up to 18,000 almost

If the frequency is high enough it can't be muted

what's so cheeky about nandos?

Same

Hate it when I see a 6'4" guy and wish I could grow just a little bit more.

around 14000

30 years old

absolutely disgusting. a travesty of legitimately tasty chinese cooking

ffs lads have you seen this american ideal of travelling with your lover across the freeways past mountains and deserts from new york to los angeles on some life changing road trip wish we could do that here but it wouldn't be the same driving your lass along the m1 to wakefield

23

got very sharp hearing and eyesight

this runt at the store i was shopping at asked me if he could try on a pair of pants before buying them. i guess he thought i was a staff member just because i was wearing a polo shirt. i told him no just to fuck with him and his face just dropped and he bought them anyways. they looked way too small for his fat ass too, it was hilarious

crepe check?

27. sure your speakers arent just wank?

it's from a video, someone knocks a bloke out and the black bird filming goes HEEM (him) SLEEPY

please don't make me redundant

Hit Everyone Even Myself

left: janny
right: you

no I meant the Youtube video is muted

*makes you redundant*

I made it to around 18500 before my third eye closed, I'm 23

19500

have bad eyesight

I think that was the joke tbf

Even that wouldn't work if the frequency is high enough.

About 17,500 when I bump my volume up to 100. About 15,500 when I leave it down at 40%. I'm 22.

How high am I supposed to be able to hear?

getting seriously suspicious of all these wankers pretending to have mental health issues

16,600 is when i stop hearing it

I've driven from my town (just north of Toronto) down to florida wit a few mates before

was pretty sweet and we had a metric fuckton of weed with us as well
idk how we didn't get fucked at the border

What were you expecting? Korma is the blandest curry you can get. Go for a Rogan Josh next time.

Turned it down because I thought it might be a screamer, 15,000 on full volume, phew

100,000

Sometimes poms try it here with mixed results

>How high am I supposed to be able to hear?
About this high
*puts hand up at about shoulder level*

gave me an idea, thanks

Does sp still do the Sup Forums world cup?

>eating a turkey pot pie and watching house
>its a gross episode