Be Euro

>be Euro
>fall Asleep behind wheel
>wake up in different country

Other urls found in this thread:

youtube.com/watch?v=3kTeoO7IGjc
3news.co.nz/sport/video-highlights-australia-bowled-out-for-60-england-dominate-day-one-2015080706
livescience.com/56303-man-in-australia-gets-two-penis-spider-bites.html
twitter.com/SFWRedditVideos

>be Dutch
>clog toilet
>flood country

>be Australian
>have to use safety seatbelts to use the toilet

...

Surprisingly good banter

> be Australian
> wake up next to last nights score
> "oi cheers sis, that was a roight foine shag"
> check pantry for food
> get bitten by a spider
> "oi fuck, thats a cunt of a thing"
> get in truck to go to hospital
> won't start, abos stolen your petrol
> run for a day and a night to reach hospital
> hospital hasn't loaded, ping in the trillions
> pick up a pack of cigs, abos mug you in the street
Such is life

you'll get there little brother

don't you have abos in new zealand?
what are the native people of new zealand?

...

Maoris are bro tier

Maori. And none where I live, just whites thank god

maoris and they're based

...

>what are the native people of new zealand?

sheep

How exactly are they based?

Also, are there european indians? like, abos from europe?

>Be swedish
>Be swedish

...

>be german
>vote merkel

>be Australian
>fall asleep behind wheel
>wake up a thousand miles from civilisation with no food or water in sight

>be Pole
>clog toilet
>no worries because you're a plumber

maoris are based, they're rowdy fat fucks

> be British
> have Nigel farrage
> lay the ground works for the continuation of western civilisation
Thanks brother

>be Australian
>wake up a thousand miles from civilisation with no food or water in sight
Ftfy

...

>in britain, Boris Johnson is unironically considered to be a candidate to be the next conservative Prime Minister

they're like other natives except not quite as fucked

you forgot
>apply vegemite on the wound

>in australia, Tony Abott literally got fired from his job as Prime Minister for being too based

>in Britain, David Cameron believed that uneducated racist bitter older chavs would actually want to remain in the EU

shut the fuck up pierre

>be gay
>wake up
>anus is prolapsed again and you're HIV positive

>Be australian
>Don't even fall asleep behind the wheel
>Kangaroo fucking jumpkicks my windshield

youtube.com/watch?v=3kTeoO7IGjc

>be French
>surrender

>be korean
>have shaman for president

my dude

>be gay
>try hard to pretend you're a normal person but gay cultures secretly actually worships hiv and has several forums for getting in contact with hiv positive people and having their semen put in your ass
Really makes you think

>be Norwegian
>go to capital
>get bombed
>try to relax at summer camp
>get shot
>try to get to hospital by buss
>get stabbed

Every Korean hates the bitch. Both of them

>Be Swedish
>Do anything
>Get raped with impunity

>be swedish
>walk into no-go zones
>get raped
>police try to help but are chased off.
>ask for more

Do you have to partake in the gay culture if you're gay, tho?
I'm gay, and I'm still waiting for the right man.

i thought it was the finns who were stabby

Good on you.

>be dutch
>get flooded by muslims
>then actually get flooded

>

>be somalian
>grenade swedish police station

>Be brit
>Police take away all my cutlery because shit's dangerous
>Other than that they're not allowed to do jack shit to stop criminals

>I'm still waiting for the right man.
That sounds pretty fucking gay if you ask me.

>be canadian
>A FUCKING LEAF

But I'm gay

>Be australian
>download.jpg

>be french
>wake up and sniff armpits
>"honhonhon pas assez smelly je pense, c'est unacceptable honhonhon"
>rub crushed garlic all over yourself to rectify this
>bus drivers are on strike again, ride bicycle to work
>accidentally enter sharia zone
>shaved twirly, effeminate moustache yesterday so look like a little boy
>dutifully accept your government-mandated anal penetration
>apologise to muhammed, abdul and faisal for not enjoying it enough, promise to do better next time
>finally get to work
>clock in
>surrender hard for 45 minutes
>clock out
>go on strike for having to work 15 minutes longer than usual
>get blown up on the way home

BIG WOOLLY SHEEP

>be brit
>police survey twitter for thought criminals
>have university age kids that cry about democracy not working
>have a filthy 9m population capital next to a big polluted river

>be brazilian
>have widen anus circumference

>be australian
>wake up next to your sister
>"ay dahlin fahk moi that was a noice root last noight"
>ride a kangaroo to the shitposting plant
>get stopped by abos
>their faces haven't loaded yet because of high ping
>give them all your petrol anyway
>apologise for invading their country
>say thank you to the traditional owners of the land, the irrawajjialabumbajjiju people
>continue on your way
>shitpost hard on Sup Forums all day so you can afford to pay your internet bill ($1000 for 0.1bps connection, 3mb data cap)
>go home
>get mugged by abos again
>no petrol this time, give them some of your ping instead
>switch on the tv
>the wallabies lost to new zealand again
>"fahkin no worries m8 she'll be roight I'll just watch the loigue instead"
>the kangaroos lost to new zealand again
>"m-muh cricket"
>3news.co.nz/sport/video-highlights-australia-bowled-out-for-60-england-dominate-day-one-2015080706
>"m-muh afl"
>can't see what's happening, players' mullets blocking the camera
>go to new zealand, steal some pavlova and claim it was yours all along
>cry yourself to sleep muttering "m-muh hdi, m-muh gdp per capita"
>get bitten by spoidah
>die within seconds

...

>69557569
>be Euro truck
>fall Asleep behind wheel
>they blame you for terrorism

Had a good giggle

>be australian government
>destroy the nbn

BUT I'M VIRGIN

>be X
>do Y

>VIRGIN

How is that even possible in a country like Brasiu

>their faces haven't loaded yet because of high ping
>no petrol this time, give them some of your ping instead

Spat my sandwich

never reply to me again pierre you smelly faggot I hope you die in your sleep

>be french
>go to church get beheaded
>go to nice get TRUCCD

complete autism
i stopped trying, and decided that I might as well wait for the right person.

I wanted to write a good one but New Zealand has no culture to make fun of.

>be french
>spit your sandwich

Seriously, everyone beneath Texas fucks like rabbits.

>be leb
>hang in sverigetråden all day to complain about your weight

date down, go black

>be nonswede
>have to use lying fakenews to banter swedes

>be truck
>run over europeans

>be swede
>your own government hides the fact that swedes are getting cucked out of existence

Didn't know california was beneath texas

Nice trips

>Be Korean
>Baby manages to die of starvation in first world country

>be swedish
>belive the fake news myth

i heard germans are smelly too, can anyone confirm that?

nice digits
everyone except me

I have decided, unironically, that I want to lose my virginity to an european.

fakenews is newspeak

Savage

>be lebanese
>is lebanese

nice digits

Now that's actual banter

>be Murican
>lose at esports

>be new Zealand
>natives have their language stolen for a lego brand
I loved bionicle as a kid tb h

THE MEINSTREEM METEOR

>Implying esports matters to anyone who isn't a scrawny manlet beta

They aren't the norm outside your cunt

>be korean
>actually play esports unironically

Stay mad whitey

...

Starcraft isn't a sport like rowing, cycling or dressage

>tfw a high school teaches e-sport
>i pay tax money so kids can play games

t. One hairstyle one plastic surgery face people

wtf i hate lebanon now

...

>be kiwi
>wake up next to last night's woolly conquest
>open this morning's sheepshagger herald
>black caps are losing again
>"aw nu, m-muh all blecks!"
>do a stupid nignog dance
>can't go to work, company building got reclaimed by the local iwi
>go home
>get stopped by maoris
>get eaten

>be a kiwi
>fall asleep on the wheel
>parrots have eaten your car

>dressage
>sport

>A woman is in charge of your country

No wonder you have so much to prove

>a cheeto is soon in charge of your country

Fucking kek

>Be Australian
>Get bit on the benis twice

livescience.com/56303-man-in-australia-gets-two-penis-spider-bites.html

pls delet