It's my birthday b

Jack Rogers
Jack Rogers

it's my birthday b. dubs chooses the reason im calling sick into work today.

Benjamin Wilson
Benjamin Wilson

my mother died in her sleep last night

Jackson Robinson
Jackson Robinson

I have a cold.

Easton Ramirez
Easton Ramirez

Its that time of the month...

Jacob Perez
Jacob Perez

all because i didn't reply to this post

Ian Brown
Ian Brown

Kek this

Luke Perez
Luke Perez

Trips and you quit your job and go on a week long binge drinking spree.

Jeremiah Wilson
Jeremiah Wilson

"i quit"

Camden Perry
Camden Perry

i finally get laid today

John Flores
John Flores

Tell your boss you got your cock stuck in the toaster while you were making breakfast

Jeremiah Allen
Jeremiah Allen

Choked on some nigger dick last night. Must talk in raspy voice. Check um

Jason Peterson
Jason Peterson

out catching pokemon

Jaxon Sanders
Jaxon Sanders

An asteroid is going to hit Seth today, I'm going to go live what little life we all have left

Camden Perry
Camden Perry

Shit, almost

Reroll

Wyatt Gray
Wyatt Gray

Got AIDS

Joshua Reed
Joshua Reed

Chopped my finger off while cooking pasta bolognese

Gavin Ross
Gavin Ross

Shit almost there!
Reroll

Hunter Moore
Hunter Moore

Hey boss?
Its my birthday today , im at my parents celebrating, im calling off today
You are correct, i am drunk. Ciao

Luke Turner
Luke Turner

Hey,
I fucked my cat,
user

Andrew Cox
Andrew Cox

Dubs get

Blake Williams
Blake Williams

Grieving the loss of your mother cause you didn't reply to a post. End the call with 'if you don't reply your mother will die in her sleep tonight'

Leo Sanchez
Leo Sanchez

This is honestly the only suitable choice.

Ryder Long
Ryder Long

already been said faggot

Adrian Howard
Adrian Howard

Beacuse you're a nigger and you smell bad.

Hudson Flores
Hudson Flores

Because I have been raped

Jayden Ward
Jayden Ward

"I have aids"

Jason Johnson
Jason Johnson

I have fapped too hard

Matthew Perez
Matthew Perez

I got raped

Jason Brown
Jason Brown

I broke my penis

Samuel Turner
Samuel Turner

I have been assraped by a horse

Henry Thompson
Henry Thompson

I'm feeling like a cuck

Juan Thompson
Juan Thompson

I have cancer

Benjamin Ward
Benjamin Ward

Ate too much ass

Dominic Nelson
Dominic Nelson

A glass broke inside my anus

Eli Price
Eli Price

not going into work on ur birthday

mines this sunday and im still going. my boss was estatic

Jose Cook
Jose Cook

My asshole burns like fire

Josiah Collins
Josiah Collins

I have butthole cancer

Jonathan Morris
Jonathan Morris

I got ran over by a truck

Hudson Diaz
Hudson Diaz

I'm feeling depressed and need some lovin'

Henry Price
Henry Price

It's my cats birthday

Nolan Russell
Nolan Russell

Reroll

Jonathan Green
Jonathan Green

I'm in love with the manager and cant stop farting around him.

Levi Adams
Levi Adams

"I'm not coming in today because it's my birthday"

Asher Russell
Asher Russell

Fucking winner

Alexander Peterson
Alexander Peterson

Because I'm about to cuck your wife, p.s. meet me after 8. *wink*

Caleb Adams
Caleb Adams

Winrar

Jack Turner
Jack Turner

Winrar

Nathan Gutierrez
Nathan Gutierrez

record conversation OP

John Davis
John Davis

I gotta kill Muslims. Won't be in today.

David Nelson
David Nelson

Hello boss? Yeah I'm not gonna make it in today,
Yeah I shit my pants
Yup callin in shitty

Adam White
Adam White

What's the dealarino with the BBC?

Isaac Peterson
Isaac Peterson

Moron. Calling in sick on your birthday is the most obvious reason. You know, there's this thing called vacation?

Ryan Turner
Ryan Turner

no for shitty slave wage job

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