Sup Sup Forums. I'm 26 and I suffer from crippling social anxiety. I feel horrible about it...

Sup Sup Forums. I'm 26 and I suffer from crippling social anxiety. I feel horrible about it. It's been over 10 years now and it's only got worse over the years. There's so much I want to do in this world but I feel so uncomfortable around other people, I'd rather hide inside like a little bitch.

It's so fucking depressing. I see beautiful girls everywhere and instead of approaching them like a man, I cower in fear.

At this point of my life I am mostly friendless. I have lots of acquaintances and a best friend I barely see anymore who I don't even really like. I recently got out of a 10 year relationship with a girl I knew was a lying whore because I had no respect for myself and because I lack the ability to be with someone else.

Whatever you are about to suggest to me, I've tried it all and nothing has worked. I want to feel sad but I am so depressed, I am too numb to feel emotions. My Dad has cancer and I don't even feel anything about it but we have a shitty history so that could have something to do with it.

What the fuck am I supposed to do?

There are days where I have the freedom to do anything but there's nothing I want to do. I feel broken. I can watch TV, listen to music, read a book, go for a walk, go to the beach, whatever I want but none of it is appealing to me.

Start doin heroin or something.

I don't want to be addicted to drugs. I want to be happy and sober. I don't mind doing drugs on the side but I don't want that to be my main source of happiness.

Just remember this, you miss all the shots you dont take.
You are okay, you have to adjust to get out of your comfort zone. At first it feels unnatural but remember the goal, to better yourself. Never lose sight of what you want. Be a better you, be the best version of yourself you possibly can.
Take some risks, do different stuff.
If u want to see changes, things have to change! So change it up!
Grtz user

Im a true alpha male, i get girls all the time so listen up.

rule nr 1 ( you need to live by this )
STEP OUT OF YOUR COMFORT ZONE

Go out, fake a good confidence until you get good confidence.

Go out clubbing, get drunk.
Do drugs, ( amphetamine )

Start working out, geta hair cut, buy new clothes.
Become arrogant

>Whatever you are about to suggest to me, I've tried it all and nothing has worked

So why are you asking us what to do? I was about to post advice, but if you're just going to reject it then nevermind

You should start looking for medications. What kind of medications have you tried so far?
Look for a good psychiatrist and give a try to anything and stick to it: SSRIs, benzos, amphetamines, whatever.
Also, have you looked into ketamine, MDMA, LSD or mushrooms? Some people use it as a very effective therapy.

The reason you are alpha is because you don't feel the way I do. It also makes it harder for you to understand what I feel like.

I spent the last 5 years going to clubs and doing drugs/getting drunk on the weekend. I had to be fucked up to feel comfortable in an environment like that.

And I do work out but I don't have the confidence to get a hair cut or dress in a way that would make me stand out.

(OP)

Oh and of course, don't say ''i'd rather not take stuff''. You can't prefer a miserable living.

This. Had to force myself outside. (This is recent). Went and got a graveyard shift job with a medium amount of people, and it's been helping me to adjust to being in public. And even more recently, I've been forcung myself to go to the mall or movies. It gets better if you let it user, the only obstacle here is you. If you feel the need, seek the help of a professional, counselor or otherwise

Sorry, I will listen to whatever you have to say.

I've tried both SSRIS and benzos. SSRIs made me feel like a zombie, benzos were fucking incredible and made me feel how I want to feel but I ended up having to take them every day and didn't want to become addicted so I stopped. A year later, my anxiety is still through the roof without them.

I have done MDMA and LSD and have had incredible experiences on them both but unfortunately none of it has translated into my sober life.

I also had some bad experiences on LSD where my social anxiety was magnified and I still remember those intense feelings of fear. It has stuck with me.

Realize that you're going to die one day and so will everyone else you know.

View life as a joke and stop taking yourself so seriously.

I'm open to taking anything that would help me, I just believe I've tried everything I could by now.

I'm in college and I workout almost every day so it's not like I'm a complete shut in, I just do the bare minimum I have to do because I'm so terrified of being around other people.

Honestly, the best thing for you to do would be to seek out clinical help. Look for a therapist, meet with a psychiatrist, something along those lines. Because it sounds like you might need professional help; that is NOT a bad thing, I was in therapy for years and if you are open to it it can be really useful and such a fantastic tool. You might need medication for a possible chemical imbalance (again that isnt really something bad, just out of your control) and might need to make some changes, but that will take time and is a slow process. Been there before buddy, and its not something you can do alone; seek help, and be open to it, it is ultimately the best path to feeling better in general :)

Ok, if you are feeling really shit something might actually be wrong with you. Go get some bloodwork check your hormones, your Test levels might be fucked up.

Also, do steroids, they do wonders for your confidence lol....better do them then drugs.

Also, dont be afraid of stepping out of your comfort zone, the world is full of insecure people. Nothing to be afraid of :)

I do realize that, it's something I'm terrified of actually and don't know how to cope with.

Good thing you abandoned the benzo habit, that shit ruins your life in the long term. Maybe try Adderall, MAOIs?

These comments are a fucking joke. Like he hasn't tried all this motivating talk stuff in 10 years. You're the cancer that breeds facebook memes.

another great tip i have for you is to go on tinder, yes tinder.
Swipe yes on every single girl out there and then get shit tons of matches wich will automaticly boost your confidence.

For the real reals, you just gotta spend less time at the computer. I somewhat assume you think 4-5 hours a day is way minor ammount of hours spent, and easily go 8+++ hours a day - You have extremely underdeveloped social skills, combined with not getting in touch with your underlying emotions. The ones that affect you subconsciously, making you feel "wtf is wrong with me", when actually you are just ignoring REAL issues by distraction. Quite an evil cycle, good news is, getting good and enjoying being social excellerates very quickly, and you'd be suprised how good it feels to just socialize in a developed comfortable setting, is'a some reward-chemical shit going on, just like real drugs. Good luck.

I feel you man, I know all this stuff and people consider me a pretty ''philosophical'' and ''thoughtful'' person and still I can't get myself to stop acting awkward once in a social situation.

I'll consider it but I feel like I've been down that road already and it didn't help. Maybe I'm wrong.

Recently got a physical and my results were perfect. Doctor was actually surprised even my Vitamin D levels were good lol. I know you mean well by saying "don't be afraid" but I can't control it. It's a physical feeling like there are chains holding me to the ground. It's a living hell.

Adderall isn't the answer. Amphetamine comedowns are terrible for anxiety. What are MAOIs?

Atleast i dont take pills to feel happy, you fucking faggot.
Im trying to help the guy.

Its not bullshit if its true and if it works fucktard ;)

I actually am on Tinder. I match with barely anyone and the people I do match with are disgusting. I posted my pic on here a few times and people rated me 7s and 8s so I'm not even bad looking, I just don't get matches for some reason.

'Monoamine oxidase inhibitor'. Just a stronger antidepressant. There's also shit that combines SSRIs and MAOIs. There's a lot of stuff.

Try different clothes, haircuts, descriptions and see if it makes a difference.

Be arrogant, cocky in your description.

Typical manchild that doesn't understand that the mental issues others suffer are worse than any stupid passing emotion he has ever experienced.

I would recommend staying away from drugs.

You can't beat social anxiety. But you can significantly reduce it through a lot of social exposure and learning to stop caring so much what people think (therapy can help with that).

troof

no matter how old you get, its all about the mindset, how you achieve it, and how you tell your brain to make it happen. ignoring any feel of embaressment is crucial. anything related to a negative external opinion is a self-fuck-over,

Boo fucking hoo, you special little snowflake. Take some more shit then.
I could not care less.

That is where I want to be. I just have no idea how to get there. You are right though, I do distract myself with the internet and other things.

SSRIs made me feel like a zombie so I don't know if something stronger would be better but honestly, maybe I do need that.

I'm shirtless and my info says "Fat girls swipe left" lol. I thought that'd be good enough but nope.

You get rid of social anxiety by spending more time with other people. simple

Right, like the youtube celebrities that post videos about how they suffer from "social anxiety". Pisses me off.

Nowadays I do. I realize they don't help, they're just a tool people use to avoid their issues. It's hard to give myself social exposure when my heart races and I feel like I'm dying around people. My thoughts are racing so fast, it's hard to even speak. It's fucking pathetic.

"you can't beat social anxiety"

yes you can, im certain you had a problem with the "i" and "you" mistrade

cant beat social anxiety, why?

Hate those people lol.

I think different people interpret social anxiety differently. For me it feels like a disease but for someone who doesn't have it, it seems like no big deal and something that can be easily overcome with a little bit of effort.

You might need to start with things that are a little bit easier.

But you really do need to challenge yourself. If you're not experiencing some distressing physical symptoms, you're not trying hard enough. I remember feeling the urge to vomit before I would do social exposure exercises, but I pushed through it and it helped greatly.

Quit being a little bitch!

I overcame it by surrounding myself with ppl.
I got a gym membership etc.

I understand, I hope you find something that works for you. I have had it where it didnt help, because i was either not open to it or I just hadn't wanted to get better and a big part of me was okay with feeling so shitty. It really only works (in my experience) when you, yourself, are wanting to change and when you are comfortable in that setting. When I used therapy, and at which point it was useful for me, was probably a few years after I had started going to a therapist (not that earlier times werent helpful, but not nearly to the extent as they were later on).

Also, you got to find a person you are comfortable talking with. Whether it be a specific age group, gender, etc, it is all about not only finding someone you are comfortable around BUT also remembering that any and ALL advice that they give you, whether or not you end up taking it to heart, is in what they perceive as your best interest. Its a job that they went into so they can help people; remember that if you end up looking for someone to talk to, as you might not find someone you are fully comfortable around the first time, and I know how much it sucks having to talk about your life to someone you haven't made up your mind about.

Hope you get better man, try not to focus on the bad things in life, but the good things. Can be hard sometimes when the bad things are so in-your-face. Cheers!

99% of people experience social anxiety. Just to different degrees. That's why public speaking is the number one fear in the world. Once you realize that your feelings aren't so irrational, it's easier to get better.

Perhaps I should say it like this:

You can't expect to never experience social anxiety again. But you can overcome social anxiety disorder and lead a normal life.

I do challenge myself, only to fail miserably. Over and over again. It's discouraging. Over 10 years now and it's only gotten worse.

I go to college and I go to the gym. I socialize with some people at school but I feel VERY nervous doing it and it never gets better. I don't want to feel like I'm crawling out of my skin talking to a friend...

At the gym, I am very avoidant. I have low self esteem and manly men make me feel inferior.

OP, what im saying is, you are distracting yourself RIGHT NOW, and you feel so comfortable about doing it, that you use it for relief instead of figuring shit out. I know it all seems overwhelming, but it has all to do with not trusting your instincts, and going for "the known", to just get off. I'm sure you've got deeper evaluations of whats going on, but instead you read shit on Sup Forums, to hopefully agree on what you actually think. Help is a great option, but if you utilize it wrong, you just fuck yourself over, 'cause "deep inside", you know whats wrong. I assume you've realized how quick years pass by now, and you better go fuckin' ape-monkey-munk-mode to better yourself, or you just fuckin' "live" on, waiting for someone to aknowledge the feeling thats so concentrated that only YOU can cure it . Don't Hope you know what i mean, Papa Bless.

How tall are you?

Thanks man, appreciate that advice.

I know what's wrong with me and I'm not avoiding anything. I try to figure it out almost 24/7 and I can never find the answers or feel differently. I distract myself because I have no other options, I don't feel comfortable doing social activities.

6 foot 4

That ain't something you think, that's actual facts. Someone offering insight on how to deal with it, is something else. Stop the hover.

Knowing whats wrong with you, but not dealing with it, is knowing you have to jump in a video-game, but keep walking straight down into the spikes that kill you.

It's NOTHING. Means absolutely shit. Might aswell not have known about it, since your actions are the same. Take advantage of the fact that you are aware of the problem, and work towards it.

You are playing the "alright guys, you guys, i suck at this game, i know im bad, i dont care tho" - wanting everyone else to go "oh c'mon OP you faglord, you ain't that bad, you good at this one thing" ,,, theme.

Get good, ANYONE can do it.

Not at all, I don't want sympathy, I know exactly where I stand and I genuinely have no idea what the fuck to do about it. I'm not looking for people to tell me everything is ok because that's bullshit and I'm not that kind of person. I feel hopeless and lost and just wanted to anonymously talk to some people about how fucking horrible I feel because I'm hoping someone can help.

It really doesn't get better, it gets worse. As for me the only thing that helps me deal with the pain is probably the fact that I hate women more than I hate myself, I think it probably at least takes a lot of the hate for myself that I have away anyway. They say that when you commit suicide you go to Hell, from what I have heard about Hell, I think it'd be a lot better than living in a place where the only person you can trust is yourself.