I have a blonde big titted virgin coming over today, hopefully I can fuck her, how do I get her in the mood and if so...

I have a blonde big titted virgin coming over today, hopefully I can fuck her, how do I get her in the mood and if so, what should I do with her? Tit job?

proof or bullshit story

How would you like me to prove it?

idk, some chats between the two of you, for example

maybe even a picture of her

We mainly talk on the phone but here is a pic

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she looks like a dude but thee tits seem big so i approve. carry on op

MOAR NAO!

So how to get her in the mood and if so, what shall I do to her?

OP, if this is a Virgin, I'm Vin Diesel

tfw you're thinking she's a virgin

>blonde
Get your eyes checked, bud.

She ain't no virgin you fig.

Nyquil, lots of it mixed in to fruit punch, offer her some in a nonchalant way and then, sore asshole. Have a small batch hidden away that isn't laced so you appear to be drinking the same thing.

Have fun with her anus op!

Consensual sex in the missionary position for purposes of recreation

Actually is, 100%

Yeah, this is what a virgin looks like. And she's going to have sex with a neckbeard like you. People really fall for this catfish shit?

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Drop the noods

idk how old you guys are. what i would do bring beer or liquor dont get her drunk just get a good buzz going. then and this is key fire up netflix and watch "eyes wide shut" good movie but idk but chicks get horny as fuk its nevered failed for me. as far as what to do to her idk dealers choice i suppose

Tell her that you'll send a Japanese fleet after her if she doesn't fuck you.

sauce pls? google gave me nothing

Oh, she's fat and sloppy, shouldn't take much.

>Hey girl you hungry
>pull dick out
>make fuck

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Nigga I fucked that girl last night

Of original picture?

the fuck is a tit job?

arm the harpoons

>virgin
heh

You need to be locked up. Sick motherfucker.

Google it, you put your dick in between her tits like a sandwich and fuck em

>I have a blonde big titted slut coming over today, hopefully I can get out of the friendszone, how do I get her in the mood and if so, what should I do use on her? chloroform?

OP ordered a gynecological exam to verify the presence of the hymen, as well as a lie detector test and obtained sworn affidavits from previous boyfriends, submitted under penalty of perjury.

>virgin
>pic looks like she gets fucked for a snickers bar
still, moar

split her in to 3 normal sized girls and put a bag on it

She's a 6 pack, but I'd still hit it just to degrade the fuck out of her

Thank you, I actually did!

its like a handjob but she uses her tits instead of her hands also known as titty fuckin

Oh, she's fat as shit. I believe it now.

She looks like my friends grandma

She's hot I'd fuck her, cum on those big tits and make her call me a sex God

i believe you she be ugly af

that's my ex

she likes to eat poop and bdsm

i'm pretty sure she aint a virgin. there's a couple of fucked up bitches out there that like to claim they're virgins to up their value or because they're delusional and think that if they regret fucking their ex bf it makes all the fucking they got not count.

If she is a virgin, she looks like the type of girl you can at least get a blowjob out of her and suck on those titties.

Right? I wanna bust nuts all of those tits

FAKKIN WARU

Try and be her friend first. Works 100% of the time for me

Not blonde, probably not a virgin either. Good luck though op.

I already did that, her breath stinks sometimes too, tired of talking, lets get to fuckin

i know Sup Forums posters will do anything but damn standards are sliding. i guess its best you dont set your sights any higher though

Any more pix?
Or link to insta or FB?

Thanks user, send the luck of the gods to me

Fuck you asshole

Awww nigga, that's fuckin Martha!! She ain't no virgin cuz

LMAO

LOOOL THIS NIGGA KNOWS

I know that girl!
dude I fucked her this one time at a friends party, she's really into rape roleplaying. I think you should just knock her out cold, tie her down and just fuck her ass, cum in it and just leave her in a ditch. Remember to give her your number before leaving her though

also, her safeword is "supercalifragilisticexpialidocious"

Her face looks beat in the second picture, but those tits....

Yeah, last I heard she was tryna fuck this mark name david for some grocery money or sum shit

Seems legit

What the fuck? Lmfao, how you know her?

hah dude. aren't you trying to get her turned on so she'll fuck you?

Chicks hate that shit.

just get her drunk, put on either fun music or a funny mainstream movie and get close to her on the couch.

you'll know what she's down for.

if she is down, she'll probably make most of the moves.

It's true. She and I never fucked, but she would freeze my turds and use them as dildos, so technically so a virgin.

tequila, or roofies

Nigga, many homies in Gilbert know this hooker

Ayy, I see what you did there

my god, we did the exact same thing

was fun though

good ol Martha

fig. Go fig.

Post results tonight my brotha. Cum on those tits, take picture post it my nigga

Hey OP, is your name David Videz??

Na what the fuck

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Kek, every single time, OP done goofed

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please stop

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this is where the thread gets good

>big titted
no OP, she's fat
big tits doesn't count when you're fat

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We've all already checked her twitter. When u gonna message her and post the results?

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shit about to git gud

>OP thinks this is a virgin

You better wrap her in the American flag and pretend she is miss America because that bitch is ugly

that might actually be OP in the pic

can anyone confirm?

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Dude just be alpha, man up and tell her that you want to give her the old lickaroo.

works every time,

Aw man don't warn her or ruin this for OP I kinda want him to get his dick wet.

Real talk she seems fun and she's a bit heavy so she probably won't be too self-absorbed.

Just make her laugh and you'll be golden. Best things to watch are TERRIBLE movies. Like Tommy Wiseau tier.

GL!

PS she's big so have nice snacks!

Fuck you OP

Lol why the fuck would OP post advice to himself.

Samefagging this hard

yah I mean sure that's me... but I ain't OP. OP dun goofed by posting here but still I'd rather he still gets to fuck. I get nothing out of ruining it for him.

Holy fuckin no. No no no no no.

bitch isnt blonde; that hair is clearly dyed. OP you daft cunt

Best way to screw this girl is tell her the wrong address OP

Those titties arent big; they are saggy pancakes. Overall volume = small

>I get nothing out of ruining it for him
Get the fuck off of Sup Forums then faggot

idk man I get way more out of it if he comes back with a story about fucking her. I don't really care if we ruin it and she gets angry and he's sad but idk maybe I'm not as misanthropic as usual atm.

Do you have nudes or not