ITT:

>ITT:
Weird things you think only you do.

I'll start.
I only date women so I can get to their fathers. I've orally diddled more dads in their sleep than you could ever imagine.

I pull pin worms out of my ass crack and chew on them. That''ll make the fuckers learn.

Boy howdy, user, that sure is fascinating.

I need more of this.

How did you get pinworms user and how do you know you have them?

classy user

Not 100% sure but I think it's lana ivans. She does mfc / did hardcore porn

I've had them for over 8 years now. I got then from a holiday in Egypt.

I play Pokemon Go

I spit in customers drinks at weather spoons

I look at pictures of women with their clothes off.

ok i'll go.
when i masturbate i just rub a little to the right of the base of my penis. i havent actually touched my dick in i dont know how long.

are you gay or something?

I take 40mg of prozac,20mg of busporine,1 one a day mens vitamin, and 1200mg of fish oil,smoke a spliff, drink a coffee with a nip of rum every morning.

I doubt anyone takes that exact combo

I love snowballing a chick after she's blown me. I actually try and impregnate my girlfriends too.

Damn I just have my rum straight with no coffee, so close

I like corrupting men...especially cultivating masturbation addiction, and humiliating fetishes in previously normal males. the thought of them ruined and unable to fuck anymore is just ...
delightful

...

I put ketchup on my ham sandwiches.

So you're an average woman. Big deal.

Ive done that. I put ketchup on everything.

When i prder food with ketchup on it i bring my own to add more.

Ketchup is god tier sauce

sauce on op

If she is lactating, that's hot as fuck.
If not, it's still reasonably hot.

Oh yeah well, I put peanut butter on my pancakes.

B-but... That's only FOR WAFFLES!

Interesting, how do you get started on that hobby? I might give it a try.

Waffles are degenerate.

I have a weird fetish where I can to girls that hang their tongues out in pics, I dunno why but it's so hot

Only difference for me is I consume a manly 1500mg fish oil. Close but no cigar for me.

literally why would he do that

i fart into my hand and smell it

anybody have the source on ops gif

I put ice in my hot food to cool it down

I self mutilated when I was younger so I would have interesting scars I could tell fake stories about to seem interesting and now I just regret it

We talking about the spitting or the licking of the beasts ass?

You are not the only one, Fucking tongues are hot dude.

that's not that weird. There's a nerve cluster there. I guarantee other people do that too.

I can hardly tell if he spit there but that aside why the ass eating

I take pictures of weird stuff in the toilet and show it to people at work so they think I have weird poop. Like one time it was a cup of moldy coffee I pored in the toilet

cow blowing google it

so do i

I do something similar but I also have a cigar after my coffee

Come on someone has to have the source!

I post lies on the internet

Ok so I at least understand the idea behind it then, but why right after she fucking shit?!?!?!? I mean if he had just walked up after and didn't notice is one thing but dude just stood there and watched that shit come out then puts hits nose right up in it. Cow literally even looks back and gives him a "bro wtf, really now?!?" kinda look.

I put peanut butter on graham crackers

I improvise an obituary for the millions of my dying sperm every time I ejaculate. I find myself doing it in my head sometimes even when I don't mean to. I guess it's because my parents told me that I was always committing murder and killing my future babies. I realize now they were just saying that because they are religious freaks and they tried to convince me to stop masturbating. I never stopped, it only made me feel bad after every time I blew my load. And now it's just a habit for me.

Sometimes I'd stay up late at night wondering about all of the potential scientists and geniuses that I've wasted for nothing more than a quick wank. But then I start thinking, I could've been the future father of a murderer or a rapist who could've been running rampant amongst society if I hadn't flushed them down the drain. So I don't feel too bad.

Also, I get that they are dumb niggers but really even they couldn't invent the bellow to blow air up there for that reason? I mean its a simple idea to blow air and it would be far more effective then sticking your face up to it and blowing into its fucking cooch

might as well follow through with it and tell those fake stories to people you don't think will be around in your life long enough to matter. It's perfect for picking up girls for sure as a conversation opener. You can start with "wanna know how I got these scars?"

I make my gf not shower for a month. Then I harvest the smegma in her labia.

pic kind of related (imagine that x 100).

don't look at this picture or your mother will die tonight

Oh thank god I thought I was a weirdo. Also I just realized that my post made it look like I had a stroke...can someone dump hot tongue pics

I read through my gf's fb messages with ex boyfriends and jerk off to her being a slut. Favorites are her describing what it feels like when he's in her ass, her promising to deepthroat him all night, and her telling him she loves it when he cums in her mouth.

The most intense orgasms but i have trouble looking at my GF for a few days

My car has a 6 speed manual transmission but I rarely use the 5th one I walk go from 4th directly to 6th.

thats messed up
why would you do something like that?

Aem it's just.. ... ... What???

...

anyone got source for OP post?

i bite my toenails

you are a disusting human being

agreed user. ever tryed pb&j on a rice cake? god tier

...

I put ketchup on soup

I put pins through my toes then cum on them... got moar pics if interested

I always wanted sauce of this

U waste time?

I always smell my socks when I pull them off

Masturbation is off limits! Leave those poor guys alone. Is there no code of the Internet anymore?

/thread

U ruin other men....

Sometimes I poop in the shower and the I throw it to the toilet,.... Sometimes I miss tho.

Moar

Ahem! No thanks.

So u record guys masturbating? Sounds better how u say it lol. Faggot.

...

Chew the inside of my cheek. I got lines of chewed up flesh where I do it, have for years.

I masturbate every single day,. Maybe more than once a day since puberty,.. I'm 31 now

Ur gf is homeless?

>anymore
>implying there was a before

... good lord

I put ketchup on scrambled eggs.

He has to pretend to be a woman hours every night too.

I mean...

Same bro. Getting braces helped me stop mostly. I do a lot of licking/pressing my tongue against teeth in particular orders an up till certain numbers.

are you functionnal after that?

...

Someone recorded me masturbating one time on a cam site and posted it on YouTube for me to get down. These faggots are the scum of the earth no question. What's the point? I masturbate?

This was when I was 19 though so at least I got smarter

...

>I've had them for over 8 years now

Holy shit user, go to the fucking pharmacy and get some damn medicine.

T'was me! And I'd do it again for I am THE RUSESTER!!!!

Im 39 and married, and I rape my 25yo 8/10 roommate sometimes 3 times a week when her diabetes causes her to pass out unconscious.

sometimes when i'm chillin naked or something and my package is warm and at its most saggy, i flop my cock and balls over my wrist and say in a brittish accent " i'm dick wristwatch"

You win

They are easily cured, dumbass. Just get the pills that make your shit bright red. Talk to your doctor.

I do that all the time, its basically a tic now.
I like the feel of the flesh between my teeth.

10 internets

U ruined my teaching career Why?

If your age is on the cock
you are ready to flop

whoa dude...crazy.

sometimes I'll masturbate before I go to sleep